Categories > Celebrities > Guns n' Roses > Axl Preggers?
Powder n' Cranberries
Slash woke up the next morning with a start. In a cold sweat. He only vaguely recalled his dreams, but remembered being pursued by Izzy. Just his face! A very BIG FACE!
Izzy's face was as huge as the sun, and just as hot! It pursued Slash over bridges, under bridges, over hills, through valleys, and through thick forests. It simply melted away the trees or anything that might hide Slash from his wrath, and chased him nonstop! Fear shot up Slash's spine! Slash awoke terrified with his spine tingling,and he was trembling and wet!
After a shower, he headed out to his panhandling job for the day. Nothing but nothing would stop him from proceeding forward with his plans when he got back. He promised this to himself as he closed the door shut.
Later
Slash returned with a huge supply of cranberries, just in case anything went amiss. (He even hid an extra bag in his jacket!) Slash had to briefly explain to his friend why he needed so many! He'd have to do another favor, maybe another day of work. They'd work it out. Half of them went in to storage in the refrigerator right away. The other half he washed. This time Slash kept watch, keeping an eye out for anything that might interfere with him. Nothing happened. He finished his cranberries without incident; and again watching around carefully, he juiced them. He then poured himself a big satisfying glass to taste what he'd created. Perfect. He then poured Axl a glass, and headed straight to his room. ' This almost seems too easy', Slash thought worriedly. As he got closer he noticed Axl's door slightly ajar. He knocked, and then gently pushed it open. Axl was nowhere! Not even in his bathroom smoking a cigarette. Slash searched every nook and cranny of the whole building, only to find out from Duff that Axl had gone to Vicki's. '!!@#@#$%!’, thought Slash.
Soon, however, Axl returned. But not how Slash wanted. He was with Erin! Axl and Erin sat across from each other in the lobby on two facing sofa's, holding hands, talking quietly. Slash began to seethe. Slash collected himself around the corner, and then he approached them. "Hi Slash!" they both said simultaneously. "Guess what, it looks like Axl and I will be getting back together again." Announced Erin. But Slash speechlessly searched Axl. The betrayal left him searching for words. Axl noticing Slash's distraught face, quickly added, "After the band gets more road time, not right away." He said winking at Slash. Axl and Erin continued their talk. Slash offered to get both of them drinks; they seemed barely able to hear him.
Slash sifted the powder up in his room, placed some in a sandwich bag, and put it in his pocket. Slash realized that his time was running out. If he was going to hook Axl, it better be soon. If he didn't, he might lose Axl to......Erin. Axl and Erin WERE getting closer, no matter what Axl tried saying! Slash went down the hall to the kitchen, and poured two glasses of cranberry juice. Suddenly Axl and Erin burst into the kitchen, Axl holding Erin by her bosom and lightly tickling her. Erin was giggling. "What's that?" Asked Erin excitedly. "Just some juice. Cranberry juice." Answered Slash. "Oooo that looks good," said Erin reaching for a glass. "So that’s what you did with them cranberries,” said Axl taking the other glass. They toasted each other, and then drank staring at one another. It seemed they forgot Slash was even in the room. 'Drink, that’s right Axl, drink baby.' Thought Slash darkly. As soon as they'd finished their glasses, they locked in a kiss.
Slash just stood there and watched; half stunned, half incensed, and... partly turned on at watching Axl make out. They slowly went to the floor as they made out right in front of Slash, dropping their glasses as they went. The glasses somehow didn't break. Slash wondered 'Hmmm, This must be some kind of revenge, but for what? Why is Axl trying to make me jealous? Why? Or is he trying to turn me on?’ More Confusion with Axl, mixed messages, as usual. Slash suddenly decided he didn't want to stay for the rest, so he quickly exited the kitchen, only to collide into Izzy! While Slash was jolted, stumbling to the ground, Izzy stood as solid as a statue with a hostile, determined look in his eye. It was as if Izzy expected to run into Slash. "Not staying for the show, Why?" Izzy asked coldly. "F--ckin Spying again, Izzy?!" Slash retorted, rubbing his sore head. Suddenly compassion entered Izzy's cold eyes. He helped Slash back up. "Just be careful where you're going next time. And don't miss tonight's practice like you've done these past days. “Izzy said with a sly look as he walked off down the hall. One rarely knew what was in Izzy's head; but it always seemed to be busy...
Later, Slash had the opportunity to add the first two doses of powder to Axl's drinking water, and then to some lemonade, while Axl and Erin sat in the tub and had run out of wine.
