Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > The Bass Files: Parallel Universe
A list, some bad grammar and fate takes its toll
9 reviewsWhy should you read this? Pro: More references to boost your egos. Con: Pete´s ego.
1Original
34. A list, some bad grammar and fate takes its toll*
Love hurts. That was the wittiest and truest thing that the guys had scribbled onto my cast. Coming from Joe, by the way.
It was true for more reasons than just having fallen out of a tree while watching the stars with Andy. It was true because I also started to doubt my feelings for him.
I guessed it was time for a pro and con list because things are lot easier when you try to see them in matters of black and white. I think that´s probably why cows would never go out of style.
Pro: Andy was the sweetest guy I ever met and he was into me.
Con: I haven´t met a lot of guys yet and Andy was also into being dominated by me.
Pro: Andy had a good job and could take proper care of himself.
Con: I had a good job myself and he didn´t take very proper care of me when we were up in the tree.
Pro: He got a great sense of humor.
Con: My life was funny enough, thank you.
Pro: His friends liked me.
Con: His friends included Pete... Just kidding. Even though I was kinda jealous that he had succeeded in sneaking his way into the band and getting along swell with all of the dudes.
Pro: ...
I´d continue with the pros as soon as something came to mind.
Con: His vegan food was a joke.
Con: His attitude during our fight was a joke.
Con: I didn´t feel butterflies in my stomach anymore when he was around.
I guessed that was the answer. I wanted them goddamn butterflies. So bad.
The meanie hadn´t even called and it´s been two days since our beef.* Maybe I should just call him anyways. I didn´t like holding grudges.
I mean I still did. I just didn´t like it very much.
_ _ _ _ _
"HA! How do you like them (duck)apples?" Joe almost screamed when laying down a word that scored him 18 points, plus 50 extra ones for having used up all of his letters.
"God, I hate Scrabble. Why are we even playing this?" Andy whined.
We had kind of made up again. Couldn´t say we had a serious talk about what had happened though. He´s been sort of bitchy ever since. But I was just too tired to pick a fight now. Maybe I had been overreacting with the list. I mean he was a pretty nifty guy, all in all.
"FUCK! I hate this," Andy yelled.
All in all. On the whole. You know what I mean, right? Everyone can have a bad day. Or a sick fetish in bed. Or an insane diet. Where was I?
"I pass. Can´t put down anything," my boyfriend grumbled and exchanged some letters.
"Check this out," Patrick grinned. "I´m taking Sheena´s ´land´ and turning it into..." He added some letters.
"´Clandestine´?! What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Pete demanded.
"Pretty much the opposite of your ´Hello, world. I´m Pete Wentz. Love me.´ attitude," Patrick explained, matter-of-factly.
"Awesome word, Trickster," I acknowledged.
Andy grunted, "Since when are you calling him ´Trickster´?"
I shrugged, "Can´t remember... Since five seconds ago?"
Joe picked up on the tension between us and eyed us for a moment.
"I think the Trickster´s cheating," Pete said.
"Yes," Patrick nodded, "I am. I´m using my brain."
"Oh, burn," CeC- Joe said.
I smiled at the dorks. Forget Andy. I didn´t need him to have a good time.
_ _ _ _ _
When I arrived at Andy´s I was met with Joyce and Patrick who were just heading out the door. I was wondering how they were getting along. I had been so caught up in my own relationship thoughts that I hadn´t even found the time to catch up with Patrick. (I wondered if somebody** has thought of making ´Shitty friend´ t-shirts yet.)
"Wow, you smell good," Joyce said, as she passed me by.
Patrick grinned, "Strawberries are ace."
"Thanks," I mumbled and was about to close the door behind me.
"Patrick, you were totally flirting with her..." I heard Joyce complaining as they walked towards her car. He totally was not.
Patrick just sighed. Poor guy. DOJ.*
"Hey, Sheena," Andy looked genuinely happy to see me. He gave me a peck on the lips. Well, I couldn´t say I hadn´t missed that.
"Hey, Andy," I smiled at him. I was willing to stop analyzing things and just see where this was gonna take us.
"Hm, what´s that smell?" He sniffed on my neck.
I smiled even brighter, "It´s this new strawberry body lotion I use."
Ha, that was surely gonna drive him wild. And then we could have normal sex without any horse-back riding accessories or gimmicks used for mountaineering trips.
He rolled his eyes, "Awful. I hate that smell."
"What?"
"I´m allergic to strawberries and only the smell of them makes me wanna throw up."
Well, thanks for breaking it to me gently.
