Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > And I Wish You Away
Chapter 11.
Mikey and I aproached Ray, Gerard, Lilana and Jamia, who were sitting in the coffee shop enjoying whatever was in their cups.
Gerard looked us up and down and shook his head, making a 'tsk" sound click on the edge of his tonuge. "That's what you get for going on walks in the rain Iero." He said, sucking on his red straw, releasing light brown liquid into his mouth.
"Yeah whatever, Mikey, will you get me a latte?" I dug through my pockets and pulled out a very wet 5 euro (Sorry to all you europians, if I got that wrong lol) and slapped it in his hand.
Mikey stared at the money for a second; but just shook his head and walked towards the counter to order me some very needed coffee.
I sat down beside Jamia and smiled at her weakly, pleasently surpised when she smiled back and slipped her hand into mine underneath the table. That didn't feel as good as I thought it would, making the neon JACKASS sign in my head go off again. I shook off the feeling and looked at the faces around the table, having quiet conversation in hushed voices.
Jamia smiled sweetly and made random comments on whatever they were talking about, making sure she squeezed the shit out of my poor hand in the process.
Obviously, she missed a few of her pills for her Bi-Polar disorder; lucky me. She would always get just insane if she missed her meds; maybe she decided to take them when she woke up?
"Frank? Hello earth to Frank!" Mikey was standing over me handing my coffee to me, looking at me like I was insane.
"Sorry." I said, my head hanging low, as I took the cup from his hand and releshed the warm sensation the coffee made in the pit of my throat.
Gerard raised his eyebrow at me while still listening Lilana blab on about how hot Glenn Danzig is.
"You ok Frank? You look pretty shitty." He said, handing me a paper napkin to wipe the water off my face.
I nodded through my sip of coffee and swalloed, "Yeah, I'm fine, just tired I guess."
Jamia stroked the side of my face, sending unwanted and suprisingly disguted shivers up my spine, "Do you want to go to bed now Frank?"
I could see her intentions written all over her sweet little face; but was too tired to refuse a good sleep.
"Yeah, I think I'm gonna go take a nap before the show, do you guys mind?"
Gerard shook his head, "Nah go catch some z's man, just don't leave us hanging again, ok? We've got to get out of here in three hours."
I nodded and was soon being pulled out of the room by a very in-a-hurry Jamia.
I sighed inwardly as she smiled the sexiest she could manage, and lead me into MY hotel room.
She kissed me violently and moved her hand to my lower region, looking up at me with lustful, hatefilled eyes, she paused. "Do you want me?" She asked, husky and out of breathe from her violent attempt to seduce me.
I smiled weakly and listend as an unvolintary groan built up in my throat, while she quickly shoved her hand in my boxers.
The satisfaction on her face was sickening, and I tried my best to make her believe I was enjoying her extremely bad hand job.
I bit my lip to stiffle a sob, watching her moan and feeling the overwhelming amount of pressure she was putting on me, as she gripped the back of my neck.
She stopped abruptly and shoved me back untill I fell on the bed, dreading the feeling of her skin on mine.
What's the matter with me? I was supposed to be in love with this woman, I was supposed to be responding to her touch, other than a disgusted shiver.
I tried my best to get my mind off of what I was half doing and what Jamia was fully into. She made love to me, almost as if she was also trying to convince herself that she loved me, when in reality, this meaningless fuck was just as painful and disgusting to her, as it was to me.
Just as soon as it had begun, it stopped. Jamia breathlessly climbed off of me and let her sweaty body fall onto the bed beside me.
I layed there, listening to her breathing and quiet sniffles, suprising myself with the overwhelming desire to run to the toilet and empty the contents of my stomach.
Time ticked by and the ceiling was beginning to get very boring. Jamia had passed out and was now cuddled up with a mere sheet covering her naked body, laying beside me.
Carefully, as to not wake physco bitch up, (what the hell is wrong with me?), I slid out from under the covers and padded to the bathroom.
I inspected my face in the mirror, deciding that I looked the worse I had ever looked in my life; and splashed some water on my face.
I scoffed at my reflection once more and then trudged back into the main room, digging through the clothes on the floor, searching for my Black Parade outfit. I didn't want to be late again, Gerard would kill me.
Lazily and half-hazardly, I dressed and said 'screw it' with makeup for the night.
I slipped on my shoes and quietly snuck out the door.
Lilana was making her way down the hall just as I shut the door to my room, smiling a very nervous smile.