The Week
The rest of the week seemed to go without incident. Slash's cranberry juice was very popular; a real hit with the band. The new juice- a - holics, consumed much more than anticipated, and they pleaded with Slash to make more. Some came up with interesting cocktail mixes, particularly Steven and Izzy, which included the cranberry juice. Most importantly Axl consumed much more than his 8 oz. per day, no effort from Slash. The powder however took more work; this is the rundown of how Slash administered powder the remainder of week,
Second day- Slash was able to get the two doses to axl by way of buttered rice, and later glass of water.
Third day- A glass of water; later a glass of lemonade
Fourth day- The band performed a gig, Slash got the powder in two different glasses of water.
Fifth day- cheese pasta, powdered and hand delivered by Slash. Later at a gig, Slash spiked a glass of water for Axl.
Sixth day- Glass of water, glass of lemonade
Seventh day- Buttered rice, glass of water.
Slash was cautioned by his supplier that there are often symptoms even without actual pregnancy. He'd need to either get Axl to the hospital for confirmation, or somehow sample Axl's urine with a pregnancy kit.
During that first crucial six hours, Slash struggled to penetrate Axl because Axl wanted to take him orally. That was all Axl was in the mood for. But with some convincing, some stimulation, and sweet talk; finally Slash managed to knock Axl up in the last hour, the sixth hour. But Slash needed to 'sperm' Axl as often as he could for the rest of that day and the next two days, to insure conception. He had succeeded towards the afternoon of that seventh day as Axl had gotten in the mood and they were going at it pretty much the rest of the day.
But on the eight day, Slash suffered a huge setback. After a morning gig, Axl and Erin had a huge fight! It lasted several hours. The farthest Slash could get with Axl that day was dryly making out on the sofa!
The ninth day Slash had to struggle again because the previous day still had Axl left in a sour mood, due to his bipolar. At first Slash tried being very sweet to Axl, which was easy for Slash to do. Though there was confusion and conflict, he still loved his Axl very much and couldn’t see life without him. Since they were all late sleepers; in the afternoon Slash made Axl a nice breakfast of Eggs, blueberry pancakes, bacon, orange slices, and of course, cranberry juice. (All this thanks to Slash's panhandling job.) Axl accepted the breakfast, but refused Slash's advances....
But the day was still young.....
Slash woke up the next morning with a start. In a cold sweat. He only vaguely recalled his dreams, but remembered being pursued by Izzy. Just his face! A very BIG FACE!
Izzy's face was as huge as the sun, and just as hot! It pursued Slash over bridges, under bridges, over hills, through valleys, and through thick forests. It simply melted away the trees or anything that might hide Slash from his wrath, and chased him nonstop! Fear shot up Slash's spine! Slash awoke terrified with his spine tingling,and he was trembling and wet!
After a shower, he headed out to his panhandling job for the day. Nothing but nothing would stop him from proceeding forward with his plans when he got back. He promised this to himself as he closed the door shut.
Later
Slash returned with a huge supply of cranberries, just in case anything went amiss. (He even hid an extra bag in his jacket!) Slash had to briefly explain to his friend why he needed so many! He'd have to do another favor, maybe another day of work. They'd work it out. Half of them went in to storage in the refrigerator right away. The other half he washed. This time Slash kept watch, keeping an eye out for anything that might interfere with him. Nothing happened. He finished his cranberries without incident; and again watching around carefully, he juiced them. He then poured himself a big satisfying glass to taste what he'd created. Perfect. He then poured Axl a glass, and headed straight to his room. ' This almost seems too easy', Slash thought worriedly. As he got closer he noticed Axl's door slightly ajar. He knocked, and then gently pushed it open. Axl was nowhere! Not even in his bathroom smoking a cigarette. Slash searched every nook and cranny of the whole building, only to find out from Duff that Axl had gone to Vicki's. '!!@#@#$%!’, thought Slash.
Soon, however, Axl returned. But not how Slash wanted. He was with Erin! Axl and Erin sat across from each other in the lobby on two facing sofa's, holding hands, talking quietly. Slash began to seethe. Slash collected himself around the corner, and then he approached them. "Hi Slash!" they both said simultaneously. "Guess what, it looks like Axl and I will be getting back together again." Announced Erin. But Slash speechlessly searched Axl. The betrayal left him searching for words. Axl noticing Slash's distraught face, quickly added, "After the band gets more road time, not right away." He said winking at Slash. Axl and Erin continued their talk. Slash offered to get both of them drinks; they seemed barely able to hear him.
