Categories > Games > Zelda > Le-Popo's Quest for the Creepy-Looking but Heart-Shaped Mask
Zoras, Pirates, and Emo Fishies, ORLY?
0 reviewsPopo tries to use her super author powers to convince the pirates at Great Bay that ninjas are actually better. Of course, pirates are just too stubborn to listen to that. After calling the one, th...
0Unrated
Chapter 4: Zoras, Pirates, and Emo Fishies, ORLY?
Link and le-Popo have now managed to free two of the Giants, and by now, the audience and Link are even more sick of Popo than the were in the first place.
LINK: Okay, so that fairy said we had to go to the swamp, mountain, ocean, and canyon. That means we have the ocean next, right?
POPO: Yup, congrats on finally figuring something out on your own.
They head for the west gate and then to Great Bay.
LINK: I wanna build a sand castle! Whee!
POPO: Oh no you don't, see those seagulls circling in the air over there?
LINK: Yeah, so?
POPO: Well that's where we're going.
LINK: But I need my water wingies!
POPO: They have candy.
LINK: Let's go!
They swim over to where the seagulls are, where they find a Zora floating in the water.
LINK: I don't see any candy...
POPO: Hey, Mikau! What's up?
MIKAU: Oh, I'm just dying here is all. No need to take me to shore or anything.
LINK: Do you have candy, mister?
MIKAU: Ahem, you do realize that was sarcasm correct?
POPO: Just shut up for a second, Mikau. Link, there wasn't any candy. I just said that because I know you're stupid.
LINK Am not! I have had a very good edumacation.
POPO: Yeah, sure.
LINK: Srsly!
POPO: Orly?
LINK: Yarly.
While they are arguing, Mikau croaks, kicks the bucket, whatever you want to say, he's dead, D-E-D DED.
POPO: Oops...
LINK: So who was that guy, anyway?
POPO: Well you were supposed to heal his soul to get the Zora's mask, but I guess you can't do that now. Oh well.
LINK: You know, thanks to you, I hardly have any of the items, songs, or masks I need. You really managed to screw things up!
POPO: That's what I'm here for!
Popo decides that they're going to go to the Pirate's Fortress even though Link doesn't have the Zora's Mask, because she's just cool like that.
LINK: Wow, those are some sexy pirates....
POPO: Just keep your mini skirt on, we're here to get you an item, since you seem to complain so much about not having them.
LINK: It's not a mini skirt....
They enter the main fortress, where there are lots of guards on patrol.
PIRATE: Halt! What are you doing here? Outsiders like you have no business here!
POPO: Oh, we're not here.
PIRATE: What?
POPO: You can't see us.
PIRATE: I... can't... see... you...
POPO: Ninjas are better than pirates.
PIRATE: S... T... F... U...
POPO: Well I guess it can only work so well, come on, Link.
LINK: You are strange...
Popo uses her mad ninja skillz to sneak through the rest of the fortress, because ninjas are better than pirates. Eventually, they reach the room where the pirates' leader is.
AVEIL, OR WHATEVER THE HELL HER NAME WAS: You need to get those eggs back! What would people say if they heard that the pirates lost their treasure?? We'd be a laughing stock! Besides, have you seen the cloud around Great Bay Temple? Those eggs are the way in! And if we get in...
PIRATE: Great treasures are sure to follow! Hey, wait, who are those people hanging from the ceiling in a very conspicuous way?
POPO: Ha! You have keen vision to have been able to see through this ingenious disguise! I challenge you!
LINK: Your disguise was a black tablecloth. And you don't have a weapon.
Popo drops down from the ceiling.
POPO: Oh. Right. Well, I'll think of something.
AUDIENCE: Those words, I hate those words coming from her....
The pirate pulls out her swords and starts attacking Popo. A light bulb pops up above Popo's head, Popo grabs the lightbulb and throws it at the pirate.
POPO: Lol, I have dangerous ideas.
AUDIENCE: In more ways than one...
The pirate starts attacking Popo again, and this time she reaches behind her back and pulls out, the one and only, original, ORLY OWL, with 1001 catch phrases created by hopeless internet users with no originality.
AUDIENCE: Okay, this takes things to a whole new level of stupidity.
POPO: Y HELLO THAR! Nice weather today, isn't it?
ORLY OWL: Quite Rly.
PIRATE: What the hell is that?
POPO: So did you watch the superbowl last year?
ORLY OWL: GO PHLY!
PIRATE: I'm talking to you!
