FicWad

Frank POV

Pacing wasn’t doing me any good, in fact it was just making me more agitated and tired. Giving up I slumped onto one of the moulded plastic chairs outside, cursing quietly under my breath as a sketchy looking bloke with black dishevelled hair eyed me up and down. Halting to a stop he turned on his heel and looked down at me, smiling.

‘Can I help you?’ I spat, his presence not helping my mood.

‘I think you can.’ He answered nodding, still fucking smiling.

‘Does the name Gerard Way ring a bell to you?’

Hesitating I swallowed and looked around wildly, wondering who the fuck this dude was and how he knew Gerard.

‘Y...yes.’ I spoke quietly, twiddling my thumbs nervously.

‘Brilliant. I’m a… friend of his; do you know which room he is staying in? I heard he had a…accident.’

I felt his piercing eyes burn the top of my head, his smirk clear in his voice. I automatically began to feel very uncomfortable and shuffled on the spot and then looked up shrugging my shoulders.

‘I… I have no idea. I’m waiting for someone.’ I lied through gritted teeth.

‘Right…Well when you see him could you inform him Mark was trying to get hold of him, it’s urgent. Tell him to ring me.’ The man ordered rudely, before clicking his fingers and walking away swiftly.

Feeling way too vulnerable I jumped up from my position and returned to pacing, then leaning on Gee’s door frame and exhaling shakily, closing my restless eyes.

I can’t work out how I feel.

It’s a cocktail of utter hatred and anger towards my ‘Dad’, but laced with this almost sadness that I actually haven’t got a family. Yeah fair enough the Way’s have welcomed me into their life, but their not mine, especially since there’s still tension lingering in the household between Mikey, Gee and I.

I think…I think I love Gerard. I mean I’m only young and I probably do not know the extent of love, but it’s much more than just liking him, we have a real connection, he’s saved me. I’ve never had anyone care for me so much in my life; certainly not anyone has special and captivatingly beautiful like Gerard.

But there’s something in the pit of my stomach…I’ve never felt it before in my life. Every time I look at his tragic face this weird emotion cascades through my body. It’s a mixture between fear, betrayal and…I don’t know, possibly guilt?

I know it’s not my fault that Gerard is in the state he is right now, but I can’t help thinking that if I never hesitated before walking into school on my first day, and never met Mikey, this wouldn’t have happened. Gerard could have been better if he didn’t meet me… No, he definitely would have been better.

It’s my entire fault.

My eyes started to readjust to the unusually bright artificial lights, and I tried to strain my ears so I could pick up snippets of the conversation Dr Threller and Gerard were having.

Why can’t Gee remember him?

I don’t think any one realizes the extent of his condition… I feel betrayed because he doesn’t talk to me, but I suppose I should have fucking worked it out…He is after all my boyfriend.

‘Gerard, talk to me, I’m here for you.’ I heard Dr Threller announce in an orderly way.

Oooh Gee will not like this, not one bit.

‘You can’t help.’ I heard Gerard snap, his stubborn voice icy.

‘Can you stop fucking writing shit down!’ I heard him shout aggressively.

I wish he would just let people help him…

‘Gerard be nice!’ I warned him through the door, rolling my eyes whilst doing so.

I heard him tut but the conversation seemed to flow from there, even though Gerard refused to converse with Dr Threller in any detail what so ever.

Sighing heavily, I slid down against the wall and sat on the immaculately clean tiled floors, rubbing my forehead with my hand then quickly nibbling my fingernails with frustration.

I was exhausted to say the least. I’ve been worried sick about him. I just wanted to hold him, kiss him gently and tell him he was going to make it, never let them take you alive Gee, the demons are not worth your time.

‘You’re just here to hurt me and Frankie!’ I suddenly heart Gerard shriek, his voice quivering and panic veiling his accusation.

‘Why do you think I’m going to hurt anyone Gerard?’ Dr Threller asked calmly.

Jeez this man is a god send; anyone else would have given up by now.

Silence filled his room, only the faint muffles of Gerard crying escaped. I really wanted to go in there but I needed to know why he would make such a statement.

I need to know what was going on.

‘Gerard, is it back?’ I heard Dr Threller asked soothingly, my worry increasing on what he meant.

‘Y…yes.’ Gee croaked back, my heart pounding near to breaking out my chest.

‘FUCK OFF LEAVE ME ALONE!.’ He suddenly screamed, causing a couple of nurses to exchange worried glances towards his room.

‘Gerard look at me. I can make them go away, I can help you get better, but you have to trust me.’

‘Make it stop! Make it go away! I want to be alone! Just kill me kill me right now otherwise I’ll do it myself, I swear to god I will!’ Gerard hysterically bawled.

I had to go in.

Twisting the door handle in a hurry I stumbled in upon Gee curled up in a tight ball on his bed, his hands clutching onto the pillow around his face as if he was going to be dragged away. Dr Threller stood up with the notes and smiled sympathetically at my horrified face.

‘He’s worse than I thought Frank. I think its best he stays over night again then goes home. It’s going to be a long recovery but I’m confident. He’s done it before and he can do it again.’ He said almost sounding like a promise, squeezing my shoulder slightly. ‘He’s a strong kid.’

‘Yeah, he is.’ I smiled sadly, avoiding eye contact with Threller.

‘I’ll leave you two alone, I’ll be back in a couple of days to access his mental state and then prescribe the best medication for him.’

