Categories > Cartoons > X-Men: Evolution > No Rain
No Rain
Chapter 7: Aftermath
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In the weeks after the ill-fated mission that left Scott Summers and Jean Grey deeply scared in many, both young mutants were left rebuild with little help. Jean stayed in the medical bays with Scott while he healed from his extensive injuries and seldom left his side. Scott was confined to the medical quarters for quite some time as Beast and the Professor helped him heal from his physical wounds relatively quickly. However, the internal wounds...The wounds that could not be seen even by a telepath like the Professor...Were left untreated. Jean never talked about the rape and Scott never talked about the torture he endured under the Friends of Humanity. Only when they were alone together and nobody else was around did they ever talk about it. They did their best to support each other in this dark time knowing that it would be harder than ever to keep up the 'perfect' act that they so hated.
The rest of the students at the Xavier Institute did little to help. If anything, they made it worse by asking questions about the whole ordeal and badgering them about the rumors that had continually circulated about their private lives. In addition to the fresh memories of the mission, their long dormant psychological ailments went from simple surges here and there...To all out relapses. This was made harder by the fact that they had to hide these very serious problems from the prying eyes of the others while trying to deal with them at the same time. In the end, Scott Summers and Jean Grey pretty much shut themselves out from the rest of the team. As the days passed...Scott and Jean grew increasingly depressed. Nightmares about the mission were unending now and tormented them every time they tried to sleep. Now, they had both succumbed to all out withdraw from the world around them. This act, however, only added to the growing concern of the Professor and his fellow teachers about his first two students.
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Ororo Munroe had been searching high and low throughout the institute for Scott and Jean. But wherever they were, they were doing a pretty good job of hiding themselves from the others. Like the Professor and Hank, she had been eager to talk to them about the mission that had gone so horribly wrong...But getting to speak to them in the first place was challenging enough. As she made her way through the hallways for what seemed like the third time around in her search, she came across Logan as he returned from a danger room session.
"Logan, have you seen Scott and Jean around? I can't find them anywhere," said the weather goddess, hoping Logan could help.
"Nope...Haven't seen them all day. Why are you lookin' for them anyway?" asked Logan, weary of where this was going.
"They missed their checkup with Hank this morning. That, and I was hoping to talk to them about something."
"Ro...You know how those two feel about physical checkups."
"But it's Hank. They trust him," argued Ororo.
"Yeah, but that still doesn't change how they feel about it. Remember how hard it was for Hank the first time?"
Ororo shuddered at the memory. When Scott and Jean had arrived at the institute all those years ago, they were far from healthy to say the least. They were pale, undernourished, and even physically wounded. She remembered how Scott had a bullet wound on his side and Jean had dozens of festering scratch marks on her back. And even though this caused them a great deal of discomfort risked becoming infected, they still were unwilling to allow Hank to look at them. Every time somebody touched them, be it a doctor or anybody else, they began to panic and in some cases hyperventilate. In the end it took three weeks to get them to allow Hank to properly treat them, but that was a long time ago...It was supposed to be in the past.
"Of course I remember Logan...I couldn't forget about that even if I tried. But that was years ago...I thought they had put that kind of thing behind them. I mean...They have really improved a lot over the years and I thought they had moved on."
Logan contemplated what to say next. As much as he wanted to believe Ororo's words, he knew otherwise. He could sense more around Scott and Jean just by looking at them. He had known them both long enough to see the subtleties of their actions. Whether or not Ororo or the Professor saw it was something he could only guess upon. But from the looks of it, they hadn't noticed the kind of things that he had.
"Just give em time Ro...Remember, that mission really left an impact. I was there...And so were you. And those two just need some time to deal with it," said Logan, hoping that he was right.
The weather goddess simply sighed as listened to Logan's advice. It wasn't very hopeful in any respect for Scott and Jean. But she still wanted to do something...Even if she was somewhat unsure of what she should do.
"I still want to help them, Logan. I don't want them to bottle everything up. We need to help them confront this. I can't stand to see them go through this alone..."
And with that, Ororo turned around and resumed her search. This only left Logan to ponder what was going to happen next. He knew that normal logic said that Scott and Jean needed to talk about this issue. But this wasn't a normal issue that they had to deal with...In fact, it was far from it. And going about this problem in the same way would either do nothing or make it worse. But there was still one thing that Ororo had negated when she expressed her concern about their first students. They weren't going through this alone...
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While the rest of the institute was left to ponder their absence, Scott and Jean stayed out of sight on the outskirts of the mansion overlooking the lake. This had always kind of been 'their spot' since their early years at the institute. And now, with the environment they lived in getting increasingly complicated with each passing day...They found themselves spending more and more time on this spot with each other in order to escape from the unending scrutiny of the others.
It was now high noon as the two young mutants sat atop a hill overlooking the lake. They were both silent as they both watched the sparkling waters under the sunlight and casually smoked cigarettes in an effort to calm their nerves. What was once a rare occurrence was fast becoming an all out habit. In the weeks since the ill-fated mission, Scott and Jean found themselves smoking more and more in an effort to escape from the act that was now harder than ever. But they didn't care...They had bigger problems in their lives to worry about.
"You think Ororo is still looking for us?" asked Scott as he took a small drag off his cigarette.
"Probably," scoffed Jean, knowing her persistence whenever it concerned them, "She's still been hounding me about having a physical. I can't believe she hasn't taken a damn hint by now!"
Jean swallowed her bitterness as she took another lung full of smoke. She knew Ororo was only trying to help...But she seriously needed stop and think about her course of action in dealing with them.
"At least she's not as bad as the others," said Scott as he took another drag off his cigarette. "I heard the Professor tell everyone that the mission was a dud, mainly so they won't worry about dealing with the Friends of Humanity again...But they still won't stop asking me so many stupid questions about it! It's always 'Hey Scott, why so down? Was the mission not exciting enough for you?' or 'Hey Scott, you should feel lucky that it was that easy!' Ha! easy my ass!"
Scott then proceeded to flick his cigarette butt off to the side and soon, but he promptly lit another one. It was hot out and it didn't help that he was wearing more clothing than he should have for this time of year. But he still had a few small bandages from his injuries and scars that he didn't want the others to see. The wounds still stung even though they had healed for the most part, and hiding them didn't do much to help.