ORLY OWL: ARRR RLY.
LINK: .....
POPO: Lol, amusing as always, I see.
ORLY OWL: Oh, Silly!
PIRATE: Why aren't you listening to me??
POPO: No need to be sad...
ORLY OWL: Emo Rly?
All of the pirates in the room start going insane, and run out screaming
POPO: Oh, thanks for helping then, see you later!
ORLY OWL: Fo sho, rly.
The owl disappears.
LINK: I'm not even going to ask.
POPO: Great, then just open the treasure chest.
Link opens the treasure chest and gets the hookshot, /again/.
LINK: So what's this about eggs?
POPO: We don't care.
LINK: I feel like all of my decisions are being made for me lately...
They leave the Pirate's Fortress and head to Zora Hall.
POPO: Hey, you. Can you tell me where Lulu is?
ZORA: Oh, Lulu? She's been acting weird lately.
POPO: I know that, but where is she?
ZORA: She sells sea shells by the sea shore.
LINK: Sea sells she shells by the she sore?
POPO: No, she sells sea shells by the sea shore.
LINK: She sore?
POPO: No, /sea shore/, ugh, whatever, you're hopeless, let's just go.
Le-Popo drags Link outside to Zora cape, where Lulu is.
LINK: Oh, hi! I'd like to buy some sea shells please?
LULU: ............
LINK: I thought you sold sea shells...
LULU: .................
POPO: Just ignore her, we're going to ride this big turtle to Great Bay Temple.
LINK: What big turtle?
POPO: That island there.
LINK: The island is a turtle?
POPO: The turtle is an island.
LINK: Orly?
POPO: Yarly.
LINK: Nowai!
AUDIENCE: You use this in your parodies waaay too much.
POPO: Well yeah, we have to find some way to wake it up without using the New Wave Bosa Nova....
LINK: You mean you skipped the song again?
POPO: I skipped the song again.
LINK: RAWR! You suck!
POPO: Don't worry, I'll think of something....
LINK: Oh dear.
POPO: OH LOOKIE HERE! I FOUND ONE OF MR. TURTLE'S BLACK LACE THONGS!
Suddenly there is a huge splash in the water, and a large turtle with two palm trees on its shell is in front of them.
TURTLE: WHERE?! WHERE DID YOU FIND THOSE?!
POPO: Haha, made you look!
AUDIENCE: Ugh...
POPO: We need you to take us to Great Bay Temple.
TURTLE: If you say so...
The turtle takes them through the whirlwind surrounding Great Bay Temple safely, and drops them off there.
LINK: Can't we actually play through and get me an item this time?
POPO: Nope. I let you get the hookshot, stop with all the whining, geez.
Popo transports them to the boss room, a platform surrounded by water.
TEXT: Gargantuan Masked Fish GYORG
POPO: Lol, that's one ugly fish!
GYORG: You. Stop degrading me. I am, in fact, quite attractive.
POPO: Not exactly, you're a giant fish with huge teeth.
GYORG: Don't hate me because I'm beautiful!
POPO: No, I hate you because you're not beautiful. That, and last time I played, my game kept freezing up and I had to beat you three times. h4t3!!1!
GYORG: Nobody loves me!
POPO: Yup, you're the most-hated boss on all of the webforums I visit.
Gyorg pulls out a gun and shoots himself.
POPO: Emo Fabulous!
The victory music plays again, and another heart container appears, which Popo gets to before Link /again/.
LINK: I hate you...
POPO: But there's nothing you can do about it is there? Haha.
They step into the portal and go to Disneyland! Yay!
Not really.
GIANT: Oh, hello! Would you like to stay and chat for a bi-
POPO: Okay, let's get going.
Link and Popo go back to reality.
POPO: And guess what time it is?
LINK: Time to go home....
AUDIENCE: Time to get a new author....
POPO: No, sillies! It's Song of Time time!
LINK: Ugh...
POPO: NOW!!
Link plays the Song of Time and he and Popo land back in Clock Town.
POPO: Lolz, this is fun!
LINK: Not in the least...
End Chapter 4
**************************
Disclaimer: Le-Popo does not own Nintendo or any of it's characters, or any of the people/characters mentioned in this parody, but if she did, she'd be pretty darn rich >:D
**************************
Notes: Popo loves this game. Too much. But as with all things she loves, she has to make fun of it :D
Unlike the last parody, this one will have more than one chapter, and will eventually cover the whole game (so yes, lots and lots of spoilers) but of course, it will be funnier :D
A lot of this will not make sense if you haven't played the game.
