Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Skinny Love

All My Loving

by wayuphighify 1 review

"And I thought you were starting to get normal again."

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Drama,Romance - Published: 2012-08-27 - Updated: 2012-08-28 - 2072 words

1Funny
Spencer can't help but stare at Brendon, who is practically jumping up and down in his seat out of pure boredom.

"Dude, that's so annoying." Spencer wines, resting his head on his hand across the lunch table. Brendon untenses and sinks down into his seat in defeat. "What's wrong with you anyway?"

"Nothing." Brendon begins tapping his foot along to the song stuck in his head. "All My Loving" by The Beatles, of course.

"Brendon," Spencer sighs, "is it because of Ryan? He'll be here in like, ten seconds."

Brendon just rolls his eyes, looking around the room timidly. "Seriously, by the way you're acting, I'd think you have a condition or something." Spencer explains, making Brendon pale.

"I'm fine, Spencer. Fine."

In reality Brendon is freaking out. Not because of Ryan, but because of the fact this morning his mom tried to force him to church at five in the morning, then got sworn out by his father who added, "And I thought you were starting to get normal again". Which made him break down in his bathroom; taking deep breaths and try to avoid the razors in his drawer. He didn't do it though, mostly because he wouldn't be able to make it to school or see Ryan. He hasn't seen him all day, then he feels arms wrapping around his shoulders. "Hello, beautiful."

Brendon jumps, turning his head to see Ryan, who lays an extremely brief kiss on the side of his head.

"Hey," Spencer interrups with a cheeky smile on his face.

Ryan smiles and sits next to Brendon, resting a hand on his lap as he picks at a barrito. "You doing alright?"

"Just a little stressed. We'll talk about it later."

And that's all Brendon says for the rest of the period.

--

"So why were you so... mute all day. Isn't that my job to be upset all the time?' Ryan asks calmly as he turns out of the school. "You didn't eat lunch, you were practically playing the whole 'Drum Line' soundtrack on your lap during music."

"I had a rough morning." Brendon sighs. "My Mom... tried to get me to go to church, then Dad got really frustrated and yelled at me,"

"Brendon..."

"He said, 'I thought you were starting to get normal again'." Brendon feels pathetic; wanting to cry over something that probably sounds so trivial to Ryan.

"I thought you didn't come out yet," Ryan says confusedly, looking at Brendon as he pulls into his driveway.

"I... uh, didn't."

"They know about your cu-"

"No."

Ryan just keeps looking at him; turning off the car.

"You remember how I'm not with Mormonism, right? That's not the only... uh, thing that my parents are frustrated about with me."

"Okay?"

"I'm surprised you haven't noticed because Spencer sure has, I guess when I'm near you I'm more at peace but-"

"Bren,"

"I have ADHD, and to my parents it's the biggest fucking deal. I- it's been a whole lot better, but at the moment it's just getting a bit out of hand."

"Oh," Ryan shrugs, getting out of the car to open the door to Brendon, who turns a bit pink from the gesture. "Well, that changes nothing between us, and if you want to stay tonight you can. It is Friday after all," He winks.

"Please," Brendon smiles and hugs Ryan, leaning into him almost helplessly while Ryan's hand plays with the hair on the back of Brendon's neck.

Once they're inside the head straight to the couch, Lola greeting them brightly whilst she finishes cleaning the rest of the house.

"Anything you want to do?" Ryan asks, climbing into Brendon's lap, snuggling into him as Brendon wraps his arms around Ryan.

"Don't you have, like, people to hang out with?"

"I kind of been avoiding them for the last week if you haven't noticed," Ryan replies pointedly. "They want to but I said I'm with you."

Brendon smiles proudly, kissing Ryan and holding him tighter. "I feel too big for this," Ryan says.

"You weigh the equivalent of a feather. You're not moving, babe."

"Mm,"

They stay like that for a bit, watching silly cartoons until they here a knock on the door and the doorbell ring.

Ryan jumps up to answer it, seeing it being Spencer and Jon. "Jon!" Ryan practically yells excitedly, hugging him.

"Ry- where did you get this muscle?" Jon laughs as he releases him.

"'Sup Jon," Brendon smiles from behind Ryan.

"Hey Brendon! So you guys are like, together now? Finally, right Spencer?"

"Yup." He nods, stepping into the house.

"You owe me ten bucks." Jon adds.

"You bet on us?" Brendon asks, wrapping an arm around Ryan's waist.

"AW, yeah we did." Jon starts laughing again as Spencer pulls out a ten dollar bill.

"Anyway, we want to talk an idea over with you guys."

Ryan raises his eyebrows.

"What if we started a band!" Jon chirps excitedly. Ryan's eyes widen when Brendon doesn't even move.

"Um... what inspired this?" Ryan thinks outloud.

"Well we always played music together, you and me. You write lyrics, I play drums, Jon plays bass, then there is Brendon who does everythi-"

"Spencer..."

"Think about it Ryan! Brendon could sing; he sings during band all the time."

"That's for fun," Brendon adds.

"How cool would it be to be in a band though? Think about it."

Brendon and Ryan both consider it for a minute, Ryan's mind racing about his lyrics getting put out into songs, sharing basically his life story.

"That's so dumb." Ryan rolls his eyes.

"I'll do it if Ryan will." Brendon finally says.

Ryan stares at Brendon then at Spencer and Jon.

"Awesome!" Jon yells. "We are gonna have a band."


--

The rest of the night, Ryan takes everyone out to dinner and pays. He really did get a ton of money from his dad, he is set for life. Shit, he could be set for three lives.

"So, woah, wait. How much were you left with?!" Spencer squeaks across the table in shock.

"Apparently he had a lot of money from my past family members, who worked in oil and such."

