Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > With A Nicht to Love.
Chapter 1: Ryro, ne tombe pas pour lui.
4 reviewsRyan, don't fall for it: Pete, girl and Jac, how can that turn out?
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With a Nicht to love
Ryan Ross
Kitsuney
Panic! At The Disco
Chapter 1: Ryro, ne tombe pas pour lui.
"What do we have to expect today?" I flopped down, turned off my phone, and threw it to the table across the room, missing it of course.
"Petey, and some interview and that's all I know of." Brendon started applying makeup...to see Pete...The things they do...They're so very odd.
"What mag?"
"Not one, it's for a website."
"And what website would that be..."
"Beats me. He didn't say. He just said to be ready."
"So you're putting on the makeup for the interview?"
He slowly turned around and raised his eyebrow. "Yes...This is usually that time when we do makeup...Did you hit your head or something?" he turned then literally hopped back around. "You did it, didn't you?!"
I moved up so I was leaning on the couch's arm. "What?"
"You finally broke up with her."
"Oh...yeah..." I kinda drifted off from that point. I spent literally all night talking to her. From when I was talking to Brend about her when she called til about maybe two hours ago. We talked for like ten hours. I thought I'd die. Then, I finally said it. I told her 'I'm done' and hung up. It wasn't really like we broke up...But that is why my phone is OFF. If she calls, she's not getting a call back. She's just not worth my time. Really. I mean, I let her waste two years. I'm two years older just because of her constant talking. And always about her, at that.
"Ryan, I really hate when you space out. And how can you space out when..."
I glared at Pete, who had kinda suddenly appeared, then looked right past him. I wanted to just slap myself right then. I just got rid of one girl and already I'm fasinated by another. But at least she doesn't look like a whore. She doesn't look like she'll use me to get anywhere. In fact, she's probably already somewhere if she's with..."Pete, hi, nice to see ya. Who's she?"
Pete laughed lightly and tugged her to him. "This is the girl who hates me but is my travel buddy. She's something."
"You hate him?" I had to question. I mean he travels with a girl who hates him? How does that make sense?
"Yes, he's a narcisstic pig."
"You're being too kind, kid."
She made a face and rolled her eyes. "I really don't like you."
"You don't have to."
"You have a name, don't you?" I butted in. I didn't really like the fact that he was kinda there...in the way, sorta speak.
"I'm Jane Doe."
"Really?"
"No," she only slightly smiled and I lit up, I'm sure. "I'm Connor."
"Really?"
"Yes...Have you never met a girl named Connor before?"
I glanced slightly too everyone actually shaking their heads. "Afraid I haven't."
"Well, now you have. Congratulations."
"Am I a winner?"
She smiled and laughed. "I guess...pending, of course."
"Of course." This is where I kinda snapped back into my self. Usually I would not be saying but two words to her. But now...I don't know what the hell happened. I just kinda...Left my body or something.
"Meanwhile, after your interview, Skye is having a VIP party for us. So, I intrust you make sure Con doesn't get lost. She's new to the city." Pete gaved hold of her tighter and kissed her forehead. "You have to come. Now, I'm off. I'm definatley in need of Spence and Jon though. You can talk to them later. We're in town for a week, after all."
"Don't worry, Petey. We'll watch her. Ryan and I are more than trustworthy."
"Trust has nothing to do with it, Bren."
He lowered his eyes at me before unlacing Pete and grabbing onto her. "She'll be fine. Now go and do studio stuff." He did a little drama queen wave to Pete, who just looked at him, shook his head and walked out. "Now, Connor dear, what do you have to ask us? How we got our amazing looks? How we survive with just Ramen for weeks? How much money we use on random shit? What?"
She fakely laughed and privved herself out of his grip. "Actually, I was wondering about...I don't even remember now."
"Oh? Is this," he motioned to himself making her laugh harder, "Just too much?"