Slash sifted the powder up in his room, placed some in a sandwich bag, and put it in his pocket. Slash realized that his time was running out. If he was going to hook Axl, it better be soon. If he didn't, he might lose Axl to......Erin. Axl and Erin WERE getting closer, no matter what Axl tried saying! Slash went down the hall to the kitchen, and poured two glasses of cranberry juice. Suddenly Axl and Erin burst into the kitchen, Axl holding Erin by her bosom and lightly tickling her. Erin was giggling. "What's that?" Asked Erin excitedly. "Just some juice. Cranberry juice." Answered Slash. "Oooo that looks good," said Erin reaching for a glass. "So that’s what you did with them cranberries,” said Axl taking the other glass. They toasted each other, and then drank staring at one another. It seemed they forgot Slash was even in the room. 'Drink, that’s right Axl, drink baby.' Thought Slash darkly. As soon as they'd finished their glasses, they locked in a kiss.
Slash just stood there and watched; half stunned, half incensed, and... partly turned on at watching Axl make out. They slowly went to the floor as they made out right in front of Slash, dropping their glasses as they went. The glasses somehow didn't break. Slash wondered 'Hmmm, This must be some kind of revenge, but for what? Why is Axl trying to make me jealous? Why? Or is he trying to turn me on?’ More Confusion with Axl, mixed messages, as usual. Slash suddenly decided he didn't want to stay for the rest, so he quickly exited the kitchen, only to collide into Izzy! While Slash was jolted, stumbling to the ground, Izzy stood as solid as a statue with a hostile, determined look in his eye. It was as if Izzy expected to run into Slash. "Not staying for the show, Why?" Izzy asked coldly. "F--ckin Spying again, Izzy?!" Slash retorted, rubbing his sore head. Suddenly compassion entered Izzy's cold eyes. He helped Slash back up. "Just be careful where you're going next time. And don't miss tonight's practice like you've done these past days. “Izzy said with a sly look as he walked off down the hall. One rarely knew what was in Izzy's head; but it always seemed to be busy...
Later, Slash had the opportunity to add the first two doses of powder to Axl's drinking water, and then to some lemonade, while Axl and Erin sat in the tub and had run out of wine.
The Week
The rest of the week seemed to go without incident. Slash's cranberry juice was very popular; a real hit with the band. The new juice- a - holics, consumed much more than anticipated, and they pleaded with Slash to make more. Some came up with interesting cocktail mixes, particularly Steven and Izzy, which included the cranberry juice. Most importantly Axl consumed much more than his 8 oz. per day, no effort from Slash. The powder however took more work; this is the rundown of how Slash administered powder the remainder of week,
Second day- Slash was able to get the two doses to axl by way of buttered rice, and later glass of water.
Third day- A glass of water; later a glass of lemonade
Fourth day- The band performed a gig, Slash got the powder in two different glasses of water.
Fifth day- cheese pasta, powdered and hand delivered by Slash. Later at a gig, Slash spiked a glass of water for Axl.
Sixth day- Glass of water, glass of lemonade
Seventh day- Buttered rice, glass of water.
Slash was cautioned by his supplier that there are often symptoms even without actual pregnancy. He'd need to either get Axl to the hospital for confirmation, or somehow sample Axl's urine with a pregnancy kit.
During that first crucial six hours, Slash struggled to penetrate Axl because Axl wanted to take him orally. That was all Axl was in the mood for. But with some convincing, some stimulation, and sweet talk; finally Slash managed to knock Axl up in the last hour, the sixth hour. But Slash needed to 'sperm' Axl as often as he could for the rest of that day and the next two days, to insure conception. He had succeeded towards the afternoon of that seventh day as Axl had gotten in the mood and they were going at it pretty much the rest of the day.
But on the eight day, Slash suffered a huge setback. After a morning gig, Axl and Erin had a huge fight! It lasted several hours. The farthest Slash could get with Axl that day was dryly making out on the sofa!
The ninth day Slash had to struggle again because the previous day still had Axl left in a sour mood, due to his bipolar. At first Slash tried being very sweet to Axl, which was easy for Slash to do. Though there was confusion and conflict, he still loved his Axl very much and couldn’t see life without him. Since they were all late sleepers; in the afternoon Slash made Axl a nice breakfast of Eggs, blueberry pancakes, bacon, orange slices, and of course, cranberry juice. (All this thanks to Slash's panhandling job.) Axl accepted the breakfast, but refused Slash's advances....
But the day was still young.....
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