FicWad

From that day everything started to go down hill, I drank by night and cut and smoked by day with Billy.
We did it daily, sometimes at his place and sometimes when no one was home at my place.
It felt good, I would watch the little scars on my wrist and feel like it's my little secret, something that only Billy and I shared.
Even though I didn't like the proccess of cutting because it made me miserable each and every time, I felt special, I felt marked.

Mikey and I were in the kitchen, making dinner.
Actually we were deciding which frozen meal to make, but making dinner sounded more like home.
"Sky what is it?", suddenly Mikey grabbed my wrist harshly, he stared at my wrist with his eyes wide open.
Fuck I forgot to wear the wrist band Billy gave me, "Scars", I saw no point of hiding what in my eyes made me special.
"Since when do you cut?", Mikey screamed at me.
"Since I want to", I pulled away my hand from his grip.
"What happened to you? Since you met that Billy guy I don't even know you! You cut, you drink, you smoke!", Mikey turned deep shade of red.
How dare he lecture me?!, he was drinking with me just the other night.
"Look, I didn't move out of my mothers house for you to become my step mother, I will cut, I will drink, and I will smoke all I want", I glared at him, stamping my foot like I used to do when I was 5.
"God, I don't need another Gerard! I don't want to be scared of picking up the phone in case the police wants to inform me someone of you cut too deeply or found their drunken death under a fucking bush! Do you hear me Skyler??".
But I refused to listen and stormed off to my room.
Fuck them! Why is it OK for them to do things but not for me? For the first time in years I feel free and cool! I'm enjoying myself, what's so bad about it?
I wore the metallica wrist band Billy gave me.
I layed on my back, staring at the ceiling, my thoughts racing.

The doorbell rang, I didn't bother to move, I heard muffled voices, they belonged to Gerard and Frank.
Great, all I wanted is to be left alone, maybe I should just pretend I was sleeping.
Hour passed of me pretending to be asleep but Gerard didn't come in.
I decided to come out, I was starving and curious about why he didn't come in.
I came out of my room and walked to the living room.
Mikey, Gerard and Frank were sitting there looking grave.
I bended over to kiss Gerards head but he moved away, he stood up and grabbed my arm, ripping the wrist band off.
"You just couldn't keep your fucking mouth shut, could you?", I screamed at Mikey.
"Skyler", Gerard was still holding my arm.
I jerked my arm away, "Just leave me alone!"
Gerard made a movement, he wanted to hug me but I yelled at him, "All of you, just fuck off!!".
I grabbed my jacket off the rack and stormed of the house, slamming the door as hard as I could.
Fucking Gerard! Fucking Mikey! Fuck them all!.
I hated Mikey for telling Gerard and I hated Gerard for caring.
I knew I acted like a total bitch but I didn't care.
I was tired of Mikey telling Gerard everything I did, it was like living with a spy.
I get all the brotherly shit and I would understand if he was telling him if I was cheating on him or messing around with guys but I didn't, and it was none of their bussiness what I did with myself!
I seriously didn't understand what was the big deal. Fucking drama queens!
My legs automatically carried me to Billy where my comfort lay in a basket and in the mini bar.

That night I didn't come back home, we didn't go to school either. What was the point?.
On the next day I went back, I choose a hour I knew Ray and Mikey would be away and crept back home.
I was about to unlock the front door but it wasn't locked.
I entered the living room and there were all of them.
Mikey rubbed Gerard's back, who's hands were in his hands.
Alison was siting in Ray's lap, speaking to him softly.
Frank was passing and Bob sat quietly lost in thoughts.
"Sky", Frank was the first one to spot me, they all looked up and the next thing I knew I was caught in the middle of a very tight group hug, it annoyed me. They didn't understand!.
"We were worried sick!", exclaimed Alison, pulling me into a bone crashing hug.
"You scared the shit out of us", Frank pulled my hair.
"Yeah, don't do it anymore", Ray slapped my arm gently.
"Stop babying me!", I snapped, wriggling away from them, "I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself".
They all looked at me with amazement.
Then I caught Gerard's gaze, it was unfocused. he was drunk .How predictable!.
He was a hypocrite like the rest of them, he was preaching but not following his own advise, I was sick of it all!.


Thank you for all the reviews! It's really great to know someone enjoy this story and actually think I can write..Who whould have thought I can do something right....
So once again than you!!!!!!!