Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The Living Sin

The biggest demon of all is...lonliness

by FightingForever 4 reviews

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: G - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way,Ray Toro - Published: 2013-07-05 - 1725 words

The steam coming from the hot water of the shower engulfed the bathroom, like a thick fog filling the small space. Frank let the water soothe his tense muscles and run down his bruised skin, making him relax against the tiled wall of the cubicle. Eventually he switched off the faucet and stepped out, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around his tiny waist.

He stepped to the mirror and swiped his hand across it, smearing the vapour from the glass to get a better view of himself. He traced a finger down the cut on his cheek and cautiously prodded at the bruising around his eye. The young man sighed before turning away to inspect his body, he noticed a few nasty bruises and minor cuts but nothing serious. The most prominent thing he saw was his rib and hip bones, jutting out so much he looked almost skeletal. Before Frank encountered his father he didn't care for life, lonliness was killing him from within and he never bothered to take care of himself. He wouldn't eat, deciding there was no point, and lacked any real fight to remain alive. Now that he had to do just that, he treasured his time on earth. And he wouldn't let anyone take it away from him.

Wincing slightly Frank bent down to pull his jogging pants over his legs. Once up he listened at the door to make sure there wad no sound indicating anyone was awake before exiting the bathroom. In his haste to get to the shower he had forgotten to bring a shirt and didn't want anyone to see how thin he had gotten. Slowly he left the bathroom and made his way down the stairs, sneaking into the dark living room. He squinted his eyes to look around for his bag and having no luck hit the switch on the lamp. Frank jumped and attempted to cover himself with his arms as a sleeping Gerard woke up startled by the sudden invasion of light illuminating the room. It was too late, Gerard had saw what Frank truly looked like.

"Frank..." the younger man ignored the older and began rummaging around for his bag. He felt angry, not at Gerard but the fact he had seen him.


"Why aren't you in bed? You should be resting"

"Don't you change the subject on me! How the hell are you so thin?" Frank jumped back startled by Gerard's tone of voice. He didn't need this right now and suddenly he was overcome with emotion, tears springing to his wide eyes. Gerard saw this and stepped forward, softening his voice, noticing Frank's true fragility. He realised this was the first time he had seen what Frank really looked like, he only thought he was quite thin from seeing him in the dark, not so...broken

"Frank...are..are you ill?" Frank shook his head and sat down slowly on the sofa, curling his legs up to his chest

"No...I...I just didn't eat very much, I didn't see the point..."

"But..why? Frankie you have so much to live for, you just don't know it yet. There's places to see, things to do. Your life is worth living..."

"I know that now, I do. I guess it took facing my own fucking mortality to realise that, you just don't understand Gerard"

"Then tell me Frank! How am I supposed to understand if you don't tell me?" Gerard took Frank's hands and lifted his chin to look in his eyes, softly wiping an escaped tear rolling down the younger's cheek with his thumb "please?" Frank took in a shuddering breath and pulled his gaze up toward the ceiling, avoiding Gerard's eyes

"The lonliness, forever being alone. No friends, no family, walking around like a shadow. Always there but rarely seen. It eats away at you, destroying your soul and making you empty. Nothing can fill that void, what's the point in living if you can't share it with anyone? I didn't bother taking care of myself because that's what those who live do, I didn't live, I existed...nothing more"

Gerard pulled Frank into a gentle embrace, as if he were a fragile treasure that needed tender care. He allowed Frank to break down, to sob into his shoulder as he let out the years of pain he had suffered. It was then that Gerard realised Frank had been fighting demons all his life, the demons inside his mind.

Eventually Frank pulled away, raising his tear filled gaze to meet Gerard's, their faces only inches apart. Frank could feel the older man's warm breath on his face and remembered the feeling of safety and hope he felt in the chamber of the succubus. Gerard licked his lips, his gaze flickering between Frank's eyes and lips. He so desperately wanted to capture the younger man's lips in his own, to taste him even for just a second but his head screamed at him not to. The boy had been through too much.