"No, hun." She moved past him and I to sit down on the chair. Even though it was made for one person, Brendon tried [of course...{because he is only a flirt whore}] to sit with her, which meant, sitting on her. "Fat ass."
"Actually it's kinda small."
"Actually it doesn't exist but I'm just saying...You weight five hundred pounds."
"Divide by five see how much Ry weights...and add about twentyish for mine."
I glared at him and shook my head. "I'm not a hundred pounds."
"Why are we discussing weight?"
Brendon moved barely up from her. "I don't know. You're the one asking questions."
"Right...well if you can get off of me, I'll start." He pouted, rolled his eyes then finally moved. "Kay so, first-" She stopped as Brendon rang, and rang and rang. Why? Because he didn't remember what pocket it was in. Out of six pockets I don't think it'd be that hard.
He fumbled with it before actually answering. "Yes? Uuuuuummmmmm...Yes, I can. Yes, you owe me. Now? Of course. I'm coming." He got up and walked over to Connor. "I've got to go so you two can do the questions. Petey's in need. He also said to tell you," he turned hastily to me, "not to touch her. Um, kay? I'm leaving. Sorry, Con. Tomorrow, I swear." With that, he left. Finally.
"Did I make that bad of an impression?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean they left. You're the one still here."
I shrugged, hiding a grin. "Maybe I have my reasons."
"Or maybe you're just foolish."
"Maybe."
"How aquinted are you with the area?"
"I know where iHOP is and that's about it..."
She laughed and bit onto her lip. "Well that's always good. You should take me tomorrow morning."
"We have a show around eight if you don't mind getting up around four."
"Why so early?"
"I like walking if I can help it." Momentary silence. Breaking it... "In fact, would you mind walking now? We can keep with the interview."
"Sounds good." She got up and started walking out before I so gracefully grabbed her hand.
"Follow me so we-I don't get dragged into the room with the guys." She nodded and let me lead her out of the building. It was chilly but not extremely chilly. It was just cold enough to be grateful for a hoodie. That's really it. "So, can I ask you questions?"
"But I want to ask some..."
"How about we play 21 questions?"
"Alright, you start."
"How old are you?"
"19, barely. What's your new obession with taxi cab hats and dringy scraves?"
"Dringy? You think they are?"
"Yeah, they only look like they're about to fall apart. Now answer me."
"I don't know...It's just something new. Why is only part of your hair purple?"
"I bleached it and just did it randomly. Why don't you shave anymore?"
"I thought it'd be more mature. Why does it matter?"
She stopped in her tracks and swayed slightly. "I don't know. Should it?"
I turned, smiled, and stared. I'm so hopeless usually around people. And now...I might work for guts. Or at least brownie points. "I do believe it should. Do you think I'm hot or sexy, even?"
She chuckled, pulled her hand over her mouth, and turned pink. "No, I think you're average. Do you think I am?"
The next thing I really wanted to ask is 'Is this all going on your site'. "More so than others. Why am I average?"
"Because you're not my type. I'm not interested in the rockstars. I like normal people, thank you. Is it true that you broke up with Jac?" At that point, hearing just her name, I turned around and started walking to no where. She ran up next to me and pulled her arm into a locking position with mine. "So that's a yes?"
"Yeah," I ever so faintly said. How that news could already be out only hours after it happened, I'll never know. "Are you dating Pete?"
"I already told you, I'm not interested in rockstars. He just keeps me around because he likes the attention."
"I can't say you're wrong."
"What do you mean?"
"He's a media whore, a camera whore, an all around whore. But he got me a job so I'm slightly grateful. The respect level is very...close to zero." We both shut up for a few minutes, crossed a few streets, and still nothing came. I guess that was a conversation breaker. "Why aren't you into rockstars? And what makes you think..." No, don't ask. Be safe. Don't say another word.
"Because I like having privacy. I don't want to have someone who is constantly having little teens trying to get their dirty selves on. Plus, I have this thing about trust. I just don't trust them. And what makes me think you're one, right? Well...You are a camera whore, don't say you aren't. Which reminds me...Take pictures with me."
