FicWad

Rated: R

Warning: Heated Moments, Cursing, Violence, and maybe a couple Lemons.

Disclaimer: I own nothing. The people who work and make Fullmetal Alchemist own it.

FYI: Riza's Confessions of a Brigadier General is different from mine, I just couldn't come up with a more snappy title...you'll know what I'm talking about later...
The moon had risen, and it was late at night. Yet the moonlight shined into the tiny hospital room where Fuhrer Roy Mustang sat beside his wife's bed, praying to any god that would listen, and everyone waited outside. They had all been there for a week, hoping for some change, some response. And yes, for a couple of hours they did leave to go to the office and get their paperwork done. But the Fuhrer would stay right there, day and night without fail.
"Just move...do something...anything...show me you're going to be okay..." he pleaded, holding her hand. The monitor showed that she was still alive, and she was breathing perfectly. Tears flooded his eyes, he'd been holding them in forever. "Riza...I'm nothing without you...the reason for my living is gone without you here..." he said, tears rolling down his cheeks. He kissed her hand, and laid his head down on her bed, crying silently.

Riza blinked, and winced as bright hospital lights hit her eyes. She heard crying, and machines going, and people were talking in the hallway. She could barely remember what happened. And when she did, the reality and pain of it all hit her in one big wave, and suddenly she felt like the weakest person in the world as she squeezed her husband's hand. He had never cried before in his life...that she knew of.

"Riza...oh thank god." He said, wiping his eyes and kissing her hand. "D-did I loose the baby?" Riza asked softly, closing her eyes for a minute. Roy gave her a sad smile, and nodded. "They couldn't do anything...the doctors...they said..." Roy said, looking pained. "Roy, what did they say?" Riza asked sharply, sitting up slowly, and taking the water he gave her. "The doctors said...that it's impossible for us to have a baby...because of the damage the gunshot wound did to your womb...they couldn't do anything..." Roy said, not able to meet her eyes.

Riza eyes swam, and she set the cup to the side, and looked down at her hands. "I'm sorry...all I could think about was your safety...and instead I killed our baby and any future babies we could have...its all my fault..." she said, tears running down her cheeks. "No darlin'...it's not. It's his damn fault, he thinks he can get what he wants by making our lives a living hell." Roy said, standing up, and clenching his fists. "I'm going to go tell everyone you're awake." He said quickly. She nodded, and wiped her eyes.

"How are you feeling?" Eve asked a few minutes later, sitting beside her. Everyone but Roy was in the room. "I-I'm fine...I don't think my husband is though...but I guess now that he knows I'm okay... he doesn't need a useless thing like me anymore." Riza said, crossing her arms. "Useless? Riza, you're anything but useless, you saved his life, and you can always get pregnant again!" Amaya protested. "No, I can't! When I took the damn bullet, it did so much damage to my womb that it made it impossible for me to have children. His dream of being Fuhrer and settling down was complete, his next dream was to have children with the woman he loved, and I failed him in that department! I failed him..." Riza said bitterly.

"Don't you dare talk like that! Pity on him if he thinks you're useless, because you're not. Any man would be the luckiest man in the world to have someone like you, Riza. Not many women are willing to sacrifice themselves and there fetus for their lover." Havoc said, looking determined to cheer her up. Riza let out a bitter laugh. "I wish I could believe that." She whispered, looking forlornly down at her hands. "Riza, we're all here for you, we'll be your...uh...sons and daughters...even though some of us are too old...but who cares?" Edward said, laying his head on hers. "Aww head, you short tempered little sweetheart!" Amaya said, kissing his cheek, and hugging Riza.

"My mommy." Eve said, kissing Riza on the cheek, and hugging her. "MY favoritest auntie in the whole wide world." Elicia said, crawling into Riza's lap and laying gently on Riza's stomach. "Hey Mom, what's for dinner?" Fuery asked, kneeling beside the bed. "Mom, can I have a kitty?" Alphonse asked with a smirk. "Mommy, I want a bed time story..." Sheska whispered, sitting on the bed beside her. "Momma, I want a blow-up doll." Havoc joked, and was hit on the head, as he sat beside Sheska. "Mother...I want a pony..." Armstrong said, tears running down his face. "Mom, we want to watch movies." Falman and Breda said together. "Mom, I want to play dress-up." Ross said, kneeling beside the bed. "Mom, I want to commit a crime and have incest with my sister. I want your blessing." Bloch snickered, and was slapped playfully.

