FicWad

It had been almost two months.I had moved in with Patrick, Carla didn't say much about it but that she was glad I did, she was wanting to offer me a place at her house but it wouldn't of been much better than my own. They had both convinced me not to go back and see Brendon even though I promised him I would. Patrick had taken me to all my doctors appointments even when Carla wanted to go, he was so sweet to me but I couldn't help but think of Brendon, of how alone he must feel and how sad he must be. I waited for a day I knew Patrick would be out a while and I went to see him.
I took a deep breath as I told the receptionist his name and she buzzed me through the metal door to the cafeteria area with all the plastic tables and the folding chairs. I waited and took another deep breath as Brendon entered the room in the same puke green scrubs. His hair looked neat and he looked shaven this time. I saw him smile a bit when he saw me. He had no hand cuffs on this time and was only led by one guard.
"How are you doing Brendon?" I asked With a smile happy to see him, he smiled back at me his full lips parting a bit so I could see his perfect white teeth.
"They say I'm doing really well, and I think so too, I don't have crazy mood swings or anger anymore, so that's pretty good. I have a review next week to see if I can leave or not, but other than all that I just want to go home." He smiled at me a little the whole time. "How are you? How's our daughter?" He asked.
"I'm financially down but Patrick's really been helping me out a lot. I've been a constant emotional roller coaster. But she's fine, getting big and kicking a lot." I said.
"Can I feel her?" He asked and I nodded then he asked the guard who did the same. I stood up and walked over to him.
"Wow." He commented and smiled at the growing size if my stomach. He carefully put his hands on it.
"I don't feel any thing" he looked up at me worriedly.
"Try talking to her, she can hear you." I said his eyes lit up and he leaned in closer to my stomach.
"Hey, it's dad." He said and looked up at me for confermation, I smiled and he continued to talk.
"I want to meet you so much, I was sick for a while but I feel better now. I want to be the best dad ever." I knew he was crying.
"I'm so sorry, even if I don't get to be in you're life, I want you to know I'll always love you just like I do mommy." He said then ran his fingers gently over my belly again before I returned to my seat. He wiped away some tears and smiled at me, I felt like crying too but I wouldn't let myself.
"I was thinking about some baby names if you still want me to help name her." He said.
"Yeah, of course I do." I said.
"I was thinking Austin, I know its a boy name but I think it would be kind of cool maybe paired with a really girly middle name like Anna." He said.
"Austin Anna Urie?" I questioned. And he looked at me with big eyes.
"Your giving her my last name? I thought it would be Austin Anna Polkin, but this is wonderful." He said.
"I thought about it, but I still don't know yet.
"Either way is fine, I just don't know If I can take it being Austin Anna Stump. I'm scared Amy." He said sadly.
"This is your daughter, not Patrick's. Patrick is sweet but I can't even begin to care about him the way I do for you.
"If you want to be with him that's fine, I just want you to be happy, no matter what. I just want our daughter to be ours no matter who's in the picture, just do me that small favor." He said.
"I promise you she will stay ours." I said.
"Hey, if I do get to get out next week, would it be possible for us to go out to do something together? I just want to take it a step at a time, because I know you don't trust me and you have every reason not to. I just want you to see I'm different now." He said. He deserved a chance after this much effort.
"Okay." I agreed.
"I still love you Amy" he said.
"I still love you too Bren." I said standing up to leave. We said goodbye And I headed back to Patrick's house.
I walked in the door and was surprised by Patrick sitting on the couch watching TV.
"Hey! Your home." I said kicking off my shoes and going over to sit with him on the couch.
"Yeah, I got here about an hour ago. Where did you go?" He asked.
"Had another weird food craving again." I said.
"You don't need to lie to me." He smiled catching me in my lie.
"How did you know?" I asked
"Your a bad at lying." He chuckled.
"Oh yeah? Then where was I really?" I asked.
"You went to see Brendon. How was it?" He asked.
"Your not mad?" I asked.
"Not at all, I can't make you do anything, plus were friends so I'm here for you no matter what you decide to do.so how was it?"
He said.
"Good, better than last time when we went. He seemed so normal, I can actually see that he's better, I still don't know if I trust him." I said.
"You seem happy.. well happier than last night." He said a bit sadly, I really was hoping he would never bring up last night again, but I knew why he was so sad talking about Brendon, that's why I wanted to hide it from him.
"I was sad last night, and I wanted to thank you for being there for me." I said hoping he would get the message.
"I know you didn't mean to kiss me, but for about three seconds last night I had this glimmer of hope. Its okay though,It really is. I know who you want, I've always known. I just wish you could look at me the way you do him not because I'm jealous, but because I know it's safer and I know their are no risks and I just care about you, but were just friends and I'm here no matter who you decide to love and I definatly can't make you love me, but I can be here no matter what." He said spilling all his pent up emotions before me. I didn't know what to say and he knew I didn't.
"Find any baby names you like yet?" He asked switching to a different topic as if he hadn't just rambled how he felt out to me.
"Austin, Austin Anna." I said.
"It's neat for a girls name." He smiled. "Urie?" He asked.
"No, Brendon and I talked about it but I decided on my way home she is going to have my last name." I said.
"Is Brendon aright with that." Patrick asked. " I think the last thing you want to do now is tick him off about Austin's last name"
"He basically said as long as its not stump it was fine." I smiled as Patrick laughed, he genuinely thought it was funny.
"I couldn't get either of your last names to be Stump If I tried." He still laughed.
Wait, was he talking about marriage some how? Me and him?
"You wouldn't marry me." I said.
"You think?" He raised an eyebrow at me being playfully cocky"
"You would get so aggravated with me all the time." I laughed.
"I would, your so stubborn." He smiled "but I still would." He said.
"Sometimes I think about what life would be like with you." I admitted.
"What do you think it would be like?" He asked.
"I would be happy, and so would you But it just wouldn't feel right to me." I said.
"It doesn't matter as long as you wern't hurt." He said. "I hope Brendon is better so you can be happy, you and Austin." He said.

