Categories > Anime/Manga > Naruto > Thinking About You

3.2

by FFisoline 0 reviews

SasuxSaku/AU/OOC/SongFic: A wedding to attend to, flashbacks of a past love interest, unsettled emotions and all that other typical romantic clichés. But the biggest and greatest cliché of them a...

Category: Naruto - Rating: R - Genres: Drama,Romance - Characters: Sakura,Sasuke - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2017-10-23 - 4952 words - Complete

0Unrated
(3.2)

MIDNIGHT MOUTHS

"/Not Sasori."/

By the time they walked out of the store, it had already gotten dark.

Sasuke laid the purchased items on one of the benches along the walkway. Then he and Tenten started going through the materials.

"Are you bringing those home with you?", Tenten asked him. "I live pretty close to the school. I don't mind holding on to those for you. I'll just bring them to school tomorrow.", she offered.

"Can you carry all of those?", Ino wondered.

"Pssh! No biggie!", Tenten answered confidently.

"Well, if you insist.", said Sakura. "Thanks, Sasuke-kun have a roommate back at his dorm so~"

"Aa."

Tenten stared at Sasuke expectantly. "Meaning?", she asked as she glanced at Sakura.

Sakura smiled at Tenten. "He meant yes and thanks." Then she turned to Sasuke "Right, Sasuke-kun?"

"Aa." Sasuke didn't even look at her.

Sakura felt that he was suddenly acting cold towards her.

Tenten hailed a Taxi cab.

Sasuke helped her get the materials on the car.

"See you tomorrow.", bid Tenten as she got in the car.

Just as the taxi drove off, Ino's phone rang.

"Hey Shikamaru.", she greeted the caller. "Oh... Really?..."

Since Ino was busy with the call, Sakura took the opportunity to talk to Sasuke.

"Sasuke-kun?"

Sasuke slowly turned to look at her.

"Uhm~" she hadn't really thought that far enough. She didn't know what she was supposed to say. She only wanted to confirm that he wasn't upset with her.

['He's not angry, is he? Why would he be angry over what Ino had said?']

"Hey guys!", Ino called them. "Shikamaru and Choji are in a nearby Bar-b-q joint. They're inviting us to join them... Yeah, you too Sasuke.", she shared.

"I don't believe you for a second.", Sasuke told her.

Ino blinked. "You know I just realized that, that just now, were the first words you have ever said to me? And this in fact, is the very first conversation we ever had. Funny. But... it's kind of amazing."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

/"Sasuke-kun is like an unreachable entity. I supposed it made people think that; if you were acknowledged by him, you must be someone very special."/

"Sorry. Was that weird?", Ino smiled at him. Then she looked at Sakura with an apologetic expression. "You're not coming as well, I supposed?"

"Uh, no. I want to get as much done as soon as possible." Sakura held her grocery bag closer to her chest.

Ino turned to Sasuke again. "You're walking her to the bus stop right?"

Sasuke nodded at her then turned away. He started walking to the direction of the bus stop.

Sakura shifted her gaze from Sasuke's back to Ino who was smiling more softly at her.

Ino twirled and started walking in the other direction. "See you in school Forehead." She waved her hand back at Sakura.

As soon as Ino was walking away, Sakura turned on her heels and ran after Sasuke.

.

.

.

"Sasuke-kun!", she called to him.

He didn't slow down.

"Sasuke-kun!", she tried calling him again. She was getting mad. "If you're in such a hurry then don't bother! Just go home-"

Sasuke suddenly stopped and Sakura ended up running into his backpack.

She almost fell backwards so she tried to grab his bag in an attempt to stable herself.

At the same time however, Sasuke turned around on reflex and reached out to hold her in place.

Sakura didn't fall. She was able to move her left leg back to secure her stance because her right hand caught Sasuke's left hand.

Sasuke's right hand was stretched out, holding her by her waist. He realized that she was still bent back a little so he gently pulled her to help her straighten herself.

His actions caught her off guard and she lost her balance so in order to keep her nose from being planted on his chest, she held her hands out instead.

...

