Categories > Cartoons > X-Men: Evolution > The Little Mermaid: Evolution
Chapter 6. Sorry this took so long, holidays take a lot of work. To make up for it, I made this chapter extra long.
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Scott wheels in AnonGirl88, who has been confined to a straight-jacket and one of those wheel things used to haul around boxes and crazy people.
"Hey, let me out of this thing!" she yells, struggling as much as possible. "The sugar and caffeine are completley out of my system, so you can let me go!"
"Just say your lines." Scott says, depositing her in front of the camera.
"Fine. Hello, welcome to the sixth chapter of The Little Mermaid: Evolution. I am your director, AnonGirl88, and I hope you enjoy todays scene." she says in monotone before glaring at Scott. "If I ever make a Shrek parody, I'm making you Lord Farquad." she scowls.
"Nice try, but I'm not falling for it." he replies while wheeling her back off the set.
"And you wonder why nobody likes you." AnonGirl88 snaps.
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Hank is sitting in his throne, twirling the flower Jean gave him earlier.
"Oh, who could the lucky merman be?" he laughs to himself. Remy sneaks in and hides in the doorway. Hank notices and quickly hides the flower. "Oh, er, come in, Sebastion."
Remy swallows a huge lump in his throat and gives himself a little pep talk.
"Okay, no matter what happens, Remy's got to remain calm." he mutters before calmly walking up to the throne. "Yes?" he squeaks.
"Oh yeah, real smooth, Cajun!" Lance yells.
Remy glares at him then clears his throat.
"Yes, yo' Majesty?" he says calmly.
"Sebastion, I'm concerned about Ariel. Have you noticed anything peculiar?" Hank asks.
"Hmm, peculiar?" Remy parrots.
"You know, swimming around day dreaming, singing to herself? You hadn't noticed?" Hank says suspiciously.
"Oh, well, I, er, uh." Remy stutters.
"Sebastion." Hank motions to Remy to come closer, so Remy swims up to the arm of the throne. "I know you've been keeping something from me."
"Keeping something?" Remy repeats, getting very nervous.
"About Ariel." Hank prods.
"Ariel?" Remy gulps, starting to sweat.
"Is there an echo in here or what?" Pyro yells from backstage, also in a straight jacket like AnonGirl88.
"Is there an echo in here or what?"
"Oops, sorry!" Forge says. He adjusts the sound.
"In love, hmm?" Hanks prods with both voice and trident.
"Send in the stunt double!" AnonGirl88 yells from backstage. Todd walks in.
"Whoa, why does Remy need a stunt double?" Remy asks.
"Because when we did this scene in rehearsals, you couldn't even pretend to have a panic attack, remember?" AnonGirl88 says. "Where as Toad is the worlds best panicking person."
"Hey thanks!" Toad says, preening a little.
"That's just a nice way of calling you a coward." Pietro says.
"Quiet you, or I'll duck tape you to the ceiling and use you for a speed bag." AnonGirl88 says. Pietro yelps and runs off.
Todd and Remy switch places, and Todd immeadiatly starts to hyperventilate and soon looses it.
"I tried to stop her Sire! She wouldn't listen! I told her to stay away from humans! They are bad! They are trouble!" sobs Toad.
"Humans? WHAT ABOUT HUMANS?!" Hank bellows.
"Humans?" Toad laughs nervously. "Who said anything about humans?" he laughs nervously. Hank grabs him and the scene changes to Sam swimming in front of Jean.
"Flounder, why can't you just tell me where we're going?" she asks. They swim into her secret grotto.
"You'll see, it's a surprise!" Sam says. There in the middle of the room is the tacky statue of Scott. Jean gasps when she sees it and immeadiatley swims over to it.
"Oh my gosh!" she hugs Sam. "Flounder you're the best! It looks just like him! It even has his sunglasses!" she giggles and starts to flirt and hang on the statue. "Why Eric, run away with you? This is all so, so sudden!"
"Oh sure, Jean flirts with a cheap statue of Scott, nobody says a word. I name my lighter and suddenly I'm psychotic." AnonGirl88 pouts.
"Anon, you not only named your lighter, you claimed that it asked you to marry it." Lance says.
