Categories > Cartoons > Gumby

Secrets And Addictions

by PickleGarden 0 reviews

The characters from Bump In The Night square off with Gumby and Pokey on the Jerry Springer show.

Category: Gumby - Rating: R - Genres: Parody - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2023-01-17 - 2808 words - Complete

Don't take this seriously. This is only something I wrote all in the name of fun!

On stage in Stamford Connecticuit. There was a controversal talk show being filmed there. This talk show deals with issues like sleeping with strippers, Kung Fu Rednecks, shocking surprises, having affairs with step parents, rape, psycho midgets, hate groups, shot gun weddings, and even murder. Walking out on stage, there was the man himself, Jerry Springer. The audience claps as he makes his way.

"Good afternoon everyone. Today we have a very special show for you all. Instead of the usual people we have on like trailer trash from the deep south. Joining us today are three cartoon characters from a long forgotten 1990s cartoon. On ABC Saturday morning in 1993, These characters got their start being bumpers. You know the whole, 'After These Message We'll Be Right Back' sort of thing. Then got their own show the year after. These guys have aired alongside with a cartoon lineup from back then. Which included cartoons like Cro, Bugs Bunny and Tweety, Addams Family, Free Willy, Tales From The Cryptkeeper, Fudge, Reboot, and of course perhaps the most famous cartoon that aired from that time, Sonic Sat Am. Here they are, the characters from Bump In the Night!"

The audience claps as they see Mr. Bumpy, Molly Coddle, and Squishington all enter the stage.

"Take a seat you guys." Jerry Springer tells them. Mr. Bumpy, Molly Coddle, and Squshington all take their seats. The audience stopped clapping when Jerry Springer wanted to interview them.

"So, what has it been like for you since ABC cancelled your show?" asked Jerry Springer.

"Well," begins Mr. Bumpy, "It hasn't been easy. I never got over my sock eating addiction. I get a high from it like crack!"

"We've been living in a sewer since 2007!" Squishington added on. "Then I got addicted to eating feces!" "Just like me with socks." Mr. Bumpy added.

"How in the world did that happen?" asked Jerry Springer.

"After Bump In The Night got the ax, our owner outgrew us and we were sent to a thrift store." Molly Coddle explains.

"Really? Then what?" asked Jerry Springer.

"We were bought by other kids, but they played with us for a while then lost interest." Mr. Bumpy tells. "Yeah, they would throw us out into the street and watch cars run of over." Squishington says.

"How did you guys end up in a sewer?" asked Jerry Springer.

"One night, it just rained and rained. The town had a massive flood, then the three of us floated away until we ended up in a sewer." Mr. Bumpy says. "Yes, it's true. We've been depressed and down on our luck ever since." Molly Coddle says.

"But at least we're still together right guys!" said Mr. Bumpy. "Nothing can tear us apart!" Squishington added on.

"That's true. Why did this have to happen to us?" Mr. Bumpy whined. "Why couldn't this have happened to someone more deserving like our enemy Destruco!" Squishington cries out.

Jerry Springer asks, "Have you guys ever tried to make a comeback?"

"Every now and then we would come out of the sewers and see if any other networks or animation companies would want us." Molly Coddle says.

"It didn't work out. No matter how hard we try, we can never make a comeback! I even tried to write a book about my life story and hopes it'll become a bestselling novel! No publishers wanted to print it because they told us we were forgotten." Mr. Bumpy says.

"Do you ever believe the television industry will give you guys another chance?" Jerry Springer.

"With social media going on, and networks like Hulu, Amazon Prime, and Netflix, it's impossible." Squishington said. "Nobody watches TV anymore from what we heard." Molly Coddle says.

"That's true. To add insult to injury, Disney took over ABC in 1995 when we were taken off the air." Molly Coddle. "Then nobody wanted us ever again." Mr. Bumpy says.

"Is this why you're here? You want to make a comeback for a new generation?" Jerry Springer wanted to know.

"Yes you bet. Also we want to clean ourselves of our addictions." Squishington says.

