Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Life's a Bitch....So Are You
Three years had gone by. Fresh out of college Mandy made it her business to be a music critic for Rolling Stone, she succeeded. Not only did she write reviews she occasionally wrote articles if she bugged her boss and she was good at her job she loved her job.
Her life was perfect, she had everything, no problems the only thing she didn’t have was someone to share it with. She kept telling herself she didn’t want a boyfriend she thought it would get in the way of her career, make her lose focus.
Patrick, who was still proudly promoting his successful record Soul Punk a record Mandy had not listened to fearing that a song might be about how much of a bitch she is. When she thought about it she was so happy that she forgotten about Patrick she actually feared him. She feared hearing his name, hearing about him on the news or the internet, seeing his face pop up. If that happened she’d back at square one, miserable. She wanted to listen to his record but she couldn’t she listened to the first minute of Spotlight and almost broke into tears. So she spent the last three years of her life pretending Patrick Stump never existed. It was pretty bad at Pete and Sarah’s wedding Patrick had heard she was coming so he told Pete to make her come once he leaves. She missed the ceremony, he missed the rest of the wedding, just so they didn’t have to see each other or be in the same room.
”I want to be there for the ceremony!”
“I’ve been Pete’s best friend for over 10 years the only reason he’s your friend is because of me! I’m the best man I’m going and you’re not!”
“I’m a bridesmaid! It’s not your wedding you can’t decide who gets to come or not!!”
“You’re not ruining this! If you go I’m not Mandy!”
“Fine! But I’m going to the reception! I want to be there Sarah and Pete are my best friends!”
“No skin off my ass, I can miss out on the reception.” He said before hanging up.
That was two years ago and the last time Mandy’s spoken to Patrick, she didn’t say his name the entire time, and she held back tears throughout the phone call. For the past three years Mandy referred Patrick as him or he. She never said his name.
When you think about it, it really was a miserable three years but Mandy just ignored it. She didn’t let it get in the way of her life but at night it bothered her, when she tried to go on dates with other guys it really bothered her she just didn’t admit it to herself.
Mandy arrived at work December 12th, two days before her 23rd birthday.
“Well fuck me sideways.” She said as she sighed and sat behind her desk.
“What’s wrong?” Lauren her co-worker asked. She was a photographer for Rolling Stone and a damn good one. She and Mandy were a team.
“I’m going to be 23 years old in two days and I haven’t been laid in 16 months, meanwhile my mother’s telling me I should get married.”
Lauren laughed. “I promise everyone here is chipping in on a party that will have you laid plenty of times in one night.”
“Sure hope so, batteries don’t last forever you know.”
“Yeah but you don’t have to wait an hour with batteries.”
Mandy laughed before sipping on her coffee. “True.” She said as she nodded.
“Ms. Marks, Ms. Wenner would like you in her office.”
“Fuck.” Mandy said underneath her breath as she got up.
Ms. Wenner is Jann Wenner the editor of Rolling Stone AKA Mandy’s boss. She doesn’t have any problems with her boss they got along quite well actually Jann says Mandy reminds of her of herself when she was in her early twenties. Mandy didn’t know if that was good or bad but she smiled and nodded anyway.
“What’s up doc?” She asked as she leaned against her doorframe.
“New Year’s is coming up along with the Jingle ball. I want you to cover them both.”
“Me? Both of them?”
“You can have help if you like or you can choose which you really want to do. I just want you doing an overall review on everyone’s performance that night. Too much for ya?”
“Not at all who’s gonna be there?”
“At which event?”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“Well” She said as she put on glasses and read something that was lying on her desk. “Kanye West, Jay-Z, Beyonce, White Stripes, Justin Timberlake, The Damned Things, Weezer, All Time Low, Cobra Starship and Patrick Stump will be playing the Jingle ball at the garden.”
Mandy muted every other word she said after Patrick Stump. A name she hasn’t heard in two years since Pete’s wedding and now her boss wants her to go to his show? Sure he’ll be on stage for less than twenty minutes but that’s all it will take for her.
“I’m gonna take the New Year’s Eve bash, I wanna witness Dick Clark having his 80th stroke.”
Jann laughed. “You got it. You’re free to go kid.”
