FicWad

When I woke up the next morning Frank was lying on is back just staring at the ceiling with this sort of horrified look on his face. Oh God, he remembered. I reached over and poked his face, trying to act normal.

“Morning Frankie!” Oh, oh. Too loud. Way too loud. “Sorry,” I whispered.

He only shook his head but didn’t say anything. “You ok Frank?”

He pursed his lips and stared at me. “Did you kiss me last night?”

I looked at my feet at the edge of the bed silently. I nodded my head, unable to speak. Here was the awkwardness. I kissed my best friend and it was awkward. Oh man I wish he hadn’t remembered.

He sat up and started his own little rant. I could tell he’d been thinking about what to say for a little while. “Liv, you’re my best friend, but only my friend you know? Like I get it, I’m awesome, but I’ve known you since pre k.” I started giggling while he was talking. “You’re like my sister! I’m sorry to let you down but I don’t want to lead you on. I care about you too much.” He didn’t notice how much I was laughing at this point, he just kept going. “I hope we can still be friends?” I couldn’t breathe. Oh lord this would be how I left the world. Death by laughter.

“What’s so funny?” That set me off even more! I love Frankie to death, I really do.

When my laughter finally slowed I took a deep breath to speak. “Frankie dear, you have no idea how much I love you.”

“I love you too but—”

“Frankie, you’re like my brother, stop.” I looked to the door to make sure it was closed. “Last night I kissed Gerard and then I kissed you.”

He was quiet for a long time. “Say something Frank.”

“I’m offended Olivia! You kiss Gerard and then me? How could I be your second choice!”

I put my hands over my face. “Narcissistic asshole,” I laughed. “I kissed him then you walked in and I was confused.”

“Oh yeah, I do remember that! I saw your boobs!”

I slapped his shoulder. “Shut up! Anyway, I kissed you to figure shit out. Like my feelings and shit.”

“Liv, how does that make any sense?”

“Shhhh. I was drunk, it was drunk people logic.”

He laughed. “So, was I awesome? Was I great? I bet I was wasn’t I. I’ve been told I’m pretty good. I bet I blew Gerard out of the water didn’t I?” He joked.

I shoved him, laughing. “Oh you were great, fantastic. Totally,” I replied sarcastically. I sat up and put my head in my hands. “Oh man Frank, Gerard was amazing though.” I whined. “Like, really. I don’t even know what to do about this.”

“Well do you like him?” I stared at Frank. Is he fucking kidding me? Did I like Gerard? Seriously?

“Hell no! He’s a fucking asshole!”

He winced at my shrill reply. “Hangover, Liv. Hangover.” I laughed. “Face it, you don’t have the greatest track record when it comes to guys.”

“What are you even talking about?”

“You date a shit ton of assholes, Liv.”

“I do not!” I shouted and immediately regretted it. Ow, ow, ow. “Sorry. But seriously, I don’t date assholes.”

“Billy Richards.”

“He wasn’t that bad!”

“The dude dumped you because he didn’t like the way your feet looked.” I didn’t say anything to that. It was true. Ok so maybe Billy was kind of a dick. But still that was only one! “Adam Daniels.”

“Ok he…yeah ok he was an ass.”

“Ricky, Phil, Kyle—”

“I get it!”

“Francis, Tyler, Zach, Ben.” I grabbed my pillow and hit Frank in the face.

“We don’t talk about Ben.” I said sternly. “And I get it Frank. I date assholes. I don’t like Gerard though!” He laughed and smirked. Great he didn’t believe me. I rolled my eyes and changed the subject. “How about a game of hangover racquetball?”

Frank practically jumped out of the bed and ran out the door. Damn that boy could move even when he was hung over. That was a feat. I laughed at how ridiculous he was and followed him, knowing he’d go to the kitchen first.

I found him standing in front of the coffee pot trying to figure out how to work it. It was funny how many times he’d been over to my house and he still didn’t know how to work shit.

“Go get first shower and I’ll make the coffee.”

“Should we invite your lover to our racquetball game?” He said lightheartedly, I knew he was serious though.

I shoved him in the direction of the stairs. “Go take a shower stinky.”

“Hey you’re pretty gross yourself! Maybe we should shower together.” He wiggled his eyebrows jokingly and laughed. That cracked me up! Frank was so good at being creepy sometimes.

“You remember what happened last time!” To any sane person listening, our conversation probably sounded dirty and weird but it really wasn’t. Frank and I just had never showered with someone else before and wanted to see what all the hype was! We didn’t get naked or anything (not that it would matter. Frank and I used to run around naked when we were kids.) Anyway, we just wanted to see what it was like.

Awful.

It was awful. Slippery and dangerous and very not fun. It occurred to us afterwards that people were probably having sex in the shower but that didn’t sound very fun either. Like it took us like 30 minutes just to wash our hair. We kept slipping everywhere and eventually Frank fell on his ass so we got out.