"Last time we tried a comeback, we were desparate that we even tried out for a Shakespare play!" Mr. Bumpy said. "Spoiler alert, we bombed!" Squishington said sadly.

"In other words, we need rehab like there's no tomorrow!" Mr Bumpy added on.

"Don't worry you guys, being the friend I am be with you always." Molly Coddle promised who then started to get a guilty look on her face. Jerry Springer soon took notice.

"What's going on, there Molly Coddle." Jerry Springer asked her. "Oh nothing!" Molly Coddle says nervously laughing. The audeince eggs her on to reveal what she is hiding.


"Please stop! It's nothing okay! It's nothing!" Molly Coddle says. "Hey, we came here we confess our problems and addictions." Mr. Bumpy tells Molly Coddle.

"If you're hiding something from us, come clean!" demanded Squishington. "Want to make a comeback or not?" Mr. Bumpy asked her.

"I'll tell after the commercial break." Promised Molly Coddle.

"OKay! We'll go to commercial for now, and maybe we'll know some sordid details from Molly Coddle! What secrets does she have? Is she an alcoholic or a drug addict perhaps? Folks watching at home, don't go anywhere and we'll be right back!" Jerry Springer says.


After the commercial break. Jerry Springer encouraged Molly Coddle to tell the audience on national television her biggest secret. "Before we left, Molly Coddle says she wants to confess something to her friends. What is it, Molly?"

"Well, it's going to be hard to me to get this out in the open but..." Molly Coddle begins.

"That's why you guys are here. If Mr. Bumpy and Squishington can confess, so you can you!" Jerry Springer tells Molly Coddle.

"Okay, here goes. At night, I've been sneaking out of the sewers and...." Molly Coddle started.

"Yes, and.." Mr. Bumpy said. "Why is this taking so long for you to speak up. It can't be that bad." Squishington told Molly Coddle.

"Well, I went out and did some bad things at night...." Molly Coddle says. "What type of bad things?" asked Mr. Bumpy.

"Hmm, what could this be, my faithful viewers? Is Molly Coddle pulling tricks on a street corner?" Jerry Springer asks the audience who then goes, "OOOOOOHHHH!"

"No it's not that Mr. Springer. I'm trying to say is that I was not a very trust worthy friend to Mr. Bumpy and Squishington." Molly Coddle says.

"OOOOOOOOOOHHHH!" The audience hoots once more. "This is what it is. I've been having a love affair." Molly Coddle.

"Love affair! With WHO!?" an angry Mr. Bumpy wanted to know.

"It's not Desctructo is it? If this is true what you're telling us, I bet anything Destructo brainwashed you!" Squishington says.

"No, not Desctructo at all. It's another claymation character." Molly Coddle says.

"Wonder who this secret lover is? Another character who's in claymation?" Jerry Springer tells the audience.

"OOOOOOHHH!" said the audience.

The audience then begins to cheer and hoot. "He promised me that our show will make a comeback for a new generation if I did 'favors' for him. And that's exactly what I have been doing when I was sneaking around." Molly Coddle tells everyone.


"Go ahead, I deserve to be judged." Molly Coddle hang her head in shame. "How could you do such a thing!" Mr. Bumpy asked her. "We're a kid's show! You're not supposed to do stuff like that!" Squishington told her off.

"Molly Coddle, ma'am. You still haven't told us who you are having this fling with." Jerry Springer said.

"About time I came clean. Well, my secret boyfriend who I was having an affair with is......Gumby!" confessed Molly Coddle. The audience bursts in laughter as Mr. Bumpy and Squishington sat in their seats in total shock over what Molly Coddle had told them.

"GUMBY! He's a has been! How was he going to help us get our show back?!" Mr. Bumpy shouted at Molly Coddle.

"You're not going to believe this, but Gumby is here on this show! He saw us on TV and wanted to tell his side of the story! Let's bring out, Gumby!" Jerry Springer announces.