"I..I should bed" Gerard stuttered as he stood up "you should get some rest..."

Frank nodded and moved to find his bag, he located it and pulled out a shirt before slipping it on. He turned to find Gerard had gone and sighed, he missed his chance. Frank rubbed his hands over his face and walked through to the kitchen, fishing a glass out of the cupboard and filling it with water. He stood, sipping from it, as he gazed at his reflection in the window. He would get better and he would win this battle, living was too good an opportunity to miss and now that he had Gerard back in his life, he was no longer alone. He chugged the last of the water back and smiled as he wiped away the moisture left on his lips.

Frank stretched and turned to walk back into the front room, colliding with someone in the doorway. He stepped back to find Gerard there rubbing his chest where Frank had crashed into him. He smiled sheepishly and scooted around Frank mumbling about being thirsty and needing a drink, the younger man simply nodding his head in acknowledgment and wandering back into the front room.

He listened quietly as Gerard pottered about the kitchen, he couldn't sleep knowing Gerard was just in the other room. Finally he heard the light being switched off and Gerard wander through from the kitchen

"Gerard, wait" Frank quickly got up and moved toward the older man, he stood in front of him and reached up on his tip toes to Gerard's ear he whispered a soft "Thank you..." before planting a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth and dropping down onto his feet. Gerard stood gazing at the younger man for a moment, his heart arguing with his head. He couldn't take anymore, Frank's eyes were burning into him and he just couldn't take it

"Fuck it!" He groaned and pulled Frank closer to him, crashing their lips together and moving them fast and furiously. All the pent up tension from their moment spilling over as their lips moved together. Frank wrapped his arms around the olders neck, running a hand into his hair. Gerard scooped him up and carried him through to the front room, dropping backward onto the sofa so Frank was straddling his thighs. He moved his arms around the youngers back to pull him tighter to him and eagerly opened his mouth to let Frank's tongue snake inside.

As the kiss got more heated it became clumsy and sloppy but in that moment neither man cared, Frank wasn't exactly a virgin. He had had sex and certainly kissed people before but it had always been a drunken fumble and never felt anything like this. This was electric, he could feel every nerve in his body pulsating and burning with desire for Gerard, he never wanted it to end. He felt as though he finally found where he belonged. He belonged with Gerard.

The older man pulled away and rested his forehead against Frank's, he had never known a feeling like this before. It was euphoria and desperation all at once. He knew now that Frank was back in his life things would never be the same, it was fate he just knew it. Gerard tenderly pressed his lips to Franks once more as he moved their bodies to lay Frank down. He slowly stood up detatching himself from the younger and pulling a blanket over him.

"Go to sleep Frankie, I'll see you in the morning" he turned to walk away but a hand wrapping around his wrist stopped him in his tracks

"Stay with me...just until I fall asleep...please" Gerard looked into Frank's pleading eyes and nodded, climbing onto the couch so he was laying behind the younger man. He placed his arm over Frank and laced their fingers together, placing a small kiss on the back of his neck "Sleep Frankie"

Gerard tried to pull himself away from the sleeping man but his heart wanted to remain close to Frank and he just couldn't deny himself. Instead he reached over and switched off the lamp, snuggling back down and allowing sleep to take over.


The next morning Mikey walked down the stairs chatting to Ray, they turned to enter the front room and stopped at the sight before them. Frank had turned over during the night and he and Gerard were pressed tightly together. One of the younger mans hands had found its way to resting on Gerard's cheek and their foreheads were touching. The olders arms wrapped around him.

Ray looked at the two sleeping men and turned to Mikey with wide eyes "How did you know?" Mikey sighed and turned toward the kitchen, muttering something as he went. Ray reached out and grabbed his arm ""

"Because I saw it Ray...I saw it happen..."

What has Mikey been been hiding? The next chapter will be up either later or tomorrow. I know this was short and stuff but I have been ill in the past few days. Before I forget, well done to chemical_30 for successfully auditioning for a part in this. Please rate and review if you have time. Thanks xoxo
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