FicWad

[[LONG CHAPTER]]
I'm far too good to all of you
actually more like the other way around
comments were great again
keep it up!











Pat and me climbed into his little red 89' ford pickup and began driving down the streets of Chicago. I looked over at him, his trucker hat sitting contently on the top of his head as his eyes looked forward, concentrating on the road. He took his eyes off the road for a moment and glanced over at me.

"What are you looking at?" he smiled.

"I'm lookin' at you, got a problem with that, Stump?" I smiled. Patrick replied, also with a smile and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in close to him on the long bench seat. "So where are we going?"

"Well, me and the band signed up for the gig later. It's for cancer or some cause like that. I was thinking that you could come along and watch; maybe catch up a little after we're done. It'll be fun."

My heart immediately dropped as soon as he said the word 'band'. "Uhh...Pat. When you say band.... you mean Peter ass-hole Wentz, don't you?"

"Courtney Ellen Brown", Patrick said. I knew that this was going to be some long, big brother type of lecture; it always was when he used my full name. "Try and think logically here. There isn't going to be many times where you'll get to see all of us without Pete being there. I mean, he's part of the band, not to mention my best friend." I mouthed the words as he said them, it being totally obvious and all. "You seriously have to cut this guy some slack. He hurt you and I totally get it. I'm not saying that what he did to you was right or anything. But you're going to have to forgive him and put things behind you sooner or later."

I rolled my eyes as I slumped down into my seat. "Easier said then done, Patty-Cakes", I smiled as I looked up at him. "Pete didn't just hurt me.... He was the only fucking person that I trusted. And you know what he did? He abused it." I took a pause as Patrick pulled into the back parking lot of the Venue. "I can't trust anyone now."

"No one, huh?" Patrick said as he drove around back and parked up against the back wall, next to Andy and Joes car. "What about your dear old Patty-Cakes? Does he get no trust?"

I smiled as I leaned into his arm, "Fine, make that one person I can trust", I sat up and kissed him on his cheek, soon after nestling my head up on his shoulder. "You're the only guy in my life Pat. No one else."

"Ah so switching over to females are we? That's hot", He smiled jokingly as he nudged me on the shoulder. "Maybe you and your future chickie-friend can get busy somewhere near me...?" He giggled giddily.

"Oh...you'd better believe it!" I smiled tauntingly. "In fact maybe we'll have to include you in some of our little fun", I watched Patrick's expression change to somewhat aroused, as if imagining the whole sequence in his head. "Only when it happens of course."

He shook himself out of his little Patty-Cakes/Lesbian fantasy and looked over at me, "...Yes.... uhhh...but of course." He unbuckled his seat belt and wrapped his arm around my back. "So what do you say? Ready to see Andy and Joe?"

My eyes immediately brightened as I herd their names, "ohmygod yes!" I squealed happily as I quickly undid my seat belt and opened the door, jumping out and making my way towards the back entrance. I looked back, just as I reached the door and saw Patrick still getting out of the car. I opened the door and ran inside, down the hallway, still looking behind me for Patrick, when I suddenly collided with someone.

As our bodies hit, I felt warm liquid run all over me, burning my skin. I refrained from screaming, as I smelt the distinctive smell of coffee. "Fucking watch where the hell you're going!" an angry Pete screamed. He didn't even both looking up at me, just rushing down to his precious Hemmingway to wipe the coffee from his coat. "This dog you just spilled on could get you....!" He bit his lip immediately as he looked up at my face.

I looked down at my shirt, now covered in coffee, the StarBucks cup still in my hand from when thrown on me during the collision. My face must have been turning a bazillion different shades of red out of a mixture of embarrassment and anger. "Who cares about your fucking dog!" I screamed as I threw the cup at his chest. He caught it without problem, but just throwing something at him made me feel a little better. "Look at my clothes!"

Pete quickly bent down and picked up the napkins that had fallen out from his hands. Approaching my slowly as I stayed preoccupied with my stained garment, he pressed the napkin to my shirt began to wipe the coffee off. I slapped his hand away as I neared my chest. "Get the hell away from me!" I snapped as I tore the napkins from his hands.

Suddenly, Patrick ran through the doors with a smile on his face. "Okay, Court, you beat me...." He immediately silenced himself, as well as changing his expression to something more appropriate, as he noticed me, Pete, the dog, and the coffee that was spilt all throughout the hallway. "Uhh....", he quickly walked up to me and grabbed some of the stray napkins that were scattered around the floor, "Let me help you."

I exhailed loudly into a groan as I looked over at Pete, who was hurrying to get the coffee out of Hemmingway's coat. I rolled my eyes, just as he looked up at me. "What the fuck is your problem?" Pete said arrogantly as he stood up, completely forgetting about his dog. "It's not like I'm trying to make your life hell or anything. I mean, look over at Hem." He glanced over at the dog sitting by his foot. "You think I would intentionally get him covered in coffee?"

Patrick began speaking cautiously, "You guys...maybe we should just...."

"Yeah, well what the hell am I supposed to think!" I spat back, just as loud and harshly as him. "It seems that whenever you want, you just pop back into my life like it's nothing, acting like a jack ass the entire time might I add." I took a pause as I looked over at Patrick, whose face looked mortified. "Did you ever take a second to think that maybe I had no interest in associating with you.... ever?"