"Maybe Gumby will tell us Molly Coddle was lying, hopefully!" Mr. Bumpy said. Gumby comes onto the stage and joins Molly Coddle, Squishington, and Mr. Bumpy.

"Welcome Gumby! So it is a known fact that Molly Coddle has been in sexual liasions with you?" Jerry Springer asked Gumby.

"Yes that's correct, Mr. Springer sir! Molly Coddle is a good beep! The more she beep me the more their show will come back!" Gumby tells the tale.

"Molly! How could you go behind our backs like this?!" Mr. Bumpy said. Squishington says, "You're dead to us!" "No guys wait!" Molly Coddle said.

Mr. Bumpy and Squishington were headed towards Gumby who was now scared. "Now now now, guys! She came onto me and...." Gumby walks backward.

"You green gum shaped asshole!" Mr. Bumpy yelled as he delivers a punch to Gumby. "Green Gum Shaped? Look who the fuck is talking! What the fuck do you look like!" Gumby fired back!

Squishington and Mr. Bumpy begin to beat up Gumby. Molly Coddle stood there with her hands in her face. "What have I done..."

"Security! Security!" Jerry Springer called out his security guards. The fight between Gumby, Mr. Bumpy, and Squshington continued then the audience chanted, "JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!"

Steve Wilkos pryed Squishington and Mr. Bumpy off of Gumby. "Thank you." said Gumby. "More of that ignorant behavior, and you're all out! You hear me!" Steve Wilkos warned Mr. Bumpy, Squishington, and Gumby.

"Please don't me mad at me you guys. I was only doing what I thought was right." Molly Coddle tells her friends. "Couldn't you have at least earned some type of degree in college, instead of tarting yourself around!" Squishington yelled at Molly Coddle.

"Settle down settle down. You three want some help so I have devised a plan. The three of you are going to be to rehab. Mr Bumpy and Squishington you both will go to Drug Rehab, and Molly Coddle will go to Sex Rehab like the one Tiger Woods went to and...." Jerry Springer was telling Mr. Bumpy, Squishington, and Molly Coddle until he hears of another claymation character coming onto the show.

Coming onto the stage it was Gumby's horse, Pokey. "This is getting juicer by the moment. Washed up cartoons characters with addictions trying to make their way back to the small screen! Not only did Gumby come to the show, now we have his horse Pokey! Let's hear what Pokey has to say when we come back!" Jerry Springer tells his audience and the viewers at home.


"Hey everyone! Back from the commercial break. To those who are just tuning in. The characters from Bump In The Night Who are struggling to get their cartoon back on the air, then had some very interesting yet explicit secrets to reveal to each other. Especially Molly Coddle. Who confessed to sleeping with Gumby. Now we will hear from Pokey!" Jerry Springer says.

Pokey says, "Gumby wasn't the only one who slept with Molly Coddle!" "OH NO! Why Molly Why!" Mr Bumpy begins to cry. "It was the only thing I can do!" Molly Coddle cries out.

"Yes, Pokey is right." Gumby said. "Molly Coddle had a threesome with us!" Pokey joins in.

"SHIT! The Bump In The Night reputation is RUINED!!" Squshington yelled.

"Oh shut up, you guys were never even really that popular in the first place!" Gumby tells off Mr. Bumpy and Squishington.

Pokey implies, "One thing about Molly Coddle is she loved riding me bare back!" "It's true. I won't deny it!" Molly Coddle said.

"You're asking for it now!" Mr. Bumpy said. Squishington and Mr. Bumpy proceed in trying to beat up Gumby and Pokey.

The audience cheers, "JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!"

Another huge fight breaks out between Mr. Bumpy and Squishington and Gumby and Pokey.

The security guards try to break up the fight then get stuck in their clay skin. The security guards now covered in clay all run to take a shower. Mr. Bumpy, Gumby, Pokey, and Squishington were still intact but fighting each other.

Molly Coddle screams, "There you guys go again!" Then a chair was flying on Molly Coddle's direction but she manages to duck and avoid it.