['So this is what a boy's chest feels like.']

Sakura knew Sasuke was a boy. But she thought of him generally as a person. It was only at that moment that she finally understood the idea of the opposite sex.

['Come to think of it. I've never been this close to a boy before. Would Sasori's chest feel like this as well.']

~Thump Thump~

She felt and heard Sasuke's heartbeat. Then she was aware of her own heart beating really fast.

/"You want to be able to... touch him!"/

Blood rushed to her head. She blushed heavily and shut her eyes so tight.

"Are you in pain?"

His voice snapped her out of her thoughts. She pushed herself back a little to look up at him and lost herself in his eyes.

Sasuke was carefully studying her facial expression, like he always had - as if all the answers he needed from her would be visible on her face.

A car drives by. The headlights shone on them for a moment, illuminating Sakura's blushed.

Sasuke had a good look at her vulnerable expression and then, he was suddenly more aware. His eyes widened in realization and he quickly withdrew his hand from her.

Sasuke stepped back and kneeled down to pick up the bag Sakura had dropped earlier. He dusted the dirt off of it before handing it to her without even looking at her and as soon as Sakura took it, he immediately stood up and turned around.

"You're mad after all.", murmured Sakura as he was walking away. "Is it because of what Ino said?" she forced a chuckle. "Now you know huh? Do you understand now why I told you that you made me feel like a horrible person?!"

Sasuke just kept walking further away.

['Does he not want to talk to me about it?']

"But you already had an idea of how unpleasant and selfish I was right from the start!", she spoke louder. "I told you, I'm a horrible person! Now you know just how ugly I truly am, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke turned around and glared at her.

"That's right... It's all for Sasori.", she admitted. "Everything I'm doing. The reason I've been working really hard! The real reason why I was motivated enough to approach you. The real reason why it's so important for me that I beat Hyuuga Neji. And the real reason why I have to convince my family to let me go to Tokyo.

['It's not supposed to be like this. Why do I sound like I'm pleading? I'm acting like, I want him to understand?']

It was never about me proving myself to my grandparents. I just wanted to keep my promise with Sasori! So I can be with him!"

Sasuke was about to say something but decided against it. He quickly turned around again and continued walking.

"What the-... We-", Sakura threw her hands in the air.

['Is this how it's gonna be between us from now on?! Why won't he just talk to me? Yell at me so I can apologize and then we can act like this conversation didn't even happen.']

"Hey!" she ran after him. "Well?! Weren't you going to say something?! What? You think I can't handle it?!", she yelled.

"What do you want from me?", he sneered as he turned on his heel without stopping. "What do you want me to say?!"

"Anything! The truth! If you're angry then tell me! Yell at me!", she continued as she moved forward.

"The truth?! The truth is I don't really know anything, apparently.", Sasuke deadpanned then he turned away again and walked on.

"That's it?! That's all you want to tell me?! That's all you're going to say?!" she tried to match his phase. "Oh yeah! I forgot! This is what you do to people who /upset /you! You pretend like they don't exist."

Sakura suddenly spoke in a low voice, "Look at me, I'm Uchiha Sasuke! I never do anything wrong. The real problem is how other people react to the things I do. But I have no time to explain myself to anyone because no one's worth my time. They can talk dirt behind my back for all I care. I'm the better person!"

Sasuke side-glanced her then quickened his phase.

"Tck!", Sakura clucked in frustration and walked faster. "Hey?! Aren't you mad?! ... I- I forced my way into your life! ... I snuck my nose into your personal affairs! … Even though you said you sympathize with me? ... All this time, whenever I was talking about your friendship with Naruto. ... Whenever I was talking about your relationship with your family. ... Whenever I was talking about your brother."

Sasuke kept silent as he continued walking. Sakura also continued to keep up with him.

"It was all so... I can get you to... improve... your performance... in school." she was panting at this point. "Because... I wanted-"

"So what?!", he cut her off sharply.

Sakura stopped. Her breathing was uneven.

Sasuke halted as well when saw the bus stop - only a few more steps away from where they were. Unable to hold back any longer, he said what wanted to say.

