Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Kill All Your Friends
Chapter 30
It had been a long year, but I was finally out. I had my backpack and a few suitcases with me and I turned around to see the white building I had been living in. The first months had been pretty shitty. You know, 'cause you're not allowed to anyone you care about and all of that shit. But on the other hand I took that time to work on some lyrics...at first they were pretty depressing, but good nonetheless; I'd still have to work with Ben on some, though.
Shit, I'm trailing off...After those first months I was able to talk to everyone. The guys told me all about the tour and they're ideas for the cd's name, asked if I had written my 'thank you' yet and talked to me about the guitarist they had had for my replacement. They whined about having a messy bus, and how they guy didn't make them shower so they were a foursome of stinky, unclean guys.
Kamz's relationship with Pete had been good so far, with just minor distance problems. She had been freaking out when I called her; the poor girl had needed someone to talk to for those months and had had a very rough time. She ended up moving with Pete. She was static. So was he. Hence, so was I.
Barrios and Jess were now officially 'fuck buddies'. They were in no relationship whatsoever. They just fucked. And fucked and fucked.
Bert had had a blast on tour, but was even happier to return home to Daniel, to whom my situation had been explained and he understood. I talked to him a few times, but mostly just wrote to him. He liked the way I write.
There had been to trace of Gerard.
Not one call, not one message.
It was around Christmas time again, so I had made up my mind about having a blast. The end of last year had been my most depressing moment in rehab. I still wasn't able to talk to any of my loved ones so I tried to kill myself.
I really did.
I mean, I looked for a freaking knife EVERYWHERE. I even got the nerve to sneak into the kitchen. But dammit, those doctors know how to stash knifes 'cause I didn't find one. Not one.
I opened the cab's door and told him my address, closing the door behind me. I had gotten a lot skinner and my hair was already longish and the color was wearing off. My hair grew pretty fast to it was a bit below my shoulders now and the blue was already half way down.
As I looked out the window to the passing trees I started thinking about the upcoming Christmas. I already had my Christmas presents, so I didn't have to worry about that. I had knit thousands of things: you know, sweaters, scarves, socks...even hats and purses. I know it sounds weird that I knit but in rehab they told us to choose something to distract ourselves so I chose fucking knitting.
So yeah, I had those presents and a couple of other things I bought on E-bay. I was just glad I was coming home and spending it with the guys, Kamz, Bert and Daniel. It would be rad. At least I hoped it would.
I finally got home. I paid the driver and got out, taking my backpack and suitcases with me. There were a lot of people around my building, which was usual. I entered it and saluted the porter. I went up and opened the door, my apartment was a mess. Clearly Ben had been living in it until my food ran out. God, I wonder how much money he ended up throwing out the window every moth.
I threw my luggage on my bedroom and cleaned up. I called everyone that was interested in my coming back and told them I'd see them tomorrow on Christmas night, we were supposed to exchange presents at my place. I laid in my bed curled up in a ball crying, just happy tears splashing down my cheeks.
I was so glad I was home again.
So glad.
And the drug and alcoholism program really worked too.
As I passed the liquor I had displayed on my entrance I almost threw up at the sight of them. I quickly threw them about and only let some extremely expensive wine I had. The rest went to the bin.
Everything.
As well as the drugs I had left home.
All out.
Millions of dollar worth of drugs and alcohol.
But my life was more important, right?
Yeah, right.
Who was I kidding?
My live meant crap to me.
I just did this because I know that, surprisingly enough, there are people who care about my life, and would be hurt if I didn't exist.
I mean, like they really cared.
Apart from my friends and family there were other people that cared.
I opened a Live Journal on the clinic and you'd be surprised about what people wrote to me. It was unbelievable.
"Guess who's back" Frank told Gerard when he saw him, a couple of hours after Alice had called him saying she was home and thanking him for the presents and emails.
"Who?" Gerard asked distractedly as he searched for his drawing pad which he had misplaced, yet again.
"Alice" Frank stated simply, earning an eager glance from Gerard. Gerard quickly went to the front door and grabbed his coat and his car keys.
"Shit, you're driving to Vegas? A day before Christmas eve? Gerard, your mother asked you to be here this time and you promised you would"
Gerard stopped and painfully went back.
"you're right" He said, helpless.
Frank smirked, he hadn't even tried to hide his feelings for Alice this time.
"But you never said anything about leaving after it was over, did ya?"
Gerard looked up and grinned, "Thanks, man"
Author's Note
So, I'm currently reading 'Catcher in the Rye' so if you catch a bit of a different kind of writing or my characters might sound a bit different it's because of that. Sorry.
Oh, and by the way. I really do knit. I learned like a week ago. I'm doing a pink scarf.
So, if you rate & review I'll knit you something! Lol!