"Holy shit."

"You still going to college?" Jon asks, seriously.

"Unless our band gets like, super famous." They laugh, "I still need an education, so yes."

Brendon's expression falls. Next year Ryan is going to be at college while he is stuck in school, which he dreads.

"I'll miss you," Brendon mumbles, leaning onto him. Ryan feels like he got hit with a brick.

"I guess we better get famous."

--

Brendon's tired expression holds as he crawls into bed with Ryan, snuggling up to him. "Can you... stay with me, all weekend?" Ryan whispers into Brendon's hair; taking him in his arms.

Being completely alone isn't new to Ryan, but knowing he will be- that his dad isn't coming home- is new. It's also terrifying. So, when Brendon's there, or even Lola, it's secure. "Please," He adds.

"Just sleep," Brendon mutters, kissing Ryan on the jaw and drifting off. Ryan is soon to follow him.

--

Uneasy noises escape from Ryan, along with thrashing under the sheets making Brendon's eyes fall open. "What the fuck, Ry?" Brendon turns to fall silent, looking at the sweat-covered boy shaking under the covers.

"No, no, no, no, NO," Ryan cries, still trapped in his dream, breathing harshly.

"Ryan?" Brendon tries to steady him, "Ryan, you're okay, wake up?"

Ryan's eyes fly open; tears streaming down his face as Brendon pulls him into a hug.

"You're okay, just a stupid nightmare."

"Y-you," Ryan sobs, resting his head on Brendon's shoulder, "died."

Brendon has a short intake of breath then sighs, "I'm not going anywhere."

Ryan pulls away, revealing his strained expression. "You don't know that,"

"Ryan,"

"My mom didn't plan on leaving ten years ago. She didn't plan on getting cancer. My Dad didn't plan on over doing it." Ryan sobs harder, making Brendon's shoulder covered in tears.

How the hell is Brendon supposed to respond to that one?

"I'm here right now. Whatever happens in the future doesn't matter. I'm here, okay?" Brendon responds carefully.

Ryan chooses not to respond and falls back onto the bed and Brendon follows. Brendon starts humming absently mindedly and breaks into a song, "Close your eyes and I'll kiss you," He kisses the tip of Ryan's stuffy nose, a grin forms on his face. "Tomorrow I'll miss you,"

He keeps it low and calm, fingers playing with the indent of Ryan's chest. "Remember I'll always be true,"

Ryan feels tears forming, just from being happy. Brendon kisses the side of his neck, "And then while I'm away, I'll write home everyday," His fingers trace the side of his cheek, "And send all my loving, to you."

"I love you," Ryan wimpers.

"I love you, too." Brendon kisses him on the lips sweetly. "Goodnight, babe."

--

The next morning is a bit of a blur, both of the boys having to work and deal with pesky teenagers who think they know what they are doing. For over an hour during the slow day, Brendon was going through Ryan's lyrics and singing them, figuring out the melody. It sounds great, Ryan admits.

Earl certainly picked up with the chemestry between Brendon and Ryan, noticing the smirks between them as they do different things.

"Ryan? Can I see you for a minute?" Earl calls from the office.

"Can you actually, I don't know, work?" Ryan swallows hard and nods. "So you're on register for the rest of the day." Ryan grunts tiredly and sits on his stool, awaiting for the next customer.

"Ryan got introuuuuble," Brendon sings as he walks past him, a box holding a bass in his arms.

"You're rather close yourself, Urie." Earl laughs.

Ryan feels like he is going to die just from being bored. Of course he is an over dramatic teenager but honestly this is the slowest day at work he has experienced in months.

"I'm so bored," Ryan voices, slumping his head on the counter and jokingly snores.

"Excuse me," A man's voice interrupts right in front of him.

It isn't just a man, but it's Pete Wentz. "Oh, um..." Ryan swallows. "How may I help you, sir?"

"I need some help reaching one of those basses," He points to one on the upper shelf, which is quite simple to Ryan to grab.

"Oh, yeah." Ryan blinks a few times, "Bren, I need your help over here."

"And I said ROMEO TAKE ME SOME-"

"BREN,"

"Yeah?"

"Help, um, Mr. Wentz over here."

"Who?" Brendon turns to see the shorter man in front of him. Well, for Brendon, that's only by a solid inch. "Wow, sir. Big fan, really."

"Thank you," Pete says shyly.

Ryan stands by the basses, curious as to which one to grab. "Which bass?"

"The red one, please."

"Good choice. Plays like a gem."

"Ryan, gems aren't instruments." Brendon teases.

"You just go back to sing your Taylor Swift and Queen, princess." Ryan laughs while he hands Pete the red fender.

Pete smirks. "You two are strange."

"We been around each other for a too many hours straight, at the moment." Ryan hands him a chord and turns on the amp.

"I know what that feels like. You play?" Pete asks, plucking at the strings. Ryan tries to stop staring.

"Uh, yeah. I play guitar, and Brendon over there plays everything and sings. Well, obviously. He's been singing to himself all day."

"And you are?"

"Ryan,"

"Well Ryan, that's pretty cool. I'll take this bass. It does play as good as you said."

"I would never lie about that," Ryan says, playing the bass in a gig bag and continuing with warranties.

"THE GROOMS BRIDE IS A WHOR-" Brendon sings, "'se. Horse." Face turning a bright red.

"Very good Brendon. Just how I wrote it." Ryan hands the bag over to Pete once he has finished the check out process. Pete just smiles and listens to Brendon sing the lyrics Ryan wrote for a minute before heading to the door.

"I won't be a stranger," Pete calls, exiting the store.

--

A/N SUPER SHORT. I'm sorry :( School and everything just makes me want to die, but I will start the next chapter soon. Maybe some makeup smut.

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