"So what if you did it all for your own sake? So what if I found out? /So what/?!... SO WHAT?!", he finally yelled back at her. "Does it really matter to you what I think? Or what anyone else thinks for that matter?! If I tell you how selfish and conceited you are, would you stop?!"

Sakura gave no response.

Sasuke looked her in the eye. "What is it that you want to hear from me? That I'm disappointed at you?"

"Y-Yes!", she wouldn't let herself be intimidated by him.

"That I was a fool for trusting you? For believing that there was actually someone who cared enough to look under my skin?" Sasuke tried to dominate her by raising his voice a little.

"Yes!", she yelled, her voice cracking.

"That you're just using me?! And now I'm mad at you?! Is that it?!", he was much louder this time.

"YES!", she yelled again, her eyes tearing up.

"Is that what you wanted to hear?! That I-"

"THAT YOU HATE ME!"

After her quavering shout, Sakura sniffed.

Sasuke took a deep breath and did his best to calm down. "You know what? ... Don't take it out on me just because you're feeling guilty."

Sakura sniffed once again as she reached for her hairclips.

"That's it... right?", he said reluctantly. "You're not proud of the fact that you're romantically motivated. You're guilty for wanting to love and be love. You're guilty for wanting to be happy? But you would do anything and everything in your power so you can be, even if it means hurting or using other people.

You knew at some point you're doing something wrong. But you're not going to stop anyway, because you think you're doing it for the right reason. … Because being with this /Sasori/, that's what's going to complete you. That's what makes you want to live this life.

You call yourself ugly and unpleasant. But do you seriously believe that about yourself? ... You only want me to think you are. You only want to give me a reason to hate you-You need to give me a reason to hate you! … /So~/, you can pretend to be suffering as well! /So~/, you're not the only one who's happy! /SO~/, you can lessen your guilt and feel better about yourself!"

Sakura looked away as she was unable to face him. "Do you?!... Do you hate me now?"

"No." he shook his head. "No I don't... I can't.", he told her, matter of fact.

Sakura had to look at him again.

"Why?!", she implored, holding back her tears.

"Because honestly, I don't believe you when you said that everything you're doing is all for Sasori.", he answered.

"…"

"You… If that was the case, you wouldn't have cared about what your family would have thought of you and you would have done exactly what you thought Kakashi was asking you to do back then.", he continued. "You once told me that you can't bring yourself to run away from your home even if your parents didn't understand you. That's because you love them and you do want them to understand you. You do want them to be proud of you.

Everything you're doing... It's not all for Sasori.

And I don't know why it upsets me but I am! I. Am. Upset. I'm upset that you let your best friend think that. You let her believe that that's who YOU are! Someone who puts this... Sasori… /at the center of your life/. But fine! That's between you and her. … But to let yourself think that?! And now, you want me to believe that?! ... You- You… You deserve so much more than you give yourself credit for."

Sakura was deeply moved and couldn't hold back the tears any longer.

['You... If you keep this up... I'm really going to... fall in love with you']

Sasuke moves forward and held his hand out to her. He was attempting to wipe the tears from her cheeks.

But she slaps his hand away and stepped back. "Stop it!"

['I'm the one who has to stop.']

"Just stop being nice to me! Why are you the one who's here with me?!"

['Don't say anything anymore.']

"Why isn't HE here instead of you? You're not /him/! You're not /Sasori/!"

As soon as Sakura was done yelling, a bus makes its way to the bus stop. It slowed down and passed them.

Sasuke heard the vehicle stopped, and he walked pass Sakura without saying anything.

Sakura ran to the opposite direction and towards the bus.

The both of them never looked back.

She got on the bus and dropped down to an empty seat. She sniffled as she leaned back and then harshly wiped her cheeks dry.

She was tired and she was miserable. She wished that the day would just end.