Of course, if Popo is feeling lazy or is getting negative feedback, she will not complete the parody D: (because what's the point if people don't like it?)
**************************
Link and le-Popo have now managed to free two of the Giants, and by now, the audience and Link are even more sick of Popo than the were in the first place.
LINK: Okay, so that fairy said we had to go to the swamp, mountain, ocean, and canyon. That means we have the ocean next, right?
POPO: Yup, congrats on finally figuring something out on your own.
They head for the west gate and then to Great Bay.
LINK: I wanna build a sand castle! Whee!
POPO: Oh no you don't, see those seagulls circling in the air over there?
LINK: Yeah, so?
POPO: Well that's where we're going.
LINK: But I need my water wingies!
POPO: They have candy.
LINK: Let's go!
They swim over to where the seagulls are, where they find a Zora floating in the water.
LINK: I don't see any candy...
POPO: Hey, Mikau! What's up?
MIKAU: Oh, I'm just dying here is all. No need to take me to shore or anything.
LINK: Do you have candy, mister?
MIKAU: Ahem, you do realize that was sarcasm correct?
POPO: Just shut up for a second, Mikau. Link, there wasn't any candy. I just said that because I know you're stupid.
LINK Am not! I have had a very good edumacation.
POPO: Yeah, sure.
LINK: Srsly!
POPO: Orly?
LINK: Yarly.
While they are arguing, Mikau croaks, kicks the bucket, whatever you want to say, he's dead, D-E-D DED.
POPO: Oops...
LINK: So who was that guy, anyway?
POPO: Well you were supposed to heal his soul to get the Zora's mask, but I guess you can't do that now. Oh well.
LINK: You know, thanks to you, I hardly have any of the items, songs, or masks I need. You really managed to screw things up!
POPO: That's what I'm here for!
Popo decides that they're going to go to the Pirate's Fortress even though Link doesn't have the Zora's Mask, because she's just cool like that.
LINK: Wow, those are some sexy pirates....
POPO: Just keep your mini skirt on, we're here to get you an item, since you seem to complain so much about not having them.
LINK: It's not a mini skirt....
They enter the main fortress, where there are lots of guards on patrol.
PIRATE: Halt! What are you doing here? Outsiders like you have no business here!
POPO: Oh, we're not here.
PIRATE: What?
POPO: You can't see us.
PIRATE: I... can't... see... you...
POPO: Ninjas are better than pirates.
PIRATE: S... T... F... U...
POPO: Well I guess it can only work so well, come on, Link.
LINK: You are strange...
Popo uses her mad ninja skillz to sneak through the rest of the fortress, because ninjas are better than pirates. Eventually, they reach the room where the pirates' leader is.
AVEIL, OR WHATEVER THE HELL HER NAME WAS: You need to get those eggs back! What would people say if they heard that the pirates lost their treasure?? We'd be a laughing stock! Besides, have you seen the cloud around Great Bay Temple? Those eggs are the way in! And if we get in...
PIRATE: Great treasures are sure to follow! Hey, wait, who are those people hanging from the ceiling in a very conspicuous way?
POPO: Ha! You have keen vision to have been able to see through this ingenious disguise! I challenge you!
LINK: Your disguise was a black tablecloth. And you don't have a weapon.
Popo drops down from the ceiling.
POPO: Oh. Right. Well, I'll think of something.
AUDIENCE: Those words, I hate those words coming from her....
The pirate pulls out her swords and starts attacking Popo. A light bulb pops up above Popo's head, Popo grabs the lightbulb and throws it at the pirate.
POPO: Lol, I have dangerous ideas.
AUDIENCE: In more ways than one...
The pirate starts attacking Popo again, and this time she reaches behind her back and pulls out, the one and only, original, ORLY OWL, with 1001 catch phrases created by hopeless internet users with no originality.
AUDIENCE: Okay, this takes things to a whole new level of stupidity.
POPO: Y HELLO THAR! Nice weather today, isn't it?
ORLY OWL: Quite Rly.
PIRATE: What the hell is that?
POPO: So did you watch the superbowl last year?
ORLY OWL: GO PHLY!
PIRATE: I'm talking to you!
ORLY OWL: ARRR RLY.
LINK: .....
POPO: Lol, amusing as always, I see.
ORLY OWL: Oh, Silly!
PIRATE: Why aren't you listening to me??
POPO: No need to be sad...
