FicWad

(At the showers. Laughter)

Arrow:
Dumb Fucks!!! You men owe me a new pair of slippers! [More laughter]
And I do not squeal like a girl! [He turns to see a straw soldier (Ric and Cri-kee) riding a panda bear.] Eeeeeeek!!!

Ric:
[In a deep voice] Urgent new from the general! [He holds out a scroll] What's the matter, you've never seen a black and white before?

Arrow:
Who are you?

Ric:
Excuse me? I think the question should be, who are you! We're in a war, man! There's no time for stupid questions! I should have your hat for that! Snatch it right off your head! I'm feeling gracious today, so ... carry on. [Arrow turns, and the panda climbs up a nearby tree.]

*

(In the captain's tent)

Arrow:
Captain! Urgent news from the general! We're needed at the front!

Ric:
Pack your bags, Cri-kee, we're moving out!