FicWad

In the end everyone turns into the person they always told you they wouldn't..
Sometimes I feel that Gerard and I may as well be strangers.

I sat in my room feeling oddly empty. Like there was nothing left.

I walked out of the room and into the lounge where Gerard was sitting. He didn't look up when I entered, he continued to stare absent mindedly into the cackling fire.
"Gerard?"
He didn't move for a moment, then looked across to me.
"What?" He said, sounding slightly annoyed.
"Mind if I sit with you?"
He studied me, digging deep into my eyes with his own.
"Yes" He sighed.
I sat down next to him, watching him turn away from me.
He didn't say anything. He wouldn't even look at me.
"Gerard?" I said softly.
He did nothing. He only continued his vacant gaze at the fire..
"Gerard." I said again, a little louder. "Hey Gerard, remeber me? I used to mean everything to y-"
"What is it Mikey?" He snapped "What do you want from me now?"
"What's the matter with you Gerard.. What happened to you?"
"...Alright, I admit, I miss how things used to be.. But I can also admit that I've accepted the fact that things change."
"W-What are you talking about? What has changed about you that's made you act.. well, the way you are.."
He opened his mouth like he was about to argue back but closed it quickly. He swallowed and looked into my eyes, sending chills down my spine.
"Do you ever feel like you're seconds from losing your mind?" He whispered, looking very seriosly into my eyes. "I don't really know what's happening at the moment either..There's this thing that... that makes me both happy and sad. I'm still trying to work out how that can be.. And I can't tell if it's killing me or making me stronger."
He stood up and I quickly stood up next to him, never breaking eye contact. Everything that Gerard says seems to be hinting, like doesn't want to tell me.. but he needs to.
He frowned sadly at me and turned to start walking to his room.
"Don't turn your back to me." I said sternly but quietly.
He sighed, "There is nothing else that needs to be said." He said quickly.
"Don't go, Gerard. I-I can't do this without you."
He looked at me with narrowed eyes.
"I just feel like nothing is going right anymore. Everything's wrong."
He stared at me with no emotion. He breathed in slowly,
"...You're too young to believe that it's not going to be okay"
He turned back and left to his room. I watched him as he left.
I frowned.. I understand that people change.. But him becoming someone who was almost unrecognisable saddened me.
It's like everything has been turned upside down.. I can't help but feel that it'll never be the same again.

This is all happening so fast and I feel like I'm tackling it all on my own.

I barely know what's real anymore.

I feel like I'm dead, but breathing. Not alive, just breathing.

This chapter is crazy short, sorry. I didn't really have time. I'll try update more ofte; im on holiday now so i'll have more time. Please RandR xx