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Life is Like T-Rex

by: slincoln

Disclaimer: The characters from Harry Potter belong to JK Rowling and are used here without permission. The story image is property of Jenny Owen Youngs and is also reproduced without permission. Story concept based on How I Met Your Mother by Carter Bays and Craig Thomas.

"Not trying to make you think this is some kind of great big deal
I just know exactly how you feel
I could be the thing you reach for in the middle of the night Let me be the one to treat you right."-Last Person, Jenny Owen Youngs

Chapter Two: The Premature Proposal

****

"What on earth possessed you to ask that?" Hermione demanded.

"I don't know," I replied. "It was...the two of you, and her, the drink, the moment." I sighed. "I am a colossal idiot."

"What did you do after that?" Ron asked.

"I left! What else could I do?"

"Oh Harry," groaned Hermione.

"I panicked."

"You have to go and talk to her," Hermione insisted.

"But what do I say?"

"Say that you don't want to marry her for starters," Ron suggested. "You don't right?"

"I, er, don't know, maybe? When I said it, it seemed...right, y'know? Like that was how it was supposed to be."

"Well don't tell her that mate!"

"Harry, you need to go deal with this. Ginny is going to be involved in the wedding and you won't be able to avoid her," Hermione told me.

"I know, I'll patch things up with her somehow."

The sound of the front door closing interrupted our conversation. "Hello?" Ginny called out. "Are you home Harry?"

"Better think of something to say quick Harry," Hermione warned me. "He's in the kitchen Ginny," she called out.

Your mum stuck her head into the kitchen, "Harry, can I talk to you...in private," she added. I nodded and followed her into the sitting room. I closed the door behind us and cast a Silencing Charm on the room. "Are you sure that's a good idea?" She asked. "What if you have to call for help?"

"I can take care of myself," I said with a shrug. "Besides, I probably have it coming."

"I'll say, what possessed you to ask me that?"

I sunk into an easy chair. "I don't know, it just...popped out."

"And did you mean it? It wasn't just because of all the Firewhisky you'd had to drink."

"No, it wasn't just because of the drink, and yes I think I meant it."

Ginny raised her eyebrows, "You think? This isn't the sort of question you ask lightly Harry. You'd better mean it."

"Well, it's not something that I've spent a great deal of time thinking about!" I shot back. "But it...I don't know, felt right when I asked."

Ginny sighed in frustration, "Damn Ron for putting the thought in your head. I'll have you know you just made an eleven year old Ginny Weasley very happy."

I felt a smile being to form on my face. "And what about the twenty-one year old Ginny Weasley?"

"Oh she still says no, and I will hex you if you ask again."

"Don't worry, I won't." I took a deep sigh. "I understand where you're coming from by the way. You need to focus on your Quidditch. I respect that."

"It's not the Quidditch Harry, that's hardly even a concern."

"Then what..."

"How about the fact that you broke up with me, we barely talk for five years, five! And then, when we're in the middle of our first meaningful conversation since practically Dumbledore's funeral you propose to me! Can't you see how that might hack me off just a little?"

"Oh right, yeah, I can see that, and I'm sorry for the whole thing."

"It's not your fault that you're a complete git."

"That sounds like something that would be completely my fault."

"I suppose, but I don't hold it against you," Ginny fell silent. "For what it's worth, I agree with the other thing you said last night."

"Which was?"

"I miss having you around, being mates, hanging out," she confessed. "I know this is asking a lot of you, but could we go back to that?"

Now kids, everyone who's ever known me will tell you that what I said next was a baldfaced lie, but I assure you, it was the absolute truth. "Of course, I'd like that a lot."

"And you're not just saying that so you can hang around me in the hope I 'come around' or some such rot."

I stood up and grabbed Ginny by the shoulders, "Ginny look, we were friends. I miss my friend, I want to be your friend again, no strings attached. Is that enough?"

"I can live with that." Your mum slipped her arms around me and gave me a quick hug.

"So friend, would you like some breakfast? Kreecher would love to make you something."

