Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Finally Free
Quick author's note: Hello all, I'm sorry this chapter took so long. I've been dealing with my own anxiety attacks so it hasn't been easy. Please forgive me and enjoy.
Amelie woke up to Gerard’s voice filling the room.
“Yes Mikey, Gramps is alright. Amelie’s wonderful. I don’t regret the 6 month thing. Yes I know, we’re gonna start recording when the group gets back. Our flight’s tonight. Yep you will meet her. Oww stop yelling, I can’t bring you the freaking London Eye!” Gerard replied, laughing at his little brother’s request.
Amelie closed her eyes and counted to 10. She was safe with Gerard, yet a part of her was kicking herself for doing all this with someone she barely knew. She thought of taking it slow. But she knew it would involve getting to know each other, something Amelie didn’t know if her heart could take. She heard her phone ring, prompting her to get up and answer the call as Gerard was ending his.
“Hello?” Amelie picked up, trying to keep herself composed as an all too familiar voice replied.
“Je’taime Ams…” Adam replied coolly. He was in New York, insider her apartment fixing her things. She had texted him her plans, which he found incredibly ridiculous, yet he had always felt it was his duty to care for her.
“Hello Adam…” Amelie replied. Across the room, Gerard had stiffen up. He didn’t know whether he should stay or go. He decided to leave, but linger near the door. He had to throw the nearest thing, his shades, to Frank on the couch. He motioned for Frank to lower down the television volume and keep quiet.
Frank shrugged and did as requested. Truth is, he was just as curious.
“Ams, I cleaned up your apartment just in case. How are you? How are your attacks? Did you take your medicine?” Adam asked impatiently. He had missed her voice but he wouldn’t allow himself to admit it.
“OH! The meds! I forgot, I’ll take them today, sorry” Amelie said.
“C’mon now, you can’t be missing this, you know it’s important. Don’t tell me that Gerard Way dickhead can’t take care of you or I swear I’ll call Joe and ask him to have you in my care” Adam threatened, rubbing his head as he stumbled around her apartment.
“Adam! Don’t you dare! I’m doing better, mind you. Gerard’s wonderful and so are his friends.” Amelie reassured him, lying back and staring at the ceiling. It was the truth, She had never felt so comfortable and accepted, even in just 2 days of knowing the men.
“Bullshit. Friends? God, what are you thinking agreeing to all this? That you live with 5 different guys in 6 months, while they fucking record? You couldn’t even go with me! I offered you the same conditions Ams! Why are you taking a chance now when you wouldn’t take a chance with me!!” Adam yelled out, punching a wall. His anger was growing, out of the pain he felt from being away from her. It had been months, he had lost count, because of the guilt eating him up. He felt guilty leaving her, yet now he felt jealous someone was around to do things with her. When she wouldn’t have done all those with him, it was unfair. He felt horrible.
Amelie cringed as Adam yelled, holding the phone away. Gerard peeped through and saw how upset Amelie was. “Don’t walk in” Frank whispered.
“What?” Gerard whispered back.
“I said, don’t walk in!” Frank whispered again. Ray was now peeping through is room. Frank and Gerard both shh-d the man before he could talk.
“Adam…please, let’s talk about this some other time. I’m tired. Goodbye” Amelie hanged up promptly, hoping he wouldn’t wreck her apartment.
Amelie sighed and got up, refusing to cry.
Adam tossed his phone aside, breathing deeply, feeling all the frustration and hurt. It hurt more, now than ever, because he knew he was going to see her. She was coming to New York. Somewhere reachable. It didn’t seem so distant now. The distance was his first way out, the easiest way to numb the pain with the comfort of “I’m not with her anyway”. But now, she was coming close. Even though he had told himself he had moved on, he had to see her. Just to make sure she was happy.
He sat down on her sofa, imagining his former fiancée with Gerard. He knew Gerard and hated the man. What could a former drunk and drug addict do better than he couldn’t? He didn’t believe she was safe with him. He had to see her soon. Opening up his phone once more, he dialed someone he knew Amelie would update.