“My butt will never be the same.” Frank laughed and ran up the stairs to the bathroom.

I turned back to the coffeemaker and realized it was probably conversations like those that made people not want to date us. Frank and I said shit like that all the time. People probably thought we were dating, and it didn’t help that we were always with each other. They also probably thought we were fuckin weird. It’s not our fault we’ve known each other for so long though. Like damn, excuse me for being friends with someone.

Everyone at our school thought we were those kids. You know, the ones that like sit in the corner alone and don’t say anything and everyone spreads rumors that they sacrifice goats and shit? Yeah. That was us. That was actually a legit rumor that went around about us. People seriously thought we sacrificed goats. After that one got around to us we went out and bought a book about satanic rituals and began decorating everything with 666 and pentagrams. It was fuckin hilarious to see the whole school's reaction. Whenever someone would whisper about us we'd just start chanting in fake Latin and pretend to be possessed.

People were always trying to find shit to say about us and when they couldn’t, they just made shit up. Once some chick tried to spread a rumor that I was getting a sex change and people believed her! Like the next day everyone came up to me and was like “Oh Olivia I had no idea that’s what you were going through! I just wanna let you know we support you!” It was complete bullshit. That’s why Frank and I didn’t really have friends outside of each other.

I pulled out the coffee can and angrily started a pot. The people at our school were fucking ridiculous with all the shit they made up about me and Frank. I can’t count the number of stupid ass rumors they tried to spread. They were all fake ass bitches who could go suck a dick. Who needs them? Not me. Not Frank. Fuck them.

I didn’t realize I was grumbling to myself until I heard a soft chuckle from the doorway. I turned and blushed when I saw it was Gerard. Great. Frank couldn’t save me now, that fucker took long-ass showers.

I hid my embarrassment and turned to him. “Morning. Bet your head hurts,” I laughed.

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, kind of a lot.”

I wanted to laugh at him but I actually felt bad. Hangovers sucked, yeah, but the first one was always the worst. “Don’t worry, coffee’s on.” He nodded his head and just stood in the doorway. This was the awkwardness I was worried about. This was worse than the awkwardness with Frank, which really wasn’t that bad.

I wanted to ask what he remembered about last night but anything I said would give something away. Luckily I was saved from doing so. He walked over and leaned against the counter in front of me. “So uh…do you remember what happened last night?” My heart hammered. Oh fuck did he remember? Fuck. Shit. Damn! “I don’t remember a thing,” he laughed.

I let out a breath I’d been holding. “Yeah, you got drunk and passed out in my car,” I lied.

He laughed. “Alright. Sounds about right.”

“Yeah. You were a god damn handful to get back in your room. And it didn’t help that Frank was almost as drunk as you,” I laughed. Man I was good at coming up with shit on the spot. I’m not sure if that was a good thing or not.

“So I take it you won the game then?”

“You bet your ass I did!”

Suddenly Frank came bounding down the stairs. “Alright Cap, I’m ready for my coffee!” Gerard winced at his loud voice and I laughed. Frank was really a handful. He looked like he was fine but I knew my Frankie, he was hurting like a mother fucker. He always said he liked to trick his body into thinking it wasn’t hung over. It never really worked. It always came back to bite him in the ass in the end.

Frank sat down in one of the kitchen chairs and started leaning back. “Where’s my coffee woman!”

“Get it yourself asshole, you know where the mugs are!”

“What did you say to me!” He laughed and only just noticed Gerard. “Ah yes, Gerard, the innocent one, hello.” I laughed and put my head in my hands.

“I’m going to take a shower.”

Frank threw up his hands and gestured to Gerard. “Guests first, Olivia!”

“Are you offering up my shower? You don’t live here Frank!”

“I mean basically. I’m always over here,” he said smugly.

“Yeah until the food is gone,” I snorted.

“Which is never!” He said triumphantly. “Face it I practically live here.” I laughed and pushed his chair with my foot, almost tipping him over. Luckily he caught himself. “Whoa hey, not cool bro.” I laughed. “So are we playing racquetball or not!” Frank shouted, slamming his chair down on all four legs.

Gerard winced and looked between us. “Racquetball?”

“We play racquetball whenever we’re hung over.” I explained. “The gym my mom has a membership to has racquetball courts so we play a lot.”

“Wanna play with us?” Frank asked menacingly.

“God damn Frank if you ask him like that he’ll never wanna do anything with us,” I teased. Gerard looked a little uneasy about the idea. I mean I didn’t really blame him. So far everything we’ve pulled him into was pretty illegal. And he probably felt like shit so racquetball probably wasn’t that appealing to him but he can deal. Yeah it sucks at first but it gets way fun.

Frank and I never played the conventional way, shit we didn’t even know how to play the conventional way. We just made shit up and it was fun as hell. Of course we never did things the way you were supposed to. We saw rules as guidelines and just went with what felt right. That should be on a shirt or something. ‘Rules are just guidelines, who needs ‘em.’ That would totally sell.