"Sometimes I wish we could just up and tell them...Just to see the look on their faces," added Scott as he tried to rub the pain in his head away.
"Yeah, like they'd even believe us," said Jean somewhat bitterly as she lit another cigarette.
Scott could only sigh, knowing that was probably true. They had put on the 'perfect' act for so long now that it would be pretty hard from them to see them any other way. Even though they hated that act with a passion, it had now gotten to a point where there was no going back on it. With this in mind, a brief silence came over the young couple as they contemplated their situation.
"The Professor still wants us to have some 'counseling' sessions with him later on," said Scott as he took a long drag off his cigarette.
"God, does he think talking about it is the answer to everything?!" said Jean with an exasperated tone. "Does someone as intelligent as him ever stop and think that just maybe I don't want to talk about being raped?!"
"But you talk about it with me," reminded Scott as he scooted closer to her in an effort to calm her down.
"That's different, Scott...That's because I trust you...You understand how it feels. You know what it's like...To be beaten...Tortured...And raped...And..."
Jean struggled getting out those last words, knowing that it wasn't a pleasant thing for bother her and Scott to hear. In response, Scott could only sigh in admittance as he took a particularly long drag of his cigarette.
"Yeah well...It's not like it's something that hasn't happened to me before."
Through their link she could feel the sting of his wounds fester. She gently rested her head against his shoulder, which helped relieve some of the pain...But didn't change their situation for the better.
A prolonged silence then came over them as they both finished their cigarettes and flicked them in to the air. They still didn't want to go back to the institute, knowing how everyone would just keep giving them a hard time. But Scott and Jean would have to confront them sooner or later...They just wanted it to be later for now. Either way, it all seemed so hopeless for them and there seemed to be little that could be done about it.
"Jean...Why don't I take you out tonight? You know...To get our minds focused on something else."
Jean shifted her gaze back towards Scott's face where she simply looked him in the eye through his ruby-quartz glasses. Even though they were covered and she could only see her reflection, it was as if she could see right past them and in to the eyes of her soul mate.
"You sure you want to do that with all the scrutiny around the mansion?"
"If you don't care...Then neither do I," said Scott, managing to smile ever so briefly.
That got Jean to smile as well as they shared a short, but passionate kiss.
"It's a date," said Jean, feeling a little better now.
When their lips parted, they stayed close...Still not wanting to go back to the mansion. For now, they wanted to delay the inevitable confrontation between them and the others. Even though it would have to be done sooner or later, it still didn't make it any easier to think about. But for now, they didn't focus on that. There would be plenty of time to worry about that later...But for now, they lived in the moment...Unsure of what the near future would bring.
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They spent much of the afternoon on that same hill overlooking the lake. Occasionally, they talked about some of the conflicting things that were causing them so much turmoil, but most of the time they simply sat in a blissful silence. In this picturesque area there was so much less conflict compared to the mansion. And they wanted to enjoy it for as long as they could.
As the evening hours drew near, they eventually returned...Doing their best to avoid confronting the others. But in a house the size of the Xavier Institute and with so many students, that proved difficult to say the least. In the end, Scott and Jean stayed barricaded in their rooms until the time for their date came. Thankfully, Ororo had given her search a rest for the time being and most of the other students were stuck running a danger room session that Logan had organized at the last minute. It was finally a stroke of luck in their favor as they planned to leave just before dinner to avoid the others for the time being.
By the time six rolled around, they both prepared to leave on their date and planned not to return until everybody else was asleep. This wasn't some elaborately planned romantic evening...This was just a way of getting away from it all and trying to focus the few things that they had to cherish. However, it was hard to do so when they were so deeply depressed. It wasn't going to undo what had happened to them or make all the pain they felt lessen...But for Scott and Jean, it was more than enough in this time conflict.
Most of the afternoon and evening sessions were ending as Jean stood before her mirror brushing her hair. She knew Scott was waiting for her, but she wanted to look presentable even though this was a supposed to be a casual affair. As she continued to mend her hair, she looked at herself in the pale reflection. Many years worth of conflict seemed to show in her eyes as the hollow look on her own face seemed to tell the memory of a million nightmares. Nobody else saw it...Not through the veil of "Miss Perfect" that she had used to cover herself all these years. The longer she put on the act...The more difficult it became to maintain because that truly wasn't who she was. As she became lost in her reflection, she heard a sudden knock on the door.
"Red, you in there?" said a gruff voice.
Jean immediately recognized it as Logan's voice and she tried not to panic. But knowing that this was Logan and not Storm or the Professor, she kept herself from getting too stressed out. Not wanting to shut out the man who had helped raise her, she finally answered.
"Come in..."
As the door opened, she turned and faced him. He was no longer in his uniform, but he did look somewhat concerned.
"You goin' out tonight?" asked the Canadian mutant casually, not bringing up her absence for most part of the day.
"Yes...Just out on a date with Scott," she answered.
Much to her relief, Logan simply nodded, not going any farther or asking too many questions. He had come to trust her after all these years and the same thing went for Scott. While part of him wanted to discuss their shift in behavior over the past month, he knew they weren't ready for that just yet.
"Well...Try to have fun, okay?"
Jean managed to smile back at him, thankful he wasn't bringing up the obvious conflict that was making her and Scott so anxious lately.
"Thank you, Logan."
Even though Wolverine wasn't one to show a whole lot of emotion...He did somewhat return her smile.
"Most of the others are still in the basement changing...But the rest are in the living room waiting for dinner. If ya go around them through the dining room, ya should be able to avoid them."
And with that, he made his leave...Not asking anything about where they had been this afternoon and not even once mentioning the mission. Jean Grey couldn't help but feel grateful towards him after it seemed like everyone else in the mansion wanted to talk to them about it. Even the Professor didn't seem to understand the difficulty. So it was a welcome sight to have Logan understand their feelings somewhat better...And he wasn't even psychic. Not wanting to lose their window, Jean quickly left to meet up with Scott. Apparently, Logan paid him a visit as well and they both made their way out towards the garage through the path that he had given them. Thankfully, nobody stopped to confront them and Scott and Jean were able to make their getaway for a night with each other that they hoped would help them forget about all the terrible conflict...Even if it was only briefly.