“James? Yeah I’m done fixing up the place. Hey listen..what’s Am’s flight details?”…..
Amelie was about to walk to the couch outside the bedroom as the three men scrambled to look normal. Ray grabbed a newspaper, Frank turned the volume up and Gerard called concierge.
“Uhm yes, breakfast for 3 up here please. Coffee would be great. Alright” Gerard hanged up right as Amelie walked in.
“Could you please ask for any type of tea? I don’t drink coffee” Amelie said clearly as she sat down next to Frank, her hair tied up in a bun.
“Hello” Frank said, turning to her.
Amelie smiled and inched a bit away. “Hi…good..morning..”Amelie said slowly.”
“We leave in 5 hours, so pack your bags! Oh wait, you’ve done that…” Frank said, at first excited then confused. Amelie laughed at how he looked. His eyebrows were knitted together in thinking of what to say.
“You know…you don’t have to be so delicate with me. It’s…it’s like you..you edit words before you say them out loud. I’m comfortable with the three of you so far. You can tell me things, I don’t cry about everything you know…” Amelie explained, patting Frank’s head.
“You hear that? She’s comfortable with ME!” Frank yelled, pointing proudly.
“She said, all three of us, idiot” Ray said wryly, as he turned the newspaper.
“FOOD IS HERE FUCKERSSS” Gerard yelled out loud. Everyone started laughing as he marched in an lifted the cover of the tray while bowing down.
Amelie felt relaxed, it was nice to be around these goofy guys. She loved how they could contain themselves when she needed it, or how they could snap back to their loud-mouthed hyper sides on a spur.
The group dug in to the brunch and everyone noticed Amelie smiling brighter than sunshine.
As Gerard walked along the streets of London, he felt tempted to hold Amelie’s hand, but decided not to in fear of her reaction. So he trudged along, listening to everything she would say as she bugged him to help her buy a few souvenirs.
“You see, I’ve never met any of them but I’d like to get them something. Your brother and his wife, your drummer, Frank’s wife, Ray’s wife” Amelie rambled on. Gerard simply nodded.
Amelie stopped and stared. “Am I bothering you?” She asked Gerard as she noticed he looked sullen. She touched his arm slightly but he yanked it back.
“No, it’s just I hate the word wife, I would never want to marry again. It’s bullshit. C’mon let’s go back to buying your things” Gerard said slowly. Amelie nodded and smiled, only to cover up the pain she felt inside for him.
As they entered a boutique, Gerard looked around hoping his mind would get distracted. Amelie went off to a corner to purchase things.
Gerard saw a small glass butterfly. He squinted, thinking where had he seen it that it looked so familiar. He realized it was those in Amelie’s apartment.
“Hey Amelie, why do you buy these glass butterflies and scatter them all over the place? You know, anyone could step on them or break them” Gerard asked out loud. Amelie walked over to him and he noticed there were over a dozen in a box she was holding.
“Because, Gerard, they can break” Amelie said vaguely.
“What? That’s just dumb, why buy something when people can break it. It’s a waste of money” Gerard commented, putting the delicate figurine back to the shelf.
Amelie looked at him for a moment, trying to compose her thoughts without dropping the box of butterflies.
“I buy them because it reminds me how fragile I can be. I buy them because it reminds me of how beautiful things, things we love in our life, are fragile and fleeting. You have to learn to value them. Those who come in my apartment have never broken a butterfly because they are aware of how delicate these figurines are, and they begin to know their way around my place. It’s that value you hold once you realize something can be broken, that teach you to cherish it. You should know better than anyone to say you would never want to get married, because you can’t deny how fragile and wonderful it is despite how easily it can be broken.” Amelie said, staring into Gerard.
Gerard stared back, feeling his anger in self-defense, but found himself unable to say anything else. Because he knew all she said was true.
Amelie turned and paid for the items while Gerard waited outside, contemplating on the thoughts. His mind was jumbled by this woman, but strangely enough he found peace.