"Hey! You leave Julius out of this! And I made no such claim. I said that Pyro asked me to marry him" AnonGirl88 snaps.
"Which I did not!" Pyro responds.
"Excuse me, but would it be too much trouble to get on with this parody before the day is over?" Hank asks.
"Huh, oh yeah, get on with it already." AnonGirl88 says dismissivly. "Now somebody GET ME OUT OF THIS THING!!"
"I second that!" Pyro adds.
Jean spins around and sees a very angry looking Hank standing at the doorway.
"Daddy!" she exclaims.
"I consider myself a reasonable merman." he says coolly. "I set certain rules, and I expect those rules to be obeyed!"
"But Daddy-" Jean starts but then Hank cuts her off.
"Is it true that you rescued a human from drowning?"
"Daddy I had to."
"Contact with the human world is forbidden! Ariel, you know this!"
"He would have died!"
"One less human to worry about." Suddenly the Acolytes and Brotherhood start cheering.
"Quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 yells.
"You don't even know him!" Jean says angrilly.
"Know him? I don't have to know him, they're all the same! Spineless harpooning fish-eating vermin! Incapable of any real feeling." Hank says. The Acolytes and Brotherhood cheer even louder.
"I said quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 screams.
"Daddy I love him!" Jean yells. She looks shocked at her own words, but not as shocked as Hank.
"No. Have you lost your senses completley? He's a human, you're a mermaid!" Hank exclaims
"I don't care." Jean says stubbornly.
"So help me, Ariel, I am going to get through to you!" Hank yells, powering up his trident, "And if this is what it takes, so be it!" And he immeadiatly starts blowing everything up.
"Yeah!! Burn, baby, burn!!" Pyro yells.
"Whoo-hoo!" AnonGirl88 hoots.
"Get those two out of here." Scott says. As the two psychotics are wheeled away, Hank continues to blow stuff up while Jean tries in vain to stop him. Hank finally aims at the statue, and KABOOM!!!! It's blown to pieces. Jean swims to her rock and starts crying. Hank swims away sadly, while Remy and Sam swim over to her.
"Ariel, Remy-" Remy begins, but Jean cuts him off.
"Just go away."
Remy looks hurt, but he and Sam do as she says. As soon as they're gone, Lance and Pietro the eels show themselves and begin to casually swim around above Jean.
"Poor child." Lance remarks.
"Poor sweet child." Pietro adds.
"She has a very serious problem."
"If only there was something we could do."
"But there is something."
"Who, who are you?" Jean sniffs.
"Don't be scared." Pietro says soothingly.
"We represent someone who can help you." Lance tells her as he and Pietro swim around her head and through her hair.
"Someone who can make all your dreams come true."
"Just imagine." They both say. "You and your prince, together, forever."
"I don't understand." Jean says.
"Ursula has great power." Pietro hisses.
"The sea witch?" Jean asks. "Why that, I couldn't possibly, no! Get out of here, leave me alone!" With that said, she buries her head in her arms again.
"Suit yourself." Lance says.
"It was only a suggestion." Pietro adds airlly.
As he and Lance swim to the doorway, he uses his tail to flick the broken face of the statue in Jeans direction. She glances up and looks at it. She picks it up, then calls out.
"Wait!"
"Yes?" Pietro and Lance turn around. Meanwhile, outside the entrance, Sam and Remy are sitting around feeling sad about what happend to Jean.
"Poor Ariel." Sam sniffs.
"Remy didn't mean to tell, it was an accident." Remy defends. A shadow passes over their heads. They look up and see Jean swimming away with Lance and Pietro. Remy quickly swims up.
"Ariel, where are you going?" He gets up in her face. "Ariel, what are you doing with dis riff-raff?"
"Who are you calling riff-raff, crab boy?!" Lance snaps.
"Just get on with it, Alvers!" Scott groans.
"Make me, Summers!" Lance yells.
"Scott, we've got a problem." Jamie says.
"Not now, Jamie." Scott says.
"But the director and co-director are gone!" the twelve year old says.
"WHAT! When did this happen?!" Scott yells.
"About five minutes ago, these three girls came by and got them out of their straight jackets and took off in a brown mini van."