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As the sun began to set over the horizon, Scott and Jean pulled in to a small diner that they had eaten at many times before. Much of the trip was marked with silence as the young couple was just glad to get out of the mansion and away from the prying eyes of the rest of the team. While Logan seemed to be the only one who somewhat understood, there was only so much he could do in the end. They knew they would be forced to confront the others and the Professor about the rumors and the mission...But that didn't make it any easier for them.
Soon, they both sat down in a small booth in the moderately crowded diner...Eager to secure one moment of peace without being scrutinized or forced to act perfect. Upon ordering, they both busied themselves with casual conversation which did help distract them from the overall conflicts that had plagued them incessantly.
"I wonder why Logan helped us earlier," asked Scott as they waited for their food. "Normally, I'd expect the standard lecture that Ororo had given us yesterday."
"I don't know...I was just as surprised as you were when he came in my room and didn't ask too many questions," replied Jean who was truly doing her best to relax for the night.
"Yeah, I halfway expected him to tear in to me like he did anybody who wanted to date you," said Scott somewhat jokingly as the overall mood around the couple began to lighten.
"Come on Scott, you're probably the last guy he'd do that to. I mean...He knows you just as well as he knows me. And you should be glad he trusts you."
"It's strange because he always acted like he never trusted anybody," replied Scott with a light laugh.
"Well, I think he has a bigger heart than he likes to show. You know he has to keep up his 'Wolverine' bit around the others."
"Yeah, I know how that feels..."
They continued to talk, avoiding the events of the past month. As hard as these things were to forget, for a brief moment they were pushed off to the side. It was the first time in quite a while they could do something like this and it was a much welcomed feeling. As their conversation continued, their food arrived and they began to eat.
However, their relaxed mood was soon shattered when a rowdy group of boys entered the diner and started heading in their direction. Looking over to see what the commotion was, a new feeling of dread came over them as they identified them as Duncan and his posse.
'Oh no...Not this...Not this,' said Jean in her mind as she shuddered at the thought of being in Duncan's presence again sent chills down her spine.
Scott tried to calm her, but his efforts soon proved useless as Duncan identified them from afar and made his way over towards them. He was still wearing his Bayville jacket even though he was in college now under an athletic scholarship. And he looked as self-centered and cocky as ever.
"Well, well, well; if it isn't the freak couple of Bayville," said Duncan as he walked up to Scott and Jean's booth with a snide grin on his face.
"What do you want Duncan?" said Jean bitterly, not liking how close he was to her at this point.
"What, I can't come in here for a bite to eat?"
"My sentiments exactly Matthews, now either leave us alone or leave," responded Scott as he got up from his seat.
"What's a matter Summers? Something crawl up your ass and die or is Jean still being a prude little bitch?" laughed the blond-haired jock.
Duncan was really pushing it this time around. Scott could take being teased, taunted, and annoyed...But whenever somebody insulted Jean like that, it was something he could not take. He had a powerful urge to rip of his glasses and blow him away like he had done the Friends of Humanity guards that murdered those innocent mutant children and tried to rape Jean. But soon, he was stopped by another voice.
"Don't call me that Duncan!" yelled Jean as she too got up. By now, this conflict had drawn the attention of other nearby customers as they watched the spectacle unfold before them. "I took enough of your bullshit when we were together! I don't need to take any more of it since I dumped your sorry ass!"
"Funny, the way I remembered it...It is me that dumped you," said Duncan confidently despite Jean's rage.
"You...Tried...To...RAPE me!" said Jean in a stern voice.
"No I didn't! You just chickened out because you're too damn prude. And now you're with a loser like Summers because you just don't put out what you advertise..."
"Watch it, asshole!" said Scott as he grabbed Duncan by the shirt collar with rage in his eyes.
"What are you gonna do about it you boy-scout freak? Blow me away? Beat me up? Yeah I'm sure that'll look good for mutants everywhere...And I'm sure that hippie Professor would appreciate that."
Nothing would have pleased Scott more than to blow this idiot away once and for all. Jean too seemed unable to contain her anger as she wanted to let every agonizing emotion she had suppressed out with a vengeance. But through it all...And in plain view of all the other diners that were watching this unfold before them...Scott Summers and Jean Grey forced themselves to lock it all away once again and soon they backed off.
"Yeah, I thought so..." said Duncan with a snide grin.
That just earned him an angry look from Scott as he put down money for the meal and proceeded to leave.
"Come on Jean, let's go...This place is starting to stink."
Jean desperately wanted to unleash her anger upon this boy who had done nothing more except add on to the pain that was her life...But she knew she couldn't...She knew that 'little miss perfect' couldn't do that because of how it would effect others. So she simply followed Scott...Bottling it up all inside her.
As the left, Scott took one last look at Duncan and contemplated hitting him with just one optic blast. After what he had done to Jean, he struggled to hold himself back...But in the end he had to do what any 'Mr. X-man role model' would do...Walk away. As they both got in to Scott's car and sped off as far away from the diner as possible...A heavy silence fell over them as the cool nighttime air blew around them. A sickening feeling developed in the pit of each of their stomachs. The strain of suppressing so much inner pain was beginning to talk its toll on the young couple. Jean tried to hide the tears in her eyes...But couldn't as Duncan's venomous words began to act like poison in her mind. Scott reached over and took her hand in an effort to combat it, but it only tore him up more seeing the look of pain on her face. There were a lot of things that they both wanted to forget. But so far...The fates seemed against them as they were forced to endure more and more pain and having to suppress it with each passing moment as it welled up inside them...
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For what seemed like an hour, they just drove around Bayville...Never stopping anywhere, not having any destination in mind. It was as if they were trying to drive away from their problems...But they still followed them no matter where they went. Soon, Scott and Jean all but gave up and parked the car on a cliff overlooking Bayville in the distance. Nobody else was around and they finally had a chance to be alone. Many of their dates had ended in secluded places like this...Where they could stop being the upstanding 'perfect' role models and just be themselves for once. And tonight was particularly bad. They had rumors back at the institute, Duncan Matthews back in Bayville, and the lingering pain of the horrible mission that had been haunting them like a nightmare for the last month. It was hard enough dealing with everything before these things had happened...Now, it was uncertain if they could even go on much longer living like this.