It had been a long year, but I was finally out. I had my backpack and a few suitcases with me and I turned around to see the white building I had been living in. The first months had been pretty shitty. You know, 'cause you're not allowed to anyone you care about and all of that shit. But on the other hand I took that time to work on some lyrics...at first they were pretty depressing, but good nonetheless; I'd still have to work with Ben on some, though.
Shit, I'm trailing off...After those first months I was able to talk to everyone. The guys told me all about the tour and they're ideas for the cd's name, asked if I had written my 'thank you' yet and talked to me about the guitarist they had had for my replacement. They whined about having a messy bus, and how they guy didn't make them shower so they were a foursome of stinky, unclean guys.
Kamz's relationship with Pete had been good so far, with just minor distance problems. She had been freaking out when I called her; the poor girl had needed someone to talk to for those months and had had a very rough time. She ended up moving with Pete. She was static. So was he. Hence, so was I.
Barrios and Jess were now officially 'fuck buddies'. They were in no relationship whatsoever. They just fucked. And fucked and fucked.
Bert had had a blast on tour, but was even happier to return home to Daniel, to whom my situation had been explained and he understood. I talked to him a few times, but mostly just wrote to him. He liked the way I write.
There had been to trace of Gerard.
Not one call, not one message.
It was around Christmas time again, so I had made up my mind about having a blast. The end of last year had been my most depressing moment in rehab. I still wasn't able to talk to any of my loved ones so I tried to kill myself.
I really did.
I mean, I looked for a freaking knife EVERYWHERE. I even got the nerve to sneak into the kitchen. But dammit, those doctors know how to stash knifes 'cause I didn't find one. Not one.
I opened the cab's door and told him my address, closing the door behind me. I had gotten a lot skinner and my hair was already longish and the color was wearing off. My hair grew pretty fast to it was a bit below my shoulders now and the blue was already half way down.
As I looked out the window to the passing trees I started thinking about the upcoming Christmas. I already had my Christmas presents, so I didn't have to worry about that. I had knit thousands of things: you know, sweaters, scarves, socks...even hats and purses. I know it sounds weird that I knit but in rehab they told us to choose something to distract ourselves so I chose fucking knitting.
So yeah, I had those presents and a couple of other things I bought on E-bay. I was just glad I was coming home and spending it with the guys, Kamz, Bert and Daniel. It would be rad. At least I hoped it would.
I finally got home. I paid the driver and got out, taking my backpack and suitcases with me. There were a lot of people around my building, which was usual. I entered it and saluted the porter. I went up and opened the door, my apartment was a mess. Clearly Ben had been living in it until my food ran out. God, I wonder how much money he ended up throwing out the window every moth.
I threw my luggage on my bedroom and cleaned up. I called everyone that was interested in my coming back and told them I'd see them tomorrow on Christmas night, we were supposed to exchange presents at my place. I laid in my bed curled up in a ball crying, just happy tears splashing down my cheeks.
I was so glad I was home again.
So glad.
And the drug and alcoholism program really worked too.
As I passed the liquor I had displayed on my entrance I almost threw up at the sight of them. I quickly threw them about and only let some extremely expensive wine I had. The rest went to the bin.
Everything.
As well as the drugs I had left home.
All out.
Millions of dollar worth of drugs and alcohol.
But my life was more important, right?
Yeah, right.
Who was I kidding?
My live meant crap to me.
I just did this because I know that, surprisingly enough, there are people who care about my life, and would be hurt if I didn't exist.
I mean, like they really cared.
Apart from my friends and family there were other people that cared.
I opened a Live Journal on the clinic and you'd be surprised about what people wrote to me. It was unbelievable.
"Guess who's back" Frank told Gerard when he saw him, a couple of hours after Alice had called him saying she was home and thanking him for the presents and emails.
"Who?" Gerard asked distractedly as he searched for his drawing pad which he had misplaced, yet again.
"Alice" Frank stated simply, earning an eager glance from Gerard. Gerard quickly went to the front door and grabbed his coat and his car keys.
"Shit, you're driving to Vegas? A day before Christmas eve? Gerard, your mother asked you to be here this time and you promised you would"
Gerard stopped and painfully went back.
"you're right" He said, helpless.
Frank smirked, he hadn't even tried to hide his feelings for Alice this time.
"But you never said anything about leaving after it was over, did ya?"
Gerard looked up and grinned, "Thanks, man"
Author's Note
So, I'm currently reading 'Catcher in the Rye' so if you catch a bit of a different kind of writing or my characters might sound a bit different it's because of that. Sorry.
Oh, and by the way. I really do knit. I learned like a week ago. I'm doing a pink scarf.
So, if you rate & review I'll knit you something! Lol!
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