“Thanks boss.” Mandy said as she got up.
“Oh and Mandy?”
“Yeah Jann?”
“Happy early birthday.”
Mandy smiled. “Thank you.”
She came home from a long day at work and screamed soon as she sat down in her living room.
“AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” She screamed as she pulled at her hair. “FUCK ME, FUCK ME, FUCK ME!!! WHERE THE FUCK DID HE COME FROM, ARGGGGHHHH FUUCK!!!”
Mandy put her nervous breakdown on hold when there was a knock at the door.
“I hope you’re not having sex, cause if you are I can leave.” Her brother Nick said with a frightened look on his face.
“No Nick I’m not, I’m very aggravated and stressed.” She said as she rubbed her head and gave her brother a glass of water.
“What’s the problem? Trouble at work?”
“Sort of…okay not really.” She said as she sighed. “My boss wants to me to go to the Jingle ball and the New Year ’s Eve bash thing or I could choose one or the other and let someone else do the other one I heard who’s coming to the Jingle ball and I’d love to go but I fucking can’t.”
“Why?” He asked confusedly.
“The person I’ve forgotten about since three years ago is also performing at the Jingle ball.”
“….I’m blank here.”
She huffed. “Patrick!” She shouted. It was odd to her. She hadn’t said that name in years soon as she did his face popped up into her head.
“Oh…just don’t go.” He said simply.
“I knooow but I want to go! Joe and Andy are gonna be there along with Gabe Victoria Alex Nate and Ryland! They’ll hate me if I don’t go.” She said as she made a pouty face.
“If you tell them they’ll understand. Take them out before the concert hang out with them.
You’re an adult dammit.”
“I’ve only been an adult for 2 years Nick.”
“Technically 3 since your birthday is in two days and even more technically you’ve been an adult since you were 18 because 18 year olds aren’t considered minors.”
“You would know.”
“Oh very mature miss adult.”
Nick helped Mandy decide that she was definitely not going to the Jingle Ball, the two siblings went out for dinner and afterwards Mandy sat in her apartment watching Ferris Bueller’s Day Off on DVD. Once the movie finished Mandy came to the conclusion that she was a mixture of Cam and Ferris only not as charming as Ferris Bueller but just as pathetic as Cam but in a loveable way.
Mandy tried to go to sleep that night but she couldn’t so she did something that no one does anymore. She wrote a letter. To Patrick but she didn’t mail it. She planned to but she just read it over and over again until she got sleepy.
Mandy’s birthday rolled around within those two days Pete had called her and said he was going to be in town and Andy and Joe were going to come in town early along with Cobra.
“My boys!!” She screamed as she opened the door for Pete Andy and Joe and hugged them.
“Happy birfday!” They all shouted.
“Thanks guys, I’m so happy you came!”
“Of course we came it’s your birfday!” Joe yelled.
Mandy laughed. “Go ahead and get comfortable, you guys thirsty?”
“Water will do.” Andy said as he sat down.
“So what do you want to do for you birfday Mandy?”
She sighed. “I don’t even care, I’ve gotten at that age where your birthday is just another day.”
“EW YOU SOUND LIKE A GROWN UP!!” Joe shouted.
“But seriously babe what do you have planned?” Pete said as he sat next to her.
“Well some of my co-workers want to throw a party but I’m not into it.”
“Parties are fun! We’ll invite everybody it’ll be just like old times!”
“I hope I don’t end up crying then.” She said sarcastically.
“He’s not gonna come don’t worry.” Andy said.
“I know, he wouldn’t come if god begged him.”
Later on that evening Mandy got dressed and she and the guys picked up Brooke Sarah and Lissa and met everyone to the club she called Paige to invite her but she was swamped with work but she wished her happy birthday. Mandy wished their entire crew was there like Caro and The Academy boys but they couldn’t make it either.
“Wooow faaancy.” Mandy said as she walked up to Lauren.
“Nothing but the best for you Clark.” She said as she laughed. “Happy birthday.” Lauren said as she hugged her.
Mandy smiled. “Thanks this is awesome, I don’t know how to repay you.”
“Get laid.” Lauren said as she handed Mandy a drink.
“I’ll try my best.” She said as she shrugged.