Sitting on the hood of Scott's car, both young adults began smoking cigarettes while they reflected on everything that had happened to them within the last month. Ever since the institute started recruiting more students, they had done well hiding the pain of the early years. But learning to live with others had devolved in to putting on an act that only made things worse. Part of this act was due to the wishes of Professor Xavier, but another part of it was them running from bad memories. In the end, it had only made things worse as their mental scars began to fester like never before.
"Some night this has turned out to be," muttered Scott as he took a puff from his cigarette, "I'm sorry it had to be like this Jean."
"It's not your fault Scott...That's just our luck I guess," replied Jean as took a long drag off her cigarette.
"Yeah...But when does it run out?" said Scott as he rubbed the temples of his head, "First it was that damn rumor, then the mission, now this...When does it all stop, Jean? Why does it seem like every fate in the universes is against us?"
Jean could only sigh as those and many other questions surged through her mind. But as she pondered them, she felt no closer to an answer than Scott.
"I wish I knew..." said Jean as she flicked her cigarette in to the air. "God I wish I knew..."
Soon, she felt tears well up in her eyes and a sickening feeling in the pit of her stomach. With nobody around to put an act on for...Bottled up feelings were now unleashed in a wave of sobs. Jean didn't fight these tears...In the end she didn't want to. She just wanted to let it all out. It wasn't long before she collapsed in Scott's arms and just cried her pain out. Seeing the woman he loved cry made Scott lose control of his own emotions. He wanted to make all her pain go away. He wanted to tell her it would be okay...But he soon became too choked up to speak. For so long he was always a man who bottled up everything inside...Trying to make it all go away. But with nobody around to fool...He soon felt tears of his own forming in his eyes. Unable to fight them, he just held Jean close to him while he let them out in wave after wave of painful sobs. The rumor, the hazing from Duncan, and the unspeakable torture he endured under the Friends of Humanity all stung like a thousand knives. And without the others to make their lives more difficult...They could let it all out for the first time in a very long while.
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Scott and Jean stayed at that one secluded spot for several hours. They had no desire to go somewhere else where they would have to act in their old 'perfect' ways. They had no desire to hear the endless snickers and ridicule from the rest of the team and people like Duncan Matthews. So they simply stayed at the cliff for hours, letting all their bottled up emotions go...All the anger, pain, and sadness that they were forced to endure. But after a long while and with the hour of the night getting ever later, they knew they had to return to the institute.
It was past midnight when they reluctantly started heading back. Hopefully, most of the mansion was sound asleep by this hour, or if anything, too tired to hound them any further. They took the long way home, hoping to delay the inevitable. Time soon became a fuzzy haze as they finally arrived back at the darkened institute. From the looks of it, much of the inhabitance was fast asleep in this late hour. But even after the car had stopped and they had parked in the garage, the young couple just lingered for a bit...Reflecting on the turmoil of this night and the last month of their already painful lives.
"I'm sorry that this night didn't turn out like we had hoped Jean," said Scott, finally breaking the silence.
"It doesn't matter..." said Jean as she looked back in to his eyes through the glasses he was always forced to wear, "As long as it was with you..."
Scott swallowed the lump in his throat upon hearing her say that. Her words helped make him feel better like they always had in the past for as long as they had known each other.
"I wish I could do more for you Jean..." said Scott in a voice thick with emotion.
"You don't have to, Scott," said Jean as she moved in closer to him, "You've already done so much...More than I can ever thank you for."
And with that, she captured his lips in a deep kiss. No amount of pain or inner wounds could taint something as pure as this. In the end it made this night worth while even though it was riddled with difficulty.
"I don't want to sleep alone tonight," said Jean as they both stayed in an embrace.
"Then you won't have to."
As they reluctantly parted, they made their way back in to the mansion. There was nobody else around at this hour and the vast halls of the institute were dead silent. The only person who was still awake at this hour was Logan, but he did nothing to impede the young couple much to their thanks. As they made their way up to Scott's room, they took turns changing in to lighter sleeping clothes. And as this dramatic night finally came to a close, they slipped in to the cool bed sheets. It wasn't long before Jean found her way in to Scott's arms and soon, they were both locked in another passionate kiss. This time, the kiss was much deeper than the previous one. Jean's arms were wrapped around Scott's neck as she continued to absorb the warm feeling of being with someone she loved so much. Soon, her hands began to trace gentle patterns along Scott's chest, enjoying the feeling of his firm muscles underneath the shirt he was wearing. Scott too, lost himself in the passion of the moment as he gently traced his hands down the curves of Jean's body. Her legs were now wrapped around his waist as they stayed in the warmth of this one single moment of peace. Their mind link was now a lot more open than usual, warm feelings and thoughts seemed to meld in a sense as the feeling of love and content helped calm their weary nerves.
Part of them wanted to go further...Part of them wanted to make this night complete. But exhaustion, stress, and a slew of bad memories that still couldn't be fully suppressed soon caused them to stop. Hopefully, the time would come soon enough...But for now, Scott Summers and Jean Grey were just trying to get through each day even as it got harder and harder to do. But as they lay there in each other's arms, that feeling of warmth set them at ease...Even if it was only briefly. And as they both started drifting off in to a world of sleep...Scott managed to say a few more words to Jean as he gently stoked the side of her face.
"I love you..." said Scott as he placed one last kiss on her forehead.
"I love you too," said Jean softly.
And with that, they both fell asleep.
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AN: Well, that's it for now. Man, Scott and Jean just can't seem to get a break, can they? But fear not! Another chapter soon awaits them! But from the looks of it, their luck won't get much better. I know this chapter was kind of dark, but it's kind of how the story pans out. I'm sorry if it was a little slow at some points, but I really wanted to go in to the emotional parts for the sake intrigue. Other than that, what do you all think? Do you like it? Please send me your reviews via email or post them on the fanfiction website! I'd love to know what you think and I'm open to all criticism! There's plenty of more Scott/Jean ahead! So I hope you like it and thank you very much for reading!