"That sounds lovely, but unfortunately I can't, the Harpies are having a promotional event at the St. Mungo's Children's Ward and I can't miss that, obviously. But I wanted to settle things with you first."

"Well, they're settled." Just as an aside, they weren't and we were headed towards the biggest fight your mum and I have ever, and will ever have, but I'll get to that latter. "However, I do have one question for you." Ginny cocked an eyebrow threateningly. "No, not that. It's just, hypothetically, do you ever see us get back to where we were, y'know, before?"

"I should hex you for asking me that, it's as bad as the other question. You got me back as a friend Harry, don't push your luck." She stepped away from me and walked over to the sitting room door. "And to answer your question honestly...I don't know Harry, we'll just have to wait and see." Your mum now says this was an abject lie by the way.

"I'll send you an owl about maybe getting dinner or something this week. You know, to catch up."

"I'd like that." Your mum opened the sitting room door and found Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron standing there. "Merlin Ron, you look terrible, you need to clean yourself up if you're going to visit mum today."

"Why would I be visiting the Burrow?"

"Oh I can't imagine why, make any big life changing decisions lately?"

Ron sighed, "Oh bloody hell, you're right. We'll go pay them a visit today," he promised his sister.

"You better, congratulations again. And if you need anything from me Hermione, just ask." She turned and left the house.

"Well you're in one piece," Hermione noted as she and Ron entered the room and sat down on the sofa.

"I'm fine, we're fine, we're friends," I told them as I sunk back into the easy chair.

"Are you sure?"

"Hermione I'm fine, we're friends," I repeated. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to have breakfast then visit with my godson."

****

Later that day I was back at Grimmauld Place eating dinner after a long day of running after Teddy. Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron were still off visiting with your grandparents so I had the house to myself. My meal was interrupted by a tapping on the dining room window. I opened the window and an owl flew in and dropped a letter next to my place at the table. I picked up the envelope and saw that it was from your mum.

"Fancy a drink at the Cauldron with me tonight, around eight?" the note read. I chuckled at Ginny's presumption, wrote my reply and handed it to the owl, who promptly flew off. A short while later the front door banging open alterted me to your aunt and uncle's return.

"We're not here for long," Hermione called out, "Just stopping by before we break the news to my parents."

I stepped into the hall and saw that your uncle looked especially queasy. "Cheer up Ron, at least Hermione's father can't hex you."

"No, but he has power tools, and unlike my dad, his work!" Ron exclaimed.

"Get a grip Ron, my parents like you," Hermione huffed.

"Still doesn't make it easy," Ron grumbled.

"Choose your next words very carefully Ron, if you say any bollocks about asking my father for his permission to marry me..." she let the rest of the threat hang in the air unsaid.

"But it's what a bloke's supposed to do," Ron protested.

"It's archaic and patriarchal. I am not my father's property," Hermione fumed.

"I never said you were."

"We'll finish this discussion later, right now though we're late for dinner," She said to Ron before storming back out of the house.

"Welcome to the rest of your life mate," I told Ron with a chuckle.

"Oh sure, laugh it up now Harry, we'll see how you like it when the shoe's on the other foot." No, I'm not sure even Ron entirely knew what he meant by that. "Besides, Hermione likes it, says it keeps her sharp when she has to debate stuff at the Ministry."

"The two of you are seriously disturbed, you know that right?"

"And that's why you have us around, talk to you later Harry," Ron said with a wave. I returned the wave and watched your uncle walk out of the room.

I went into my home office and got caught up on paperwork until it was time to meet Ginny at the Leaky Cauldron. I had no idea why she wanted to meet up again, three times in two days after years of relative silence was a little disconcerting, but I certainly wasn't complaining.

As the clock approached eight I walked out of the house and Apparated to the Leaky Cauldron. When I entered the pub I caught Hannah's eye and she nodded towards the back of the room. I nodded in thanks and indicated that I'd like a glass of my usual before making my way to the table tucked into a dark corner that your mum was sitting at.

"So you just can't get enough of me is that it?" I asked as I slid into the seat across from her.

