FicWad

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Chapter 12 - I Tried To Tell You Before I Left
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"Mommy's home!!" Patrick said excitedly to Aimee.

"Hey Mom!" Rory said,

"Hey baby." She said, kissing his head firmly.

"How was therapy?" he asked, Shay looked at her son with a smile.

"It was good Rory." She said, ruffling his hair.

Actually I'm about to break all of your hearts but I'll get to that part later... her weaker voice in her head muttered.

Patrick approached Shay and she got nervous, the affection was forced between them lately but he didn't seem awkward this time, he took her face in his hands and gently kissed her lips.

"I love you." he whispered. Shay nearly lost it right then.

"I know you do!" she said, he noticed her eyes watering up.

"We're going to get through this, you know that don't you?" he whispered, softly kissing her lips again.

"I don't know." She said, her shoulders shrugging.

"I'll never let you carry this load by yourself, do you understand?" he asked, he stroked her cheek gently, her tears slipped out and onto his affectionate fingers.

"I'm in such a bad place right now." She said, swallowing and then looking at him.

"I'm here for you Shaylese." He said, using her full name when he wanted her to understand his conviction. She gripped his wrists desperately and began crying and it wasn't long before the good guy was holding his wife tightly, whispering that everything would be alright.

---

Rory and Aimee were in bed just as normal, Patrick and Shay were blessed with amazing children, despite the riddled formalities of how it should've been done.

Natalie was more restless and didn't sleep well, she woke much more than the other 2 ever did and was more difficult to communicate with. She lay crashed out on the sofa in-between Shay's legs where she stroked her hair softly and enjoyed watching her daughter go to the place where you could forget.

"I'll take her to bed." Patrick said, as he went to lift her.

"No- I...I just want to keep her here with me for a little longer....she's therapeutic for me." Shay said, carrying on her stroking of Natalie's soft locks.

"You're right....she is therapeutic!" he said smiling and stroking her leg gently.

They sat for a long time in quietness, hearing only Natalie stir occasionally, her clumsy fist rubbing against her face.

"What would you have expected me to do if you had died Shay?...." he asked her spontaneously. Shay started shaking her head.

"Don't make me think about it-"

"-Shay, I'm sorry - but I have to know."

"I don't know!" she said frustrated.

Patrick nodded, although she was home, although she was smiling here and there, she was still weighed down.

"Ok..." he whispered, he touched her thigh gently.

"I'm sorry." He said.

---

Patrick watched Shay climb under the sheets and for the first time, she didn't turn her back to him.

"Hi." She whispered gently,

"Hi." He smiled,

Shay could only watch him nervously for a few seconds before he broached the boundaries she'd shut him out of recently and he kissed her tenderly, his hand resting on her waist. Shay's eyes remained opened as she watched him kiss her, attempting to deepen his attempt, she opened her lips and he moaned suddenly, a feeling lost that had been re-found.

Patrick felt her resist him the whole way through the encounter but she wasn't stopping him. If he knew Shay well enough, he knew it was her boundaries guarding her so that she wouldn't be exposed any further than she already was.

Shay watched him the whole time, watched him undress her and then himself.

"Be gentle..." she whispered as he nestled between her thighs.

"I will." He kissed her softly.

Patrick was soft, loving and patient as he made love to her, controlling himself hard. He had to allow Shay's sense of delicacy overcome his sense of tension and she helped him by slowing him down and guiding the strength of his strokes.

The only time they had sex like this was after the children, the soft, caring, gentle type that involved holding back on Patrick's part.

Shay felt his body weight increase on her as he found it harder to hold back and she clutched his lower back in her hands and sanctioned for him to enjoy the last few moments of this with her. She arched into him as he came, almost feeling his tension too as he let go. His breathing was scattered and he pressed his head against her face.

"Are you OK?" he asked, Shay nodded and smiled softly.