DON'T LEAVE! PLEASE REVIEW!
Chapter 7: Aftermath
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In the weeks after the ill-fated mission that left Scott Summers and Jean Grey deeply scared in many, both young mutants were left rebuild with little help. Jean stayed in the medical bays with Scott while he healed from his extensive injuries and seldom left his side. Scott was confined to the medical quarters for quite some time as Beast and the Professor helped him heal from his physical wounds relatively quickly. However, the internal wounds...The wounds that could not be seen even by a telepath like the Professor...Were left untreated. Jean never talked about the rape and Scott never talked about the torture he endured under the Friends of Humanity. Only when they were alone together and nobody else was around did they ever talk about it. They did their best to support each other in this dark time knowing that it would be harder than ever to keep up the 'perfect' act that they so hated.
The rest of the students at the Xavier Institute did little to help. If anything, they made it worse by asking questions about the whole ordeal and badgering them about the rumors that had continually circulated about their private lives. In addition to the fresh memories of the mission, their long dormant psychological ailments went from simple surges here and there...To all out relapses. This was made harder by the fact that they had to hide these very serious problems from the prying eyes of the others while trying to deal with them at the same time. In the end, Scott Summers and Jean Grey pretty much shut themselves out from the rest of the team. As the days passed...Scott and Jean grew increasingly depressed. Nightmares about the mission were unending now and tormented them every time they tried to sleep. Now, they had both succumbed to all out withdraw from the world around them. This act, however, only added to the growing concern of the Professor and his fellow teachers about his first two students.
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Ororo Munroe had been searching high and low throughout the institute for Scott and Jean. But wherever they were, they were doing a pretty good job of hiding themselves from the others. Like the Professor and Hank, she had been eager to talk to them about the mission that had gone so horribly wrong...But getting to speak to them in the first place was challenging enough. As she made her way through the hallways for what seemed like the third time around in her search, she came across Logan as he returned from a danger room session.
"Logan, have you seen Scott and Jean around? I can't find them anywhere," said the weather goddess, hoping Logan could help.
"Nope...Haven't seen them all day. Why are you lookin' for them anyway?" asked Logan, weary of where this was going.
"They missed their checkup with Hank this morning. That, and I was hoping to talk to them about something."
"Ro...You know how those two feel about physical checkups."
"But it's Hank. They trust him," argued Ororo.
"Yeah, but that still doesn't change how they feel about it. Remember how hard it was for Hank the first time?"
Ororo shuddered at the memory. When Scott and Jean had arrived at the institute all those years ago, they were far from healthy to say the least. They were pale, undernourished, and even physically wounded. She remembered how Scott had a bullet wound on his side and Jean had dozens of festering scratch marks on her back. And even though this caused them a great deal of discomfort risked becoming infected, they still were unwilling to allow Hank to look at them. Every time somebody touched them, be it a doctor or anybody else, they began to panic and in some cases hyperventilate. In the end it took three weeks to get them to allow Hank to properly treat them, but that was a long time ago...It was supposed to be in the past.
"Of course I remember Logan...I couldn't forget about that even if I tried. But that was years ago...I thought they had put that kind of thing behind them. I mean...They have really improved a lot over the years and I thought they had moved on."
Logan contemplated what to say next. As much as he wanted to believe Ororo's words, he knew otherwise. He could sense more around Scott and Jean just by looking at them. He had known them both long enough to see the subtleties of their actions. Whether or not Ororo or the Professor saw it was something he could only guess upon. But from the looks of it, they hadn't noticed the kind of things that he had.
"Just give em time Ro...Remember, that mission really left an impact. I was there...And so were you. And those two just need some time to deal with it," said Logan, hoping that he was right.
The weather goddess simply sighed as listened to Logan's advice. It wasn't very hopeful in any respect for Scott and Jean. But she still wanted to do something...Even if she was somewhat unsure of what she should do.
"I still want to help them, Logan. I don't want them to bottle everything up. We need to help them confront this. I can't stand to see them go through this alone..."
And with that, Ororo turned around and resumed her search. This only left Logan to ponder what was going to happen next. He knew that normal logic said that Scott and Jean needed to talk about this issue. But this wasn't a normal issue that they had to deal with...In fact, it was far from it. And going about this problem in the same way would either do nothing or make it worse. But there was still one thing that Ororo had negated when she expressed her concern about their first students. They weren't going through this alone...
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While the rest of the institute was left to ponder their absence, Scott and Jean stayed out of sight on the outskirts of the mansion overlooking the lake. This had always kind of been 'their spot' since their early years at the institute. And now, with the environment they lived in getting increasingly complicated with each passing day...They found themselves spending more and more time on this spot with each other in order to escape from the unending scrutiny of the others.
It was now high noon as the two young mutants sat atop a hill overlooking the lake. They were both silent as they both watched the sparkling waters under the sunlight and casually smoked cigarettes in an effort to calm their nerves. What was once a rare occurrence was fast becoming an all out habit. In the weeks since the ill-fated mission, Scott and Jean found themselves smoking more and more in an effort to escape from the act that was now harder than ever. But they didn't care...They had bigger problems in their lives to worry about.
"You think Ororo is still looking for us?" asked Scott as he took a small drag off his cigarette.
"Probably," scoffed Jean, knowing her persistence whenever it concerned them, "She's still been hounding me about having a physical. I can't believe she hasn't taken a damn hint by now!"
Jean swallowed her bitterness as she took another lung full of smoke. She knew Ororo was only trying to help...But she seriously needed stop and think about her course of action in dealing with them.
"At least she's not as bad as the others," said Scott as he took another drag off his cigarette. "I heard the Professor tell everyone that the mission was a dud, mainly so they won't worry about dealing with the Friends of Humanity again...But they still won't stop asking me so many stupid questions about it! It's always 'Hey Scott, why so down? Was the mission not exciting enough for you?' or 'Hey Scott, you should feel lucky that it was that easy!' Ha! easy my ass!"
Scott then proceeded to flick his cigarette butt off to the side and soon, but he promptly lit another one. It was hot out and it didn't help that he was wearing more clothing than he should have for this time of year. But he still had a few small bandages from his injuries and scars that he didn't want the others to see. The wounds still stung even though they had healed for the most part, and hiding them didn't do much to help.