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"Not the turtle shell! Anything but the turtle shell!" I yelled as Patrick and I played Mario cart, I was in the lead and he knocked me out of it with a turtle shell.
"Yes!" He yelled throwing his fists in the air. "Victory!" He yelled winning the race, I pouted."don't be a sore loser" he laughed at my fake pouty face.
"I just don't understand how you always win." I said.
"Hey, I'm just the underdog hero." He laughed.
"Yeah right! Your like the wicked old Mario cart tyrant." I laughed.
"Old?" It was his turn to fake pout now, Patrick was four years older than me so I would often make old man jokes.
"I guess that's why you win Mario cart, you have years of more expierience than me" I giggled.
"You should be glad your pretty." He teased.
" If I was that pretty maybe you would let me win Mario cart every once and a while." I said and then herd a knocking at the door and he got up off the couch and went to get it.
"Not a chance." He said before he opened the door. I herd a fimiliar voice and my heart skipped a beat.
"Hey, have you seen Amy? I went to her house but she had moved out." It was Brendon, I hadn't seen him in three days. Patrick looked to mW from the door way and I nodded, he had looked a bit horrified since he an served the door.
"Sure, one on in." He said letting him in. I got up and ran to Brendon, when he saw me he seemed really exited too.
"I missed you so much." He said into the hug and I said the same thing.
"So what's up with you being here?" He asked curiously.
"I live here." I answered and the happiness dropped off his face.
"Its not like that Been, promise." Patrick said.
"Thank you for taking care of her, your such a good friend." Brendan said to Patrick.
"Don't mention it."he said.
"How's my Austin?" Brendon asked and knlelt down on the floor and ran his fingers over my stomach. I saw Patrick cringe a little before walking off to the kitchen.
"Pretty good, her kicks are getting harder though, right now she's kicking." I said and Brendan looked up at me with a smile.
"I feel her!" He said excitedly. "This is amazing." He said now in awe.
"Let's go get some baby stuff, right now." He said. I was surprised by his eagerness and agreed.
"Hey Been, could I talk to her for a minute?" Patrick asked.
"Yeah, sure, I'll be in the car " Brendon said and walked out. I grabbed my bag and jacket and went into the kitchen where Patrick was.
"What's up?" I asked.
"I need to give you something and I need you to humor me, okay?" He asked and I nodded before he opened a kitchen drawer to reveal a black handgun. He picked it up. "This is how you turn the safety off, and this is how you load it." He said showing me and revealing that there were bullets in it. I watched carefully and nodded. It was weird seeing Patrick with a gun in his hands working it like he always knew how. He handed it to me and I put it in my bag.
"If you need it, don't be afraid to use it" he said then gave me a long unexpected hug.
I thanked him and headed out to the car with Brendon.

hey guys, just here to rate and leave some comments on how I'm doing. Yes, I know the spelling and grammars are pretty bad, but I've written like 50% of this story on my phone. Anyway, thanks for reading so far!