"Oh no, by any chance was one of them eighteen with brown hair and brown eyes wearing a red t-shirt, blue jeans, a Giants baseball cap, and a watch that looks just like Kurt's image inducer?"
"Uh-huh."
"And was one of them sixteen with dirty blonde hair and grey eyes wearing a grey sweater and faded blue jeans?"
"Yup."
"And just out of curiousity, was the last one also sixteen but with really short black hair, amber eyes, and wearing a faded black tank top and ripped black jeans, with barbed wire tattoos just above her elbows?"
"How'd you know that?" Jamie asks. Scott smacks his head.
"Great, AnonGirl88's insane OC's have rescued her and Pyro. Who knows what those maniacs are planning?"
"Oh I know that, I over heard them say that they're going to hunt down Mr. Logan." Jamie responds. Scott sighs.
"Well that's a relief. At least we won't have to worry about them burning the set down again."
"Does that mean we can get back to the parody now?" Pietro yells.
"Yeah, yeah, get on with it!"
"I'm going to go see Ursula." Jean says before swimming off with the eels. Remy gasps and swims after her.
"Ariel, no! No, she's a demon!" Remy exclaims.
"Why don't you tell my father, you're good at that." Jean snaps. Remy looks defeated for a moment, then he waves his claw at Sam.
"Come on." he says. He and Sam follow the three conspirators through a bunch of dark and scary stuff. When they get to a coral reef that resembles a gigantic dinosaur, Jean hesitates.
"This way!" Lance and Pietro hiss. Jean then follows them in. As they swim past the sickly garden of sea weed like things, some of them start grabbing at Jean. She manages to struggle loose and swims well out of reach, then Agatha's voice floats through the water.
"Come in, come in my child. We mustn't lurk in doorways." Agatha comes out of her hiding spot, hands on her hips. "It's rude. One might question your upbringing." she chuckles and swims over to her sea shell vanity and begins putting mousse in her hair. "Now, you're here because you have a thing for a human, this prince fellow? Not that I blame you, he is quite a 'catch', isn't he?"
Agatha laughs at her own joke while Jean carefully swims closer. Agatha graps a small sea shell and squeezes it, revealing that it's lipstick.
"Well, angel fish. The solution to your problem is simple." she puckers her lips after applying the lipstick. "The only way to get what you want is to become a human yourself."
"Can you do that?" Jean asks. Agatha smiles evilly to herself then turns around to face Jean, a kind smile replacing the secret evil one.
"My dear, sweet child, that's what I do! It's what I live for, to help unfortunate merfolk, like yourself! Poor souls, with no one else to turn to."
'I admit that in the past I've been a nasty,
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch.
But you'll find that nowadays,
I've mended all my ways,
Repented, seen the light and made the switch.
True, yes!
And I fortunatley know a little magic.
It's a talent that I always have possessed.
And dear lateley, please don't laugh,
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed.
(Pathetic.)
Poor unfortunate souls,
In pain! In need!
In her cauldron, a non-skinny mermaid and a twig-thin merman appear, looking very sad.
This one longing to be thinner, that one wants to get the girl,
And I help them! Yes I do.
Agatha uses her magic and gives the mermaid a super-models upper body and gives the merman a bodybuilders upper body. The two then embrace happily.
Now it's happened once or twice,
Someone couldn't pay the price,
And I'm afraid I had to rake them across the coals.
She opens her hand to the two, but they shrug and hold out their arms, indicating they can't pay her. She uses her magic to turn them into the creepy little sea weed things.
Yes I've had the odd complaint,
But on the whole I've been a saint!
To those poor, unfortuanate souls!
"Now, here's the deal. I will make you a potion that will turn you into a human for three days." Agatha says, leading Jean over to her cauldron. "You got that? Three days. Now listen, this is important." She makes the cauldron show pictures to emphasise the situation. "Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to make dear old princey fall in love with you. That is, he's got to kiss you. Not just any kiss, the kiss of true love. If he does kiss you before the third day, you'll remain human permnanentley. But if he doesn't, you'll turn back into a mermaid and, you'll belong to me." she hisses the last three words dangerously.