The night went on and so far Mandy did not get any type of ass imaginable but she was with all of her friends and that’s what mattered to her (and she got a pretty good buzz that night too).
Her life was perfect, she had everything, no problems the only thing she didn’t have was someone to share it with. She kept telling herself she didn’t want a boyfriend she thought it would get in the way of her career, make her lose focus.
Patrick, who was still proudly promoting his successful record Soul Punk a record Mandy had not listened to fearing that a song might be about how much of a bitch she is. When she thought about it she was so happy that she forgotten about Patrick she actually feared him. She feared hearing his name, hearing about him on the news or the internet, seeing his face pop up. If that happened she’d back at square one, miserable. She wanted to listen to his record but she couldn’t she listened to the first minute of Spotlight and almost broke into tears. So she spent the last three years of her life pretending Patrick Stump never existed. It was pretty bad at Pete and Sarah’s wedding Patrick had heard she was coming so he told Pete to make her come once he leaves. She missed the ceremony, he missed the rest of the wedding, just so they didn’t have to see each other or be in the same room.
”I want to be there for the ceremony!”
“I’ve been Pete’s best friend for over 10 years the only reason he’s your friend is because of me! I’m the best man I’m going and you’re not!”
“I’m a bridesmaid! It’s not your wedding you can’t decide who gets to come or not!!”
“You’re not ruining this! If you go I’m not Mandy!”
“Fine! But I’m going to the reception! I want to be there Sarah and Pete are my best friends!”
“No skin off my ass, I can miss out on the reception.” He said before hanging up.
That was two years ago and the last time Mandy’s spoken to Patrick, she didn’t say his name the entire time, and she held back tears throughout the phone call. For the past three years Mandy referred Patrick as him or he. She never said his name.
When you think about it, it really was a miserable three years but Mandy just ignored it. She didn’t let it get in the way of her life but at night it bothered her, when she tried to go on dates with other guys it really bothered her she just didn’t admit it to herself.
Mandy arrived at work December 12th, two days before her 23rd birthday.
“Well fuck me sideways.” She said as she sighed and sat behind her desk.
“What’s wrong?” Lauren her co-worker asked. She was a photographer for Rolling Stone and a damn good one. She and Mandy were a team.
“I’m going to be 23 years old in two days and I haven’t been laid in 16 months, meanwhile my mother’s telling me I should get married.”
Lauren laughed. “I promise everyone here is chipping in on a party that will have you laid plenty of times in one night.”
“Sure hope so, batteries don’t last forever you know.”
“Yeah but you don’t have to wait an hour with batteries.”
Mandy laughed before sipping on her coffee. “True.” She said as she nodded.
“Ms. Marks, Ms. Wenner would like you in her office.”
“Fuck.” Mandy said underneath her breath as she got up.
Ms. Wenner is Jann Wenner the editor of Rolling Stone AKA Mandy’s boss. She doesn’t have any problems with her boss they got along quite well actually Jann says Mandy reminds of her of herself when she was in her early twenties. Mandy didn’t know if that was good or bad but she smiled and nodded anyway.
“What’s up doc?” She asked as she leaned against her doorframe.
“New Year’s is coming up along with the Jingle ball. I want you to cover them both.”
“Me? Both of them?”
“You can have help if you like or you can choose which you really want to do. I just want you doing an overall review on everyone’s performance that night. Too much for ya?”
“Not at all who’s gonna be there?”
“At which event?”
“Doesn’t matter.”
“Well” She said as she put on glasses and read something that was lying on her desk. “Kanye West, Jay-Z, Beyonce, White Stripes, Justin Timberlake, The Damned Things, Weezer, All Time Low, Cobra Starship and Patrick Stump will be playing the Jingle ball at the garden.”
Mandy muted every other word she said after Patrick Stump. A name she hasn’t heard in two years since Pete’s wedding and now her boss wants her to go to his show? Sure he’ll be on stage for less than twenty minutes but that’s all it will take for her.
“I’m gonna take the New Year’s Eve bash, I wanna witness Dick Clark having his 80th stroke.”
Jann laughed. “You got it. You’re free to go kid.”
“Thanks boss.” Mandy said as she got up.
“Oh and Mandy?”
“Yeah Jann?”
“Happy early birthday.”