I lightly let my head up to only see her seriously with her SideKick out, leaning into me. I laughed as she took the picture. She took pictures of us making weird faces, pretending to be scary, and pretending to be innocent. I took my SideKick out as she turned her hand to take another picture. This is when I casually leaned in and kissed her cheek. Not only letting her take the picture, but taking it on mine as well.
She jerked away. "What was that for?"
"What you didn't like it? It's not like it means anything." I stepped back and took a picture of her standing there with one hand on her hips and one holding onto her SideKick, a grin sticthed across her face. "I mean, you already told me..." I stepped back up to her and pulled her hands down. "I am a camera whore."
She shook her head and hit me upside my head with her SideKick. "You suck."
"Just post it. Make the world envy you for what didn't happen."
"I'm going back to the hotel."
"But the party-"
"I hate VIP parties. It's just a time for free booze and for me to get sick to my stomach watching over everyone."
"So, you don't drink..."
"I'm just another kid from a broken home." She extended her arm to me. "I know you're not going."
I nodded. "Kids like us have to stick together, huh?"
"I suppose."
"So, you really hate Pete?"
She chuckled and cracked a grin. "Yes, I do. I don't like people that are so proud of...being gross."
"But you two seriously travel together?"
"Yes, but only because he lets me for free."
I slightly glared. "So you mooch?"
"No, I do not. Pete just won't let me work. Every time I try to get a job, he ruins it."
"Are you going to school?"
"Nope, parents won't pay. You dropped out earlier this year, didn't you?"
"Sadly, I was actually enjoying school for once. It's amazing."
"What is?"
I shook my head and hoped that maybe I'd stop talking aloud sometime. "Nothing."
"Nothing? Well, Mr. Ross, I think that your sucess is amazing. I think you're amazing, not only at guitar but for...your words."
"My words? I'm horrible with them."
"Around me, maybe." She playfully unlaced our arms and walked ahead of me, walking backwards. "Your lyrics are practically to die for."
She caught me. I couldn't beat that. She caught me up. She noticed. I let on. I screwed up. "Thank you, I guess."
"Anytime."
I stalled slightly. I couldn't think of anything to say or do. I felt like I was twelve again, afraid of girls. Hah, when I could have any...I guess that's not even true. She broke my spirit on that one. "Conn, you wanna go get something to eat for going back to the hotel?"
"Why are you the one asking questions? I thought I was gonna do it."
"So...what does that mean? Do you want to get something to eat?"
"I'm acutally kinda tired and I would think you are."
"Why?" Please don't say your Jac's friend. I think I would just literally lay out in the street to get run over. A nice painful death...just like hearing that.
"I heard you were up all night."
"By?" I leaned my head closer to her, hoping maybe somehow that would help me not hear Jac's name.
"Pete because Brendon told him. He said you were hopeless. Can I ask questions now?"
I sunk back into my previous position and kept walking. "Go for it."
"I want to ask something invading, if I may."
"If I can ask you one."
"Deal. Why did you ever date Jacy?"
Invading? No, more like I don't know...Invading and taking over, then trying out genocide... "It just kinda happened."
"If you love her so much, why did you break up with her?"
"Because love isn't real. She used me, I used her. It's that simple."
"And you say you're not a rockstar."
"How did you know we broke up?" Tomorrow the papers will read 'PANIC! GUITARIST COMMITS SUICIDE BECAUSE OF GIRL DETAILS INSIDE.' And sadly, I know it.
"Because she's basically my sister. She called me up this morning crying."
"Whatever." I blew her off, just like that. Huffed and walked away like a baby.
"Ryan, she wasn't trying to use you."
"Oh yeah?" I turned and lowered my eyes. "She just happened to become famous after my sucess? Just a coincidence, right?"
"Fine, don't believe. It's not like I care. I just thought you should know. She's not as bad as you think."