I nodded slowly and ran a hand through my hair, Gee’s cries escalating and making me cover my mouth with my hand to stop me from crying too.

Dr Threller was about to walk out when I grasped his arm causing him to swivel round.

I needed to know what’s happening.

‘How do you know him?’ I whimpered, my question a small whisper.

‘He has been emitted to the hospital before with alcohol poisoning, along with other worrying traits like talking to someone aggressively or fearfully when no ones there. He was so dependant on taking narcotics and alcohol his memory didn’t have enough strength to recount his recovery or his relapse.’ Dr Threller looks at his notes and started tapping his pen rhythmically.

‘Frank I shouldn’t be telling you this but I think you deserve to know. Before he was emitted last time he tried to hurt his family in a drunken rage. He set the house on fire whilst his parents and Michael were still in there. Luckily no one was seriously hurt but it was one of the main courses of the divorce between their parents. We need to get him help before he attempts something like that again, he could really hurt someone’

And with that he ruffled my hair and walked out of the room.

I can’t believe it.

My beautiful perfect boy tried to kill his family?

It was all too much to take in.

Maybe he can’t be saved this time…

Mikey POV

‘Stop slouching Michael.’ Mom demanded, but then her face softened at my contorted expression.

‘Listen Mikey, I know you like Frank, but Gerard really likes him, I think they could save each other.’ She said with hope tinting her voice, smiling understandingly at my stricken face.

‘H-how do you k-know?!’ I shrieked, embarrassment of my sexuality making my cheeks tinge red.

‘Ahh come on Michael, I can tell by just the way you looked at him. It’s nothing to be ashamed of its part of growing up.’

Slightly relieved by her laid back attitude I leaned against my chair again, gnawing at my sore lips.

‘I don’t think I even like him anymore Mom. I think I’m jealous of what they have…’ I whispered weakly, bowing my head in shame.

‘Aren’t we all.’ She admitted, this time biting her own lip.

I looked up at her and she smiled at me, those really motherly smiles which tell you it’s going to be okay, it’s going to be alright.

She flung her arm around my shoulder and kissed my hair as I tilted my head onto hers, her blonde hair tickling my face.

‘You know Mikey; you have your whole life awaiting you. You’re a smart, handsome and talented young man, and one day, who knows when, but definitely one day you will fall in love with someone who feels the same back, and that will be that. It’s too late for me, I’m getting too ol-‘

‘Don’t you dare say old Mom!’ I warned her giggling, as she pushed me playfully.

‘Oh Michael, this is what you need to concentrate on, these little moments, because these are the memories you’ll keep forever, trust me. Don’t push Gerard away, he needs you and you need him, you two used to be so close, it breaks my heart too see you two falling apart…’ Her voice trembled on the last bit, which caused a pang of guilt to run through me.

She’s right.

Look what we’ve done to her.

Gerard is still the same person, inside he is, he just needs help pulling his own self back out of this shell he’s created.

We need to make amends and fast. I can’t afford to loose him and leave him on the thought I hated him.

Kissing my Mom on the cheek lovingly I unthreaded her arms from me and told her I was going to see Gerard. I wish I could have taken a picture of her face when I told her. It lit up, her eyes started to sparkle that fantastic blue again and her posture changed from rigid and insecure to almost pride in her son.

Flashing a grin I half ran half walked towards Gerard’s room. I stood at the bottom of the steps and then realised I had no idea what I was going to say.

I heard the elevator doors ping and open. I practically leaped into the small metal cage and pressed floor 3, whistling to the corny music playing.

‘Never thought I’d see you again.’ A familiar voice whispered into my ear, making me jump.

Turning round nervously I came face to face to the only person I thought I’ve never see.

Mark.

I leaned against the cold metal wall and fear paralyzed me, my face draining of all colour.

‘No need to look so shocked Mikes.’ He laughed menacingly.

The elevator doors suddenly opened and Mark swiftly grasped my shoulder tightly and steered me out, my vision blurry through brewing tears and a dizzy head.

‘Let’s take a walk.’ He barked at me, practically dragging me to an isolated rest room a little down the corridor.

Pushing me in fiercely I stumbled back struggling to catch my anxious unsteady breaths.

‘Okay kid where the fuck is Gerard?’ Mark growled, his empty grey eyes glaring at my cowering body.

‘I…I d-don’t k-know.’ I sputtered in desperation, making Mark suck in his cheeks and causing me to flinch.

‘Oh I think you do.’ He scorned, reaching into his pocket.

A silver edge caught the lights, shining dimly. He rested the sharp razor blade under my chin, making my throat contract in horror.

‘P-please, I have know I-idea.’ I said under my breath, stuttering.

This displeased Mark greatly as he snarled at my quivering face, anger making him tense up. Pulling his hand back slowly and steadily he raised the blade to the roof, laughing hysterically at me.

‘Lets face it Michael. Levi left you for Gerard and so has your precious Frankie. You have nothing to live for. Franks Dad and I are quite close you know, and before Levi died I promised him I would fucking kill Gerard and Frank. Poor ickle Frankie’s Dad tried, put Gerard is still alive so I’ll have to fucking do the job myself won’t I? It’s either you die now if you don’t tell me where the fuck they are or you go free and let them die.’ He darkly and coldly growled in my ear, the glinting blade catched my eye for a second.

This is it.

This is where I die.