"I needed to be close to you so much!" he said desperately, burying his face into her hair and kissing her ear gently.

"I know." She whispered, looking at the ceiling.

I don't deserve him, I don't deserve him even a little, he loves me without restraint... she was torn inside.





Breakfast the next morning was almost blissful, the whole family was there. Natalie squawked loudly and threw various items from her high chair across the table, Patrick froze as a piece of banana slapped across his face and stuck to him. Shay burst out laughing and the kids roared with laughter, even Natalie joined in the fun and clasped her hands together tightly, squealing at her triumph.


"Thank you Natty." Patrick said, pulling the fruit off his cheek and trying to get it off his fingers on to his plate.

Patrick looked at Shay who stopped smiling when she saw him stare at her.

"Mom-M-M-Mom!" Aimee said, tugging at Shay's sleeve. Shay turned and looked down at her fair haired daughter.

"You um, you and Dad, um, You and Dad." She stuttered, Shay knew she stuttered when she was anxious and carefully moved her chair to face her girl, giving gave her full attention but Aimee continue to stutter.

"Aimee look at Mommy." She said, Aimee did, straight away.

"Take a big, big big breath!" she said, taking one in too and Aimee followed. They both let it out.

"Look at mommy!" she said, Aimee looked back to her.

"Now, what did you wanna say....speak slowly." She said.

"C-C-Can you and, and and..." she stopped. Rory burst into a fit of giggles.

"Rory don't laugh at your sister please!" Patrick told him off. He looked sheepish and sunk in his chair.

"Aimee...." Shay said gently, she put a hand under her chin and made her look at her.

"One word at a time...ok....look at me." She said, Aimee looked embarrassed and she sighed.

"Can. You. And. Daddy. Take. Us. Out. Today." She finally managed to say.

"Good girl. " She said and kissed her cheek firmly.

"Of course we can take you out, where do you wanna go?" she asked.

"I wanna go swimming!" Rory instructed.

"You wanna go swimming sweetheart?" Shay asked Aimee who looked down and shook her head.

"What do you wanna do? Maybe we can do a bit of what everyone wants to do!" Shay said.

"Art." She said simply.

"You wanna do art? We can do art!" Shay said, pulling her daughter up onto her lap.

"Awww art is for pussies." Rory said.

"Woah!" Shay said

"Rory Stump!!" Patrick said angrily.

"What? It is!"

"You do not use language like that, you understand me?" Patrick asked, a deep frown on his forehead.

"Pete says it."

"Don't listen to Pete!" Shay said.

Rory went quiet. He scowled at Aimee, who turned her head into Shay's chest.

"That's enough Rory!" Patrick said.

"Can't I do anything?!" he shouted angrily.

"You go to your room!" Patrick shouted back, Natalie immediately cried, hearing her Dad's angry voice.

"Fine!" he yelled back, shoving his chair away from the table and storming up the stairs to his room.

Patrick sat for a moment, Shay and Aimee were silent and Natalie wailed at the top of her lungs.

"You need to comfort her Patrick." Shay softly reminded him. Patrick stood up and lifted Natty out of her chair.

"I'm sorry sweety - it's ok, I'm sorry for shouting." He said softly and cradled her.


And just like that, the family bliss was now a knotted web of frustration, confusion and anxiety. Finally the backlash of the last few weeks were surfacing through the children's behaviour. Shay could only blame one person for all of it:

Herself.




SO CECE WENT AND GOT HERSELF A GREAT JOB AND I'M PUTTING THIS CHAPTER OUT TO KEEP YOU ALL RESTRAINED UNTIL WE CAN WORK TOGETHER TO GET THE JUICY STUFF OUT ( WOW, THAT SOUNDED DIRTY...) BYGONES, I'M ASKING ALL OF YOU TO EXCERCISE PATIENCE AND IN THE MEANTIME CHECK OUT MY NEW STORY. THAT'S RIGHT, I HAVE NO SHAME...