"Non, Ariel!" Remy yells. Lance and Pietro quickly grab him and Sam and wrap around their mouths, muffling any more protests.
"Have we got a deal?" Agatha asks.
"If I become human, I'll never see my father or sisters again." Jean says sadly.
"That's right. But, you'll have your man." Agatha says. "Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?" she chuckles.
"It's a shame some of us didn't have a choice in doing this parody." Jason mutters off stage.
"Be quiet, Mastermind!" Scott yells.
"Oh, and there is one more little thing." Agatha adds, ignoring the interruption. "We haven't discussed the method of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know."
"But I don't have any-" Jean begins, but Agatha puts a tentacle over her lips, effectivley shutting her up.
"I'm not asking much. Just a token, really, a trifle! You'll never even miss it." Agatha says. "What I want is, your voice."
"My voice?" Jean asks, her hand at her throat.
"You've got it sweet cheeks, no more talking, singing, zip!" Agatha says.
"But without my voice, how can I-" Jean starts, but Agatha interrupts her.
"You'll have your looks! You're pretty face! And don't underestimate the importance of body language, ha!
'The men up there don't like a lot of blabber!
They think a girl who gossips is a bore!
Yes on land it's much preffered
For ladies not to say a word,
And after all dear what is idle chatter for?
Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation.
True gentlemen avoid it when they can.
But they dout and swoon and swan
On a lady who's withdrawn!
It's she who holds her tongue who gets her man!
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul!
Go ahead, make your choice!
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day,
It won't cost much, just your voice!
Agatha begins to throw a bunch of stuff into her cauldron as she sings, creating a lot of smoke and bubbles.
You poor unfortunate soul!
It's sad, but true!
She stands right behind Jean and forces a pen and scroll into her hand.
If you want to cross the bridge my sweet
You have got to pay the toll.
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll!
Out of Jeans ear shot, she quietly adds to Lance and Pietro:
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys!
The boss is on a roll!!!
This poor unfortunate soul!!
Jean takes a deep breath and signs the scroll in fancy script just as Agatha sang the last line. The witch grins evilly and begins to wave her arms over the cauldron.
Beluga, sarruga, come winds of the Caspien sea!
Now raise a sartitis, set max laryngitis,
Negotiate to me!
"Now, sing!" Agatha commands as a pair of smoke hands come up and out of the cauldron.
Jean begins to sing and the smoke hands go towards her menacingly. They go into her mouth and pull out a small glowing orb. Jean closes her mouth and stares as the hands take away the orb, which continues to sing untill Agatha locks it into a small, golden spiral shell. Agatha then begins to laugh evilley as bubbles surround and press against Jean until they all become one giant bubble, with Jean trapped inside. Sparks fly as her tail splits into two seperate legs. The bubble bursts, and Jean struggles to swim to the surface for air. Sam and Remy immeadiatley break away from Lance and Pietro and help her swim to the surface.
"And cut, that's it for today." Ray says, flipping through AnonGirl88's clip board papers. Scott snatches it away from him.
"What? It can't end here! What about my scene?" he whines.
"Well these are the director's notes and the notes say to stop here for today." Ray says.
"But, but, but," Scott begins to stammer while Ray snatches the clip board back.
"It also says that in case she and the co-director, in this case Pyro, decide to hunt down anyone who managed to escape, Fishy is in charge."
"What?! That psychedelic psychotic shark is in cha-" Scott begins but Ray interrupts him.
"Scott, think about it." he says.
"Oh. You're right, at least Fishy is slightly more sane than his owner. At least he doesn't have an obsession with fire." Scott says.
"No, just bubbles." Other Dude says nonchalantly as he flies by in a miniature flying saucer. Scott and Ray exchange glances.
"He's joking, right?" Ray asks.
"Of course he is, after 'Finding Nemo', a bubbles obsessed shark would be a little too cliche', even for Anon's tastes." Scott says. "Right?"
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Heh, for anyone curious about the three mystery girls, they're my original characters. That means I own them, so don't steal them. So, will AnonGirl88 and Pyro be able to recover the missing Wolverine with the help of these girls? Is Fishy the purple and green shark really obsessed with bubbles, or is Other Dude lying as always? Find out in later chapters!
