Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Dance To This Beat && Hold A Lover Close
[[Update]] I'll start off by thanking you guys for the reviews; your guys are like awesome. And yeah, sorry for the wait if any of you have been waiting for me to put out another chapter. If you haven't and you are just reading this because you're bored, read away...
It was about a month later; Adam and me had gotten to know each other since he "saved" me. We had kissed, and were now hanging out on a daily basis, but I wasn't sure if you would call us an "item" or not. Quite frankly, I was afraid to ask, or more like afraid to get turned down.
I was sitting in my room just hanging around; talking to Adam on the phone. It was later, nearly two in the morning. Just then I heard a loud knocking on my front door. Confused as to who would be at my door this hour, I got up, stretched slightly, and made my way towards my door.
"Hey Adam, can I call you right back?" I asked as I approached the door, "Someone just rang the doorbell."
"Who would be at your door this time of night?" he took a pause, "Just be careful, ok? I'm right down the hallway if you need anything."
"Alright, I will", I said. "I'll call you back."
As I clicked the phone off, I opened the door and was surprised, and almost furious to see Ryan standing there hopelessly. "Ryan?" I asked confused.
Like he did every time before, he walked in like he owned the place and began pacing through the living room like something was truly bothering him. "Haylee please", he said desperately, "That night...that night we both said things that we didn't mean." He took a pause. "Chelsea, she's holding out on me.... and.... and I really miss you."
He began approaching me like we could just picked up where we left off; like nothing had changed at all; but I pushed him away quickly. "Whoa, Ry...no", I said confused, still trying to comprehend what was going on. "I met someone; someone...great."
He put his hand on my shoulder and began rubbing it softly. "Haylee, so what", he said sweetly as he began moving closer. "It doesn't mean that we can't do anything. I mean you've only been seeing him for like a week tops." He took a pause. "I mean me and Chelsea have been together for almost a year now, and we still..."
I cut him off. "Ryan, I'm sorry, but you really have to leave." I took a pause. "Me and Adam, we're happy. I don't want a demented, broken up relationship like you and Chelsea have."
He looked almost offended, "Haylee, what the fuck is that suppose to me?" he asked.
I began walking into the kitchen, "All I'm saying is that you're cheating on her; she's probably doing the same to you. I don't want that with me and Adam." I took a pause, thinking about how I wasn't even sure if Adam and me were a "we". Either way I sure as hell didn't want to end up back with Ryan living in some surreal, sick, twisted version of hell. "And I also don't want to be the other girl, second best. For once I want to be some ones first priority."
He walked in after me and grabbed my arm forcefully, "I don't like being turned down, Haylee", he said sternly. I was quite surprised to feel the strength of Ryan frail, weak-looking arms, which in reality were quite strong and left a pain in my arm.
"Let go of me", I replied also sternly, almost testing him. I wasn't afraid of him, not anymore. The past few weeks I had been thinking about it, and there wasn't anything more Ryan could do to hurt me as badly as he did.
He had already killed me once, it's not happening again
He took my arm and practically dragged me into my bedroom. I struggled along as he pulled me onto the bed. "Take off your clothes!" he yelled furiously. I sat there, almost as if I hadn't ever heard his demand. He came up and hit me across the face when he noticed I wasn't going to fallow his orders.
"Don't touch me", I said, "don't ever fucking touch me!" The second time I practically screamed it.
Ryan nearly ran close to me and covered my mouth forcefully with his hand as he began removing me clothing. I tried screaming, squirming, punching, but nothing seemed to work, and before I knew it Ryan and me were both completely naked.
Now I had to admit, I was scared; too scared to move in fact. How could this have been the same boy who I had cried myself to sleep over countless nights; who I had fallen so madly in love with; the boy who I had dreamed about so many times before? He took his hands, cold as ice, and spread my legs apart as I just trembled in fear. He roughly pushed his body against my soft, pasty white flesh as tears began escaping from my soft blue eyes and rolled down the sides of my face.
I was wrong, he could kill me; he just did... again
After fifteen minutes or so of indescribable pain, I heard my house phone begin to ring. "That's Adam, Ry", I cried. "You have to leave. His apartment is just down the hallway." It was practically a lie seeing as Adam probably wouldn't come in and make sure I was ok just because I didn't answer. I mean, for all he knew, I could have done something as innocent as fallen asleep.
Ryan just sat there and smiled sinisterly like the fucking jack ass he was as he continued to pump himself in and out and in, "When he gets here I'll take care of it", he said. "That is, if he cares enough to even come and check on you."
