FicWad

Chapter 21
Gerard walked Alice outside for a second.
"So, you done shattering a girl's poor heart?"
Gerard shook his head 'no', "I'm just tired"
"Gee, that's a relieve" She sighed, annoyed once more.
"And willing to give a girl the benefit of the doubt. Or at least try"
He almost smiled. She turned to him.
"Thank God! What they slip you, though? I'm just curious..." She teased with a roll of eyes.
"I'm not always a monster, you know..." He began then decided to drop the subject.
They walked around the place's outside and stopped at a bench, sitting down.
"So...are you going out with Frank?" Gerard asked, unable to restrain the edge on his voice.
"No" She said simply. He snorted and glared at her.
"What happened to 'willing to give the benefit of the doubt'?" Alice said, starting to stand up.
"Stay" He said simply, and she sat back down instantly. "I meant to say that it doesn't seem like it..." Gerard explained, looking at her apprehensively. She shot a quick glance at his eyes and clarified in a nonchalant voice, "He only sees me as a friend and so do I"
Gerard nodded, trying to believe her. She could clearly see that he wasn't quite comfortable with her answer. "But we have a sort of.../weird/ friendship. For a moment I thought he was into me, and I into him. But he's not who I thought he was...or I mean, not who I want 'him' to be. And I guess I'm not his type of girl either"
Gerard looked up at the sky and sighed, obviously frustrated, "How can you say something like that? Is not as if you've known him long, I've known him my whole life and I wouldn't be able to tell who's his kind of chick-"
"Then I guess it's a feeling of mine" She piped in, obviously wanting to drop the subject for good.
There was a silence. Not so awkward, just...one of those needed silences.
"Are you into drugs?" Gerard asked in a thin voice.
"Yes" She responded, looking at him in the eyes.
"Why?" He asked, not caring if he showed how concerned and interested he was to hear her out.
"Because I'm lonely" She stated plainly.
He nodded in understanding and drifted away in his thoughts.
"Why do you drink so much?" Alice asked him, thinking that perhaps she had crossed the thin line that in Gerard's case separated what could be said and what couldn't.
He was silent. She knew she wouldn't respond and after a couple of minutes they stood and walked to the gig again. Alice went her way and Gerard went his, not crossing another word.
It was weird, but for some reason she felt 'connected' to him, although they hadn't talked much nor did he seem to like her at all. It had just been a connection. The kind of connection she felt on stage with her band. Perhaps it was just that, she and Gerard had performed together so that bonded them.
Yes, it was just that.
Just that.

Barrios was on Jess' lap talking about Pink Floyd's 'The Wall' with the rest of the LWU guys. Ben was standing on a corner looking at them. He was so bored and he didn't see Alice anywhere. He noticed the door had opened and there entered-
Shit.
Had he had too much beer? Was that Gerard and Alice/? He went toward his band mates and she walked to where hers where standing. She halted when noticing Ben's eyes upon her. She gave him a big smile, her electric blues shinning. He softened, then remembered she had been out for a while and that /he had just entered by her side.
"What was that all about?" He asked, concerned.
"Huh?" Alice said, making an effort to jump on the bar's tall counter. Ben gave her a lift as he specified, "On stage with Gerard. Weird click. You disappearing. Bang, you entering with Gerard"
"You surely are a sentence expert, aren't you? What would Mrs Fifi say about you?"
"Alice" He said, almost in a reproachful way, that sort that only a big brother or mother can pull off.
"There was nothing. I don't have to give you any explanations, Ben." She said, taking the rum with Coke that she had requested to the bar tender with a smile and a swift nod.
"Bull"
Alice flinched. Ben didn't swear at her much. She hated it when he did. Thankfully, Barrios came to her at that moment.
"I want to go home and Jess won't drive me. Help me"
"Sure" Alice jumped off the counter and finished all of her rum and coke glass in one gulp.
"JESS!! YOU'RE DRIVING BARRIOS AND ME HOME RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR I'LL SMASH YOUR NINTENDO TO SHREDS!"
"Dammit, you had to go and find /her/?"
"Yeah, I want to go home" Barrios said, stomping her foot to the floor.
"You don't get, do you?" Alice asked as the three of them entered the SUV, "She's horny and wants to screw you" Alice explained matter-of-factly.
"Shut up bitch!" Barrios shrieked
"Shut up, hoe" Alice hissed, "I'm doing you a motherfucker favour"

By the time they got home Jess and Barrios were almost at it in the SUV. Alice encouraged them to please enter the house that she would stay outside for some time. It wasn't long until her cellphone rang.
"Where the fuck are you? We went outside to look for you and you were gone and so was the SUV" Brian snapped in the phone, he hated being forgotten.
"Shit. I'll go pick you guys up right away." Alice hung up and entered the house, taking Jess' keys from the counter and ignoring the trail of clothes leading to his bedroom.
Driving always made her uneasy. Specially the big SUVs Jess rented all the time. Thank god she hadn't smoked the joint she was planning on lighting just before Brian called. She parked and called Brian, there was no answer. She sighed and left the car, locking it up. She entered the gig and found them talking to...
Yes, My Chemical Romance.
She walked to them and tapped Brian's shoulder.
"Your drive's here Mr" She kidded, hugging him to release his rage at her. He smiled, almost too un-Brianish. Frank giggled.
"What did you do to him, Frank?"
Frank laughed maniacally, "He was too sober"
Alice tagged along laughing. Ben had a frown on, "Why didn't you un-sobered Ben here?"
Frank shrugged and rubbed his arm, "He's got a big fist and the fucker's quick, that's why"
"Lets go" Ben mouthed. Alice nodded and locked eyes with Gerard briefly.
"Bye guys. Nice to meet you Bob, Ray" They responded back and Gerard grabbed her arm, a bit to rough. Ben glared at him.
"A word" She nodded and threw the keys to Ben.
"Only a minute" She told him as he turned his back to her. Gerard hadn't let go.
The rest of My Chem shooed away.
"Because...because I'm lonely" He spat.
She was silent for a second, then grasped what he was saying.
She nodded, "I understand" She turned away to leave but his grip got tighter.
Alice turned back to him, staring at his hazel eyes for the very first time without fear or rage. They were the softest she had ever seen them.
"I don't want to be alone"
What was he talking about?
Why in the world would he tell her this?
She searched his eyes, scanned them as she always did. They were about to tear up.
Then they got the rage she had begun to get used to and let go of her arm.

She didn't get him.
He had thought for a minute that she might but she didn't.
Heaven knows where the fuck she had learned he felt alone and said that to him, to make him like they could relate.
"Go" He snapped, his temper coming back.
She froze for a second, then turned on her heels and left.
He was alone.
He was alone.
Alone.
Alone.