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Scott wheels in AnonGirl88, who has been confined to a straight-jacket and one of those wheel things used to haul around boxes and crazy people.
"Hey, let me out of this thing!" she yells, struggling as much as possible. "The sugar and caffeine are completley out of my system, so you can let me go!"
"Just say your lines." Scott says, depositing her in front of the camera.
"Fine. Hello, welcome to the sixth chapter of The Little Mermaid: Evolution. I am your director, AnonGirl88, and I hope you enjoy todays scene." she says in monotone before glaring at Scott. "If I ever make a Shrek parody, I'm making you Lord Farquad." she scowls.
"Nice try, but I'm not falling for it." he replies while wheeling her back off the set.
"And you wonder why nobody likes you." AnonGirl88 snaps.
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Hank is sitting in his throne, twirling the flower Jean gave him earlier.
"Oh, who could the lucky merman be?" he laughs to himself. Remy sneaks in and hides in the doorway. Hank notices and quickly hides the flower. "Oh, er, come in, Sebastion."
Remy swallows a huge lump in his throat and gives himself a little pep talk.
"Okay, no matter what happens, Remy's got to remain calm." he mutters before calmly walking up to the throne. "Yes?" he squeaks.
"Oh yeah, real smooth, Cajun!" Lance yells.
Remy glares at him then clears his throat.
"Yes, yo' Majesty?" he says calmly.
"Sebastion, I'm concerned about Ariel. Have you noticed anything peculiar?" Hank asks.
"Hmm, peculiar?" Remy parrots.
"You know, swimming around day dreaming, singing to herself? You hadn't noticed?" Hank says suspiciously.
"Oh, well, I, er, uh." Remy stutters.
"Sebastion." Hank motions to Remy to come closer, so Remy swims up to the arm of the throne. "I know you've been keeping something from me."
"Keeping something?" Remy repeats, getting very nervous.
"About Ariel." Hank prods.
"Ariel?" Remy gulps, starting to sweat.
"Is there an echo in here or what?" Pyro yells from backstage, also in a straight jacket like AnonGirl88.
"Is there an echo in here or what?"
"Oops, sorry!" Forge says. He adjusts the sound.
"In love, hmm?" Hanks prods with both voice and trident.
"Send in the stunt double!" AnonGirl88 yells from backstage. Todd walks in.
"Whoa, why does Remy need a stunt double?" Remy asks.
"Because when we did this scene in rehearsals, you couldn't even pretend to have a panic attack, remember?" AnonGirl88 says. "Where as Toad is the worlds best panicking person."
"Hey thanks!" Toad says, preening a little.
"That's just a nice way of calling you a coward." Pietro says.
"Quiet you, or I'll duck tape you to the ceiling and use you for a speed bag." AnonGirl88 says. Pietro yelps and runs off.
Todd and Remy switch places, and Todd immeadiatly starts to hyperventilate and soon looses it.
"I tried to stop her Sire! She wouldn't listen! I told her to stay away from humans! They are bad! They are trouble!" sobs Toad.
"Humans? WHAT ABOUT HUMANS?!" Hank bellows.
"Humans?" Toad laughs nervously. "Who said anything about humans?" he laughs nervously. Hank grabs him and the scene changes to Sam swimming in front of Jean.
"Flounder, why can't you just tell me where we're going?" she asks. They swim into her secret grotto.
"You'll see, it's a surprise!" Sam says. There in the middle of the room is the tacky statue of Scott. Jean gasps when she sees it and immeadiatley swims over to it.
"Oh my gosh!" she hugs Sam. "Flounder you're the best! It looks just like him! It even has his sunglasses!" she giggles and starts to flirt and hang on the statue. "Why Eric, run away with you? This is all so, so sudden!"
"Oh sure, Jean flirts with a cheap statue of Scott, nobody says a word. I name my lighter and suddenly I'm psychotic." AnonGirl88 pouts.
"Anon, you not only named your lighter, you claimed that it asked you to marry it." Lance says.
"Hey! You leave Julius out of this! And I made no such claim. I said that Pyro asked me to marry him" AnonGirl88 snaps.