From then on the night was a blur; an awful, surreal blur
The next morning I woke up alone lying in bed. My entire body was aching in constant pain from the night before, and the annoying, beeping sound of the phone was ringing right next to me on the side table.
I reached tiredly for the phone, clicked it on and pushed it slightly against my ear, "Hello?" I answered.
"Hey gorgeous", a familiar, and annoyingly cheerful voice said. It was Adam. "How come you never called me back last night? I tried you a few times too, but no one answered." He took a pause waiting for a reply. When it didn't happen he continued. "Did you just fall asleep or something?"
"Or something", I said softly as I squeezed my pillow tightly. "Hey Adam...do you think you could come over?"
"Yeah, right now?"
"Yeah, I'm in bed, I don't feel too well or else I would go over there myself. But my front doors opened and I just really need to talk to you", I said softly into the receiver.
"Okay, I'll be over in a second", he said as he clicked the phone off and the sound of the dial tone began, signifying that the line had gone dead. My voice must have shown fear, for he sounded rather concerned.
It wasn't more then a few minutes later when I heard my front door open and loud footsteps beginning to walk towards my room. It wasn't more then a moment later Adam walking into my room slowly and sat down beside me. "Hey gorgeous", he said sweetly as he removed a stray piece of hair from my eyes.
"Hey you", I said weakly as I forced a fake smile. "How are you?"
"I don't know...cant complain I guess", he said as he lay down next to me. "But what about you? You didn't sound too hot over the phone."
"Yeah, I know, that's what I wanted to talk about", I said. As I took a pause, expecting something from Adam, I was forced to continue as he just lay there waiting for me to finish. "Well...last night...Ryan came to the door", I said softly.
"Ryan as in ass-hole guitar player and back up singer of Panic! At The Disco?" he asked almost surprised. "What the hell was he doing here?"
I began to think of how I only told Adam a version of the truth about Ryan's and my former relationship. I told him that we were friends in a way, but he treated me like shit and caused me to nearly kill myself. "Well.... he came here.... expecting something", I said as I tried to think up a way to tell Adam.
"Well...what did he want Haylee?" he asked.
"He came here...and...and he hurt me, Adam", I said softly making sure the tears wouldn't escape from my eyes.
He's not worth your tears; he never was
It was about a month later; Adam and me had gotten to know each other since he "saved" me. We had kissed, and were now hanging out on a daily basis, but I wasn't sure if you would call us an "item" or not. Quite frankly, I was afraid to ask, or more like afraid to get turned down.
I was sitting in my room just hanging around; talking to Adam on the phone. It was later, nearly two in the morning. Just then I heard a loud knocking on my front door. Confused as to who would be at my door this hour, I got up, stretched slightly, and made my way towards my door.
"Hey Adam, can I call you right back?" I asked as I approached the door, "Someone just rang the doorbell."
"Who would be at your door this time of night?" he took a pause, "Just be careful, ok? I'm right down the hallway if you need anything."
"Alright, I will", I said. "I'll call you back."
As I clicked the phone off, I opened the door and was surprised, and almost furious to see Ryan standing there hopelessly. "Ryan?" I asked confused.
Like he did every time before, he walked in like he owned the place and began pacing through the living room like something was truly bothering him. "Haylee please", he said desperately, "That night...that night we both said things that we didn't mean." He took a pause. "Chelsea, she's holding out on me.... and.... and I really miss you."
He began approaching me like we could just picked up where we left off; like nothing had changed at all; but I pushed him away quickly. "Whoa, Ry...no", I said confused, still trying to comprehend what was going on. "I met someone; someone...great."
He put his hand on my shoulder and began rubbing it softly. "Haylee, so what", he said sweetly as he began moving closer. "It doesn't mean that we can't do anything. I mean you've only been seeing him for like a week tops." He took a pause. "I mean me and Chelsea have been together for almost a year now, and we still..."
I cut him off. "Ryan, I'm sorry, but you really have to leave." I took a pause. "Me and Adam, we're happy. I don't want a demented, broken up relationship like you and Chelsea have."
He looked almost offended, "Haylee, what the fuck is that suppose to me?" he asked.
I began walking into the kitchen, "All I'm saying is that you're cheating on her; she's probably doing the same to you. I don't want that with me and Adam." I took a pause, thinking about how I wasn't even sure if Adam and me were a "we". Either way I sure as hell didn't want to end up back with Ryan living in some surreal, sick, twisted version of hell. "And I also don't want to be the other girl, second best. For once I want to be some ones first priority."
