Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Give It Your Best Shot
Reviews
Give It Your Best Shot
(#) Fino-Lilian 2012-05-24
Wow, it's brilliant! You have the most creative ideas I've seen.
I love the way James behaved, since he was so calm and showed such a great self-control that I think even Harry who had gone through a lot was impressed. So I really hope he wouldn't tell Dumbledore the story as soon as he sees the man. After all, James Potter is an adult, not a student who couldn't make a decision without the help of the great headmaster.
As for Harry, I'm a little worried. I've seen the so-called independent!Harry or powerful!Harry who may be independent and powerful but also seems to hold extreme and radical opinions which ironically made me feel he was still immature and lacked a quality of trust and tolerance and forgiveness and anything else that cannon Harry was full of. Since so far I find that despite the strength and firmness your Harry implied, he's a good young man. I hope he won't behave cynical later.
I wonder if the teenage Harry will play a role in the story as it seems that this version of Harry is not just an ordinary happy boy who lives a happy life and has a lot of happy people to love and to be loved.
And reluctantly I want to suggest that you use as few OCs as possible in your story. An OC wife for Sirius is bad enough, and whoever this Bethany person is, sister or not, I'm almost annoyed with her already... though I must say it's your decision to design characters so don't be bothered by what I said... most of them are just rubbish.
Oh, and lastly, please update soon!Author's response
Hi...I first want to say that I really appreciate the review you left on my story. It is rare to get such an in depth and honest review. So thank you very much for taking the time.
As for some of your concerns, Harry will not be the typical Indy!Harry or Powerful!Harry. He is powerful and well trained, has survived a war, but he hasn't lost all of who he was in Canon. The changes in him and the altering of some of his view are byproducts of the war that he fought in his timeline. Like war does to all, he was forced to adapt and learn to do what was necessary to survive. However, in essence, he remains 'good'. He has a strict moral code that he lives by, which will become more apparent as the story continues.
As for teenage Harry, questions will be answered in regards to him. Though, I won't elaborate further on his role, as I don't want to give away spoilers.
Lastly, there will be OCs spread throughout the story. It's just the way things go. While JKR gave us a whole slew of characters, in retro speck, she gave us very few, as the Wizarding World is a vast place filled with plenty of witches and wizards all across the globe. However, I give my solemn promise that my OCs will not be rubbish, as you so put it. They will not take over the story, or be in scenes where they shouldn't be, and most importantly, Mary-Sues/Gary-Stews will be murdered and erased before they even reach publishing.
Anyways, before I get into a ramble on OCs and proper characterization and whatnot, I ought to end it here.
Thanks again for you wonderful review.Give It Your Best Shot
(#) Circaea 2012-05-27
I just wanted to respond to the other review and say I disagree with them about OCs, basically for the same reasons you gave. Their absence leaves stories cramped, either by forcing fanfiction authors to use characters who aren't really appropriate, or by just making the universe too small. I specifically enjoy seeing how other authors expand the universe!Give It Your Best Shot
(#) diresaint 2012-05-29
Hey! Just read the first three chapters of your fic and I liked it. It is similar to a few I've read but at the same time your taking a slightly different path with it so I look forward to where your going to end up. I too have doubts about O/C's but I liked your answer to previously stated concerns and wish you well with them.
update soon!
dsAuthor's response
Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far.Give It Your Best Shot
(#) Vanir 2012-05-30
Very nice.
I really do like James' reaction. Very professional, and as i would see a good auror. Not a fighter, not a moron but a good, skilled cop. The connections he made were plausible, he didn't go off half-cocked and he didn't waste time claiming anything as impossible. He just chose the most probable of the impossibilities. Harry on the other hand is rather odd. At this point, ch3, he's quite inconsistent. I cannot merge Canon, the mercenary thing and the Grey Lord in one person and have it make sense yet. OC's? Bring'em. Every Canon-character has been done to death and beyond. Just be careful not to bring too many into the story. All of a sudden the story becomes too complex and clumsy and impossible to steer. Too many OC's brought my story to a multi-year hiatus, so watch out! That said, i love the storyline so far. Keep up the good work!
VanirAuthor's response
Thank you so much for reviewing. I'm glad you like it so far and that you like James's reaction and find it suiting for him.
You'll find out more about Harry later on. I know his whole story. His first five years at Hogwarts were the same as in canon. However, after Sirius's death things went a bit differently, which led to all hell breaking lose. But you'll find out more about his life in time, as the story continues.
Oh, and I hopefully won't end up adding too many OCs, but just enough to make the story good.
ZenatheaGive It Your Best Shot
(#) BJH 2012-05-31
Wow, this is a really interesting take on the time travel genre. I enjoyed the wisedom you have given this James and the insight into it that Harry has.
If the AU Harry began having nightmares of canon Harry at seven and saw 12 years in roughly 7 then can we assume time passes differently in the two worlds? Could it be that Harry will defeat Tom in this world and be replaced into his injured body only shortly after the switch? Or has this Harry been dreaming of other Harry's life all along and it just wasn't enough to be called a serious nightmare?
The other major question is what caused the switch? Did Albus do something, or perhaps Neville came to realize that he can not fulfill the prophesy and wished for someone to come and help him? If we knew the cause then fixing that might reverse the switch.
BJHAuthor's response
Good spot about the differences between the timelines. Yes, time does pass differently in the two worlds and it was fully intentional. As for your other questions, you'll have to continue reading to find out.
I'm glad that you've found the story interesting so far and have enjoy what I've written. Thanks for the review, BJH.
ZenatheaGive It Your Best Shot
(#) lordamnesia 2012-06-10
Badass! Truly, a phenomenal idea, a slight twist on what at first seems to be a time travel story, but really isn't. Keep up the awesome work, I can't wait to see where you take this!Author's response
Thanks! I'm glad you like it.Give It Your Best Shot
(#) odonata617 2012-06-13
This is one of the best of this type of story I've ever seen. The characterizations. thus far, ring true. That said, it might be argued that James is a bit too accepting, but I don't think the story works otherwise so that will have to pass. But, engrossing. Can't wait for the next installment.Author's response
Thanks for reviewing. As for James being accepting, as the story continues you'll come to understand more about James and Lily's and how their son's 'illness', for lack of better term, have affect them. I've just update and you begin to see some of that in the new chapter.
Anyways, thank you for the compliment and I'm glad you like it. Oh, and thank you very much for your review.Give It Your Best Shot
(#) lleon 2013-08-06
Woah, seems its not a regular run of the mill time-travelling, alt universe gig going on.
Really liking both Porteur and James characters thus far. I wonder how far James love of Harry is influencing his trust in Porteur.
The more I read the more I want to read..
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