Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Down and Out
Chapter 4
“WILL!” Julia gasped in surprise, pushing Brendon away from her and pulling a blanket off of the back of the couch that she was laying on. A shirtless Brendon tumbled to the floor and threw Julia her bra and shirt that lay a few feet away. It was a week and a half into the tour and William had just burst into the dressing room that belonged to Panic! At the Disco, but was uninhabited sans the couple (the rest of the band was out to lunch). “It’s called knocking before you just burst into a room that doesn’t belong to you.”
“Sorry, I didn’t realize that I would catch you in such a compromising position,” he spat back sarcastically. He stood staring at her in disbelief for a few seconds.
“Do you mind?” she asked, pointing to her blanket-clad torso. He walked out of the door, slamming it loudly behind him and causing Julia to burst into tears.
“What’s wrong, Baby?” Brendon asked her, joining her on the couch again.
“I don’t know. It’s just that coming on this tour seemed like such a good idea at the time, but ever since we left Will’s been mad at me, and I don’t really know why. He’s always moody and sarcastic. Our friendship has never been like this before and I don’t know what’s wrong. I don’t know how to fix it.”
“Did you try asking him what’s wrong?”
“Of course I did, but he always says it’s nothing and walks away from me.” Her tears had stopped now, but she was still sniffling.
“I think you should just sit him down, ask him what’s wrong, tell him you’re concerned about your friendship, and don’t let him walk away.”
She knew he was right. She hadn’t tried as hard as she could to talk to William, and their friendship was incredibly important to her. “You’re right Bren. I’m going to talk to him tonight after the show.”
“There, see? Everything will be fine after that,” he smiled at her and brushed away her tears with his fingertips before leaning in to kiss her again. She smiled into the kiss and leaned back on the couch again, pulling him on top of her once more.
***
Much later that night, after the bands were finished playing and everyone was showered, fed and almost ready to go to sleep, Julia walked up to Will who was sitting in the living room area of the bus with his bandmates.
“Will, can I talk to you in the back of the bus?”
“Yeah, sure Jules,” he followed her to the back of the bus and took a seat on the soft couch as she pulled the curtain closed. “What’s up?”
“Will, I’m sorry about earlier today,” she saw his eyes darken at the mention of the day’s events, “I’m so sorry that I snapped at you, I was just startled.”
“It’s okay. I was rude to you too,” he smiled, “Are we all better now?”
“It wasn’t just that William. Ever since I’ve been on tour with you guys, you’ve barely spoken to me and when you do, it’s always something snotty or sarcastic. I thought you wanted me to be here, but if you don’t then I can go home.”
“Oh God, Jules, I’m sorry. I’ve been acting really stupid. It’s just that… this is going to sound really stupid,” he hesitated for a few seconds before going on, “I’ve been kinda jealous of the bond that you’re forming with Brendon.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I kind of thought of this trip as a way to get closer to each other again, like the way we used to be in high school, but I feel like you don’t want to hang out with me now that you have Brendon.”
“Will, that’s silly, of course I want to hang out with you and get closer to you again. Just because I’ve been,” she cleared her throat pointedly, “getting to know Brendon, doesn’t mean that we can’t still be best friends and hang out. I’m sorry that you thought that.”
“That’s another thing though, I don’t want to see you get hurt again. You remember what I told you about Brendon, right?”
Julia laughed a bit, “I remember, but this isn’t a serious thing that we have. I don’t take it seriously,” she was lying to herself at this point, “We’re just having fun. Don’t worry about me.” William doubted her statements about only having fun, but kept his thoughts to himself and smiled at her. “Let’s just be best friends again,” she said smiling back at him. He didn’t say anything. Instead he pulled her into a huge hug and didn’t let go for a very long time. [A/N: I’m sorry! I know this part is incredibly cheesy!]
***
The sun was unseasonably hot for the April day as Julia, Michael, Sisky and William stepped off of the bus at the gas station. They’re mission was to stock up on as much junk food as they could at the MiniMart. A bell chimed as they opened the double doors, and they each reached for their own little shopping basket. Julia was trying to decide whether she wanted the Harvest Cheddar flavored Sun Chips, or the French Onion when she heard a shriek and ran down to the end of the aisle to see what all of the commotion was about. Two girls, one with black hair and one with bleach blonde, stood at the end of the next aisle over, facing the three guys. “You’re like, The Academy Is!” exclaimed the blonde one.
“We are not only like the Academy Is, we are The Academy Is,” Sisky said bowing down a little bit, “Adam T. Siska, at your service.”
The girls squealed a little bit, making Julia smile, “We are your biggest fans!” said the black-haired one.
“Yeah, can we like, get a picture with you or get your autographs or something?” the blonde one asked.
