FicWad

Bert looked up at the ceiling, staring into the darkness.
There was no sound on the bus but the soft, dull roar of the engine and the gentle, slow breathing of his bandmates.
His headphones blared as Jepha turned in his bunk with a grunt.
The plugs seemed to be feeding his mind numerous distractions from his thoughts..he found himself trying hard to get lost in the melodies, but to no avail....
the stinging, awful nuisance of a conscience kept his eyes open, blinking into the black above him.
Jepha snorted in his sleep, mumbling something inaudible before turning over once more.
The headphones remained jammed into Bert's ears as he struggled to drown out the past week through music.
He put his hand over his eyes, in an attempt to stop Lily from flashing before them.
And then, he felt it.
Deep in his stomach, the sudden tinge of pain, like his guts were being strung out and pulled...
The twisted, awful feeling deep within himself he couldn't ignore.
It was obvious to him why he felt the way he did...why,
suddenly,
his palms grew sweaty and his heart beat furiously as he thought of her laugh..even her occasional snort.
He tapped his Ipod gently with the tip of his finger, illuminating the screen;
3 am.
The first day of the tour was tomorrow..and it was gnawing at him..having to face her..to face THEM.
Gerard hadn't been a problem for the last month or so...and fuck, he really didn't even care but...yesterday had been...
He sighed as he thought of the way Lily looked up him...
His eyelids fluttered, failing the fight against fatigue.
The way she had looked at him...
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Quinn opened one eye reluctantly, awake from the sound of footsteps and zippers.
Bert sped past him, throwing his hood over his head in the blue light of the early morning.
Quinn raised one sleepy eyebrow and retreated back to his pillow, face pressed up against the fabric in bliss; blond hair brushing up against his cheek.
Bert stepped off the bus, bringing a cigarette to his lips and lighting it as he walked through the lot; a stern look on his face. The summer morning was eerily still, the sun high in the sky, melting away the early shadows, baking the blacktop and patches of brown grass. His converse pounded the pavement as he took a long drag, blowing the smoke into the still morning air; the only sounds the birds chirping and his own lips pressed softly against the marlboro filter. He nodded at the security guards as he walked past, away from the arena and into the town,
dressed in jean shorts and a tshirt, a black hoodie covering his thin, tatooed arms.
He crossed the street as the smoke entered his lungs, filling him with the familiar sick, scratchy feeling that served as a comfort.
Bert tapped the ash from his cigarette and inhaled deeply one last time before flicking it onto the pavement and entering the supermarket.
Heads raised as he walked through the automatic doors, hands in pocket.
Eyes wandered to his tattoos, his scraggly hair in need of a shower.
He was used to stares and whispers of disapproval....fuck, he loved it. He laughed to himself and pulled up his sleeves, revealing more ink, clearing his throat for extra emphasis.
An elderly woman placing a small, plastic bag of apples into her basket shook her head and slouched away, pushing the cart steadily while mumbling underneath her breath.
Bert stared at the signs hanging from the ceiling, bringing his thumb to his mouth and biting his nail with a chop chop chop...
"Can I ...HELP you?"
Bert turned his head carelessly, thumb still to mouth.
A man in an apron and tie stood before him.
Bert's eyes wandered slowly to his name tag; Rick- Manager.
He took one last bite and spoke,
"Yeah, Rick, I'm looking for Oreos."
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"Lily, get your FAT ASS out of my way!" Will grumbled, pushing Lily's skirted lower body out of his way. Their new bus was compromising in terms of space. Lily held her mascara in her hand, other hand to hip. She let out a grumble of disgust and continued to lean over the counter, eyes widened as she stared into the mirror; sweeping mascara over her lashes.
Ryan edged past her, already dressed.
Lily blinked and attempted to part a section of lashes with her finger nail.
She could see Will approaching out of the corner of her eye.
He paused next to her, leaning on the counter,
"Hey, can I use your hair straightener?"
Lily smirked, taking time to savor Will's moment of vulnerability.