“I’ll play...” Gerard said, obviously uncomfortable with the idea.

Frank laughed. “That’s the spirit bucko! Now go get a shower.”

After we were all showered and had some coffee we hopped in my car and left.

“So where exactly are we going?” Gerard asked from the back.

“The gym my mom goes to has racquetball courts…and the manager is Frank’s dealer so that’s nice too.”

“Well that’s comforting,” he mumbled.

When we got there Frank and I quickly said hi to Ray, the manager, got our rackets, and ran to the courts with Gerard trailing behind. As soon as he closed the door behind him Frank and I started taking off our shoes. It was really the only fun way to play. When you’re in your socks you slide around a lot more because the floors are so slick and it’s harder to keep balance.

Gerard only stared at us confused.

“What are you guys doing?”

“Getting ready to play? What are you doing?” Frank shouted. He started bouncing excitedly. It had been a while since we played.

As Gerard slowly and skeptically obliged I began explaining how to play. “Ok, so basically you hit the ball at the far wall over there. We play steals so that means you can hit it whenever you want.”

“Why do we have to take our shoes off?”

“More fun. Let’s go!” Frank threw the ball in the air and hit it as hard as he could. It bounced off the back wall and slammed straight into Gerard’s side.

“Fucking Christ Frank! I wasn’t done explaining!” I shouted through laughter. “Nice aim though,” I whispered. He smiled proudly. I walked over to Gerard who was laying on the ground holding his side. I couldn’t tell if he was laughing or crying… “You good dude?” He nodded his head slightly and I could see that he was trying to laugh through the pain. God damn how hard did Frank hit? That was gonna leave one nasty bruise.

“We’ll give you a sec man.” After a few minutes he sat up. “You good?” He nodded his head. “Alright, so as I was saying,” I looked pointedly at Frank who only smiled brightly, “you can steal the ball whenever. If it doesn’t make it back we race to see who serves. Face shots get extra points.”

“Wait what—”

“Ok let’s go!” Frank hit the ball again and the game began. Basically we took racquetball and mixed it with dodge ball. I did a horrible job of explaining but he’d get the hang of it. The whole point was to try and hit people while doing your best to dodge and stay on your feet. It was damn hard but hella rad.

We’d never really played with three people before. Generally Frank and I didn’t hang out with anyone else and only two people were allowed on the courts to deter any injuries. Ray knew us though and he didn’t give a shit what we did. The third person really did make it interesting. It made it harder to dodge and racing to the ball was harder.

At one point I pushed Frank who lost his footing and fell to the floor laughing. He stayed there for like five minutes while the game went on and only got up to enact his revenge when Gerard hit him in the crotch. I though it was fucking hilarious but Frank kept screaming about his ‘boys.’

I think out of all of us Gerard was hit the most. Frank and I were on some wavelength. Like we just teamed up to get the fucker. It was great. We were all gonna have some bruises tomorrow but damn would we have a story to tell.

After the game was finally over Frank was laying spread-eagle in the middle of the court. I couldn’t tell if he was passed out or what. Gerard and I sat in a corner of the room. He was panting heavily with his head on his knees.

“Why did you think that was a good idea? Ohg God I feel like shit.” I just laughed. He could be such a baby sometimes.

“Calm down dude, you’ll be fine in an hour.” So Frank was alive then.

“That’s not really how racquetball is played is it?” Gerard sounded kind of scared, like if that was how the game was actually played he’d fuckin die or some shit.

I had to laugh loudly at that. Like really dude? You’re gonna believe that that’s a game? “Do you actually think someone would make a game where the sole purpose is to hit people in the face with a rubber ball flying around the room?”

“Then how the fuck did you come up with this?” He asked incredulously.

I looked down at my feet. It’s not like the conception of this game was awful or anything it’s just a shitty story and only further proves why I fucking hate the people at my school. “Uh, when we were like fourteen these two kids at our school asked us out on a double date. As a joke. We went to the movies and waited for like 15 minutes for them to show up holding hands. Then they bought their tickets and waved goodbye as they walked into the theater.”

“Luckily Cap’s mom had waited for us so she just took us to the gym with her. And we found the racquetball courts.”

“So we just made shit up as we went along.”

“I like to think we had more fun than them,” Frank joked.

I laughed along but didn’t say how it actually had hurt me. I mean don’t get me wrong, I like the initial outcome. We found our favorite game, we had more fun together, ya know just had a really fuckin good time. Doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt at the time. I never told Frank but I actually did cry about it that night. I mean, shit, my crush asked me out as a joke and laughed in my fucking face. In middle school that shit actually matters. I dunno, it made me a better person though. I didn’t take shit from boys after that. Or anyone for that matter.

“The people at your school sound like assholes.” Oh how fuckin right he was.

I'm gonna apologize because I know this was a fuckin long chapter but it was one of my favorites to write! Anyway, please rate and review! Have a wonderful day my lovelies!