FicWad

I sank further and further into depression. The knowledge that I had failed to keep my promise was just too much to handle. Everyone I knew, absolutely everyone, was starting to give up on me. I remember that conversation all too clearly...
~~
"I don't know how much more of this I can take, Mike," said Bob. "I just hate seeing him like this."
"And you think I don't?" Mikey shot back. "He's my brother. I feel like I'm right there with him." From the other side of the wall, I almost began to cry. I hated hearing him sound like this.
"We all hate to see someone we care about in pain. That's what life is all about, isn't it?" said Frank, lighting up a cigarette. I often missed hearing the subtle click of the lighter and seeing the pale yellow flame, but I wasn't ready to die. Not just yet.
"No, it's not," countered Ray. "You're starting to get just as bad as he is."
"So what? Maybe he's right. There's no point in fighting any of this."
"Guys, stop it," said Mikey in an effort to keep the peace. "We can't give up on him now. We just can't." I heard footsteps approaching, and rolled over like I was asleep. I was lucky Frank couldn't see my face, or he probably would have dropped the cigarette and lit us all on fire. I was in so much pain when I heard Mikey say those words. I couldn't believe they had even considered giving up on me. Maybe my life just wasn't important enough.
"I'm sorry," Frank said to Mikey as he shut the door and let darkness creep back over me. "I'm not going to give up on Gerard. Not now, not ever."
I could easily picture Mikey's face when he heard that. He must have smiled, but inside, in his very soul, he was hurt.
~~
Now life devalues day by day
As friends and neighbors turn away
And there's a change that, even with regret, cannot be undone...