"Oh stop it Harry. I wanted to go out for a quick drink and I hate to do that alone. Plus this way you can tell me where you're taking me for dinner."

Before I could answer Hannah delivered my Firewhisky then left without saying a word, but the smile on her face said everything. "I will Obliviate her," I muttered.

"Don't start, Hannah's good people, she won't run to the press."

"I know, I know, the old DA has to stick together. Still all the knowing looks get on my nerves after a while."

"Just think of what will happen the minute one tabloid photographer sees us."

"I try not to," I replied.

"It's not like I have it easy either," Ginny pointed out. "Not that I'm comparing the two of us mind."

"I know you weren't, but still the love life of Ms. Golden Broom is pretty newsworthy."

"So what you're saying is that you're taking me to a Muggle restaurant."

"Now hold on a minute, which one of us is making the big professional Quidditch money, and which one is getting by on a Ministry salary?"

"Oh please, I know all about that vault in Gringotts."

"You know that's vastly overstated right?"

"Did you or did you not buy yourself a new Firebolt to replace the one you lost?"

"I did."

"And did that put any sort of dent in your savings?"

"Not really," I allowed, "But still, compared to the Malfoys…"

"Harry, do you seriously think you can win me over by making me pay for my dinner?"

"Who said I was trying to win you over? I'm just reconnecting with an old friend like I promised."

For a brief moment I thought I saw a look of disappointment flash across Ginny's face. "Still, you owe me some dinners. It's the least you can do."

I held up my hands in defeat, "Fair enough. So what's your fancy?" We then spent the next while debating the merits of restaurants we both knew and trying to get our schedules lined up. Eventually we settled on a moderately posh Italian restaurant that I was familiar with.

"Alright, I'll see you Wednesday then?" Ginny said as she finished off her drink.

"I'm looking forward to it," I told her.

"Harry," Your mum warned. "Don't get your hopes up, this is just two friends getting reacquainted, that's it. If some bloke comes along tomorrow and sweeps me off my feet that's that."

I drained the last of my firewhisky and stared at your mum. "If you can find somebody better than me I'll officiate the wedding for you." Kids this is why drinking firewhisky is bad, and you should never do it.

Ginny glared at me for a long moment, and I silently readied my defensive wards. Fortunately for me she then laughed. "Merlin, a Harry Potter who knows his own self worth. Trust me Harry, if you'd said that to any other witch you'd be in her knickers by now."

"And why's that?"

"Because it's true, you are hard to top," she said quietly. We lapsed into awkward silence as I digested this revelation. "However, I'm not most witches."

"So you're resistant to my charms?"

"Something like that, yeah."

"Well there's one thing you're right about."

"What's that?"

"You're not most witches."

A blush crept up your mother's face. "Goodnight Harry. I'll see you Wednesday," she said firmly before standing up from the table.

"Goodnight Ginny," I said with a chuckle and watched as she walked out of the Cauldron. I then stood and made my way back home.

****

By the time I got back to Grimmauld Place your aunt and uncle had returned from their visit with the Grangers and were sitting in the drawing room. They had identical stunned expressions on their faces. An open bottle of Scotch sat on the end table between them and they were both holding filled tumblers, though neither were drinking.

I walked over and poured myself a glass. "So how was your day?" I asked as I settled into a chair.

"It just hit us," Ron started to say.

"We're getting married," Hermione finished.

"A wedding."

"The people."

"The planning."

"Your mother."

"Your mother."

"Kids," Hermione said blankly. She and Ron stared at each other then took deep drinks.

"Having second thoughts?"

"No, of course not, it's just when you start to think it all gets…"

"Overwhelming."

"And just think, you haven't even picked out a date yet!" I said, my voice filled with false enthusiasm.

"Don't remind me," groaned Hermione. "It was the first thing my mum asked."

"Mine wanted to know if we were having the wedding at The Burrow…except it wasn't a question."

"If I get through this without hexing someone it will be a minor miracle," Hermione declared.

"At least your reception won't be interrupted by a Death Eater coup," I offered.