~/We were running off our midnight mouths/

Saying things that we don't mean

When you're playing in the dark

Well, nothing's as it seems

It's just the lonely, just the lonely talking

So don't you tell me that you're falling for me now

It's just the lonely, just the lonely talking

So don't you tell me that you're falling for me

We're in too deep, so let go of my hand

Can't you see you mess with my head just because you can

Come for me, you're lying through your teeth

Could be anyone, you just want somebody

You just want somebody

It's just the lonely, talking

When you're messing with hell fire

Angels turn to anarchy

I wish what you said was true

But it's not reality

It's just the lonely, just the lonely talking

So don't you tell me that you're falling for me now

It's just the lonely, just the lonely talking

So don't you tell me that you're falling for me

We're in too deep, so let go of my hand

Can't you see you mess with my head just because you can

Come for me, you're lying through your teeth

Could be anyone, you just want somebody

You just want somebody

It's just the lonely, talking

You just want somebody

It's just the lonely, talking

It's just the lonely, just the lonely talking

It's just the lonely, talking

It's just the lonely, just the lonely talking

We're in too deep, so let go of my hand

Can't you see you mess with my head just because you can

Come for me, you're lying through your teeth

Could be anyone, you just want somebody

You just want somebody

It's just the lonely, talking

You just want somebody

/(MIDNIGHT MOUTHS - Lauren Aquilina)/~

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.

.

It was twenty eight minutes past the hour of three.

Sakura's room was a mess. She didn't throw her things all over the place to vent out her frustration but she might as well have.

Her floor was littered by crumpled pieces of paper. A lot of her stuff had been shoved to the side to give way to the medical books, printouts and the copy of Sasori's practice thesis that were laid all over her bed and even her dresser.

She was by her study table that was equally filled with stacks of printouts and her newly bought books. The little space she had left to work with had her writing in an awkward position.

She stopped writing to read the only sentence she had written so far. She starts looking around the table for her eraser only to see it on the floor. She was about to pick it up but as her hand was close enough to reach it, she drew her hand back and looked back at the paper.

She just crossed out the sentence with her mechanical pencil. She skipped a line and started writing a new sentence. She was on the fifth word when she stopped and tapped the paper with her pencil.

She reached for her temples as she rested her shoulders on top of her desk. She rubbed her temples before reaching for her hairclips then she threw back her braids over her shoulders and tried to write again.

She made a mistake again. Frustrated, she eventually picked up her eraser. She started erasing too heavily that it tore the paper. She threw the eraser aside and tore off the sheet of paper from her pad, crumpled it and threw it somewhere on the floor. She picked up her pencil and tried to start over.

Nothing. She couldn't write anything. She eventually slammed down her pencil and shoved her stationeries off her table, making a loud noise. Then she leaned forward on the table.

Not long after, she heard heavy footsteps stomping towards her bedroom. Her door slammed open, revealing a furious blonde woman in her night gown.

"For crying out loud! Do you know what time it is?!", she yelled at Sakura who just remained still.

The woman's eyes took in the scene in front of her. "I thought you were sleepy so you didn't bother to eat dinner?! You've been there all along, keeping the lights on until morning! Electricity isn't cheap! Who do you think has to work all day to pay for it?!", she scolded Sakura as she walked into the room.

"You haven't even changed out of your uniform and what is it with all this mess?!" Her eyes landed on the bag from Sakura's recent purchase. The receipt was still stapled to it.

She picked it up and a new wave of anger overcame her as she read the amount she had to pay for. "You spent your entire allowance on these! I can't give you any more for this month you know that?! Why do you keep buying these books?! Are you doing this just to spite me? You know I can't afford to send you to college!"

Sakura bolted up from her chair at the mention of college. "No! Mom. You promised! You said you'd let me go! You said grandmother will pay for it if I just graduate as the top student!"

"Well are you going to? Can you really beat the Hyuuga heir?!"

"..."

"See. You don't know! You're not sure! You can't! You're not going to placed first Sakura. It's impossible."

"Yeah?! You know that so well, don't you?!", Sakura yelled back at her mother. "Everyone knows that so well. That's why that's the condition grandmother asked for?! All of this... This deal was nothing but a means for you to pacify me! You never believed in me! You never intended to support me from the very beginning!"