"Sometimes I wish we could just up and tell them...Just to see the look on their faces," added Scott as he tried to rub the pain in his head away.
"Yeah, like they'd even believe us," said Jean somewhat bitterly as she lit another cigarette.
Scott could only sigh, knowing that was probably true. They had put on the 'perfect' act for so long now that it would be pretty hard from them to see them any other way. Even though they hated that act with a passion, it had now gotten to a point where there was no going back on it. With this in mind, a brief silence came over the young couple as they contemplated their situation.
"The Professor still wants us to have some 'counseling' sessions with him later on," said Scott as he took a long drag off his cigarette.
"God, does he think talking about it is the answer to everything?!" said Jean with an exasperated tone. "Does someone as intelligent as him ever stop and think that just maybe I don't want to talk about being raped?!"
"But you talk about it with me," reminded Scott as he scooted closer to her in an effort to calm her down.
"That's different, Scott...That's because I trust you...You understand how it feels. You know what it's like...To be beaten...Tortured...And raped...And..."
Jean struggled getting out those last words, knowing that it wasn't a pleasant thing for bother her and Scott to hear. In response, Scott could only sigh in admittance as he took a particularly long drag of his cigarette.
"Yeah well...It's not like it's something that hasn't happened to me before."
Through their link she could feel the sting of his wounds fester. She gently rested her head against his shoulder, which helped relieve some of the pain...But didn't change their situation for the better.
A prolonged silence then came over them as they both finished their cigarettes and flicked them in to the air. They still didn't want to go back to the institute, knowing how everyone would just keep giving them a hard time. But Scott and Jean would have to confront them sooner or later...They just wanted it to be later for now. Either way, it all seemed so hopeless for them and there seemed to be little that could be done about it.
"Jean...Why don't I take you out tonight? You know...To get our minds focused on something else."
Jean shifted her gaze back towards Scott's face where she simply looked him in the eye through his ruby-quartz glasses. Even though they were covered and she could only see her reflection, it was as if she could see right past them and in to the eyes of her soul mate.
"You sure you want to do that with all the scrutiny around the mansion?"
"If you don't care...Then neither do I," said Scott, managing to smile ever so briefly.
That got Jean to smile as well as they shared a short, but passionate kiss.
"It's a date," said Jean, feeling a little better now.
When their lips parted, they stayed close...Still not wanting to go back to the mansion. For now, they wanted to delay the inevitable confrontation between them and the others. Even though it would have to be done sooner or later, it still didn't make it any easier to think about. But for now, they didn't focus on that. There would be plenty of time to worry about that later...But for now, they lived in the moment...Unsure of what the near future would bring.
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They spent much of the afternoon on that same hill overlooking the lake. Occasionally, they talked about some of the conflicting things that were causing them so much turmoil, but most of the time they simply sat in a blissful silence. In this picturesque area there was so much less conflict compared to the mansion. And they wanted to enjoy it for as long as they could.
As the evening hours drew near, they eventually returned...Doing their best to avoid confronting the others. But in a house the size of the Xavier Institute and with so many students, that proved difficult to say the least. In the end, Scott and Jean stayed barricaded in their rooms until the time for their date came. Thankfully, Ororo had given her search a rest for the time being and most of the other students were stuck running a danger room session that Logan had organized at the last minute. It was finally a stroke of luck in their favor as they planned to leave just before dinner to avoid the others for the time being.
By the time six rolled around, they both prepared to leave on their date and planned not to return until everybody else was asleep. This wasn't some elaborately planned romantic evening...This was just a way of getting away from it all and trying to focus the few things that they had to cherish. However, it was hard to do so when they were so deeply depressed. It wasn't going to undo what had happened to them or make all the pain they felt lessen...But for Scott and Jean, it was more than enough in this time conflict.
Most of the afternoon and evening sessions were ending as Jean stood before her mirror brushing her hair. She knew Scott was waiting for her, but she wanted to look presentable even though this was a supposed to be a casual affair. As she continued to mend her hair, she looked at herself in the pale reflection. Many years worth of conflict seemed to show in her eyes as the hollow look on her own face seemed to tell the memory of a million nightmares. Nobody else saw it...Not through the veil of "Miss Perfect" that she had used to cover herself all these years. The longer she put on the act...The more difficult it became to maintain because that truly wasn't who she was. As she became lost in her reflection, she heard a sudden knock on the door.
"Red, you in there?" said a gruff voice.
Jean immediately recognized it as Logan's voice and she tried not to panic. But knowing that this was Logan and not Storm or the Professor, she kept herself from getting too stressed out. Not wanting to shut out the man who had helped raise her, she finally answered.
"Come in..."
As the door opened, she turned and faced him. He was no longer in his uniform, but he did look somewhat concerned.
"You goin' out tonight?" asked the Canadian mutant casually, not bringing up her absence for most part of the day.
"Yes...Just out on a date with Scott," she answered.
Much to her relief, Logan simply nodded, not going any farther or asking too many questions. He had come to trust her after all these years and the same thing went for Scott. While part of him wanted to discuss their shift in behavior over the past month, he knew they weren't ready for that just yet.
"Well...Try to have fun, okay?"
Jean managed to smile back at him, thankful he wasn't bringing up the obvious conflict that was making her and Scott so anxious lately.
"Thank you, Logan."
Even though Wolverine wasn't one to show a whole lot of emotion...He did somewhat return her smile.
"Most of the others are still in the basement changing...But the rest are in the living room waiting for dinner. If ya go around them through the dining room, ya should be able to avoid them."
And with that, he made his leave...Not asking anything about where they had been this afternoon and not even once mentioning the mission. Jean Grey couldn't help but feel grateful towards him after it seemed like everyone else in the mansion wanted to talk to them about it. Even the Professor didn't seem to understand the difficulty. So it was a welcome sight to have Logan understand their feelings somewhat better...And he wasn't even psychic. Not wanting to lose their window, Jean quickly left to meet up with Scott. Apparently, Logan paid him a visit as well and they both made their way out towards the garage through the path that he had given them. Thankfully, nobody stopped to confront them and Scott and Jean were able to make their getaway for a night with each other that they hoped would help them forget about all the terrible conflict...Even if it was only briefly.