"You're all wonderful children. I'll try my best." Riza whispered, drying her eyes as Roy walked in with a rose bouquet. "What the?" he said, and everyone flocked toward him, hugging and latching onto him. "Daddy!" they yelled, looking up at him with shining eyes. "Roy, I believe I just gave birth to 11 kids." Riza laughed, tears in her eyes. "We need a bigger house...and you're all paying rent." Roy said, and everyone laughed. "Crap I feel old, we already have a grandchild on the way." Riza played along. "Naw...we're just a bunch o' rednecks." Amaya said, a big smile on her face. "Hah! Try train hobo's." Havoc said, slapping Ed on the back. "Owww what was that for?" Ed asked.

"For being the short one in the family." Fuery teased. "Ahah! No antagonizing Edo." Roy said, handing Riza the bouquet of roses with a kiss. "Aw damn." Breda said, and pouting. "Daddy is no fun..." Havoc said, hugging on his sister. "You're all a bunch of Incest train Hobo's." Amaya said, latching onto Ed. "You're doing it too..." Eve said, curling up next to Riza. "Well your face." Amaya replied, sitting on the floor.

Two Months Later:
Riza walked down the hallways, picking up random toys, and a blanket, and tossing them into Elicia's room. "God, this house is getting to be too damn small." She said, shutting the door softly, and walking back into the living room to finish sweeping. She had made a full recovery, and everyone stopped acting like they were her kids. Because a). It was to damn weird, and b). It made her feel old. She finished sweeping and lay down on the couch, resting for a minute. Roy and the others had taken Elicia to the park for a while, so she could rest. She shut her eyes, just wanting to rest them, but ended up falling asleep.

An hour later there were was yelling and cursing as the front door opened, and everyone spilled in, Eve, Amaya, Ross, and Sheska crying. "Where's Elicia, what's going on?" she asked, sitting up quickly, pushing her hair back. "God damnit!" Roy said fiercely, slamming his fist into the brick fire mantel. "Roy Mustang, calm yourself down right now, and explain yourself!" Riza scolded him. She got up, and went to the kitchen quickly, bringing back a wet cloth and a bag of ice, and putting them both on his bleeding, bruised knuckles.

"He took her...kidnapped her...my best friends daughter...that son of a bitch...Of all the low down twisted things that slimly shit head has done..." Roy muttered, angry tears welling in his eyes. Riza's body and face remained calm, but her voice didn't. "He...he took her?" she whispered, her eyes welling up. "Right out from under our noses." Havoc said, looking pissed with his hands in his pockets. "This is a fine kettle of fish we've got ourselves into." Eve whispered, wiping her eyes.

"No more...you all get back to HQ, sound the alarm. Tell every State Alchemist and Military officer available that he has a hostage with him now, and if they find him, kill him. Bring Elicia back safe and sound. No more running around with our eyes clouded over. He's going down." Roy said, his eyes hard. Everyone saluted and left quickly, leaving the couple alone.

Roy glared hard at the floor as he went and sat down in the recliner, and Riza walked to the bathroom, coming back out after a minute with bandages and some Neosporin. She kneeled in front of him, his head down, and took his hand lightly, and began to doctor it. "What would Maes say to me, Riza? Do you think he hates me?" Roy asked, his voice sounding dejected and broken. Riza pinned the bandage down lightly, and kissed it. "If I know Maes...he doesn't blame you, Roy. He probably wants to beat the living you know what out of Kellerman right now, just as much as you do." Riza said softly, running a hand through her hair.

"It's so hard... thought it was all going to be a piece of cake. Being at the very top, ruling fairly, having your country and military support you and adore you. Getting married and taking care of a child. I didn't think we'd have so many troubles...I didn't think it would be so hard...everything seems to be slipping out of my control..." Roy confessed. "There's another one..." Riza said, her eye slighting up. "Another what?" Roy asked hollowly.

"You confessed that you had feelings for me...then you confessed that you loved me, and now you confessed that it's not so easy being a Fuhrer. You made two of those Confessions when you were a Brigadier General...and just now...you sort of sounded like you'd rather be a Brigadier General." Riza explained lightly. Roy looked up at her, and smiled sadly. "Sometimes I do wish that...but I'd rather keep this country on the track I've put it on. Keep poverty and war away. I'll sacrifice myself for it if I have to. Would you come with me?" he asked. She pushed the hair out of his face. "You know there's no need to ask." She said, kissing his lips sweetly.

"My soul mate..." he said, wrapping his arms around her. "I'll never give up on you, Brigadier General Mustang, sir." Riza said, and they both laughed. "I'm still Fuhrer, Lieutenant Mustang." He said, kissing her forehead. "You always will be." She whispered, adoration in her eyes.

