Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > I've Got the Gift of One Liners

Just don't bite my head off

by rejected_smurf_god 1 review

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR!!!!!!!

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Characters: Bob Bryar, Frank Iero, Gerard Way, Mikey Way, Ray Toro - Published: 2007-07-16 - Updated: 2007-07-16 - 1724 words

0Unrated
Finally, the day had come and Sarah was well enough to leave. The bonds of disease were broken and she was free. As you can imagine Frank could never have been any happier.

A day later Mikey called Matt and the tour was now back on. The anxious fans would finally get to hear them once again. Being on the road was cool except you know when the guys totally trash the bus or you know all those gross things men do. Burp, fart, play video games. All that which I just love so so much! I hope you could hint my sarcasm there. But I just enjoy having everyone around.

I was currently writing some song lyrics that I had just had floating around in my head. I'm not like anything close to like what the guys do with my lyric writing. To me they were just a way to get things off of my mind every once in a while. With lyrics, the great ones do not hit me that often, but I've come up with some pretty good ones.

The guys were doing one of those things I listed. Not the first two thankfully, but the third one. It was like Guitar Hero I think. I totally suck at that game. Sarah is the only who has some skills with it, but she's a video game geek.

She's mainly been spending quality with us girls or Frank.

Shutting my notebook of lyrics and setting it back in my bag I opened the curtain of Ray's bunk. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw a grinning Emma right in my face.

"Nadia, I have yet to have made you scream." She pouted.

"And I'm glad you haven't." I said getting up out of the bunk.

"So what are you doing all up in your man's bunk?" She asked making emphasis on the word 'man'.

"I was just writing stuff." I answered.

"Oh, well how about you come outside with everybody else?" She suggested. I had forgotten we weren't moving at the moment.

"And what is everybody doing outside?" I asked.

"I don't know. I think Bob and Mikey are playing with a football mainly trying to hit each other in the face." I laughed. So like them.

"Sounds good. I'll come out." I sighed holding my arms up over my head stretching. Emma skipped off to the outside nearly breaking her ankle while getting down the stairs. I merely laughed going out with a bit more grace.

Just as Emma said Mikey and Bob were trying to hit each other in the face. Gerard and Ray were laughing at them from the sidelines and Sarah was talking with Haley laughing her head off over something.

"Hey bitches!" I exclaimed holding out my arms for a hug which Haley and Sarah gave me.

"Took you long enough to come outside." Sarah joked fixing her sunglasses.

"I was doing stuff all right." I said.

Frank out of nowhere came and pounced on top of Bob knocking him down to the ground. The two of them wrestled around until Bob was sitting on top of Frank who was frantically squirming beneath him trying to free himself.

Why was I being reminded of Sarah at that moment. Well, there was that time Emma sat on her, and that other time I did it, and then there was a time Haley did it too. We all have kinda done it, and always use the excuse of how we just can't see her just to poke fun at her short stature.

"Bob get off of me!!" Frank begged kicking his legs at an attempt to try and free himself.

"No way Frodo Baggins." Bob laughed wiggling his butt on top of him.

"Ah! Butt germs!!" Frank cried trying once again, still failing miserably, to free himself. All of us were laughing pretty hard.

"I'm adorable!" Frank cried out his limbs falling limp at his sides in defeat.

"All right, but just cause you're my wittle shortie." Bob cooed pinching his cheek. As soon as Frank was freed he popped his back.

"You are a dick." He said simply. He laughed as Frank dusted the dirt off of his pants.

"Well, you were the one who was dumb enough to jump on me my little friend." Frank gave him a glare as he patted him on top of the head as if he were rewarding a dog for a trick.

"Sarah it seems Frank knows your pain." Emma whispered to Sarah.

"I guess so." She replied.

*

Now we were on the road again heading down to the hotel we would be staying in since our first show would be in Nadia, Emma, and mine's home state of Kansas. It had been awhile since I've been back and maybe I could go and visit mom and dad.

The time was around 8 at night and none of us were even having sleep on our minds. Right now I was having the thought of how I really had to pee and that the stupid toilets had to break down.