She uprooted him from his despair just to plant him in fresher soils. He looked back in and saw the butterfly by the shelf, and started to smile.
Amelie woke up to Gerard’s voice filling the room.
“Yes Mikey, Gramps is alright. Amelie’s wonderful. I don’t regret the 6 month thing. Yes I know, we’re gonna start recording when the group gets back. Our flight’s tonight. Yep you will meet her. Oww stop yelling, I can’t bring you the freaking London Eye!” Gerard replied, laughing at his little brother’s request.
Amelie closed her eyes and counted to 10. She was safe with Gerard, yet a part of her was kicking herself for doing all this with someone she barely knew. She thought of taking it slow. But she knew it would involve getting to know each other, something Amelie didn’t know if her heart could take. She heard her phone ring, prompting her to get up and answer the call as Gerard was ending his.
“Hello?” Amelie picked up, trying to keep herself composed as an all too familiar voice replied.
“Je’taime Ams…” Adam replied coolly. He was in New York, insider her apartment fixing her things. She had texted him her plans, which he found incredibly ridiculous, yet he had always felt it was his duty to care for her.
“Hello Adam…” Amelie replied. Across the room, Gerard had stiffen up. He didn’t know whether he should stay or go. He decided to leave, but linger near the door. He had to throw the nearest thing, his shades, to Frank on the couch. He motioned for Frank to lower down the television volume and keep quiet.
Frank shrugged and did as requested. Truth is, he was just as curious.
“Ams, I cleaned up your apartment just in case. How are you? How are your attacks? Did you take your medicine?” Adam asked impatiently. He had missed her voice but he wouldn’t allow himself to admit it.
“OH! The meds! I forgot, I’ll take them today, sorry” Amelie said.
“C’mon now, you can’t be missing this, you know it’s important. Don’t tell me that Gerard Way dickhead can’t take care of you or I swear I’ll call Joe and ask him to have you in my care” Adam threatened, rubbing his head as he stumbled around her apartment.
“Adam! Don’t you dare! I’m doing better, mind you. Gerard’s wonderful and so are his friends.” Amelie reassured him, lying back and staring at the ceiling. It was the truth, She had never felt so comfortable and accepted, even in just 2 days of knowing the men.
“Bullshit. Friends? God, what are you thinking agreeing to all this? That you live with 5 different guys in 6 months, while they fucking record? You couldn’t even go with me! I offered you the same conditions Ams! Why are you taking a chance now when you wouldn’t take a chance with me!!” Adam yelled out, punching a wall. His anger was growing, out of the pain he felt from being away from her. It had been months, he had lost count, because of the guilt eating him up. He felt guilty leaving her, yet now he felt jealous someone was around to do things with her. When she wouldn’t have done all those with him, it was unfair. He felt horrible.
Amelie cringed as Adam yelled, holding the phone away. Gerard peeped through and saw how upset Amelie was. “Don’t walk in” Frank whispered.
“What?” Gerard whispered back.
“I said, don’t walk in!” Frank whispered again. Ray was now peeping through is room. Frank and Gerard both shh-d the man before he could talk.
“Adam…please, let’s talk about this some other time. I’m tired. Goodbye” Amelie hanged up promptly, hoping he wouldn’t wreck her apartment.
Amelie sighed and got up, refusing to cry.
Adam tossed his phone aside, breathing deeply, feeling all the frustration and hurt. It hurt more, now than ever, because he knew he was going to see her. She was coming to New York. Somewhere reachable. It didn’t seem so distant now. The distance was his first way out, the easiest way to numb the pain with the comfort of “I’m not with her anyway”. But now, she was coming close. Even though he had told himself he had moved on, he had to see her. Just to make sure she was happy.
He sat down on her sofa, imagining his former fiancée with Gerard. He knew Gerard and hated the man. What could a former drunk and drug addict do better than he couldn’t? He didn’t believe she was safe with him. He had to see her soon. Opening up his phone once more, he dialed someone he knew Amelie would update.
“James? Yeah I’m done fixing up the place. Hey listen..what’s Am’s flight details?”…..