"I had no idea that you were still even around!" Pete screamed as his dog whimpered from the floor, covering his eyes with his paws. "I thought that you would have gotten out of this shit town a long time ago and move on. I thought that you would have gone out and gotten what you wanted, made something out of yourself!" he took a pause as he leaned himself up against the wall of the narrow hallway. "I thought you would have left and done what you were meant to do."

"Well you can't always go by your assumptions, can you?" I stormed past Pete and Patrick angrily, making my way down the hallway until I reached the now empty dressing room.

__________

I sat there furiously for about a half hour, while I listened to the band practice distantly. I sat down on the couch with a notebook and pen, writing down everything I was feeling. That's what I did, that's how I dealt. I was pissed beyond anything that I could explain. I just wanted to go out there and punch that fucker right in his too-gorgeous-for-such-an-ass-hole face, maybe break it and screw it up. Then we could see how many little fan-girls, not to mention fan-boys loved him.

As I scribbled down on the back of the seventh page, I heard the band suddenly stop playing. That meant only one thing; that they would be coming in here shortly. I quickly set the notebook down and sprinted into the bathroom, locking the door behind me; that was my only option. It didn't matter how long it had been since I'd seen Andy or Joe, what mattered was that Pete would be with them. I could always call them to catch up, but just sitting in the room with him was like sitting through hell.

I pressed my ear to the door as I heard all the boys file in. I herd Andy's medium toned voice that always made me smile. He began speaking about his whole PETA thing and trying to explain to Patrick why not to eat meat. And I could already hear Joe cracking his dumb jokes and reciting the lame ass pick up lines that he and I used to joke about. I missed those boys so much.

But a few minutes later, the room grew silent as I herd the door close. Cautiously waiting three minutes or so, I opened the door slowly, seeing no one in the room, and walked out. I turned the corner leading to the couch where I sat, and was angered to see a certain ass hole sitting there, reading my notebook non the less.

I walked up towards him with heavy footsteps, crossing my arms snobbishly as I stood before him. "What the hell are you doing with my notebook?" I questioned angrily. It seemed as though he paid no attention to my presents while I spoke. I leaned down and snatched it from his hands as I cocked an eyebrow, urging him for a reply.

"That's what I was talking about when I said you should have gone away from here and done what you were meant to do. You're writing, you're lyrics; they're amazing." He said in awe. "The way you capture the moment with the metaphors and descriptions is breathtaking."

"Don't even try and fucking try and impress me with your false compliments", I said as I closed the notebook and gripped it tightly within my hands. "I know my writing's no good, and I don't fucking care. You don't have the right to read my personal property."

"I have the right to read it when it's sitting, opened on the table," he cocked his eyebrow like a jackass, as if testing me. God I have no idea what I actually saw in him.

"Well.... what would you know about writing anyways", I said as I walked over to my bag and put my notebook inside of it. "You're just a.... a sellout. All the hair and clothes are a part of the image you portray. That 'oh look at me, I'm a little emo boy' thing that drives all the pre-teens wild."

He burrowed his eyebrows together, as if thinking of a come back. I crossed my arms and tapped my foot against the hardwood floor. "Do you have fun making fun of what I am?" he asked harshly. I walked over and sat down in the chair furthest away from him. "You have no idea what I mean to some of these kids. What my lyrics mean to them. By calling me a sellout you're also mocking all the kids who look up to me."

I rolled my eyes, "Fucking save the speech for the tabloids", I said as I slumped down into my seat. "I'm not dumb like they are. I've seen the real you. You aren't the caring type; you never have been. All you care about is the money and the fame." I took a pause, studying his facial expression. "All you care about is being a somebody."

"Can you blame me, Court?" he said. "After growing up in Willmet, seeing what the average life was like, you think I was just going to give into it without throwing a good fight?" he took a pause as he exhaled loudly. " I had dreams, and I did everything I could to reach them; to get where I am today.... What I don't get is why you haven't."

"What makes you think that you really know me? How do you know I dream of making it big? For all you know, I could dream of growing up and owning a little diner down on 22nd, or being a stay at home...."

"You really think I've forgotten that much about you, Court?" Pete interrupted. "Every single fucking word that came out of your mouth just now is bull shit and you know it!"

"No!" I screamed, tears beginning to fill my eyes. I took a pause as I brought my hand up to my face and wiped them away. "You're right, I did have dreams. Four fucking days after you left me I got a letter in the mail saying that I got accepted to NYU with a full writing scholarship! My dreams were in the making!" I began to cry as I felt the light touch of the makeup seeping down my face. "But I could go in the fall...I couldn't go because I..." I suddenly bit my lip, stopping me from opening up to him anymore. My tears were like an opened wound to him.

"Because why?" Pete asked softly. This time he actually seemed somewhat understanding and caring. I was very much aware that this was probably just another act he had up his sleeve, but it was all too convincing. Nevertheless I kept my teeth biting hard into the wet pinkness of my mouth, forbidding me from speaking. "Court..."

"Because I was fucking pregnant.... with you're baby..."










aha
how's that for action pact, huh, huh?
I'd better get tons of comments AND rates for this one
If I don't....wooo, watch out!
Oh but if you do I'll love you forever!



approximently 2 weeks until Infinity On High is relased to the public
WOOOOOOOOO
oh and just in case you were wondering; i do have a song on my profile that hasnt been released to the public yet
just one of my many tricks i keep up my sleeve =]