FicWad

A year ago, I would have immediately labeled this dark and handsome man a daft drunkard for claiming ownership of the Black Pearl. But as any half-decent, learned pirate would know, there had indeed been multiple sightings of a ship flying black sails in the past months. It goes without saying that these sightings were accompanied by numerous tales and articles all on the account of...

"Jack Sparrow?" I asked, attempting not to sound as incredulous as I was.

"Captain Jack Sparrow, love," he grinned another gilded grin, his dusky, cloudy eyes staring at me with sinful intent.

I looked him up and down again. For some reason, his appearance seemed fitting. A popular moniker for the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow was "The Man Who Lived and Died a Thousand Deaths". Although it was just another ridiculous myth - probably started by the illustrious captain himself -, he certainly did look the part. Lively, spirited, lustful, and yet disheveled and sea worn, in his own roguish way. I had little to no doubt that this man was, in fact, who he claimed to be.

In light of the fact, I proceeded with caution. Though the prospect of becoming a crew member aboard the Black Pearl brought with it great fame and riches, so too was it wrought with danger, destruction, deceit, and above all: death.

"Don't tell me the captain of the most famous pirate ship in the Spanish Main has stopped in Tortuga just to indulge in the desires of the flesh," I said nonchalantly, taking a sip of my rum.

"Sticks and stones, love. There's never just one reason," he replied.

"Ah, but the simplest solution is usually the correct one," I countered.

"Touché," the captain conceded, taking a long sip of the crimson drink. "Tell me, darling, is your sword as sharp as your tongue?"

I nodded. "And twice as quick."

He grinned widely. "I do believe that you and I are going to get along famously." He drew out the last word, again inching closer to me.

"If it concerns you, Captain Jack Sparrow, I'm fairly sure the proper adjective would be infamously."

Sparrow sat back now, still smirking. "Your sword must be very sharp indeed."

"Tell me, Captain Sparrow, when do you leave port?" I inquired.

"Two days. I do hope you'll grant me your pleasurable company until and beyond that morn," he replied suggestively. I began to wonder if anything this man said was not laced with innuendo.

"Why, Captain Sparrow, I do believe you and I have quite different definitions of pleasure," I responded, though quite sure that a night with Jack Sparrow would not be entirely un-gratifying.

"Mathematics, love: it all stems from the same desire."

"Agriculture, captain: one stem is never identical to the next."

"So you're a pirate and a farmhand?" teased Sparrow.

I traced the rim of my glass with my finger before licking the liquid off and taunting in a sensual tone, "My abilities are limitless."

"Like the sea itself," the captain said in a husky voice. As much as I would have loved to continue this game of cat and mouse, I withdrew.

"I will consider your proposal of employment," I said stately, finishing off the last of the crimson liquid in my glass and sliding it towards the bartender. It never reached its destination, as some nameless drunk grabbed it and threw it against the wall. Only in Tortuga.

Captain Sparrow raised an eyebrow questioningly. I sighed. "Let me rephrase that. I will consider your proposal of employment under your jurisdiction as captain aboard the vessel the Black Pearl. I will not, however, consider your proposal of employment under the terms of sexual deviance and debauchery."

The captain seemed disappointed. "I suppose that'll do, love."

I gave the dark man a frank look. "Captain Jack Sparrow, I'd very much like to come to an understanding with you. In light of the fact that I am, as it happens, a woman, you'd do yourself well to overlook that distracting quality and take into account my skills of the cutlass surpass that of many pirates and most certainly any drunken sailor you could spy in this pub. Is that clear?"

He merely grinned. "As rum."

"You'd also do well to remember that agreement. Now, on the eve before your departure of Tortuga, I would like to arrange a meeting with you here."

"I take it I shall not be bedding you tonight then?" The captain frowned.

I smirked. "You've no better chance than you had ten minutes past."

Letting out a sigh, he said, "Very well, then I shall meet you here at said date." His eyes met mine, dancing playfully. "After all, distance does make the heart grow fonder."

I grinned, rising up from my stool and leaning precariously close to the captain. "My dear captain, what you desire has nothing to do with affairs of the heart," I whispered, before grabbing his bottle of rum and making my way towards the door, conceiving quite the spectacle of swinging my hips just so.

*

Still seated on his stool, watching the sensual sway of the mystery woman's waltz, Captain Jack Sparrow came to the conclusion that whenever a woman was involved, in the end, the rum was always gone.