Getting up out of Frank's embrace I headed down to the bus driver telling him to make a stop.

I was begging Haley, Emma, or Nadia to come with me since I don't want to go out into the woods all by myself. What if some maniac tried to like kill me or something?

"It's not like you have to hold my hand!"

"Why can't you go by yourself?" Nadia asked turning the page of the book she was reading.

"Because it's dark and in the woods."

"Sarah it will not kill you to go out by yourself." Emma said from behind the curtains of Gerard's bunk.

"But what if like Jason is hiding in the woods?" Gerard laughed.

"I doubt he'll be there."

"He could be!" By now I was hoping up and down trying not to piss on myself.

"Fine, Sarah I will go with you." Haley sighed following me outside.

"Thanks you're a doll!"

*

Now I could see why Sarah didn't want to go out by herself. It is pretty creepy being in the dark woods at night. Feels just like a horror movie. All we need is Jason to jump out of the bushes.

"Sarah are you done?" I asked. She stood up from behind the bush.

"Now I am." She said going around the bush to me.

Snap.

"What the hell was that?!" Sarah whispered in a panicked voice.

"Probably like a raccoon or something." I said scratching the back of her head.

Snap.

"Are you sure cause it sounds like it's coming closer." Sarah said my voice cracking in fear.

"Sarah quit be a little fradey cat all right." I demanded.

"Fuck you. I've seen the movies. Once you hear twigs snapping something is going to happen."

"Let's just get back Sarah." My gut was beginning to go into many knots. It was screaming at me that something was there and that Sarah was right.

ROAR!!!!

Sarah and I both stopped dead in our tracks.

"Is it me or did that just sound like... a bear." I stammered. She swallowed hard nodding her head. My heart was going a million miles a minute as we waited for about a few seconds in the silence.

"Okay, let's just get back." Sarah said quickly grabbing my hand.

The bushes made a rustling noise and out came what we had wished wasn't there. A fucking bear! It snarled at us, it's very sharp slightly yellowed teeth protruding through. It looked angry. Very angry.

Both of us screamed taking off in a wild sprint in the direction of the bus. I had no idea if the bear was following behind but I was not about to find out. I know better than to look back cause that gets you fucked. You turn and look back, then you trip breaking your leg, and then you're screwed begging for your life and then die.

The bear let out a mighty roar from behind us making us go even faster.

The bus could be soon through the trees. Sarah grabbed the handle desperately trying to pull it open. I took the moment to turn and the bear was there still growling and still looking ready to eat us.

"OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!!!" I cried slamming my fist on the door. The bear stood up on it's hind legs raising it's paw. At the last second Gerard opened the door and we pushed him down on his back getting inside pulling the door closed.

Sarah ran in the direction of the bus driver screaming at him to drive the bus.

Gerard sat up looking at me like I was insane.

"What the hell?"

"A fucking bear chased us!!" I exclaimed.

"A bear?!" Nadia's eyes bulged and the book fell from her hands onto the floor. Mikey pulled me into a hug rubbing my back. Right now I was fucking hysterical. What would you expect from a person who was just chased by a god damn bear?

Sarah ran back from the driver, by now the bus was moving and the bear was long gone.

Frank pulled her as well into his arms.

"I will remember next time to never pee alone." Bob said aloud.

"It'd be a good idea." Sarah assured.

I pulled away from Mikey.

"But ohmygosh that bear was like HUGE! It was like this big," I stood up putting one hand up in the air to show the height of the bear.

"And then it was RAAAAAAAWR at us." Sarah explained.

"You all sure had a night." Emma joked from Gerard's bunk.

"But at least I can add 'I got my ass chased by a bear' to my list of things I've done." Everyone broke into laughter. This definitely was gonna be something I would remember. It really isn't something you do everyday.


Let's turn back the clock and just love tonight


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There is your precious chapter now go and review bitches. Sorry this was kinda short. My ideas were running as fast. Sorry it took a little while to update. I hope you enjoyed it though in all of it's shortness. The next one will be longer I promise. I've got a really funny idea for it. :P
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