Mandy smiled. “Thank you.”
She came home from a long day at work and screamed soon as she sat down in her living room.
“AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” She screamed as she pulled at her hair. “FUCK ME, FUCK ME, FUCK ME!!! WHERE THE FUCK DID HE COME FROM, ARGGGGHHHH FUUCK!!!”
Mandy put her nervous breakdown on hold when there was a knock at the door.
“I hope you’re not having sex, cause if you are I can leave.” Her brother Nick said with a frightened look on his face.
“No Nick I’m not, I’m very aggravated and stressed.” She said as she rubbed her head and gave her brother a glass of water.
“What’s the problem? Trouble at work?”
“Sort of…okay not really.” She said as she sighed. “My boss wants to me to go to the Jingle ball and the New Year ’s Eve bash thing or I could choose one or the other and let someone else do the other one I heard who’s coming to the Jingle ball and I’d love to go but I fucking can’t.”
“Why?” He asked confusedly.
“The person I’ve forgotten about since three years ago is also performing at the Jingle ball.”
“….I’m blank here.”
She huffed. “Patrick!” She shouted. It was odd to her. She hadn’t said that name in years soon as she did his face popped up into her head.
“Oh…just don’t go.” He said simply.
“I knooow but I want to go! Joe and Andy are gonna be there along with Gabe Victoria Alex Nate and Ryland! They’ll hate me if I don’t go.” She said as she made a pouty face.
“If you tell them they’ll understand. Take them out before the concert hang out with them.
You’re an adult dammit.”
“I’ve only been an adult for 2 years Nick.”
“Technically 3 since your birthday is in two days and even more technically you’ve been an adult since you were 18 because 18 year olds aren’t considered minors.”
“You would know.”
“Oh very mature miss adult.”
Nick helped Mandy decide that she was definitely not going to the Jingle Ball, the two siblings went out for dinner and afterwards Mandy sat in her apartment watching Ferris Bueller’s Day Off on DVD. Once the movie finished Mandy came to the conclusion that she was a mixture of Cam and Ferris only not as charming as Ferris Bueller but just as pathetic as Cam but in a loveable way.
Mandy tried to go to sleep that night but she couldn’t so she did something that no one does anymore. She wrote a letter. To Patrick but she didn’t mail it. She planned to but she just read it over and over again until she got sleepy.
Mandy’s birthday rolled around within those two days Pete had called her and said he was going to be in town and Andy and Joe were going to come in town early along with Cobra.
“My boys!!” She screamed as she opened the door for Pete Andy and Joe and hugged them.
“Happy birfday!” They all shouted.
“Thanks guys, I’m so happy you came!”
“Of course we came it’s your birfday!” Joe yelled.
Mandy laughed. “Go ahead and get comfortable, you guys thirsty?”
“Water will do.” Andy said as he sat down.
“So what do you want to do for you birfday Mandy?”
She sighed. “I don’t even care, I’ve gotten at that age where your birthday is just another day.”
“EW YOU SOUND LIKE A GROWN UP!!” Joe shouted.
“But seriously babe what do you have planned?” Pete said as he sat next to her.
“Well some of my co-workers want to throw a party but I’m not into it.”
“Parties are fun! We’ll invite everybody it’ll be just like old times!”
“I hope I don’t end up crying then.” She said sarcastically.
“He’s not gonna come don’t worry.” Andy said.
“I know, he wouldn’t come if god begged him.”
Later on that evening Mandy got dressed and she and the guys picked up Brooke Sarah and Lissa and met everyone to the club she called Paige to invite her but she was swamped with work but she wished her happy birthday. Mandy wished their entire crew was there like Caro and The Academy boys but they couldn’t make it either.
“Wooow faaancy.” Mandy said as she walked up to Lauren.
“Nothing but the best for you Clark.” She said as she laughed. “Happy birthday.” Lauren said as she hugged her.
Mandy smiled. “Thanks this is awesome, I don’t know how to repay you.”
“Get laid.” Lauren said as she handed Mandy a drink.
“I’ll try my best.” She said as she shrugged.
The night went on and so far Mandy did not get any type of ass imaginable but she was with all of her friends and that’s what mattered to her (and she got a pretty good buzz that night too).
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