"Connor, I've known her since tenth grade. I know every-"
"I've known since third grade. You don't know anything."
Ryan Ross
Kitsuney
Panic! At The Disco
Chapter 1: Ryro, ne tombe pas pour lui.
"What do we have to expect today?" I flopped down, turned off my phone, and threw it to the table across the room, missing it of course.
"Petey, and some interview and that's all I know of." Brendon started applying makeup...to see Pete...The things they do...They're so very odd.
"What mag?"
"Not one, it's for a website."
"And what website would that be..."
"Beats me. He didn't say. He just said to be ready."
"So you're putting on the makeup for the interview?"
He slowly turned around and raised his eyebrow. "Yes...This is usually that time when we do makeup...Did you hit your head or something?" he turned then literally hopped back around. "You did it, didn't you?!"
I moved up so I was leaning on the couch's arm. "What?"
"You finally broke up with her."
"Oh...yeah..." I kinda drifted off from that point. I spent literally all night talking to her. From when I was talking to Brend about her when she called til about maybe two hours ago. We talked for like ten hours. I thought I'd die. Then, I finally said it. I told her 'I'm done' and hung up. It wasn't really like we broke up...But that is why my phone is OFF. If she calls, she's not getting a call back. She's just not worth my time. Really. I mean, I let her waste two years. I'm two years older just because of her constant talking. And always about her, at that.
"Ryan, I really hate when you space out. And how can you space out when..."
I glared at Pete, who had kinda suddenly appeared, then looked right past him. I wanted to just slap myself right then. I just got rid of one girl and already I'm fasinated by another. But at least she doesn't look like a whore. She doesn't look like she'll use me to get anywhere. In fact, she's probably already somewhere if she's with..."Pete, hi, nice to see ya. Who's she?"
Pete laughed lightly and tugged her to him. "This is the girl who hates me but is my travel buddy. She's something."
"You hate him?" I had to question. I mean he travels with a girl who hates him? How does that make sense?
"Yes, he's a narcisstic pig."
"You're being too kind, kid."
She made a face and rolled her eyes. "I really don't like you."
"You don't have to."
"You have a name, don't you?" I butted in. I didn't really like the fact that he was kinda there...in the way, sorta speak.
"I'm Jane Doe."
"Really?"
"No," she only slightly smiled and I lit up, I'm sure. "I'm Connor."
"Really?"
"Yes...Have you never met a girl named Connor before?"
I glanced slightly too everyone actually shaking their heads. "Afraid I haven't."
"Well, now you have. Congratulations."
"Am I a winner?"
She smiled and laughed. "I guess...pending, of course."
"Of course." This is where I kinda snapped back into my self. Usually I would not be saying but two words to her. But now...I don't know what the hell happened. I just kinda...Left my body or something.
"Meanwhile, after your interview, Skye is having a VIP party for us. So, I intrust you make sure Con doesn't get lost. She's new to the city." Pete gaved hold of her tighter and kissed her forehead. "You have to come. Now, I'm off. I'm definatley in need of Spence and Jon though. You can talk to them later. We're in town for a week, after all."
"Don't worry, Petey. We'll watch her. Ryan and I are more than trustworthy."
"Trust has nothing to do with it, Bren."
He lowered his eyes at me before unlacing Pete and grabbing onto her. "She'll be fine. Now go and do studio stuff." He did a little drama queen wave to Pete, who just looked at him, shook his head and walked out. "Now, Connor dear, what do you have to ask us? How we got our amazing looks? How we survive with just Ramen for weeks? How much money we use on random shit? What?"
She fakely laughed and privved herself out of his grip. "Actually, I was wondering about...I don't even remember now."
"Oh? Is this," he motioned to himself making her laugh harder, "Just too much?"
"No, hun." She moved past him and I to sit down on the chair. Even though it was made for one person, Brendon tried [of course...{because he is only a flirt whore}] to sit with her, which meant, sitting on her. "Fat ass."