“Sure,” Michael answered. The guys and girls posed for a picture that Julia took, and then the girls asked the guys to sign their shirts, the black-haired one pulling a sharpie out of her purse with ring-clad fingers decked in midnight blue polish.
“We’ll see you guys tonight at the show,” black-haired girl, whose name, at it turned out, was Jackie said.
“Oh, you’re going?” Will asked.
“Of course! We wouldn’t miss our two favorite bands!” said “Karin-with-an-I“, a.k.a. the blonde girl.
“Yeah, it was a major bummer though,” said Jackie, “We tried to score meet and greet passes but we didn’t win them.” Then she laughed a little, “I guess that doesn’t matter, now that we met you here.”
“Hmm, tried to score meet and greet passes, but you didn’t win them?” Michael pretended to ponder and Julia knew what was coming next, “What about backstage passes? Did you have any luck with those?”
“There wasn’t a contest for those,” Jackie said.
“Shame,” said Michael, digging around in his man purse, “I guess if there’s no contest then you wouldn’t be able to win these.” He pulled out two backstage passes for the concert that night and the girls stared, wide eyed.
“You can’t be serious!” Karin said in awe.
“Serious as a heart attack,” William answered her, smiling his cheesiest rock star smile, “After all, it’s not every day that we meet our ‘biggest fans’ at a gas station.”
After many “thank yous”, “see you laters” and hugs, the guys and Julia paid for their junk food and headed back out to the busses.
“That was sweet of you guys. You just made their lives complete,” Julia pretended to swoon.
Michael laughed, “Well I remembered that I had those passes and no one to give them to, so I figured, what the hell?”
“Do you guys mind if I switch busses for a while?” Julia asked, pointing to the Panic! Bus.
“Why would we care?” asked Sisky, before realizing that the question was aimed at Will.
Will and Julia looked awkwardly at each other for a moment before he playfully pushed her toward the Panic! Bus. “Go! Have fun! We’ll catch up later.”
Julia flashed a toothy smile at him and ran over to the other band’s bus, sprinting up the steps. “Hey guys!” she waved to Spencer and Ryan, Jon must’ve been on the TAI bus, “Do you know where Bren is?”
“Back of the bus, Sweetie,” Ryan said, pointing towards the back.
“Thanks Ry,” she dashed toward the back of the bus, all smiles.
Spencer and Ryan exchanged glances and shook their heads smiling, “Booty call,” Ryan whispered, before they burst into a fit of girlish giggles.
Brendon was typing on his laptop when Julia entered the room at the back of the bus, but when he saw her, he put it to the side and stood up to greet her, “Hey Babe,” he hugged her and pulled her into a kiss.
“It worked!” she said excitedly, breaking from the kiss.
“What worked?” Brendon asked.
“I talked to Will last night. We’re all good now. I’m so happy!”
“That’s great,” he laughed at her excitement, “What was his deal anyway?”
“Oh, it was just stuff between us,” she thought it unwise to spill that the real reason why she and Will weren’t getting along was because of Brendon. “But it’s over now, thanks to your suggestion.” She kissed him deeply and started to back him up to the couch, where she pushed him down and straddled his lap. She could feel his excitement and she knew where this was going to lead. She had been down that path before with Nick, but with Brendon, the furthest they had gotten was making out with their shirts off. “I think we should continue this in your bunk,” Julia whispered in his ear, and he led her down the short corridor to the bottom bunk bed.
***
An hour later the couple still lay on the bottom bunk, the curtains drawn, shutting out all of the light. “I love you, Jules,” Julia had been tracing little circles on his arm, but stopped abruptly upon hearing those words. They weren’t what she was expecting to hear at all.
“Brendon…” she started, but he shushed her.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to say it back. I just feel like I have to tell you, my feelings are so strong.”
“Brendon, I have very strong feelings for you too, but I think it may be a little soon to call it love, Babe.”
He just smiled at her and kissed her nose, “I love you Julia,” he repeated.
***
The show was the best that Panic! At The Disco had played so far. Julia didn’t know what it was, but she knew that they had sounded and looked great tonight. TAI had just finished playing and she rushed through the back corridors of the stage, trying to find the dressing room labeled “Panic!”. After a few minutes she found it and burst into the room. “Great show tonight guys!” she gave Jon, Spencer and Ryan high fives, “Best you’ve ever played.”
She headed to the backmost room of the dressing room. She knew that Brendon was in here, since he wasn’t with the rest of the guys. “Uhh, Julia…” she heard Ryan said in the background, but she blew him off and kept walking towards the door, opening it slowly. The sight she saw was horrific; a figure with short, dark hair had another figure backed up to a makeup table, her legs wrapped around his waist. They were kissing intensely and her ring-clad hands were busy running through his hair, over and over again, the nails on the hand decked in midnight blue nail polish.
