(#) youcanstakemyheart 2011-12-01yay! new chapter! anyway-i really liked it and you're AMAZING with descriptions. like the whole first paragraph-just, wow. MAybe a little more dialogue spread through it, to break up the really deep thoughts? I dunno, i think it's pretty awesome though. Please update soon!
Author's responseThank you very much! I totally get what you're saying about dialogue and I will ensure to spread it out better through the entirety of future chapters; thank you soooo much for letting me know how to improve, it's extremely helpful! Thank you for taking the time to review! :)
(#) KobraBlaze 2011-12-01Wow new chapter is just amazing. I love it when Frank and Mikey speak (or stutter) to each other. It is really well done. Brilliant job!
Author's responseThank you very much; I'm sooo glad that you liked it! Thanks for taking the time to leave such a nice review! :)
- oh my gosh frank oh no what have you done og poor gerard oh no he has a new brother ohhh noooooes!
i kinda agree with youcanstakemyheart about spreading dialogue throughout the thoughts, but wow your writing is AMAZING
Author's responseThank you very much; I agree about the dialogue thing too and will try my best to improve it with future chapters! Thanks for being honest and helping me to improve. Thank you very much for taking the time to review! :)
I have to admit, I skimmed. I'm ashamed. I went back and read them as soon as I knew what happened though... I'm really glad I did. Your writing is awesome :]
I've been sitting here reading through the chapters punching Gerard in the face repeatedly in my mind. I love his character so much, he's so confused and he barely knows it and Frank knows what he needs to be doing and I just wish the world was all rainbows and butterflies :[
Seriously this is a great story
Author's responseThank you very much; I'm really glad that you like my writing. Don't be ashamed of skimming,half the stuff I write is probably quite dull so I don't blame you for skimming it! I'm pleased that you went back and read them through though, even more pleased that you liked it!
Thank you soooo much for taking the time to review! :)
(#) CatscanFlyy 2011-12-02AH so i feel like I don't review enough, I meant to yesturday but ,my computer totally flaked on me and now I have to use my moters crummy laptop >.< I think this is my favourite chapter so far, it was beautifully written (as always) and the friendship forming between Frank and Mikey is so sweet! there were so many stunning images in here and a I thurally enjoyed every aspect of this chapter, I don't know how you update so quickly with such amazing chapters but I'm so glad you do! AND YOU'RE SO LOVELY AND MODEST! I just want to glomp you! Hope you have a good weekend I shall be waiting on your next update! C: x
Author's responseThank you very much; I'm really glad that you liked this chapter, I myself wan't really too sure about it.
The secret to quick updates? Intense amounts of sugar and caffeine, topped off blaring stereo speakers blasting out some MCR!
Aww, I'm not modest; just honest.
I hope that you have a fab weekend, you deserve it for leaving such a nice review that has me grinning as I type this response!
Thanks for taking the time to review, it really means a lot! :)
(#) tortillachip 2011-12-02I really like this. It's very well written and its very interesting. It's one of those things that just demands your attention. You've got a way about your writing that makes even the smallest details sound so interesting. I don't know what it is, but there's definitely something fantastic. Anyway, this chapter is very interesting. I like the part where you say his words are like arrows, they seem like they should be dull because of his stutter, but it shows how sharp they really are in the quiet he and Frank were in and how hard it was for Frank to hear them. I also how Mikey's telling Frank what's wrong, but he's not really telling. Not all of it at least. When you get a chapter In Mikey's point of view his words are so clear and you know exactly what he's feeling and all that stuff, but when he speaks he doesn't get it out so well. I don't know why, but I like that. I also like the last line. It was such a clever way to end it and it was a great twist. All Frank had to do was say "It's okay Mikes. I won't do anything you don't want me to." but he had to say he did. I'm genuinely wondering what's going to happen next. I really like the fact that in almost every chapter you touch on the fact that Mikey wants to go back to being Gerard's younger brother and Gerard being his older brother, and Gerard knows it too, but he's not really trying to work on it. Well, it just seems like he forgot how to act like a brother. I know Gerard himself wasn't in the chapter, but I just wanted to say that. "I smile sympathetically at him; you know it’s bad when you, a kind almost-stranger, are better with a kid than his own big brother." I really like this because it's true. Sure Frank cares about Gerard and all, and it's obvious that Gerard isn't doing so well with his brother, but Frank can't get between them before they have a repeat Mikey locking himself in the bathroom. This chapter was brilliant, much like all the other chapters, but in their own way. There's something unique about each one Well, beautiful job and this is so amazingly well done.
Author's responseThank you sooo much; I'm very pleased that you liked it and didn't think it boring! I'm relieved that it got your attention and wasn't tediously boring becuase I wasn't too sure about this chapter.
I was kind of going for Mikey chapters to show that he actually has a lot he needs to say, he just can't get it out; so I'm glad that you got that and that it reached into other chapters as I had hoped it would.
Thank you ever so much for taking the time to leave such a nice and helpful review; you've made me smile! :)
(#) SyraStrange 2011-12-02Frank better not lead Mikey on. I will definitely start getting angry when that happens...
Author's responseMaybe he will, maybe he won't... I'll leave you to ponder that one.
The next chapter is up and I'll try to do number fifteen at some point today.
Thank you very much for taking the time to review! :)
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