"Which I did not!" Pyro responds.
"Excuse me, but would it be too much trouble to get on with this parody before the day is over?" Hank asks.
"Huh, oh yeah, get on with it already." AnonGirl88 says dismissivly. "Now somebody GET ME OUT OF THIS THING!!"
"I second that!" Pyro adds.
Jean spins around and sees a very angry looking Hank standing at the doorway.
"Daddy!" she exclaims.
"I consider myself a reasonable merman." he says coolly. "I set certain rules, and I expect those rules to be obeyed!"
"But Daddy-" Jean starts but then Hank cuts her off.
"Is it true that you rescued a human from drowning?"
"Daddy I had to."
"Contact with the human world is forbidden! Ariel, you know this!"
"He would have died!"
"One less human to worry about." Suddenly the Acolytes and Brotherhood start cheering.
"Quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 yells.
"You don't even know him!" Jean says angrilly.
"Know him? I don't have to know him, they're all the same! Spineless harpooning fish-eating vermin! Incapable of any real feeling." Hank says. The Acolytes and Brotherhood cheer even louder.
"I said quiet on the set!" AnonGirl88 screams.
"Daddy I love him!" Jean yells. She looks shocked at her own words, but not as shocked as Hank.
"No. Have you lost your senses completley? He's a human, you're a mermaid!" Hank exclaims
"I don't care." Jean says stubbornly.
"So help me, Ariel, I am going to get through to you!" Hank yells, powering up his trident, "And if this is what it takes, so be it!" And he immeadiatly starts blowing everything up.
"Yeah!! Burn, baby, burn!!" Pyro yells.
"Whoo-hoo!" AnonGirl88 hoots.
"Get those two out of here." Scott says. As the two psychotics are wheeled away, Hank continues to blow stuff up while Jean tries in vain to stop him. Hank finally aims at the statue, and KABOOM!!!! It's blown to pieces. Jean swims to her rock and starts crying. Hank swims away sadly, while Remy and Sam swim over to her.
"Ariel, Remy-" Remy begins, but Jean cuts him off.
"Just go away."
Remy looks hurt, but he and Sam do as she says. As soon as they're gone, Lance and Pietro the eels show themselves and begin to casually swim around above Jean.
"Poor child." Lance remarks.
"Poor sweet child." Pietro adds.
"She has a very serious problem."
"If only there was something we could do."
"But there is something."
"Who, who are you?" Jean sniffs.
"Don't be scared." Pietro says soothingly.
"We represent someone who can help you." Lance tells her as he and Pietro swim around her head and through her hair.
"Someone who can make all your dreams come true."
"Just imagine." They both say. "You and your prince, together, forever."
"I don't understand." Jean says.
"Ursula has great power." Pietro hisses.
"The sea witch?" Jean asks. "Why that, I couldn't possibly, no! Get out of here, leave me alone!" With that said, she buries her head in her arms again.
"Suit yourself." Lance says.
"It was only a suggestion." Pietro adds airlly.
As he and Lance swim to the doorway, he uses his tail to flick the broken face of the statue in Jeans direction. She glances up and looks at it. She picks it up, then calls out.
"Wait!"
"Yes?" Pietro and Lance turn around. Meanwhile, outside the entrance, Sam and Remy are sitting around feeling sad about what happend to Jean.
"Poor Ariel." Sam sniffs.
"Remy didn't mean to tell, it was an accident." Remy defends. A shadow passes over their heads. They look up and see Jean swimming away with Lance and Pietro. Remy quickly swims up.
"Ariel, where are you going?" He gets up in her face. "Ariel, what are you doing with dis riff-raff?"
"Who are you calling riff-raff, crab boy?!" Lance snaps.
"Just get on with it, Alvers!" Scott groans.
"Make me, Summers!" Lance yells.
"Scott, we've got a problem." Jamie says.
"Not now, Jamie." Scott says.
"But the director and co-director are gone!" the twelve year old says.
"WHAT! When did this happen?!" Scott yells.
"About five minutes ago, these three girls came by and got them out of their straight jackets and took off in a brown mini van."