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As the sun began to set over the horizon, Scott and Jean pulled in to a small diner that they had eaten at many times before. Much of the trip was marked with silence as the young couple was just glad to get out of the mansion and away from the prying eyes of the rest of the team. While Logan seemed to be the only one who somewhat understood, there was only so much he could do in the end. They knew they would be forced to confront the others and the Professor about the rumors and the mission...But that didn't make it any easier for them.
Soon, they both sat down in a small booth in the moderately crowded diner...Eager to secure one moment of peace without being scrutinized or forced to act perfect. Upon ordering, they both busied themselves with casual conversation which did help distract them from the overall conflicts that had plagued them incessantly.
"I wonder why Logan helped us earlier," asked Scott as they waited for their food. "Normally, I'd expect the standard lecture that Ororo had given us yesterday."
"I don't know...I was just as surprised as you were when he came in my room and didn't ask too many questions," replied Jean who was truly doing her best to relax for the night.
"Yeah, I halfway expected him to tear in to me like he did anybody who wanted to date you," said Scott somewhat jokingly as the overall mood around the couple began to lighten.
"Come on Scott, you're probably the last guy he'd do that to. I mean...He knows you just as well as he knows me. And you should be glad he trusts you."
"It's strange because he always acted like he never trusted anybody," replied Scott with a light laugh.
"Well, I think he has a bigger heart than he likes to show. You know he has to keep up his 'Wolverine' bit around the others."
"Yeah, I know how that feels..."
They continued to talk, avoiding the events of the past month. As hard as these things were to forget, for a brief moment they were pushed off to the side. It was the first time in quite a while they could do something like this and it was a much welcomed feeling. As their conversation continued, their food arrived and they began to eat.
However, their relaxed mood was soon shattered when a rowdy group of boys entered the diner and started heading in their direction. Looking over to see what the commotion was, a new feeling of dread came over them as they identified them as Duncan and his posse.
'Oh no...Not this...Not this,' said Jean in her mind as she shuddered at the thought of being in Duncan's presence again sent chills down her spine.
Scott tried to calm her, but his efforts soon proved useless as Duncan identified them from afar and made his way over towards them. He was still wearing his Bayville jacket even though he was in college now under an athletic scholarship. And he looked as self-centered and cocky as ever.
"Well, well, well; if it isn't the freak couple of Bayville," said Duncan as he walked up to Scott and Jean's booth with a snide grin on his face.
"What do you want Duncan?" said Jean bitterly, not liking how close he was to her at this point.
"What, I can't come in here for a bite to eat?"
"My sentiments exactly Matthews, now either leave us alone or leave," responded Scott as he got up from his seat.
"What's a matter Summers? Something crawl up your ass and die or is Jean still being a prude little bitch?" laughed the blond-haired jock.
Duncan was really pushing it this time around. Scott could take being teased, taunted, and annoyed...But whenever somebody insulted Jean like that, it was something he could not take. He had a powerful urge to rip of his glasses and blow him away like he had done the Friends of Humanity guards that murdered those innocent mutant children and tried to rape Jean. But soon, he was stopped by another voice.
"Don't call me that Duncan!" yelled Jean as she too got up. By now, this conflict had drawn the attention of other nearby customers as they watched the spectacle unfold before them. "I took enough of your bullshit when we were together! I don't need to take any more of it since I dumped your sorry ass!"
"Funny, the way I remembered it...It is me that dumped you," said Duncan confidently despite Jean's rage.
"You...Tried...To...RAPE me!" said Jean in a stern voice.
"No I didn't! You just chickened out because you're too damn prude. And now you're with a loser like Summers because you just don't put out what you advertise..."
"Watch it, asshole!" said Scott as he grabbed Duncan by the shirt collar with rage in his eyes.
"What are you gonna do about it you boy-scout freak? Blow me away? Beat me up? Yeah I'm sure that'll look good for mutants everywhere...And I'm sure that hippie Professor would appreciate that."
Nothing would have pleased Scott more than to blow this idiot away once and for all. Jean too seemed unable to contain her anger as she wanted to let every agonizing emotion she had suppressed out with a vengeance. But through it all...And in plain view of all the other diners that were watching this unfold before them...Scott Summers and Jean Grey forced themselves to lock it all away once again and soon they backed off.
"Yeah, I thought so..." said Duncan with a snide grin.
That just earned him an angry look from Scott as he put down money for the meal and proceeded to leave.
"Come on Jean, let's go...This place is starting to stink."
Jean desperately wanted to unleash her anger upon this boy who had done nothing more except add on to the pain that was her life...But she knew she couldn't...She knew that 'little miss perfect' couldn't do that because of how it would effect others. So she simply followed Scott...Bottling it up all inside her.
As the left, Scott took one last look at Duncan and contemplated hitting him with just one optic blast. After what he had done to Jean, he struggled to hold himself back...But in the end he had to do what any 'Mr. X-man role model' would do...Walk away. As they both got in to Scott's car and sped off as far away from the diner as possible...A heavy silence fell over them as the cool nighttime air blew around them. A sickening feeling developed in the pit of each of their stomachs. The strain of suppressing so much inner pain was beginning to talk its toll on the young couple. Jean tried to hide the tears in her eyes...But couldn't as Duncan's venomous words began to act like poison in her mind. Scott reached over and took her hand in an effort to combat it, but it only tore him up more seeing the look of pain on her face. There were a lot of things that they both wanted to forget. But so far...The fates seemed against them as they were forced to endure more and more pain and having to suppress it with each passing moment as it welled up inside them...
************************************************
For what seemed like an hour, they just drove around Bayville...Never stopping anywhere, not having any destination in mind. It was as if they were trying to drive away from their problems...But they still followed them no matter where they went. Soon, Scott and Jean all but gave up and parked the car on a cliff overlooking Bayville in the distance. Nobody else was around and they finally had a chance to be alone. Many of their dates had ended in secluded places like this...Where they could stop being the upstanding 'perfect' role models and just be themselves for once. And tonight was particularly bad. They had rumors back at the institute, Duncan Matthews back in Bayville, and the lingering pain of the horrible mission that had been haunting them like a nightmare for the last month. It was hard enough dealing with everything before these things had happened...Now, it was uncertain if they could even go on much longer living like this.