"Hey, you nervous?" I asked her, as we walked down the long hallway. I noticed her Black Parade outfit, and wondered when in the world they had gotten that made. It couldn't have been Bob's, it fit perfectly around her womanly shape. Womanly? What is this, 1929? And why the hell was I staring like an idiot?
She smiled at me and patted my back, "Not as much as you look. Lighten up Frankie, before you give youself a heartattack."
I smiled weakly and played with the buttons on my jacket, thankful when we reached the lobby where the rest of the band, and Brian, were waiting for us.
"Ok guys, and girl, let's go" Brian said, leading the way out the door and into the bus.
The drive to the arena was deadly silent, except for the nervous breathes taken in by Mikey's inhaler.
I looked over at Lilana who was fidgeting with her cell phone, flipping it open and then closing it, flipping it open, closing it.....
It was making me anxious just watching her; not that I needed any additional stress at this point.
She caught me looking at her, and smiled at me, "I'm just nervous I guess, it'll be fine." She shoved her phone into her Sex Pistols bag lying on her lap and folded her arms.
I smiled and shook my head, "You're gonna be great Lil, we're all pretty nervous, I mean look at Mikey." I gestured toward a practically hyperventilating Mikey and earned a laugh from everyone in the bus.
Lilana shook her head and hid a clearly visible giggle from me.
The bus came to a stop and we all silently climbed out, one by one into the back of the frighteningly large arena.
There was no time for sound check, no time for practice, no time for breathing, we were on as soon as our feet stepped out onto the brightly lit stage.
I loved the stage, it always made me forget everything in my life, the lights and the way they swirled, dancing around me; just me and my guitar. Gerard and his luminiscent vampire swagger, as he glided across the stage, welcoming the idolization the kids gave him, as they raised their hands in praise. Mikey, calm and cool, not even breaking a sweat as his fingers thumped the bellowing sound of his bass. Ray, hair wildy vibrating against the heavy beat of "Teenagers", not even thinking twice when his fingers slid down the fret board of that guitar, breaking the song of it's mortality.
A hollow, empty feeling hit me as I turned my head towards the drums, Lilana was playing viciously, her hair bouncing off her shoulders and collecting back as she beat the drums as hard as her arms would allow.
Sweat was pouring down her face, already, and I felt my feet wanting to walk over to her and stare while she played flawlessly, a song she had only practiced once.
The music stopped, leaving echos of my guitar in the room, as Gerard screamed profanity at the audiance, followed by chants of: "Fuck em' all, fuck em' all!
"Thank you guys so fucking much!!" He raised his microphone in the air, earning another chant from the kids. "I want to introduce, our new drummer, and I'd say, new therepist," audiance giggled, "Lilana Mathews!!"
The crowd cheered wildly and Lilana stood from her stool, grabbing a microphone from beside her drum set.
"Thank all of you so much, for welcoming me into this family, for giving me a chance and not just spitting on me as soon as you saw me." She threw the microphone to the side and reseated herself on the little black stool.
The cheering died down as Gerard pressed his hand against the ceiling, silencing his army, "We all loved Bob, more than you kids will ever know, we miss him like hell and no that know one will ever replace him. But let's celebrate his life with this next song, it was his favorite."
The crowd roared and Ray began the intro for "Thank You For The Venom", as I followed suit.
Flooded thoughts of Bob swarmed me, and it was all I could do not to look over at the drums to see if this was all a joke, to see if he was sitting on that stool, playing his heart out.
Warm saliva spewed from Gerard's mouth as he took his next line to the song, from his heart, into the ears of everyone. "Love is the red, the rose on your coffin door."
He turned to me and sang against my hip, earning a sad smile from Ray, thinking of how Bob used to make fun of our 'gayness'.
"What's life like bleeding on the floor?"
My playing increased as he layed his head heavily on my shoulder, hiding from everyone else, the moister falling from his eyes.
"You'll never make me leave, I'll wear this on my sleave, give me a reason to believe, so give me all your posion, and give me all your pills, give me all your hopeless hearts and make me ill."
I played my heart out in those three minutes and fourty-one seconds, more than I ever have. I let everything with Jamia slip away, this was what was important right now, this was our purpose, right then and nothing else could stand in the way, of us and touching those kids.
Ok, so sorry if it sucked, I'm trying to get back into the groove, this took forever to write, which was gay. Anyways, as always this is for my lovely SafeFromRobotsDAMN, who is my hero =] (plus, I am creating wrinkles on her face with all my compliments)
Mikey and I aproached Ray, Gerard, Lilana and Jamia, who were sitting in the coffee shop enjoying whatever was in their cups.