"Actually it's kinda small."
"Actually it doesn't exist but I'm just saying...You weight five hundred pounds."
"Divide by five see how much Ry weights...and add about twentyish for mine."
I glared at him and shook my head. "I'm not a hundred pounds."
"Why are we discussing weight?"
Brendon moved barely up from her. "I don't know. You're the one asking questions."
"Right...well if you can get off of me, I'll start." He pouted, rolled his eyes then finally moved. "Kay so, first-" She stopped as Brendon rang, and rang and rang. Why? Because he didn't remember what pocket it was in. Out of six pockets I don't think it'd be that hard.
He fumbled with it before actually answering. "Yes? Uuuuuummmmmm...Yes, I can. Yes, you owe me. Now? Of course. I'm coming." He got up and walked over to Connor. "I've got to go so you two can do the questions. Petey's in need. He also said to tell you," he turned hastily to me, "not to touch her. Um, kay? I'm leaving. Sorry, Con. Tomorrow, I swear." With that, he left. Finally.
"Did I make that bad of an impression?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean they left. You're the one still here."
I shrugged, hiding a grin. "Maybe I have my reasons."
"Or maybe you're just foolish."
"Maybe."
"How aquinted are you with the area?"
"I know where iHOP is and that's about it..."
She laughed and bit onto her lip. "Well that's always good. You should take me tomorrow morning."
"We have a show around eight if you don't mind getting up around four."
"Why so early?"
"I like walking if I can help it." Momentary silence. Breaking it... "In fact, would you mind walking now? We can keep with the interview."
"Sounds good." She got up and started walking out before I so gracefully grabbed her hand.
"Follow me so we-I don't get dragged into the room with the guys." She nodded and let me lead her out of the building. It was chilly but not extremely chilly. It was just cold enough to be grateful for a hoodie. That's really it. "So, can I ask you questions?"
"But I want to ask some..."
"How about we play 21 questions?"
"Alright, you start."
"How old are you?"
"19, barely. What's your new obession with taxi cab hats and dringy scraves?"
"Dringy? You think they are?"
"Yeah, they only look like they're about to fall apart. Now answer me."
"I don't know...It's just something new. Why is only part of your hair purple?"
"I bleached it and just did it randomly. Why don't you shave anymore?"
"I thought it'd be more mature. Why does it matter?"
She stopped in her tracks and swayed slightly. "I don't know. Should it?"
I turned, smiled, and stared. I'm so hopeless usually around people. And now...I might work for guts. Or at least brownie points. "I do believe it should. Do you think I'm hot or sexy, even?"
She chuckled, pulled her hand over her mouth, and turned pink. "No, I think you're average. Do you think I am?"
The next thing I really wanted to ask is 'Is this all going on your site'. "More so than others. Why am I average?"
"Because you're not my type. I'm not interested in the rockstars. I like normal people, thank you. Is it true that you broke up with Jac?" At that point, hearing just her name, I turned around and started walking to no where. She ran up next to me and pulled her arm into a locking position with mine. "So that's a yes?"
"Yeah," I ever so faintly said. How that news could already be out only hours after it happened, I'll never know. "Are you dating Pete?"
"I already told you, I'm not interested in rockstars. He just keeps me around because he likes the attention."
"I can't say you're wrong."
"What do you mean?"
"He's a media whore, a camera whore, an all around whore. But he got me a job so I'm slightly grateful. The respect level is very...close to zero." We both shut up for a few minutes, crossed a few streets, and still nothing came. I guess that was a conversation breaker. "Why aren't you into rockstars? And what makes you think..." No, don't ask. Be safe. Don't say another word.
"Because I like having privacy. I don't want to have someone who is constantly having little teens trying to get their dirty selves on. Plus, I have this thing about trust. I just don't trust them. And what makes me think you're one, right? Well...You are a camera whore, don't say you aren't. Which reminds me...Take pictures with me."