"Harry I love you, but if you offer anymore encouragement like that you will be the first person I jinx," Hermione growled at me. "And where were you this evening?

Internally I cursed Hermione for turning the tables on me. "I was having a drink with Ginny at the Leaky Cauldron," I admitted.

Ron's eyebrows shot up. "Again with Ginny? Is something going on there?"

"No, we just decided when she came over this morning that we should get dinner to, y'know, get reacquainted. So we were working out the details. We're not going to be able to avoid each other with this wedding of yours."

"Yeah but mate we all know you're still hard up over her, and don't object, you bloody well proposed to her last night."

"And Ginny…" Hermione started to say, then cut herself off.

"What, what about Ginny?"

"I know for a fact that the time the two of you dated was the happiest she's ever been, except for making the Harpies of course."

"And me breaking up with her upset her badly, Ron's made that point abundantly clear to me over the years."

Hermione snorted, "Really, you're going to trust Ron for insight into how Ginny feels?"

"She is my baby sister you know," protested Ron.

"Precisely you have a better understanding of the inner mind of a dementor."

"What's your point Hermione?" I asked quickly to head off the impending argument.

She took a deep breath. "The point is I love the both of you dearly, and I don't want to see either of you get hurt again, because let's face it, you are you Harry."

"And what is that supposed to mean?" I demanded.

Hermione and Ron glanced at each other before Hermione continued. "Well let's be fair Harry, you haven't exactly had the best luck when it comes to dating." This was true. After the war my love life had consisted of a series of very brief affairs with an assortment of both witches and Muggles. None of them lasted beyond even a third date, and at that point I had basically given up on the whole thing. She took another deep breath. "Harry, you're the bravest, noblest, most self-sacrificing person I've ever met, and that gets in your way."

"The other blokes in the office say you 'Potter up' relationships," Ron helpfully offered.

"Potter up?"

Ron squirmed in his seat. "It's like with Ginny, the first time, you broke up with her to protect her while we were off looking for the Horcruxes."

"That was for her own safety!" I protested.

"We're not arguing that Harry," Hermione cut in. "It's just that with you it's duty first, always. It's a never-ending procession of former Death Eaters to catch, or plots to foil. It's an admirable quality really, but it makes you a lousy boyfriend."

"And you think I'm going to do that to Ginny, put the job before her?"

"Again you mean?" Hermione asked sharply.

I winced, "I swear, I've been listening to what you were saying."

Hermione smiled. "I know you were Harry, and I know this isn't easy to hear, but we love you, and we don't want to see you screw things up, again."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"For what it's worth Harry, out of all the blokes Ginny's gone out with, you were my favourite," Ron said. "Even if you did make her cry."

I picked up my tumbler and got out of the easy chair. "Well if the two of you would excuse me, I'm going to finish this glass by myself as I contemplate my failings."

Hermione reached out and caught my hand. "It's not a failing Harry. It's just who you are. Voldemort might be dead, but you're still Harry Potter, and that's not something a lot of people can handle. And for what it's worth, if there is anyone out there who can deal with the full Harry Potter experience it's Ginny. Just don't expect her to be eager to buy another ticket for that particular ride."

"Thanks Hermione, I know you're only looking out for what's best for me," I told her before saying goodnight.

The lesson I want you to take away from this kids is that it's easy to be aware of your faults. As I was about to prove, acting on that knowledge is a whole other story.

****

Author's Notes: There's not a lot to say about this chapter, so I thought I'd take a moment to talk about inspirations. Obviously How I Met Your Mother is the big one, and hopefully the story will keep the sort of "dramedic" tone that HIMYM does so well. But just as important in setting that tone for me was music. There's a very good reason I've taken a line from a Jenny Owen Youngs' song for the title of this thing. In fact I had a very specific playlist while writing that ensure my head was in the right place. So if you go out and listen to Jenny Owen Youngs, Explosions in the Sky, Florence + the Machine, and Silversun Pickups you'll have a pretty good feel for the mood I was working from. Anyway thanks again to everyone who's taken the time to give the story a read.

-sam,