Amelie was about to walk to the couch outside the bedroom as the three men scrambled to look normal. Ray grabbed a newspaper, Frank turned the volume up and Gerard called concierge.
“Uhm yes, breakfast for 3 up here please. Coffee would be great. Alright” Gerard hanged up right as Amelie walked in.
“Could you please ask for any type of tea? I don’t drink coffee” Amelie said clearly as she sat down next to Frank, her hair tied up in a bun.
“Hello” Frank said, turning to her.
Amelie smiled and inched a bit away. “Hi…good..morning..”Amelie said slowly.”
“We leave in 5 hours, so pack your bags! Oh wait, you’ve done that…” Frank said, at first excited then confused. Amelie laughed at how he looked. His eyebrows were knitted together in thinking of what to say.
“You know…you don’t have to be so delicate with me. It’s…it’s like you..you edit words before you say them out loud. I’m comfortable with the three of you so far. You can tell me things, I don’t cry about everything you know…” Amelie explained, patting Frank’s head.
“You hear that? She’s comfortable with ME!” Frank yelled, pointing proudly.
“She said, all three of us, idiot” Ray said wryly, as he turned the newspaper.
“FOOD IS HERE FUCKERSSS” Gerard yelled out loud. Everyone started laughing as he marched in an lifted the cover of the tray while bowing down.
Amelie felt relaxed, it was nice to be around these goofy guys. She loved how they could contain themselves when she needed it, or how they could snap back to their loud-mouthed hyper sides on a spur.
The group dug in to the brunch and everyone noticed Amelie smiling brighter than sunshine.
As Gerard walked along the streets of London, he felt tempted to hold Amelie’s hand, but decided not to in fear of her reaction. So he trudged along, listening to everything she would say as she bugged him to help her buy a few souvenirs.
“You see, I’ve never met any of them but I’d like to get them something. Your brother and his wife, your drummer, Frank’s wife, Ray’s wife” Amelie rambled on. Gerard simply nodded.
Amelie stopped and stared. “Am I bothering you?” She asked Gerard as she noticed he looked sullen. She touched his arm slightly but he yanked it back.
“No, it’s just I hate the word wife, I would never want to marry again. It’s bullshit. C’mon let’s go back to buying your things” Gerard said slowly. Amelie nodded and smiled, only to cover up the pain she felt inside for him.
As they entered a boutique, Gerard looked around hoping his mind would get distracted. Amelie went off to a corner to purchase things.
Gerard saw a small glass butterfly. He squinted, thinking where had he seen it that it looked so familiar. He realized it was those in Amelie’s apartment.
“Hey Amelie, why do you buy these glass butterflies and scatter them all over the place? You know, anyone could step on them or break them” Gerard asked out loud. Amelie walked over to him and he noticed there were over a dozen in a box she was holding.
“Because, Gerard, they can break” Amelie said vaguely.
“What? That’s just dumb, why buy something when people can break it. It’s a waste of money” Gerard commented, putting the delicate figurine back to the shelf.
Amelie looked at him for a moment, trying to compose her thoughts without dropping the box of butterflies.
“I buy them because it reminds me how fragile I can be. I buy them because it reminds me of how beautiful things, things we love in our life, are fragile and fleeting. You have to learn to value them. Those who come in my apartment have never broken a butterfly because they are aware of how delicate these figurines are, and they begin to know their way around my place. It’s that value you hold once you realize something can be broken, that teach you to cherish it. You should know better than anyone to say you would never want to get married, because you can’t deny how fragile and wonderful it is despite how easily it can be broken.” Amelie said, staring into Gerard.
Gerard stared back, feeling his anger in self-defense, but found himself unable to say anything else. Because he knew all she said was true.
Amelie turned and paid for the items while Gerard waited outside, contemplating on the thoughts. His mind was jumbled by this woman, but strangely enough he found peace.
She uprooted him from his despair just to plant him in fresher soils. He looked back in and saw the butterfly by the shelf, and started to smile.
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