Gerard looked us up and down and shook his head, making a 'tsk" sound click on the edge of his tonuge. "That's what you get for going on walks in the rain Iero." He said, sucking on his red straw, releasing light brown liquid into his mouth.
"Yeah whatever, Mikey, will you get me a latte?" I dug through my pockets and pulled out a very wet 5 euro (Sorry to all you europians, if I got that wrong lol) and slapped it in his hand.
Mikey stared at the money for a second; but just shook his head and walked towards the counter to order me some very needed coffee.
I sat down beside Jamia and smiled at her weakly, pleasently surpised when she smiled back and slipped her hand into mine underneath the table. That didn't feel as good as I thought it would, making the neon JACKASS sign in my head go off again. I shook off the feeling and looked at the faces around the table, having quiet conversation in hushed voices.
Jamia smiled sweetly and made random comments on whatever they were talking about, making sure she squeezed the shit out of my poor hand in the process.
Obviously, she missed a few of her pills for her Bi-Polar disorder; lucky me. She would always get just insane if she missed her meds; maybe she decided to take them when she woke up?
"Frank? Hello earth to Frank!" Mikey was standing over me handing my coffee to me, looking at me like I was insane.
"Sorry." I said, my head hanging low, as I took the cup from his hand and releshed the warm sensation the coffee made in the pit of my throat.
Gerard raised his eyebrow at me while still listening Lilana blab on about how hot Glenn Danzig is.
"You ok Frank? You look pretty shitty." He said, handing me a paper napkin to wipe the water off my face.
I nodded through my sip of coffee and swalloed, "Yeah, I'm fine, just tired I guess."
Jamia stroked the side of my face, sending unwanted and suprisingly disguted shivers up my spine, "Do you want to go to bed now Frank?"
I could see her intentions written all over her sweet little face; but was too tired to refuse a good sleep.
"Yeah, I think I'm gonna go take a nap before the show, do you guys mind?"
Gerard shook his head, "Nah go catch some z's man, just don't leave us hanging again, ok? We've got to get out of here in three hours."
I nodded and was soon being pulled out of the room by a very in-a-hurry Jamia.
I sighed inwardly as she smiled the sexiest she could manage, and lead me into MY hotel room.
She kissed me violently and moved her hand to my lower region, looking up at me with lustful, hatefilled eyes, she paused. "Do you want me?" She asked, husky and out of breathe from her violent attempt to seduce me.
I smiled weakly and listend as an unvolintary groan built up in my throat, while she quickly shoved her hand in my boxers.
The satisfaction on her face was sickening, and I tried my best to make her believe I was enjoying her extremely bad hand job.
I bit my lip to stiffle a sob, watching her moan and feeling the overwhelming amount of pressure she was putting on me, as she gripped the back of my neck.
She stopped abruptly and shoved me back untill I fell on the bed, dreading the feeling of her skin on mine.
What's the matter with me? I was supposed to be in love with this woman, I was supposed to be responding to her touch, other than a disgusted shiver.
I tried my best to get my mind off of what I was half doing and what Jamia was fully into. She made love to me, almost as if she was also trying to convince herself that she loved me, when in reality, this meaningless fuck was just as painful and disgusting to her, as it was to me.
Just as soon as it had begun, it stopped. Jamia breathlessly climbed off of me and let her sweaty body fall onto the bed beside me.
I layed there, listening to her breathing and quiet sniffles, suprising myself with the overwhelming desire to run to the toilet and empty the contents of my stomach.
Time ticked by and the ceiling was beginning to get very boring. Jamia had passed out and was now cuddled up with a mere sheet covering her naked body, laying beside me.
Carefully, as to not wake physco bitch up, (what the hell is wrong with me?), I slid out from under the covers and padded to the bathroom.
I inspected my face in the mirror, deciding that I looked the worse I had ever looked in my life; and splashed some water on my face.
I scoffed at my reflection once more and then trudged back into the main room, digging through the clothes on the floor, searching for my Black Parade outfit. I didn't want to be late again, Gerard would kill me.
Lazily and half-hazardly, I dressed and said 'screw it' with makeup for the night.
I slipped on my shoes and quietly snuck out the door.
Lilana was making her way down the hall just as I shut the door to my room, smiling a very nervous smile.