ORLY OWL: Emo Rly?
All of the pirates in the room start going insane, and run out screaming
POPO: Oh, thanks for helping then, see you later!
ORLY OWL: Fo sho, rly.
The owl disappears.
LINK: I'm not even going to ask.
POPO: Great, then just open the treasure chest.
Link opens the treasure chest and gets the hookshot, /again/.
LINK: So what's this about eggs?
POPO: We don't care.
LINK: I feel like all of my decisions are being made for me lately...
They leave the Pirate's Fortress and head to Zora Hall.
POPO: Hey, you. Can you tell me where Lulu is?
ZORA: Oh, Lulu? She's been acting weird lately.
POPO: I know that, but where is she?
ZORA: She sells sea shells by the sea shore.
LINK: Sea sells she shells by the she sore?
POPO: No, she sells sea shells by the sea shore.
LINK: She sore?
POPO: No, /sea shore/, ugh, whatever, you're hopeless, let's just go.
Le-Popo drags Link outside to Zora cape, where Lulu is.
LINK: Oh, hi! I'd like to buy some sea shells please?
LULU: ............
LINK: I thought you sold sea shells...
LULU: .................
POPO: Just ignore her, we're going to ride this big turtle to Great Bay Temple.
LINK: What big turtle?
POPO: That island there.
LINK: The island is a turtle?
POPO: The turtle is an island.
LINK: Orly?
POPO: Yarly.
LINK: Nowai!
AUDIENCE: You use this in your parodies waaay too much.
POPO: Well yeah, we have to find some way to wake it up without using the New Wave Bosa Nova....
LINK: You mean you skipped the song again?
POPO: I skipped the song again.
LINK: RAWR! You suck!
POPO: Don't worry, I'll think of something....
LINK: Oh dear.
POPO: OH LOOKIE HERE! I FOUND ONE OF MR. TURTLE'S BLACK LACE THONGS!
Suddenly there is a huge splash in the water, and a large turtle with two palm trees on its shell is in front of them.
TURTLE: WHERE?! WHERE DID YOU FIND THOSE?!
POPO: Haha, made you look!
AUDIENCE: Ugh...
POPO: We need you to take us to Great Bay Temple.
TURTLE: If you say so...
The turtle takes them through the whirlwind surrounding Great Bay Temple safely, and drops them off there.
LINK: Can't we actually play through and get me an item this time?
POPO: Nope. I let you get the hookshot, stop with all the whining, geez.
Popo transports them to the boss room, a platform surrounded by water.
TEXT: Gargantuan Masked Fish GYORG
POPO: Lol, that's one ugly fish!
GYORG: You. Stop degrading me. I am, in fact, quite attractive.
POPO: Not exactly, you're a giant fish with huge teeth.
GYORG: Don't hate me because I'm beautiful!
POPO: No, I hate you because you're not beautiful. That, and last time I played, my game kept freezing up and I had to beat you three times. h4t3!!1!
GYORG: Nobody loves me!
POPO: Yup, you're the most-hated boss on all of the webforums I visit.
Gyorg pulls out a gun and shoots himself.
POPO: Emo Fabulous!
The victory music plays again, and another heart container appears, which Popo gets to before Link /again/.
LINK: I hate you...
POPO: But there's nothing you can do about it is there? Haha.
They step into the portal and go to Disneyland! Yay!
Not really.
GIANT: Oh, hello! Would you like to stay and chat for a bi-
POPO: Okay, let's get going.
Link and Popo go back to reality.
POPO: And guess what time it is?
LINK: Time to go home....
AUDIENCE: Time to get a new author....
POPO: No, sillies! It's Song of Time time!
LINK: Ugh...
POPO: NOW!!
Link plays the Song of Time and he and Popo land back in Clock Town.
POPO: Lolz, this is fun!
LINK: Not in the least...
End Chapter 4
**************************
Disclaimer: Le-Popo does not own Nintendo or any of it's characters, or any of the people/characters mentioned in this parody, but if she did, she'd be pretty darn rich >:D
**************************
Notes: Popo loves this game. Too much. But as with all things she loves, she has to make fun of it :D
Unlike the last parody, this one will have more than one chapter, and will eventually cover the whole game (so yes, lots and lots of spoilers) but of course, it will be funnier :D
A lot of this will not make sense if you haven't played the game.
Of course, if Popo is feeling lazy or is getting negative feedback, she will not complete the parody D: (because what's the point if people don't like it?)
**************************
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