"Oh my gosh!" Jerry Springer exclaimed, "This is going to get me HUGE ratings! I think I'll let this fight go on for a while!"

"JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!" the audience continued to chant.

"You want a ride, Pokey! I'll give you a ride!" Mr. Bumpy yelled as he got a chair and threw it at Pokey's behind. "You hit my horse you asshole!" Gumby shouted as he delivered and packed a whole bunch of punches and kicks on both Squishington and Mr. Bumpy.

"HOW THE FUCK COULD YOU DEFLOWER MOLLY CODDLE!" Mr. Bumpy shouted as he hit Gumby. "SHE'S A BICYCLE! EVERYONE HAS HAD A TURN!" Gumby shouts back and kicking Mr. Bumpy.

"YOU GUYS ARE THE STUPID ONES! DIDN'T YOU KNOW MOLLY CODDLE WAS A LOOSE AND EASY SLUT!" Pokey yelled at Squishington. "Hey audience! How about you guys join in the fight!" Jerry Springer suggests!

Some of the audience members went into the fight. Some were on Mr. Bumpy's and Squishington's side, and some were on Gumby's and Pokey's side.

"Is this going to be like the Twilight movies?" Molly Coddle wondered.

One of the audience members wants to say something to the Bump In The Night characters, "You sir. Would you like to speak?" Jerry Springer asked.

"You guys were my favorite show on ABC! You all digust me now! My childhood is ruined!" the audience speaks into Jerry Springer's microphone. The audience ignored that person and watched, cheered on and joined in on the fight.



The cameraman comes up to Jerry Springer and asks, "Aren't you going to stop this?" "Nah, let them kill each other! The more they fight, the more ratings I get!" Jerry Springer laughs.

The fight eventually stopped when Mr. Bumpy, Squishington, Gumby, and Pokey were all getting tired from beating each other. "GASP! GASP! GASP! GASP!" they all breathed. The cameraman once again walks to Jerry Springer and says, "You are right, sir! Ratings are sky high!"

"YES! I KNEW IT! This is our best show ever! Way better than Naked Peek-A-Boo and Sex Worker Loses His Teeth!" Jerry Springer said with happiness.

After a while, the security guards came back and threw all the guests off the stage. Out in the streets, Mr Bumpy and Squishington confront Molly Coddle.

"Want to know something? If you love Gumby so much, go ahead and have him!" Mr. Bumpy screams at Molly Coddle.

"But....but....he promised..." Molly Coddle stuttered.

"We don't care anymore! We don't want to hear anymore of your bullshit about how you regret what you did! You betrayed us and turned your back on us! GO! GET OUT OF OUR SIGHT!" Squishington says. Walking away all crestfallen and ashamed at the sexual things she did to Gumby and Pokey, Molly Coddle goes back to Gumby and Pokey.

"Forget them. You don't need them!" Pokey said. "Yeah, you're better off with us!" Gumby said. "We'll give you a career!" Pokey promised! "A career you'll never forget!" Mr. Bumpy and Squshington look at Molly Coddle with disbelief, "She has no shame, does she?" asked Squishington. "Guess her regret was all an act." Mr. Bumpy concluded.

Gumby rides on Pokey with Molly Coddle and they take her back with them to Gumbopolis USA. "Yeah that's right, go off with the men you screwed! It's what you're good at!" Mr. Bumpy and Squishington both shout. Gumby, Pokey, and Molly Coddle didn't care and ignored them.

Jerry Springer ends the show with this Final Thoughts, "Washed up cartoon characters. If they want to come back to television, there's better things they could've done. That didn't involve drugs, feces eating, or even sexual favors to another cartoon.. There's no limit to what washed up celebrities let alone forgotten cartoon characters would do to ensure they will win over a new audience. Like I always, take care of yourselves and each other!"

After the show Mr. Bumpy and Squishington went to rehab and overcame their socks and feces addiction only to end up in the sewers again. Molly Coddle ended up doing porno movies with Gumby and Pokey.
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