"Oh no, by any chance was one of them eighteen with brown hair and brown eyes wearing a red t-shirt, blue jeans, a Giants baseball cap, and a watch that looks just like Kurt's image inducer?"
"Uh-huh."
"And was one of them sixteen with dirty blonde hair and grey eyes wearing a grey sweater and faded blue jeans?"
"Yup."
"And just out of curiousity, was the last one also sixteen but with really short black hair, amber eyes, and wearing a faded black tank top and ripped black jeans, with barbed wire tattoos just above her elbows?"
"How'd you know that?" Jamie asks. Scott smacks his head.
"Great, AnonGirl88's insane OC's have rescued her and Pyro. Who knows what those maniacs are planning?"
"Oh I know that, I over heard them say that they're going to hunt down Mr. Logan." Jamie responds. Scott sighs.
"Well that's a relief. At least we won't have to worry about them burning the set down again."
"Does that mean we can get back to the parody now?" Pietro yells.
"Yeah, yeah, get on with it!"
"I'm going to go see Ursula." Jean says before swimming off with the eels. Remy gasps and swims after her.
"Ariel, no! No, she's a demon!" Remy exclaims.
"Why don't you tell my father, you're good at that." Jean snaps. Remy looks defeated for a moment, then he waves his claw at Sam.
"Come on." he says. He and Sam follow the three conspirators through a bunch of dark and scary stuff. When they get to a coral reef that resembles a gigantic dinosaur, Jean hesitates.
"This way!" Lance and Pietro hiss. Jean then follows them in. As they swim past the sickly garden of sea weed like things, some of them start grabbing at Jean. She manages to struggle loose and swims well out of reach, then Agatha's voice floats through the water.
"Come in, come in my child. We mustn't lurk in doorways." Agatha comes out of her hiding spot, hands on her hips. "It's rude. One might question your upbringing." she chuckles and swims over to her sea shell vanity and begins putting mousse in her hair. "Now, you're here because you have a thing for a human, this prince fellow? Not that I blame you, he is quite a 'catch', isn't he?"
Agatha laughs at her own joke while Jean carefully swims closer. Agatha graps a small sea shell and squeezes it, revealing that it's lipstick.
"Well, angel fish. The solution to your problem is simple." she puckers her lips after applying the lipstick. "The only way to get what you want is to become a human yourself."
"Can you do that?" Jean asks. Agatha smiles evilly to herself then turns around to face Jean, a kind smile replacing the secret evil one.
"My dear, sweet child, that's what I do! It's what I live for, to help unfortunate merfolk, like yourself! Poor souls, with no one else to turn to."
'I admit that in the past I've been a nasty,
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch.
But you'll find that nowadays,
I've mended all my ways,
Repented, seen the light and made the switch.
True, yes!
And I fortunatley know a little magic.
It's a talent that I always have possessed.
And dear lateley, please don't laugh,
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed.
(Pathetic.)
Poor unfortunate souls,
In pain! In need!
In her cauldron, a non-skinny mermaid and a twig-thin merman appear, looking very sad.
This one longing to be thinner, that one wants to get the girl,
And I help them! Yes I do.
Agatha uses her magic and gives the mermaid a super-models upper body and gives the merman a bodybuilders upper body. The two then embrace happily.
Now it's happened once or twice,
Someone couldn't pay the price,
And I'm afraid I had to rake them across the coals.
She opens her hand to the two, but they shrug and hold out their arms, indicating they can't pay her. She uses her magic to turn them into the creepy little sea weed things.
Yes I've had the odd complaint,
But on the whole I've been a saint!
To those poor, unfortuanate souls!
"Now, here's the deal. I will make you a potion that will turn you into a human for three days." Agatha says, leading Jean over to her cauldron. "You got that? Three days. Now listen, this is important." She makes the cauldron show pictures to emphasise the situation. "Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to make dear old princey fall in love with you. That is, he's got to kiss you. Not just any kiss, the kiss of true love. If he does kiss you before the third day, you'll remain human permnanentley. But if he doesn't, you'll turn back into a mermaid and, you'll belong to me." she hisses the last three words dangerously.
"Non, Ariel!" Remy yells. Lance and Pietro quickly grab him and Sam and wrap around their mouths, muffling any more protests.
