FicWad

The buzzing was starting to get to Brendon. His phone hadn't stopped all night. But he couldn't get himself to answer. He laid down on his bed, staring up at the ceiling, listening to the endless buzz on his nightstand. Sarah had gone to her friends place for the night and wouldn't be home till late. So it was just a man and his thoughts…. and a lot of buzzing.
Why would Ryan do what he did that night? There was no point to it. Brendon silently wished he could find the sense in it all. He knew that Ryan was the one calling him over and over, but he couldn't reach his hand over to pick it up. His body was stuck. A numbness was taking over him and he couldn't fight it…. nor did he want to. He closed his eyes, hoping he would fall asleep.
He let his mind drift off. He wasn't conscious of what he was thinking, just that he was happy there. He was wrapped up in a blanket, warm, and with someone else. Their fingers ran through his hair slowly, putting his worries to rest. He would never move from this spot, in the arms of this person he loved.
A pounding woke him from his dream. Brendon sat up a little too quickly, making his head spin. He rubbed his eyes, as the pounding continued. Standing from the bed, he shook his head to wake himself up. Slowly, he walked towards the front door. He knew who would be on the other side, and wasn't sure how he felt about it. Fighting against his doubts, he opened it.
"I've been calling." Ryan said flatly. Brendon nodded.
"I've been ignoring."
Ryan stared into Brendon's eyes, hoping to find some forgiveness there. He was met with only emptiness. Brendon moved to the side, allowing Ryan to come inside. He closed the door and turned back to face Ryan.
"What do you want?"
"Just to talk to you." Ryan responded, flinching from Brendon's hate filled tone.
"Well, talk away." Brendon leaned against the doors.
"Look, we're never going to make up if you don't give me a chance."
"I'm giving you a fucking chance, talk!" Brendon shoved his hands in his pockets. Ryan looked away from him, and walked further into the apartment. He glanced around, noticing that Sarah was no where to be found.
"You're here alone?"
"Yep." Brendon said, following Ryan into the family room. Ryan nodded, not sure where to begin. He let out a long breath, preparing himself, when Brendon cut him off.
"I'm not sure what you want me to say." Brendon shrugged. Ryan bit his lip, trying not to break.
"You don't have to say anything. I do." Ryan began, needing to come clean. Brendon raised his eyebrows. Ryan took a few steps closer to him, and looked into his chocolate eyes. Brendon's stomach began to flutter. "I will fuck up your life. I will ruin a good relationship between you and Sarah. I will cause a whole bunch of shit with your fans, with the guys in the band, hell, even with your family. I will say stupid shit, and do stupid things. I will drive you crazy, and I will make you want to cry on occasion. I convinced myself that if we were together, that I'd end up ripping you apart. I couldn't let you convince me otherwise."
"W-what?" Brendon stuttered, caught off guard.
"Bren, I had to lie to you. I would have given into your fight if I hadn't." Ryan explained.
"How do I know you're not lying now?"
"You really think I'm that heartless?" Ryan shook his head.
"Well I-"
"No. Don't answer, I don't care. Brendon," Ryan stood in front of him, and touched his cheek, "Don't believe for one second that I don't love you."
Brendon's eyes filled with tears. His heart beat took off, and he was speechless.
"I meant everything I said that night." Ryan continued, hoping Brendon would respond.
"So did I." Brendon whispered, still finding his voice. Ryan smiled, tears coming to his eyes too.
"I know it must be hard to trust me. I know I fucked up. I'm sorry for everything I've put you through."
"I knew you were a fucking liar." Brendon smiled. Ryan laughed slightly, pulling his hand back from Brendon's face. Brendon caught Ryan's hand in his own and pulled him into a hug.
"I could kill you for fucking with my mind that much." Brendon whispered into his ear. Ryan laughed again.
"I said I was sorry, okay?"
Brendon backed away from him, and looked him in the eyes. He couldn't believe it. Just when he thought he had lost him for good, he was back again. He couldn't control himself, he pulled himself into Ryan, and pressed their lips together.
Ryan kissed back, feeling the smile on Brendon's lips. How could he have ever denied himself this? He was so completely in love with Brendon. They moved to the couch, not allowing their lips to part. Brendon pushed Ryan down, and climbed on top of him. His smile was uncontrollable. His brain was still realizing that Ryan, HIS Ryan, loved him. He kissed Ryan harder, their tongues moving together, their hands exploring each other.
"I fucking love you, Ryan Ross." Brendon whispered.
"I love you too." Ryan smiled, his heart beating out of his chest. Brendon put little kisses all over his face, and neck.
"If you ever…" He breathed between kisses, "Fuck me over like that again…. I'll kill you."
"I promise I won't," Ryan put his hand on Brendon's neck, and pulled their lips together. "But maybe… you could fuck me over again?"
Brendon smiled devilishly, and grabbed Ryan's hand. "Come on."
He pulled Ryan towards the bedroom. Brendon swung him around, and closed the door. He turned back to face Ryan, pulled his shirt over his head, walked over to Ryan and kissed him fiercely. Ryan pulled his shirt off also, barely letting his lips escape Brendon's. Brendon walked them back to the bed, causing them to fall onto it. Ryan rolled Brendon onto his back, and began kissing all over his chest. He started messing with Brendon's belt buckle, as he moved his lips back to Brendon's. He pulled his belt off, as Brendon rolled back on top of him. They were both breathing hard, dying to be as close to each other as physically possible, but something made Brendon pause.
He heard the front door open, and then shut.
"Bren?" Sarah's voice called from the front room.
Brendon and Ryan both looked at each other.
"Fuck!" Brendon whispered, climbing off of Ryan. Ryan scrambled off the bed, and grabbed his shirt from the floor. Ryan looked around the room, not sure where to go. He settled for laying on the floor on the side of the bed far from the door. Brendon threw his shirt on, and messed with his hair. The bedroom door opened slowly.
"Hey." Sarah started, "You okay?" she noticed his heavy breathing.
"I'm fine. You just startled me a little." Brendon sighed. Sarah glanced down at his pants. No belt, unzipped, and he was a little… happy to see her.
"You sure?" She smirked. Brendon glanced down at himself, and blushed.
"Huh, yeah. I'm good." He smiled. Sarah walked into the room a little further. Ryan pulled himself into a tighter ball on the floor.
"Need me to take care of anything for you." She added playfully. Brendon shook his head, but continued to smile.
"Nah, I'm good, beautiful." He shot her down as nicely as possible. Her brow creased, but she shrugged.
"Suit yourself. I'm going to shower." She turned, and walked out the door. Brendon waited until he heard the bathroom door close, and the water turn on, before turning to Ryan.
"Well, shit." Brendon laughed. Ryan stood up, and pulled his shirt on.
"I need to get the fuck out of here." He giggled. The two walked out of the bedroom, towards the door. Brendon opened it for Ryan.
"I'll see you tomorrow?" Ryan asked.
"Definitely." Brendon agreed. Ryan kissed Brendon, and turned to leave. He turned back for a second.
"Promise?"
"Promise." Brendon smiled. Ryan kissed him again… and then again… and again, not wanting to go home to his empty house.
"Stop teasing me." Brendon whined, not wanting Ryan to leave. Ryan laughed.
"I love you."
"I love you too. Now get your sexy ass out of here." Brendon kissed him one more time, before shoving him out of the door and closing it behind him.