He walked in after me and grabbed my arm forcefully, "I don't like being turned down, Haylee", he said sternly. I was quite surprised to feel the strength of Ryan frail, weak-looking arms, which in reality were quite strong and left a pain in my arm.
"Let go of me", I replied also sternly, almost testing him. I wasn't afraid of him, not anymore. The past few weeks I had been thinking about it, and there wasn't anything more Ryan could do to hurt me as badly as he did.
He had already killed me once, it's not happening again
He took my arm and practically dragged me into my bedroom. I struggled along as he pulled me onto the bed. "Take off your clothes!" he yelled furiously. I sat there, almost as if I hadn't ever heard his demand. He came up and hit me across the face when he noticed I wasn't going to fallow his orders.
"Don't touch me", I said, "don't ever fucking touch me!" The second time I practically screamed it.
Ryan nearly ran close to me and covered my mouth forcefully with his hand as he began removing me clothing. I tried screaming, squirming, punching, but nothing seemed to work, and before I knew it Ryan and me were both completely naked.
Now I had to admit, I was scared; too scared to move in fact. How could this have been the same boy who I had cried myself to sleep over countless nights; who I had fallen so madly in love with; the boy who I had dreamed about so many times before? He took his hands, cold as ice, and spread my legs apart as I just trembled in fear. He roughly pushed his body against my soft, pasty white flesh as tears began escaping from my soft blue eyes and rolled down the sides of my face.
I was wrong, he could kill me; he just did... again
After fifteen minutes or so of indescribable pain, I heard my house phone begin to ring. "That's Adam, Ry", I cried. "You have to leave. His apartment is just down the hallway." It was practically a lie seeing as Adam probably wouldn't come in and make sure I was ok just because I didn't answer. I mean, for all he knew, I could have done something as innocent as fallen asleep.
Ryan just sat there and smiled sinisterly like the fucking jack ass he was as he continued to pump himself in and out and in, "When he gets here I'll take care of it", he said. "That is, if he cares enough to even come and check on you."
From then on the night was a blur; an awful, surreal blur
The next morning I woke up alone lying in bed. My entire body was aching in constant pain from the night before, and the annoying, beeping sound of the phone was ringing right next to me on the side table.
I reached tiredly for the phone, clicked it on and pushed it slightly against my ear, "Hello?" I answered.
"Hey gorgeous", a familiar, and annoyingly cheerful voice said. It was Adam. "How come you never called me back last night? I tried you a few times too, but no one answered." He took a pause waiting for a reply. When it didn't happen he continued. "Did you just fall asleep or something?"
"Or something", I said softly as I squeezed my pillow tightly. "Hey Adam...do you think you could come over?"
"Yeah, right now?"
"Yeah, I'm in bed, I don't feel too well or else I would go over there myself. But my front doors opened and I just really need to talk to you", I said softly into the receiver.
"Okay, I'll be over in a second", he said as he clicked the phone off and the sound of the dial tone began, signifying that the line had gone dead. My voice must have shown fear, for he sounded rather concerned.
It wasn't more then a few minutes later when I heard my front door open and loud footsteps beginning to walk towards my room. It wasn't more then a moment later Adam walking into my room slowly and sat down beside me. "Hey gorgeous", he said sweetly as he removed a stray piece of hair from my eyes.
"Hey you", I said weakly as I forced a fake smile. "How are you?"
"I don't know...cant complain I guess", he said as he lay down next to me. "But what about you? You didn't sound too hot over the phone."
"Yeah, I know, that's what I wanted to talk about", I said. As I took a pause, expecting something from Adam, I was forced to continue as he just lay there waiting for me to finish. "Well...last night...Ryan came to the door", I said softly.
"Ryan as in ass-hole guitar player and back up singer of Panic! At The Disco?" he asked almost surprised. "What the hell was he doing here?"
I began to think of how I only told Adam a version of the truth about Ryan's and my former relationship. I told him that we were friends in a way, but he treated me like shit and caused me to nearly kill myself. "Well.... he came here.... expecting something", I said as I tried to think up a way to tell Adam.
"Well...what did he want Haylee?" he asked.
"He came here...and...and he hurt me, Adam", I said softly making sure the tears wouldn't escape from my eyes.
He's not worth your tears; he never was
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