Categories > Books > Harry Potter > The Real Epilogue
Together Again
3 reviewsThere was much more to 'The Epilogue' than was shown in Book 7. In this chapter, Hermione returns to Harry.
5Insightful
Reviews
The Real Epilogue
(#) NAPPA 2007-08-26
This chapter wasn't really upto your usual standard. Usually, your chapters are very well structured, and I am hard pressed to find anything at all that might be wrong, but this chapter had a lot of things off on it.
The way the chapter started - the letters without any preceding text and context seemed out of place. It also gave a rather haphazard start compared to all your other chapters before in other stories.
The conversation between winky and Hermione was very good, but it seemed that there was gaps in the conversation between them. Mostly descriptive parts of it. So the panic that winky felt, and Hermione's confusion seemed out of place somewhat.
The conversation between Harry and Hermione also seemed odd in places. I really think the very frank way Hermione mentions Harry taking her Anal cherry seemed forced/casual. Unless it was intended to show in this fic that you're intending for them to not get deeply involved, but still far more than any possible R/Hr. I keep thinking that the two of them would have been a little more banterish in their talk - using more subtler words.
I did like the room of requirements bit - it seemed quite good. If I had to complain there - it seemed more rushed.
I hope my critique isn't too unfair. But this chapter seemed like you were rushing in places. If it's any indication though, I check this site every day just in the off chance I see your writing come up before it hits the yahoo group notices.The Real Epilogue
(#) UdderPD 2007-08-26
The whole thing seems rushed, however all of the characters seem right.
TTFN UdderPDThe Real Epilogue
(#) Cateagle 2007-08-26
I love how Hermione's situation and feelings reinforce her bond with Harry. I suspect Ron's going to be rather out of luck on this count and Ginny's going to find herself at leaset #2 in Harry's regard, though I can see Luna joining Harry & Hermione and Ginny becoming a third without as much consideration as she craves (I suspect Molly may end up cursing Dumbles even worse than Luna did).
It should be interesting to see how things work out with the Ministry, esp. since Harry does have that level of power at the moment.
I suspect both Harry & Hermione are going to be rather put out with Percy and Bill for not telling them about the bonding. I suspect there's going to be some very awkward moments for the lot of them before things are put right.The Real Epilogue
(#) Prince_Charon 2007-08-26
Very interesting. I wonder if Ron can sincerely apologise. I would like to think that Ginny could, but maybe not. I wonder what kind of excuses they'll use.
Thank you for updating.
More soon, please.The Real Epilogue
(#) FenrisWolf 2007-08-27
I'm always happy to read any of your work, and while I can see some of the points Nappa made in his review, part of it is that this chapter is quite a bit different from the ususal style of your work. A lot of your writing is weighted heavily towards the narrative as opposed to dialog, while this chapter was almost exclusively dialog with little narrative to bridge the sections.
I also found the very frank description about sex on Hermione's part jarring, especially as blunt as Hermione was being, but part of that was because I just finished trying to slog through a story called 'Harry's Seraglio', where Harry endsup with a dozen slaves, all of whom just love anal and scatological sex, including Hermione. Blech. I have no problems with a sexully adventurous Hermione (it's always the quiet ones!), but this was a bit over the top.The Real Epilogue
(#) FenrisWolf 2007-08-27
I'm always happy to read any of your work, and while I can see some of the points Nappa made in his review, part of it is that this chapter is quite a bit different from the ususal style of your work. A lot of your writing is weighted heavily towards the narrative as opposed to dialog, while this chapter was almost exclusively dialog with little narrative to bridge the sections.
I also found the very frank description about sex on Hermione's part jarring, especially as blunt as Hermione was being, but part of that was because I just finished trying to slog through a story called 'Harry's Seraglio', where Harry endsup with a dozen slaves, all of whom just love anal and scatological sex, including Hermione. Blech. I have no problems with a sexully adventurous Hermione (it's always the quiet ones!), but this was a bit over the top.The Real Epilogue
(#) FenrisWolf 2007-08-27
I'm always happy to read any of your work, and while I can see some of the points Nappa made in his review, part of it is that this chapter is quite a bit different from the ususal style of your work. A lot of your writing is weighted heavily towards the narrative as opposed to dialog, while this chapter was almost exclusively dialog with little narrative to bridge the sections.
I also found the very frank description about sex on Hermione's part jarring, especially as blunt as Hermione was being, but part of that was because I just finished trying to slog through a story called 'Harry's Seraglio', where Harry endsup with a dozen slaves, all of whom just love anal and scatological sex, including Hermione. Blech. I have no problems with a sexully adventurous Hermione (it's always the quiet ones!), but this was a bit over the top.The Real Epilogue
(#) FenrisWolf 2007-08-27
I'm always happy to read any of your work, and while I can see some of the points Nappa made in his review, part of it is that this chapter is quite a bit different from the ususal style of your work. A lot of your writing is weighted heavily towards the narrative as opposed to dialog, while this chapter was almost exclusively dialog with little narrative to bridge the sections.
I also found the very frank description about sex on Hermione's part jarring, especially as blunt as Hermione was being, but part of that was because I just finished trying to slog through a story called 'Harry's Seraglio', where Harry endsup with a dozen slaves, all of whom just love anal and scatological sex, including Hermione. Blech. I have no problems with a sexully adventurous Hermione (it's always the quiet ones!), but this was a bit over the top.The Real Epilogue
(#) FenrisWolf 2007-08-27
I'm always happy to read any of your work, and while I can see some of the points Nappa made in his review, part of it is that this chapter is quite a bit different from the ususal style of your work. A lot of your writing is weighted heavily towards the narrative as opposed to dialog, while this chapter was almost exclusively dialog with little narrative to bridge the sections.
I also found the very frank description about sex on Hermione's part jarring, especially as blunt as Hermione was being, but part of that was because I just finished trying to slog through a story called 'Harry's Seraglio', where Harry endsup with a dozen slaves, all of whom just love anal and scatological sex, including Hermione. Blech. I have no problems with a sexully adventurous Hermione (it's always the quiet ones!), but this was a bit over the top.The Real Epilogue
(#) FenrisWolf 2007-08-27
I'm always happy to read any of your work, and while I can see some of the points Nappa made in his review, part of it is that this chapter is quite a bit different from the ususal style of your work. A lot of your writing is weighted heavily towards the narrative as opposed to dialog, while this chapter was almost exclusively dialog with little narrative to bridge the sections.
I also found the very frank description about sex on Hermione's part jarring, especially as blunt as Hermione was being, but part of that was because I just finished trying to slog through a story called 'Harry's Seraglio', where Harry endsup with a dozen slaves, all of whom just love anal and scatological sex, including Hermione. Blech. I have no problems with a sexully adventurous Hermione (it's always the quiet ones!), but this was a bit over the top.
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