FicWad

Frank POV

I woke up the next morning with Mikey sleeping sweetly on my chest, and his arms wrapped around my neck. As carefully as I could, I slipped from underneath his arms and placed his head gently onto the pillow, making sure not to wake his peaceful stance.

Yawning, I stretched and strolled towards the door, my shoulders slumped. Memories from last night were shooting back to me. Gerard nearly died, I kissed Mikey, I fell out with Mikey and I can not get Gerard out of my head.

Damn him for being so fucking beautiful.

You see I can not deny I like Gerard. He’s so…unique. But he reminds me of my Dad. The way Gerard hit me the other night when he was drunk, I could see the venom in his eyes, just like my Dad. I couldn’t allow myself to get hurt by him. I want to save him desperately, but every time he connects with me he pushes me away immediately, and makes me feel worthless.

I don’t deserve Mikey. I don’t really feel anything towards him, he just looks after me. He reminds me a lot of my mother before she died…sweet and caring. The sort of person who would stay up with me all night, just happy to be in my company.

I miss my Mum so much…

Sniffing I ignored the urge to cry. I can’t cry.

I don’t cry.

Shuffling down the stairs I was greeted by a cheery good morning from Miss Way, followed by a wink.

‘Where’s Mikey?’ She asked, trying to stifle a small laugh.

‘He’s asleep Miss Way, I thought I would make him some coffee. Would you like some?’ I mustered a smile, trying to be polite.

‘Call me Donna honey. I shall be okay thank you Frank; I have to go work now.’ She replied, getting up from her seat, her honey coloured hair bouncing at her shoulders.

I waved a goodbye and smiled to myself, this day shall be good. Whistling I flicked the kettle on, and turned the radio on. Lady Gaga’s Poker Face was playing and I frowned at the lack of rock on the radio now a days. I started to sing anyway. Belting the chorus at the top of my voice I danced around the kitchen, head banging whilst putting some coffee in a couple of mugs.

‘CAN’T READ MY CAN’T READ MY NO YOU CAN’T READ MY POKER FACE!’ Too my delight, Mikey was leaning on the wall, eyebrows raised and smiling wildly, obviously enjoying my routine.

‘You can’t half move that body Iero…’ He giggled sarcastically, before it turned into hysterical laughter.

‘I can dream Way!’ I snapped my fingers, my lips twitching into a small smile.

‘Of course you can…Can I smell coffee?’ He asked, eye’s widening at the bitter sweet smell.

‘No. Unless you say I could pull of being Lady Gaga.’ I said, smiling evilly, clutching one mug to my chest protectively.

‘Fine! You could be Lady Gaga!’ He screeched, bolting towards me and grasping the other mug, taking three huge gulps.

I laughed at him happily; I'm glad things were back to normal. I started to walk towards the basement stairs and Mikey gave me a warning glance.

‘Better not Frank. Trust me.’ He spoke sternly. He rolled his eyes, clearly reminiscing on the many times he’s interrupted his brother’s sleep.

‘You can use the shower by the way Frankie, towels are on the rack.’ He offered, his tone changing to a much happier one.

‘Only if you come with me.’ I whispered seductively, and then winked to show it was just a joke. Mikey looked down and shuffled his feet, his cheeks glowing red.

Chuckling, I ran up stairs and hopped in the shower, singing American Idiot at the top of my voice, bubbles foaming on my body.

‘Frank? Frank! Where did you put him, where did you put our baby.’ A women cried out.

‘If it was up too me h-honey it would be a coffin.’ A ruff male voice shouted back laughing, stumbling over his own words.

I heard a fierce slap and then a soft thud, and the muffled cries of the women begging the man too stop.

‘Get on your fucking knee’s whore!’ The man roared, his voice deep.

‘Please please leave me alone!’ The women screeched again.

I was cowering in the downstairs cupboard, my little 5 year old hands over my ears, bawling helplessly as my Mother was being beaten up again. My eyes were yet again soar from crying, and I heard heavy footsteps stumble unsteadily down the stairs, the pace matching my little pulse, banging against my rib cage.
The footsteps stopped dead out side the cupboard.
The door slowly creaked open.
My eyes were streaming again.
Two ruff hands grabbed my little waist.
He started dragging me up the stairs.
My legs were grazed and my wrists were bruised.
I just wanted to my Mom.
He slammed open their bedroom door.
And a limp figure hung, swaying slightly from the ceiling.
A rope around her neck.
Pills covering the floor.
Blood pouring from her lifeless face.
Naked and beaten.
Dead.

My eyes shot open and I couldn't breathe properly. I shook my head quickly to get rid of the disturbing mental pictures. Taking a deep breathe titled my head against the tiled walls, the warmness of the shower filling the bathroom up with a thin humid mist.

After a warm rinse I climbed out, and wrapped a towel round my waist, and then skipped out, determined to stay in the positive mood I was in this morning.

I couldn’t let the past get to me now. For Gerard’s sake, and for Mikey’s.

As elegant as I am, I managed to trip on my way out and collapse to the floor, the towel discarded next to me. Cursing I stood up, and was met by the clueless terrified stare which is Mikey Way.

‘Erm…Er…Shit..’ He stuttered, his eyes not moving from my naked form.

‘Mikey close your fucking eyes!’ I squealed, covering up little Iero. I grabbed the towel and wrapped it round my waist again, my cheeks glowing like two cherries.

I saw Mikey peep through his finger, and then realized I was decent, relaxing slightly.

‘S-sorry.’ Mikey spoke quietly, his cheeks flustered too.