"You're not the only one who's having a hard time Sakura! I have my own problems. Don't you dare take your frustrations out on me, young lady! It's not my fault you're in this situation. You're the one who wants this! That deal... was between you and your grandmother. You're her problem now. She's the one you have to impress."

"Why?!", Sakura groaned. "Why can't all of you just be proud of me for what I've accomplished?! Why can't that be enough? Why do I have to be number one before I can get grandmother's approval?! Why can't you understand how important it is for me to go to college?! To become a doctor?! It's my dream!"

Sakura's father appeared behind her mother. He walks in lazily and still half asleep. "What's with all this racket?"

Sakura's mother turned to her husband, a mustached man with natural burgundy hair. "Kizashi, this daughter of yours is at it again!", She told him while pointing at Sakura.

"Mebuki" Sakura's father reached for his wife shoulders from behind her. "Calm down. We're all tired and sleepy. Let's not get into this now."

"All this enthusiasm to move to Tokyo and go to college, you're not even that passionate about being a doctor! You're just doing it to impress a boy!", her mother continued despite her father's words.

Sakura was suddenly enraged. "Get out!", she yelled and moved towards her parents to push them out of her room. "Get out of my room! You don't know anything! You don't understand me one bit!"

['Only he knows! He's the only one who understands.']

As soon as they were out of her room, Sakura slammed the door shut and locked it. "Leave me alone!", she yelled and leaned her back on the door.

("Leave you alone?!")

-her mother was even more furious as she shouted from the hallway. She started banging on her daughter's door.

("Mebuki stop that.")

("Hah! You think you're good enough on your own?! Do you really think you can make it on your own?! Do you think that if you move out of this house everything would be easier for you? That you're going to be better off in Tokyo?!")

Mebuki stopped banging on the door but went on scolding her daughter.

("How are you going to live your college days there? Even if you're grandmother approves of this and pay for your education, how are you going to pay for everything else?!")

Sakura stayed quiet at the other end of the door.

("Is this boy going to support you? Or are you going to depend on Ino for the rest of your life? Damn it Sakura! Be reasonable!")

Mebuki's voice started to crack.

("Just how much do you want to get away from us?")

Sakura covered her ears with her hands. "S-Shut up!", she tried to yell but her voice gave out as tears escaped her eyes.

("Just how eager are you to get as far away from here as possible?")

Mebuki started crying as well by then.

("Don't cry dear.")

-Sakura heard her father's voice.

("Come on. Let's just go back to bed. Let's continue talking about this in the morning when we're all well rested and we've calmed down.")

Sakura heard her parents move away from the door. She slid down to sit on the floor. She then raked her fingers into her scalp frustratingly. She felt her hair clips and forcefully pulled it out. She considered throwing it away but she didn't have the strength to let go of it. She ended up holding tighter onto it as she hugged her knees.

("You too Sakura.")

-Kizashi yelled from across the hallway.

("You go to bed and get some rest too sweetie.")

Sakura heard the door of her parents' bedroom closed. Then silence.

She lowered her head, recalling Sasuke's words

/"... That's because you love them and you do want them to understand you. You do want them to be proud of you.

Everything you're doing... It's not all for Sasori."/

['Sasuke-kun's the only one who understands me... and yet I... I'm the worst! I really am the worst!']

She let out a heavy breath and started sobbing.

.

.

.

The sound of an alarm breaks the silence. A narrow distance between two curtains allows a thin line of light to shine into the room.

Sakura's room was still littered with crumpled papers. The bed was still occupied by books. A hand appears from a corner of the bed feeling around for the offending item. Struggling a bit due to its limited reach, the hand eventually finds the phone.

Sakura rested her back comfortably again on the floor where she had been lying. The light from her phone screen illuminates her reddened eyes.

'Wake-up-call:USasuke'

-she read the reminder.

She turned off the alarm and placed her phone beside her head before turning to her side and going back to sleep.

.

.

.

Sakura entered her bedroom fresh from her bath. She was wearing an old, worn-out plain grey t-shirt and red track shorts.

She stood in front of her mirror and continued drying her hair with a towel. Afterwards, she hanged her towel and reached for her comb. As soon as she was done combing her hair, she neatly drew back her fringes as she put on a red headband.