I lightly let my head up to only see her seriously with her SideKick out, leaning into me. I laughed as she took the picture. She took pictures of us making weird faces, pretending to be scary, and pretending to be innocent. I took my SideKick out as she turned her hand to take another picture. This is when I casually leaned in and kissed her cheek. Not only letting her take the picture, but taking it on mine as well.
She jerked away. "What was that for?"
"What you didn't like it? It's not like it means anything." I stepped back and took a picture of her standing there with one hand on her hips and one holding onto her SideKick, a grin sticthed across her face. "I mean, you already told me..." I stepped back up to her and pulled her hands down. "I am a camera whore."
She shook her head and hit me upside my head with her SideKick. "You suck."
"Just post it. Make the world envy you for what didn't happen."
"I'm going back to the hotel."
"But the party-"
"I hate VIP parties. It's just a time for free booze and for me to get sick to my stomach watching over everyone."
"So, you don't drink..."
"I'm just another kid from a broken home." She extended her arm to me. "I know you're not going."
I nodded. "Kids like us have to stick together, huh?"
"I suppose."
"So, you really hate Pete?"
She chuckled and cracked a grin. "Yes, I do. I don't like people that are so proud of...being gross."
"But you two seriously travel together?"
"Yes, but only because he lets me for free."
I slightly glared. "So you mooch?"
"No, I do not. Pete just won't let me work. Every time I try to get a job, he ruins it."
"Are you going to school?"
"Nope, parents won't pay. You dropped out earlier this year, didn't you?"
"Sadly, I was actually enjoying school for once. It's amazing."
"What is?"
I shook my head and hoped that maybe I'd stop talking aloud sometime. "Nothing."
"Nothing? Well, Mr. Ross, I think that your sucess is amazing. I think you're amazing, not only at guitar but for...your words."
"My words? I'm horrible with them."
"Around me, maybe." She playfully unlaced our arms and walked ahead of me, walking backwards. "Your lyrics are practically to die for."
She caught me. I couldn't beat that. She caught me up. She noticed. I let on. I screwed up. "Thank you, I guess."
"Anytime."
I stalled slightly. I couldn't think of anything to say or do. I felt like I was twelve again, afraid of girls. Hah, when I could have any...I guess that's not even true. She broke my spirit on that one. "Conn, you wanna go get something to eat for going back to the hotel?"
"Why are you the one asking questions? I thought I was gonna do it."
"So...what does that mean? Do you want to get something to eat?"
"I'm acutally kinda tired and I would think you are."
"Why?" Please don't say your Jac's friend. I think I would just literally lay out in the street to get run over. A nice painful death...just like hearing that.
"I heard you were up all night."
"By?" I leaned my head closer to her, hoping maybe somehow that would help me not hear Jac's name.
"Pete because Brendon told him. He said you were hopeless. Can I ask questions now?"
I sunk back into my previous position and kept walking. "Go for it."
"I want to ask something invading, if I may."
"If I can ask you one."
"Deal. Why did you ever date Jacy?"
Invading? No, more like I don't know...Invading and taking over, then trying out genocide... "It just kinda happened."
"If you love her so much, why did you break up with her?"
"Because love isn't real. She used me, I used her. It's that simple."
"And you say you're not a rockstar."
"How did you know we broke up?" Tomorrow the papers will read 'PANIC! GUITARIST COMMITS SUICIDE BECAUSE OF GIRL DETAILS INSIDE.' And sadly, I know it.
"Because she's basically my sister. She called me up this morning crying."
"Whatever." I blew her off, just like that. Huffed and walked away like a baby.
"Ryan, she wasn't trying to use you."
"Oh yeah?" I turned and lowered my eyes. "She just happened to become famous after my sucess? Just a coincidence, right?"
"Fine, don't believe. It's not like I care. I just thought you should know. She's not as bad as you think."
"Connor, I've known her since tenth grade. I know every-"
"I've known since third grade. You don't know anything."
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