_____________________
* This counts as a cow reference. Just for the record.
** Somebody strange.
* Dumb, over-possessive Joyce.
Love hurts. That was the wittiest and truest thing that the guys had scribbled onto my cast. Coming from Joe, by the way.
It was true for more reasons than just having fallen out of a tree while watching the stars with Andy. It was true because I also started to doubt my feelings for him.
I guessed it was time for a pro and con list because things are lot easier when you try to see them in matters of black and white. I think that´s probably why cows would never go out of style.
Pro: Andy was the sweetest guy I ever met and he was into me.
Con: I haven´t met a lot of guys yet and Andy was also into being dominated by me.
Pro: Andy had a good job and could take proper care of himself.
Con: I had a good job myself and he didn´t take very proper care of me when we were up in the tree.
Pro: He got a great sense of humor.
Con: My life was funny enough, thank you.
Pro: His friends liked me.
Con: His friends included Pete... Just kidding. Even though I was kinda jealous that he had succeeded in sneaking his way into the band and getting along swell with all of the dudes.
Pro: ...
I´d continue with the pros as soon as something came to mind.
Con: His vegan food was a joke.
Con: His attitude during our fight was a joke.
Con: I didn´t feel butterflies in my stomach anymore when he was around.
I guessed that was the answer. I wanted them goddamn butterflies. So bad.
The meanie hadn´t even called and it´s been two days since our beef.* Maybe I should just call him anyways. I didn´t like holding grudges.
I mean I still did. I just didn´t like it very much.
_ _ _ _ _
"HA! How do you like them (duck)apples?" Joe almost screamed when laying down a word that scored him 18 points, plus 50 extra ones for having used up all of his letters.
"God, I hate Scrabble. Why are we even playing this?" Andy whined.
We had kind of made up again. Couldn´t say we had a serious talk about what had happened though. He´s been sort of bitchy ever since. But I was just too tired to pick a fight now. Maybe I had been overreacting with the list. I mean he was a pretty nifty guy, all in all.
"FUCK! I hate this," Andy yelled.
All in all. On the whole. You know what I mean, right? Everyone can have a bad day. Or a sick fetish in bed. Or an insane diet. Where was I?
"I pass. Can´t put down anything," my boyfriend grumbled and exchanged some letters.
"Check this out," Patrick grinned. "I´m taking Sheena´s ´land´ and turning it into..." He added some letters.
"´Clandestine´?! What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Pete demanded.
"Pretty much the opposite of your ´Hello, world. I´m Pete Wentz. Love me.´ attitude," Patrick explained, matter-of-factly.
"Awesome word, Trickster," I acknowledged.
Andy grunted, "Since when are you calling him ´Trickster´?"
I shrugged, "Can´t remember... Since five seconds ago?"
Joe picked up on the tension between us and eyed us for a moment.
"I think the Trickster´s cheating," Pete said.
"Yes," Patrick nodded, "I am. I´m using my brain."
"Oh, burn," CeC- Joe said.
I smiled at the dorks. Forget Andy. I didn´t need him to have a good time.
_ _ _ _ _
When I arrived at Andy´s I was met with Joyce and Patrick who were just heading out the door. I was wondering how they were getting along. I had been so caught up in my own relationship thoughts that I hadn´t even found the time to catch up with Patrick. (I wondered if somebody** has thought of making ´Shitty friend´ t-shirts yet.)
"Wow, you smell good," Joyce said, as she passed me by.
Patrick grinned, "Strawberries are ace."
"Thanks," I mumbled and was about to close the door behind me.
"Patrick, you were totally flirting with her..." I heard Joyce complaining as they walked towards her car. He totally was not.
Patrick just sighed. Poor guy. DOJ.*
"Hey, Sheena," Andy looked genuinely happy to see me. He gave me a peck on the lips. Well, I couldn´t say I hadn´t missed that.
"Hey, Andy," I smiled at him. I was willing to stop analyzing things and just see where this was gonna take us.
"Hm, what´s that smell?" He sniffed on my neck.
I smiled even brighter, "It´s this new strawberry body lotion I use."
Ha, that was surely gonna drive him wild. And then we could have normal sex without any horse-back riding accessories or gimmicks used for mountaineering trips.
He rolled his eyes, "Awful. I hate that smell."
"What?"
"I´m allergic to strawberries and only the smell of them makes me wanna throw up."
Well, thanks for breaking it to me gently.
_____________________
* This counts as a cow reference. Just for the record.
** Somebody strange.
* Dumb, over-possessive Joyce.
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