"There's still no word on his whereabouts. Nobody has seen him...not even a glimpse..." Ross said, making her report. "Thank you, Lieutenant. You may leave." Roy said, waving her away, and looking deeply troubled. It had been two weeks. No word of ransom, nothing had come. Roy stood up and went of the window, looking out at the storm clouds. Thunder rumbled overhead, and the threat of impending rain hung thick in the air.
"It's so hard finding a good man..." Riza said, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "What's that supposed to mean?" Havoc questioned, playing with his Zippo. "It's something I'm writing in my book..." Riza said, writing it down. "Well...what's your book called?" Eve asked. "Confessions Of A Brigadier General." Riza said proudly. "I wanna read it!" Amaya said, sitting up quickly. "Well...it won't be done for a long time I'm afraid...I think I might have to make a trilogy..." Riza said, her forehead creased in concentration.

"Well why's that?" Fuery asked. "Because, it doesn't end until my story ends. It's based off of Roy and me. Names are changed and stuff though..." Riza explained. "It sounds good to me, can I be your editor?" Amaya asked eagerly. "Sure, why not." Riza chuckled, and shivered when a particularly loud CRACK of thunder came, followed by another bright flash of lightning.

"I hate thunderstorms..." Fuery muttered. "I love them." Riza, Eve, and Amaya said together. "Bah. Women are crazy..." Edward said, pushing a loose strand of his golden hair back. "Ed...let me braid it." Amaya begged, and he shook his head fiercely. "You ain't touching my hair woman." He said, poking her. "You're no fun, Edo." Eve complained as the rain started to come down harder. "Wow, it's really coming down out there..." Havoc said as they all looked towards the window where Roy stood. The lunch bell rang and everyone jumped up, rushing out the door quickly, leaving Roy and Riza alone.

"Roy..." she said softly, setting her pen down, and standing up. "I'm not hungry." He said simply. "You didn't eat dinner or breakfast...you have to eat something." Riza said, coming up behind him and looking out the window. "It doesn't seem fair to eat, when she could be starving herself..." Roy said, his voice strained. Riza looked over at him, he had lines on his face, and he was starting to get circles under his eyes. "Roy, you need to quit torturing yourself over this. It's not your fault. We ARE going to find her." Riza said, pleading in her voice. "She probably doesn't get to sleep at night..." Roy said, his voice flat.

"Roy, you have to stop this. Stop it right now." Riza said firmly, trying to keep it together. "What if she's already dead?" Roy asked, his eyes hard. "Don't say things like that! She's alive and we're going to get her back!" Riza said, grabbing him by his shirt. "It's all my fault if she dies...Maes and Gracia put her in my custody..." Roy said. "Damnit, stop it! Can't you hear yourself! Listen to yourself for once Roy. Things can't always be in your control. Maes wouldn't want you to act like this, he'd want you to concentrate more on finding her quicker so those things won't happen! You can't just stand around imagining it all happen." Riza said, her voice broken, and tears welling up in her eyes.

He pulled out of her grip and sat in his chair, putting his head in his hands. She kneeled beside him, and saw pain and fear in his eyes, and he looked ready to just bawl like a baby. 'I have to be strong, if not for myself, then for him. This time it's him who's about to break down.' She thought. She took him into her arms and he curled up in her lap, crying. It was hard to watch such a strong, arrogant, and tough man sit there in your arms and cry. "It's all my fault..." he chocked out, looking pained and meek. "I'm useless...in everything..." he strained, crying more.

Riza pulled him up and took out a tissue, wiping up his face. "Roy Mustang, you are not useless. I don't know what anyone would do half the time in a dangerous situation if we didn't have your special brand of alchemy. And everyone depends on your strategies on the battlefield, and on secret missions. And whenever I feel like giving up, you're there to talk me out of it, and give me support, and lets not forget what you can do in the bedroom. And none of this is your fault, don't you dare think for a minute that it is." She said, looking deep into his eyes.

He put a hand up to her cheek, and cupped it, rubbing his thumb against her soft skin. "I'm nothing without you." He said, and she smiled a sad smile. "Please don't think that Roy. You're a great man, and you bring so much happiness to this country. People depend on you to be here, making everything better." She said, putting her hand over his. "Behind every Great Man, is a Great Woman." Roy said wisely. "Don't flatter me." Riza said, leaning in close.

"But you deserve it," he said, closing the gap and kissing her. "I deserve you, and that's all I need." Riza murmured against his lips. "I love you." He said, biting her lower lips softly. She bit back a moan and kissed him fully, pouring her heart and soul into the kiss, giving him everything she had. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and pulled her closer. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and pressed against him, tears sliding out of her eyes. He pulled back, and looked into her eyes, wiping her tears away.

"Don't cry..." he whispered, running a finger over her lips. "I can't help it...I love you so much." Riza said, her eyes warm and glowing. "Come on, let's go for a walk." Roy said, standing up, and puling her with him. "In the rain!" Riza said, looking at him like he had lost his mind. "Yep, in the rain.." Roy said, a smirk on his face.

A/N: It's a little short...lots of stuff happened....and thank you Kaitlyn for reviewing! I'm glade you're enjoying this story!