I started to laugh and strolled past Mikey, ruffling his hair.

‘It’s okay Mikey, you can look but don’t touch.’ I added cheekily.

I wasn’t the kind of one to be embarrassed for long.

Mikey lent me some of his school uniform, which hung tightly to my muscular frame yet was way too long. I gratefully thanked him and watched him straighten and hairspray his mousey hair.

‘Why are you watching me?’ He asked, puzzled.

‘The faces you pull are funny.’ I giggle. ‘I may be Lady Gaga, but you are definitely Poker Face kid.’ I joked.

‘Fuck you! It’s the glasses they make me look funny!’ He retorted, going crossed eyes and stinking out his tongue.

Eventually we both galloped downstairs into the kitchen, and Mikey boiled the kettle whilst I went out for a morning cigeratte.

I was greeted by a hunched figure on the garden wall. Smoke engulfing his skinny frame, twisting around his black straggly hair. Puffy amber eyes looked up at me, his porcelain skin looking flawless.

My heart skipped a beat and those darn butterflies returned to my stomach, making me blush.

‘M-morning, how y-you feeling?’ I muttered gently, the events of last night flooding back to me.

Gee was unresponsive, he just frowned at my presence and flicked his fag away half lit, and elbowed his way past me.

My heart gave a sharp twang and I felt like it was crumbling.

I saved his ass! What the fuck is his problem?

Gerard POV

Barging past Frankie’s disheartened face I trudged inside the kitchen, sighing heavily and sat on one of the dining room chairs.

‘You okay bro?’ Mikey asked, worry hinting his little voice.

Giving him the ‘leave me the fuck alone' stare Mikey nodded, and then reluctantly gave me a mug full of steaming hot coffee. A smile creped upon my lips, until Mikey pushed two pills from my medication in front of me.

I was about to flip when I remembered the plan. I think I fucked up last night, I can’t remember but I know I messed up. Muttering to myself I popped too in my mouth and swallowed, waiting for them to take affect.

Half an hour later the medication had taken its toll and I felt empty. I didn’t feel anything. Not anger, happiness or sadness. It made me sick. Flinging on my jacket and picking up my car keys I headed for the door, hearing two sets of footsteps behind me.

Mikey and Frankie were such good friends now.

I hated it.

Slamming the car door shut I put my keys in the ignition, my mind slightly fuzzy. I found a crumpled pack of cigarettes tucked under the seat so I flipped out my zippo and lit one, inhaling.

‘Gerard please...open…a window!’ Mikey spluttered. Shit I forgot he has asthma.

Grinding my teeth I opened one window, the warmth of the car quickly disappearing. Parking, I dragged myself out of the car, and lit another cigarette. I need to quit smoking.

It’s a way to calm the nerves.

Leaning against the car and crossing my legs I stared at my brother and Frankie walk of chattering to each other. It’s not fair.

Frankie is supposed to be mine.

But I can’t because of Levi.

Kicking the car slightly I walked off, keeping my head down, my black bangs obscuring my view. I ignored the taunts and the laughs and continued to walk towards my tutor. I pushed open the door with sufficient force and sulked to the back to my empty seat. Placing my earphones in my ears I pressed play and I listened to the morbid music by The Misfits. I closed my eyes and rested my feet on the desk, drowning in the melodies.

A ball of crumbled paper hit the back of my neck, which was followed by the roars of laughter escaping from the Jocks mouths. Groaning, I ignored then, but a couple of blows to the head later I was starting to twitch uncomfortably, my anger levels rising.

‘Gerard? Gerard! Your boyfriends at the door!’ Matt (one of the jocks) cooed excitedly, clearly loving the undivided attention.

My eyes shot to the door, where Frank was shuffling on his feet anxiously, desperate to get my attention.

‘For fucks sake…’ I cursed quietly, before flinging my feet off the desk and storming out the room, cheers echoing through the hallways.

I’ve had enough.

Grabbing the scuff of Frankie’s top I pushed him hard up against the lockers, pinning him up, terror flickering across him face. I picked up my fist, my whole arm shaking and went to swing, but stopped just before I hit his beautiful face.

What was I doing?

Shaking my head in disbelief I dropped Frankie to the ground, stumbling backwards myself, my hands pulling at my hair in regret.

‘Frankie I’m so sorry…’ I started, kneeling down next to him, stroking his cheek softly and brushing his bangs out of his eyes.

‘What the fuck is your problem dude!’ He screeched, a disgusted expression on his face.

Feeling guilty as fuck, I pounced on him, fiercely pressing my lips hard onto his, tears streaming down my mouth. Frank wrapped his arms around my neck, and kissed me back, forcing his tongue into mine and flickering it across the roof of my mouth making me moan in pleasure. My hands cupped his face as I pulled away, I didn’t want to let go of him. I concentrated on his perfectly formed mouth, smooth skin and massive innocent eyes. The way his mouth was slightly open and the way his cheekbones were clear, his eyebrows framing his eyes beautifully.

‘I’m better.’ I whispered defeated. Frank’s eyes had turned from anger to sorrow as he pulled me into a tight hug, breathing in my disgusting black hair and rubbing circles on my spine.

‘I’m scared I’m going to break you.’ He whispered back, his voice quivering. ‘I can feel your bones Gee…I’m scared for you.’ I could feel his body shaking.

‘You can’t break something that’s already broken sweetheart.’ I said softly, kissing his neck, sucking the skin slightly, leaving a faint purple bruise.

‘Is it just every guy Frank?!’ Someone spat, a shadow towering down over our entwined bodies.

It was Mikey.

And he looked pretty pissed.