“WILL!” Julia gasped in surprise, pushing Brendon away from her and pulling a blanket off of the back of the couch that she was laying on. A shirtless Brendon tumbled to the floor and threw Julia her bra and shirt that lay a few feet away. It was a week and a half into the tour and William had just burst into the dressing room that belonged to Panic! At the Disco, but was uninhabited sans the couple (the rest of the band was out to lunch). “It’s called knocking before you just burst into a room that doesn’t belong to you.”
“Sorry, I didn’t realize that I would catch you in such a compromising position,” he spat back sarcastically. He stood staring at her in disbelief for a few seconds.
“Do you mind?” she asked, pointing to her blanket-clad torso. He walked out of the door, slamming it loudly behind him and causing Julia to burst into tears.
“What’s wrong, Baby?” Brendon asked her, joining her on the couch again.
“I don’t know. It’s just that coming on this tour seemed like such a good idea at the time, but ever since we left Will’s been mad at me, and I don’t really know why. He’s always moody and sarcastic. Our friendship has never been like this before and I don’t know what’s wrong. I don’t know how to fix it.”
“Did you try asking him what’s wrong?”
“Of course I did, but he always says it’s nothing and walks away from me.” Her tears had stopped now, but she was still sniffling.
“I think you should just sit him down, ask him what’s wrong, tell him you’re concerned about your friendship, and don’t let him walk away.”
She knew he was right. She hadn’t tried as hard as she could to talk to William, and their friendship was incredibly important to her. “You’re right Bren. I’m going to talk to him tonight after the show.”
“There, see? Everything will be fine after that,” he smiled at her and brushed away her tears with his fingertips before leaning in to kiss her again. She smiled into the kiss and leaned back on the couch again, pulling him on top of her once more.
***
Much later that night, after the bands were finished playing and everyone was showered, fed and almost ready to go to sleep, Julia walked up to Will who was sitting in the living room area of the bus with his bandmates.
“Will, can I talk to you in the back of the bus?”
“Yeah, sure Jules,” he followed her to the back of the bus and took a seat on the soft couch as she pulled the curtain closed. “What’s up?”
“Will, I’m sorry about earlier today,” she saw his eyes darken at the mention of the day’s events, “I’m so sorry that I snapped at you, I was just startled.”
“It’s okay. I was rude to you too,” he smiled, “Are we all better now?”
“It wasn’t just that William. Ever since I’ve been on tour with you guys, you’ve barely spoken to me and when you do, it’s always something snotty or sarcastic. I thought you wanted me to be here, but if you don’t then I can go home.”
“Oh God, Jules, I’m sorry. I’ve been acting really stupid. It’s just that… this is going to sound really stupid,” he hesitated for a few seconds before going on, “I’ve been kinda jealous of the bond that you’re forming with Brendon.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I kind of thought of this trip as a way to get closer to each other again, like the way we used to be in high school, but I feel like you don’t want to hang out with me now that you have Brendon.”
“Will, that’s silly, of course I want to hang out with you and get closer to you again. Just because I’ve been,” she cleared her throat pointedly, “getting to know Brendon, doesn’t mean that we can’t still be best friends and hang out. I’m sorry that you thought that.”
“That’s another thing though, I don’t want to see you get hurt again. You remember what I told you about Brendon, right?”
Julia laughed a bit, “I remember, but this isn’t a serious thing that we have. I don’t take it seriously,” she was lying to herself at this point, “We’re just having fun. Don’t worry about me.” William doubted her statements about only having fun, but kept his thoughts to himself and smiled at her. “Let’s just be best friends again,” she said smiling back at him. He didn’t say anything. Instead he pulled her into a huge hug and didn’t let go for a very long time. [A/N: I’m sorry! I know this part is incredibly cheesy!]
***
The sun was unseasonably hot for the April day as Julia, Michael, Sisky and William stepped off of the bus at the gas station. They’re mission was to stock up on as much junk food as they could at the MiniMart. A bell chimed as they opened the double doors, and they each reached for their own little shopping basket. Julia was trying to decide whether she wanted the Harvest Cheddar flavored Sun Chips, or the French Onion when she heard a shriek and ran down to the end of the aisle to see what all of the commotion was about. Two girls, one with black hair and one with bleach blonde, stood at the end of the next aisle over, facing the three guys. “You’re like, The Academy Is!” exclaimed the blonde one.
“We are not only like the Academy Is, we are The Academy Is,” Sisky said bowing down a little bit, “Adam T. Siska, at your service.”
The girls squealed a little bit, making Julia smile, “We are your biggest fans!” said the black-haired one.
“Yeah, can we like, get a picture with you or get your autographs or something?” the blonde one asked.