Her phone - that was just on top of her dresser - rang and she made a move to answer the call.

"How are you doing Forehead? Has your fever gone down yet?"

Sakura went to sit on the chair by her study table.

"Ino, the truth is... I'm not really sick. I lied to Kakashi-sensei when I called him last tuesday.", she admitted.

"What? Why? Did something happen... between you and Sasuke?! He was the last person you were with Monday night?!"

['Seriously, this girl. I swear her intuition is spot on.']

"I'm sorry!I just wanted to make it clear to him that you already like someone else. I didn't intend for him to get that upset. Did he get mad? I didn't think he would. I don't think he is. Forehead?!"

"No! That's not it.", she lied. "I'm just... taking a break from school so I can focus on helping Sasori. You know, his deadline is coming up so~" her eyes landed on her cluttered study table.

"Eh? Is it too much for you? Want me to talk to Sasori about it?"

"No! I can handle it! I just need to focus on it."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"And what about your mom? Is she okay with you skipping class?"

"I'm not really sure it matters to her whether I skip class or not. For all I know, she would even prefer it, if I just drop out of school and start working."

"Come on. Don't say that."

"Speaking of school... How much have I missed?"

"Not much, aside from some quizzes but the teachers said they'd let you take make-ups when you come back. Oh, there are a few homework."

"I see. Did-"

['Did Sasuke-kun come to class? Will he still come to class after everything?']

"Huh?"

"D-Do you mind bringing my homework here?"

"Oh. Actually-"

Sakura's phone vibrated. "Hold on Ino. Someone else is calling me."

She took the phone away from her ear for a moment to check who was calling. Then she returned the phone by her ear. "It's Sasori. I have to take this."

"Oh okay. Call me back after you talk to him okay."

"Yeah. Bye." Sakura then answered Sasori's call. "Hello. Sasori."

"Good evening Sakura. Are you still at school or are you on the bus?"

"I- I'm at- I just got home."

"Oh okay. Sorry I'm troubling you so much but, I was wondering how much you've progress on my practice thesis?"

"Oh. I..." She started playing with the ends of her hair. "…made a lot of progress. I think I'll be done by..." Sakura checked her calendar.

The dates from the first to the eight of July have all been marked with a cross. The words 'Start of Finals' was written on the thirteenth which was a Monday and then directly below it, which was the twentieth, were the words 'Sasori's deadline'.

"...The eleventh. By Saturday."

"I see. As expected. That's my Sakura!"

Sakura smiled painfully.

"So, I thought I'd give you a prize for everything you've been doing for me."

"A prize?" Sakura gripped her hair. "Oh no! I don't dese- I don't need one. Really!"

"Why not? I actually already thought of a good prize for you."

"Y-You didn't have to."

"Don't you want to know what I thought of giving you?"

"W-What is it?"

"You don't sound too excited. Aren't you happy about it?"

"No. Of course I'm happy that you've thought of me. I just- Well!" Sakura tried to sound happier. "What did you think of getting me?"

"It's a secret!"

Sasori chuckled while Sakura rubbed her temple.

"You'll find out soon enough though. Uhm... I gotta go. Talk to you later."

"O-Okay."

There was a knock on Sakura's door just as Sasori ended the call.

Sakura's father slightly pushed her door open. "Sweetheart?", he announced his presence and peeked inside.

When Sakura didn't make any protest, he pushed the door fully open. He had a wide grin on his face. "There's a really handsome young man outside."

Sakura's face brightened up.

"And he's looking for y-" Her father was not able to finish what he was saying as he stepped aside to make way for Sakura who excitedly ran out of the room.

"Thanks Dad!", she yelled back to her father.

.

.

.

['He's here!']

Sakura arrived at the genkan. She carelessly stepped off of her slippers and didn't bother to put on any outdoor footwear. She eagerly reached for the door handle and turned it to open their front door.

"Sasori!", she called the boy beyond the entrance.

"Sorry.", he said. "I'm sorry I'm still not Sasori."

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