He stood before her in shorts, chest bare. She stared at the freckles on his chest, his ribs visible beneath his pale, Swedish skin.
"Jesus Christ, Will," Lily began, staring into the mirror and fixing her eyelashes,
"You're so fucking skinny..." she trailed off and glanced at him; his arms across his chest, staring at her impatiently,
"Put on some of my sunscreen too..and yes..you can use it." she said with a sigh.
"Thanks..." Will grunted, "Maybe you should come up with a better nickname for me..instead of that 'butterball' shit. It's like I'm some..."
Will pulled out the hair straightener from Lily's bag,
"Fucking fatass kid in middle school..with two pb&j sandwiches or something." he mumbled, "Hey..wanna trade my holographic raichu for your chansey?" he said in a breathy voice, turning the heat up and disappearing into the back of the bus.
Adam slid past Lily, who was putting the finishing touches on her eyes,
"How about Captain Anorexia." he mumbled, causing Lily to laugh loudly.
Will walked back into the hallway, pulling on a white t-shirt over his head,
"What'd you say, Cure boy?" he said with a sneer.
Lily shook her head and walked to her bunk, pulling out a pair of shoes from underneath her bunk.
Will ran his fingers through his mane and pulled a piece of blond, razor cut hair forward, placing it between the hot plates carefully. He ran the iron over it, the lock now smooth and shiny. Will smirked, satisfied at the transformation.
He turned his head with a smile,
"Hey Lil," he called.
Lily turned around, bangs swept over her face.
Will grinned, forming a heart with his hands before continuing to straighten his hair across his forehead.
He laughed at himself as Lily rolled her eyes.
"Oh, Go fuck yourself Will." she grumbled, hitting him in the ribs as she walked by.
She slipped on her ballet flats, sweeping her bangs out of her face as she stood up.
She had pinned her hair back in a bun,painted her eyes with a thin line of black eyeliner, swept her eyelids with shimmering eyeshadow, and coated her long lashes with black mascara. She was wearing a light purple a-shirt (aka: 'wife beater') that clung to her waist and a leopard print mini-skirt, both of which she had gotten at Old Navy, paired with simple flats, bangles on her wrists and a few rings on her fingers. Her nails were painted black with a glittery over-coat.
"That's a cute skirt." Ryan commented, draining a capri-sun.
Lily nodded, looking down at it,
"Thanks..I got a zebra print one as well, it was so cheap, like 10 bucks and-"
Suddenly, she paused, doing a double take out the window.
"...No way, is that?" Will asked, flat iron to his forehead, peering out the window.
Ryan crushed the empty juice packet in his hand,
"Yep."
Adam looked up from his magazine,
"Looks like it." he said, eyes wandering back to the page in front of him.
Will put down the straightener and brushed his hair in front of his eyes.
He quickly unplugged it and pushed Lily aside, standing in front of the bus steps,
"Hey, get the fuck out of here, Bert." Will demanded, arms crossed.
Bert laughed slightly,
"Shut the fuck up, Will." he retorted in a tired voice.
"Oh, not 'butterball' today?" Will began as Lily pulled him away, stepping in front of him.
"Hey." she began, arms folded across her chest, a small scowl on her face, a vulnerability in her body language and a blur in her eyes that he knew was fear...was pain.
"Hey." Bert said, looking up at her at the top of the steps,
"Here." he said, extending a blue package,
"I got you these...I wasted some of yours, so..." he said, looking at the ground.
Lily gingerly took the package of Oreos in her hand and smiled a weak smile,
"Thanks."
Bert looked up from the pavement, hands in pockets,
"Sorry for being a dick." he added.
Lily had never seen him so weak before..so off his guard...
Lily nodded,
"It's ok."
Bert nodded slowly,
"I just..." he began loudly, then lowered his voice as he caught Will's glare of contempt through the tourbus window.
He gave Will a rude hand gesture with both hands and continued,
"Can we talk somewhere?" he asked quietly.
Lily looked at the cookies in her hand,
"Yeah..sure"