"Have we got a deal?" Agatha asks.
"If I become human, I'll never see my father or sisters again." Jean says sadly.
"That's right. But, you'll have your man." Agatha says. "Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?" she chuckles.
"It's a shame some of us didn't have a choice in doing this parody." Jason mutters off stage.
"Be quiet, Mastermind!" Scott yells.
"Oh, and there is one more little thing." Agatha adds, ignoring the interruption. "We haven't discussed the method of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know."
"But I don't have any-" Jean begins, but Agatha puts a tentacle over her lips, effectivley shutting her up.
"I'm not asking much. Just a token, really, a trifle! You'll never even miss it." Agatha says. "What I want is, your voice."
"My voice?" Jean asks, her hand at her throat.
"You've got it sweet cheeks, no more talking, singing, zip!" Agatha says.
"But without my voice, how can I-" Jean starts, but Agatha interrupts her.
"You'll have your looks! You're pretty face! And don't underestimate the importance of body language, ha!
'The men up there don't like a lot of blabber!
They think a girl who gossips is a bore!
Yes on land it's much preffered
For ladies not to say a word,
And after all dear what is idle chatter for?
Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation.
True gentlemen avoid it when they can.
But they dout and swoon and swan
On a lady who's withdrawn!
It's she who holds her tongue who gets her man!
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul!
Go ahead, make your choice!
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day,
It won't cost much, just your voice!
Agatha begins to throw a bunch of stuff into her cauldron as she sings, creating a lot of smoke and bubbles.
You poor unfortunate soul!
It's sad, but true!
She stands right behind Jean and forces a pen and scroll into her hand.
If you want to cross the bridge my sweet
You have got to pay the toll.
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll!
Out of Jeans ear shot, she quietly adds to Lance and Pietro:
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys!
The boss is on a roll!!!
This poor unfortunate soul!!
Jean takes a deep breath and signs the scroll in fancy script just as Agatha sang the last line. The witch grins evilly and begins to wave her arms over the cauldron.
Beluga, sarruga, come winds of the Caspien sea!
Now raise a sartitis, set max laryngitis,
Negotiate to me!
"Now, sing!" Agatha commands as a pair of smoke hands come up and out of the cauldron.
Jean begins to sing and the smoke hands go towards her menacingly. They go into her mouth and pull out a small glowing orb. Jean closes her mouth and stares as the hands take away the orb, which continues to sing untill Agatha locks it into a small, golden spiral shell. Agatha then begins to laugh evilley as bubbles surround and press against Jean until they all become one giant bubble, with Jean trapped inside. Sparks fly as her tail splits into two seperate legs. The bubble bursts, and Jean struggles to swim to the surface for air. Sam and Remy immeadiatley break away from Lance and Pietro and help her swim to the surface.
"And cut, that's it for today." Ray says, flipping through AnonGirl88's clip board papers. Scott snatches it away from him.
"What? It can't end here! What about my scene?" he whines.
"Well these are the director's notes and the notes say to stop here for today." Ray says.
"But, but, but," Scott begins to stammer while Ray snatches the clip board back.
"It also says that in case she and the co-director, in this case Pyro, decide to hunt down anyone who managed to escape, Fishy is in charge."
"What?! That psychedelic psychotic shark is in cha-" Scott begins but Ray interrupts him.
"Scott, think about it." he says.
"Oh. You're right, at least Fishy is slightly more sane than his owner. At least he doesn't have an obsession with fire." Scott says.
"No, just bubbles." Other Dude says nonchalantly as he flies by in a miniature flying saucer. Scott and Ray exchange glances.
"He's joking, right?" Ray asks.
"Of course he is, after 'Finding Nemo', a bubbles obsessed shark would be a little too cliche', even for Anon's tastes." Scott says. "Right?"
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Heh, for anyone curious about the three mystery girls, they're my original characters. That means I own them, so don't steal them. So, will AnonGirl88 and Pyro be able to recover the missing Wolverine with the help of these girls? Is Fishy the purple and green shark really obsessed with bubbles, or is Other Dude lying as always? Find out in later chapters!
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