"Hey, you nervous?" I asked her, as we walked down the long hallway. I noticed her Black Parade outfit, and wondered when in the world they had gotten that made. It couldn't have been Bob's, it fit perfectly around her womanly shape. Womanly? What is this, 1929? And why the hell was I staring like an idiot?
She smiled at me and patted my back, "Not as much as you look. Lighten up Frankie, before you give youself a heartattack."
I smiled weakly and played with the buttons on my jacket, thankful when we reached the lobby where the rest of the band, and Brian, were waiting for us.
"Ok guys, and girl, let's go" Brian said, leading the way out the door and into the bus.
The drive to the arena was deadly silent, except for the nervous breathes taken in by Mikey's inhaler.
I looked over at Lilana who was fidgeting with her cell phone, flipping it open and then closing it, flipping it open, closing it.....
It was making me anxious just watching her; not that I needed any additional stress at this point.
She caught me looking at her, and smiled at me, "I'm just nervous I guess, it'll be fine." She shoved her phone into her Sex Pistols bag lying on her lap and folded her arms.
I smiled and shook my head, "You're gonna be great Lil, we're all pretty nervous, I mean look at Mikey." I gestured toward a practically hyperventilating Mikey and earned a laugh from everyone in the bus.
Lilana shook her head and hid a clearly visible giggle from me.
The bus came to a stop and we all silently climbed out, one by one into the back of the frighteningly large arena.
There was no time for sound check, no time for practice, no time for breathing, we were on as soon as our feet stepped out onto the brightly lit stage.
I loved the stage, it always made me forget everything in my life, the lights and the way they swirled, dancing around me; just me and my guitar. Gerard and his luminiscent vampire swagger, as he glided across the stage, welcoming the idolization the kids gave him, as they raised their hands in praise. Mikey, calm and cool, not even breaking a sweat as his fingers thumped the bellowing sound of his bass. Ray, hair wildy vibrating against the heavy beat of "Teenagers", not even thinking twice when his fingers slid down the fret board of that guitar, breaking the song of it's mortality.
A hollow, empty feeling hit me as I turned my head towards the drums, Lilana was playing viciously, her hair bouncing off her shoulders and collecting back as she beat the drums as hard as her arms would allow.
Sweat was pouring down her face, already, and I felt my feet wanting to walk over to her and stare while she played flawlessly, a song she had only practiced once.
The music stopped, leaving echos of my guitar in the room, as Gerard screamed profanity at the audiance, followed by chants of: "Fuck em' all, fuck em' all!
"Thank you guys so fucking much!!" He raised his microphone in the air, earning another chant from the kids. "I want to introduce, our new drummer, and I'd say, new therepist," audiance giggled, "Lilana Mathews!!"
The crowd cheered wildly and Lilana stood from her stool, grabbing a microphone from beside her drum set.
"Thank all of you so much, for welcoming me into this family, for giving me a chance and not just spitting on me as soon as you saw me." She threw the microphone to the side and reseated herself on the little black stool.
The cheering died down as Gerard pressed his hand against the ceiling, silencing his army, "We all loved Bob, more than you kids will ever know, we miss him like hell and no that know one will ever replace him. But let's celebrate his life with this next song, it was his favorite."
The crowd roared and Ray began the intro for "Thank You For The Venom", as I followed suit.
Flooded thoughts of Bob swarmed me, and it was all I could do not to look over at the drums to see if this was all a joke, to see if he was sitting on that stool, playing his heart out.
Warm saliva spewed from Gerard's mouth as he took his next line to the song, from his heart, into the ears of everyone. "Love is the red, the rose on your coffin door."
He turned to me and sang against my hip, earning a sad smile from Ray, thinking of how Bob used to make fun of our 'gayness'.
"What's life like bleeding on the floor?"
My playing increased as he layed his head heavily on my shoulder, hiding from everyone else, the moister falling from his eyes.
"You'll never make me leave, I'll wear this on my sleave, give me a reason to believe, so give me all your posion, and give me all your pills, give me all your hopeless hearts and make me ill."
I played my heart out in those three minutes and fourty-one seconds, more than I ever have. I let everything with Jamia slip away, this was what was important right now, this was our purpose, right then and nothing else could stand in the way, of us and touching those kids.
Ok, so sorry if it sucked, I'm trying to get back into the groove, this took forever to write, which was gay. Anyways, as always this is for my lovely SafeFromRobotsDAMN, who is my hero =] (plus, I am creating wrinkles on her face with all my compliments)
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