Sitting on the hood of Scott's car, both young adults began smoking cigarettes while they reflected on everything that had happened to them within the last month. Ever since the institute started recruiting more students, they had done well hiding the pain of the early years. But learning to live with others had devolved in to putting on an act that only made things worse. Part of this act was due to the wishes of Professor Xavier, but another part of it was them running from bad memories. In the end, it had only made things worse as their mental scars began to fester like never before.
"Some night this has turned out to be," muttered Scott as he took a puff from his cigarette, "I'm sorry it had to be like this Jean."
"It's not your fault Scott...That's just our luck I guess," replied Jean as took a long drag off her cigarette.
"Yeah...But when does it run out?" said Scott as he rubbed the temples of his head, "First it was that damn rumor, then the mission, now this...When does it all stop, Jean? Why does it seem like every fate in the universes is against us?"
Jean could only sigh as those and many other questions surged through her mind. But as she pondered them, she felt no closer to an answer than Scott.
"I wish I knew..." said Jean as she flicked her cigarette in to the air. "God I wish I knew..."
Soon, she felt tears well up in her eyes and a sickening feeling in the pit of her stomach. With nobody around to put an act on for...Bottled up feelings were now unleashed in a wave of sobs. Jean didn't fight these tears...In the end she didn't want to. She just wanted to let it all out. It wasn't long before she collapsed in Scott's arms and just cried her pain out. Seeing the woman he loved cry made Scott lose control of his own emotions. He wanted to make all her pain go away. He wanted to tell her it would be okay...But he soon became too choked up to speak. For so long he was always a man who bottled up everything inside...Trying to make it all go away. But with nobody around to fool...He soon felt tears of his own forming in his eyes. Unable to fight them, he just held Jean close to him while he let them out in wave after wave of painful sobs. The rumor, the hazing from Duncan, and the unspeakable torture he endured under the Friends of Humanity all stung like a thousand knives. And without the others to make their lives more difficult...They could let it all out for the first time in a very long while.
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Scott and Jean stayed at that one secluded spot for several hours. They had no desire to go somewhere else where they would have to act in their old 'perfect' ways. They had no desire to hear the endless snickers and ridicule from the rest of the team and people like Duncan Matthews. So they simply stayed at the cliff for hours, letting all their bottled up emotions go...All the anger, pain, and sadness that they were forced to endure. But after a long while and with the hour of the night getting ever later, they knew they had to return to the institute.
It was past midnight when they reluctantly started heading back. Hopefully, most of the mansion was sound asleep by this hour, or if anything, too tired to hound them any further. They took the long way home, hoping to delay the inevitable. Time soon became a fuzzy haze as they finally arrived back at the darkened institute. From the looks of it, much of the inhabitance was fast asleep in this late hour. But even after the car had stopped and they had parked in the garage, the young couple just lingered for a bit...Reflecting on the turmoil of this night and the last month of their already painful lives.
"I'm sorry that this night didn't turn out like we had hoped Jean," said Scott, finally breaking the silence.
"It doesn't matter..." said Jean as she looked back in to his eyes through the glasses he was always forced to wear, "As long as it was with you..."
Scott swallowed the lump in his throat upon hearing her say that. Her words helped make him feel better like they always had in the past for as long as they had known each other.
"I wish I could do more for you Jean..." said Scott in a voice thick with emotion.
"You don't have to, Scott," said Jean as she moved in closer to him, "You've already done so much...More than I can ever thank you for."
And with that, she captured his lips in a deep kiss. No amount of pain or inner wounds could taint something as pure as this. In the end it made this night worth while even though it was riddled with difficulty.
"I don't want to sleep alone tonight," said Jean as they both stayed in an embrace.
"Then you won't have to."
As they reluctantly parted, they made their way back in to the mansion. There was nobody else around at this hour and the vast halls of the institute were dead silent. The only person who was still awake at this hour was Logan, but he did nothing to impede the young couple much to their thanks. As they made their way up to Scott's room, they took turns changing in to lighter sleeping clothes. And as this dramatic night finally came to a close, they slipped in to the cool bed sheets. It wasn't long before Jean found her way in to Scott's arms and soon, they were both locked in another passionate kiss. This time, the kiss was much deeper than the previous one. Jean's arms were wrapped around Scott's neck as she continued to absorb the warm feeling of being with someone she loved so much. Soon, her hands began to trace gentle patterns along Scott's chest, enjoying the feeling of his firm muscles underneath the shirt he was wearing. Scott too, lost himself in the passion of the moment as he gently traced his hands down the curves of Jean's body. Her legs were now wrapped around his waist as they stayed in the warmth of this one single moment of peace. Their mind link was now a lot more open than usual, warm feelings and thoughts seemed to meld in a sense as the feeling of love and content helped calm their weary nerves.
Part of them wanted to go further...Part of them wanted to make this night complete. But exhaustion, stress, and a slew of bad memories that still couldn't be fully suppressed soon caused them to stop. Hopefully, the time would come soon enough...But for now, Scott Summers and Jean Grey were just trying to get through each day even as it got harder and harder to do. But as they lay there in each other's arms, that feeling of warmth set them at ease...Even if it was only briefly. And as they both started drifting off in to a world of sleep...Scott managed to say a few more words to Jean as he gently stoked the side of her face.
"I love you..." said Scott as he placed one last kiss on her forehead.
"I love you too," said Jean softly.
And with that, they both fell asleep.
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AN: Well, that's it for now. Man, Scott and Jean just can't seem to get a break, can they? But fear not! Another chapter soon awaits them! But from the looks of it, their luck won't get much better. I know this chapter was kind of dark, but it's kind of how the story pans out. I'm sorry if it was a little slow at some points, but I really wanted to go in to the emotional parts for the sake intrigue. Other than that, what do you all think? Do you like it? Please send me your reviews via email or post them on the fanfiction website! I'd love to know what you think and I'm open to all criticism! There's plenty of more Scott/Jean ahead! So I hope you like it and thank you very much for reading!
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