“Sure,” Michael answered. The guys and girls posed for a picture that Julia took, and then the girls asked the guys to sign their shirts, the black-haired one pulling a sharpie out of her purse with ring-clad fingers decked in midnight blue polish.
“We’ll see you guys tonight at the show,” black-haired girl, whose name, at it turned out, was Jackie said.
“Oh, you’re going?” Will asked.
“Of course! We wouldn’t miss our two favorite bands!” said “Karin-with-an-I“, a.k.a. the blonde girl.
“Yeah, it was a major bummer though,” said Jackie, “We tried to score meet and greet passes but we didn’t win them.” Then she laughed a little, “I guess that doesn’t matter, now that we met you here.”
“Hmm, tried to score meet and greet passes, but you didn’t win them?” Michael pretended to ponder and Julia knew what was coming next, “What about backstage passes? Did you have any luck with those?”
“There wasn’t a contest for those,” Jackie said.
“Shame,” said Michael, digging around in his man purse, “I guess if there’s no contest then you wouldn’t be able to win these.” He pulled out two backstage passes for the concert that night and the girls stared, wide eyed.
“You can’t be serious!” Karin said in awe.
“Serious as a heart attack,” William answered her, smiling his cheesiest rock star smile, “After all, it’s not every day that we meet our ‘biggest fans’ at a gas station.”
After many “thank yous”, “see you laters” and hugs, the guys and Julia paid for their junk food and headed back out to the busses.
“That was sweet of you guys. You just made their lives complete,” Julia pretended to swoon.
Michael laughed, “Well I remembered that I had those passes and no one to give them to, so I figured, what the hell?”
“Do you guys mind if I switch busses for a while?” Julia asked, pointing to the Panic! Bus.
“Why would we care?” asked Sisky, before realizing that the question was aimed at Will.
Will and Julia looked awkwardly at each other for a moment before he playfully pushed her toward the Panic! Bus. “Go! Have fun! We’ll catch up later.”
Julia flashed a toothy smile at him and ran over to the other band’s bus, sprinting up the steps. “Hey guys!” she waved to Spencer and Ryan, Jon must’ve been on the TAI bus, “Do you know where Bren is?”
“Back of the bus, Sweetie,” Ryan said, pointing towards the back.
“Thanks Ry,” she dashed toward the back of the bus, all smiles.
Spencer and Ryan exchanged glances and shook their heads smiling, “Booty call,” Ryan whispered, before they burst into a fit of girlish giggles.
Brendon was typing on his laptop when Julia entered the room at the back of the bus, but when he saw her, he put it to the side and stood up to greet her, “Hey Babe,” he hugged her and pulled her into a kiss.
“It worked!” she said excitedly, breaking from the kiss.
“What worked?” Brendon asked.
“I talked to Will last night. We’re all good now. I’m so happy!”
“That’s great,” he laughed at her excitement, “What was his deal anyway?”
“Oh, it was just stuff between us,” she thought it unwise to spill that the real reason why she and Will weren’t getting along was because of Brendon. “But it’s over now, thanks to your suggestion.” She kissed him deeply and started to back him up to the couch, where she pushed him down and straddled his lap. She could feel his excitement and she knew where this was going to lead. She had been down that path before with Nick, but with Brendon, the furthest they had gotten was making out with their shirts off. “I think we should continue this in your bunk,” Julia whispered in his ear, and he led her down the short corridor to the bottom bunk bed.
***
An hour later the couple still lay on the bottom bunk, the curtains drawn, shutting out all of the light. “I love you, Jules,” Julia had been tracing little circles on his arm, but stopped abruptly upon hearing those words. They weren’t what she was expecting to hear at all.
“Brendon…” she started, but he shushed her.
“It’s okay, you don’t have to say it back. I just feel like I have to tell you, my feelings are so strong.”
“Brendon, I have very strong feelings for you too, but I think it may be a little soon to call it love, Babe.”
He just smiled at her and kissed her nose, “I love you Julia,” he repeated.
***
The show was the best that Panic! At The Disco had played so far. Julia didn’t know what it was, but she knew that they had sounded and looked great tonight. TAI had just finished playing and she rushed through the back corridors of the stage, trying to find the dressing room labeled “Panic!”. After a few minutes she found it and burst into the room. “Great show tonight guys!” she gave Jon, Spencer and Ryan high fives, “Best you’ve ever played.”
She headed to the backmost room of the dressing room. She knew that Brendon was in here, since he wasn’t with the rest of the guys. “Uhh, Julia…” she heard Ryan said in the background, but she blew him off and kept walking towards the door, opening it slowly. The sight she saw was horrific; a figure with short, dark hair had another figure backed up to a makeup table, her legs wrapped around his waist. They were kissing intensely and her ring-clad hands were busy running through his hair, over and over again, the nails on the hand decked in midnight blue nail polish.
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