Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > You'll Go Out In Style
I was swaying slowly on the spot in someones arms. My eyes were closed but I could feel him, touch him. I was at peace Everything was perfect, but then the music that was playing stopped. There was a dead silence, but I was still in his arms, safe. I knew this feeling of security and I didn't want to loose it. I held onto him tighter, but his grip around me loosened. He was being pulled away.
" Hayley!" he called out. I wanted to open my eyes but I couldn't. I wanted to see his face, be in his arms. I was still holding onto his hand before it disappeared and I was alone.
" You're the only one." my eyes snapped open and a pounding formed in my head. Slowly, my eyes adjusted to the light in the room. But this wasn't my hotel room. The bed was on the opposite end, we didn't have windows on this side, the color was blue, not aqua. I sat up straight ignoring the pounding in my brain. My breathing was becomeing shallow. I felt something stir next to me. I gasped and saw Ryan sit up and rub his eyes. Shit! No...not again. I looked down at my outfit and saw that I was still in my clothes from last night. I heaved a sigh of relief, thank god.
" Morning beautiful." my cheeks burned red for a moment before I smiled at him.
" W-What happened l-last night?" I asked. Ryan raised his brows.
" Oh you don't remember..." he looked at me sadly. I shook my head. " Ya..I knew you were drunk. Alright, I'll tell you. Well..after I went and danced with the bride from last night, you and Brendon started to dance." I nodded my head, this I remembered so far. " After that, you kinda disappeared with him and by the time I found you, the both of you were piss drunk and headed up to your room. I thought maybe something would've happened that you might regret in the morning so I put Brendon to bed then brought you to my room instead. Spencer was already asleep." I nodded my head.
" Why are we sleeping in the same bed?" I asked. He coughed.
" Well..you kinda..assumed I was Brendon and started to make-out with me, but when we got to the bed, you crashed out..." Ryan trailed away, a slightly upset look on his face. I felt horrible, Ryan was extremely sweet, I liked him alot, but not that way. He didn't make me feel the way Josh did or...Brendon.
" Have you thought anything about what I asked you the other day?" I nodded my head and chewed on my lip. I could tell he knew what I was going to say, but I better say it anyway.
" Ryan, you are completely amazing, but I think we're better off as friends." He hung his head and nodded. Then he looked up and smiled.
" I thought maybe that night might've meant something to you, but I guess it was just a booty call right?" I quirked a brow.
" What do you mean?" I asked. His jaw clenched and the smile dropped.
" I was talking to Felicia before I asked you to be my date for the wedding. She told me how you used me to get back at Josh for what he did to you six months ago, but I didn't want to believe it. It seemed so real then, like you meant it. Like you wanted to be there-"
" I did-"
" - like you actually felt something. But now I see who you really are..maybe you should leave.." he was right. Completely and totally right. I did use him, and it felt horrible. But he must feel worse than I do, no matter how hard it is to believe that.
I slowly walked out of the room, swaying slightly. I glanced back at Ryan, he was staring out the window, his face set and his eyes watery. I didn't mean to do this.
____________________________
Once in Brendons' and my room I found him awake and watching tv. He smiled at me and turned his attention back to the screen. I plopped myself down on the couch next to him and threw my head back.
" When do we get out of here?" I asked.
" Not soon enough." he said, his tone bitter. I turned to him.
" What's wrong with you?" he turned off the tv, placed a leg under him and turned to look at me.
" So...who'd you sleep with last night? Ryan? Josh? Heck, Spencer? You know he has a fucking girlfriend Hayley-"
" Brendon, what the hell are you talking about?"
" I may have been drunk last night, but I knew what was going on, you left with Ryan last night..Did you enjoy it? Huh?! Did he make you moan? Scream?" his eyes were bulging sligtly and his neck was turning red. I shook my head at him, slightly scared.
" You think I'm some sort of slut don't you?" he threw his hands up in the air.
" If the tiara fits!" I gaped at him. He couldn't think this. He wasn't supposed to think this.
" You don't know what you're saying Brendon-"
" I know exactly what I'm saying! You slept with Ryan when you were still with Josh?! What the hell is wrong with you? I thought you were a decent girl, and I thought you might have actually like Ryan? Why do you think I never told you I liked you?"
" What?!" I gasped. He rolled his eyes and got up.
" Whatever, it doesn't matter anymore. You're a whore and that's all you'll ever be." my eyes were starting to water. I didn't have to take this shit from him. I stood up and slapped him hard, my eyes watery.
" Fuck you Brendon! I didn't sleep with Ryan last night! I didn't sleep with anyone. You don't understand this! You don't understand anything! You're so fucking narrow minded that you only believe what you tell yourself to believe, you don't even have faith in others. I don't need this." I stomped over to my purse beside my bed. I glanced at Brendon his eyes glassy, his adams apple bobbing.
" I'll get my stuff later." I started to leave, when he took three long strides, grabbed my arm and crashed his lips on me. He had me pinned against the wall, and though the kiss was everything that I needed at that moment, it was from Brendon, and I couldn't handle this. Not now. I pushed him off me with enourmous force I didn't even know I contained. I threw him a disgusted look and ran down the hallway to the elevator.
I rapped on the door for thirty seconds straight before he opened the door. His hair was messy and his shirt looked like he had just put it on.
" Hayley? What are you doing here?"
" I-I need to sleep somewhere Josh."
yay! two mew reviewers
i_heart_cliches:thanx for enjoying the story
Fabnosity:you never know what'll happen, what with my crazy little mind.
and i'm sorry prissynblack for putting bden in this kind of perspective, but it does add some spice to the story.
and yes, ryan probably should burn those ugly scarves numer45user, but they look darn cute on him any way.
thank u! :)
" Hayley!" he called out. I wanted to open my eyes but I couldn't. I wanted to see his face, be in his arms. I was still holding onto his hand before it disappeared and I was alone.
" You're the only one." my eyes snapped open and a pounding formed in my head. Slowly, my eyes adjusted to the light in the room. But this wasn't my hotel room. The bed was on the opposite end, we didn't have windows on this side, the color was blue, not aqua. I sat up straight ignoring the pounding in my brain. My breathing was becomeing shallow. I felt something stir next to me. I gasped and saw Ryan sit up and rub his eyes. Shit! No...not again. I looked down at my outfit and saw that I was still in my clothes from last night. I heaved a sigh of relief, thank god.
" Morning beautiful." my cheeks burned red for a moment before I smiled at him.
" W-What happened l-last night?" I asked. Ryan raised his brows.
" Oh you don't remember..." he looked at me sadly. I shook my head. " Ya..I knew you were drunk. Alright, I'll tell you. Well..after I went and danced with the bride from last night, you and Brendon started to dance." I nodded my head, this I remembered so far. " After that, you kinda disappeared with him and by the time I found you, the both of you were piss drunk and headed up to your room. I thought maybe something would've happened that you might regret in the morning so I put Brendon to bed then brought you to my room instead. Spencer was already asleep." I nodded my head.
" Why are we sleeping in the same bed?" I asked. He coughed.
" Well..you kinda..assumed I was Brendon and started to make-out with me, but when we got to the bed, you crashed out..." Ryan trailed away, a slightly upset look on his face. I felt horrible, Ryan was extremely sweet, I liked him alot, but not that way. He didn't make me feel the way Josh did or...Brendon.
" Have you thought anything about what I asked you the other day?" I nodded my head and chewed on my lip. I could tell he knew what I was going to say, but I better say it anyway.
" Ryan, you are completely amazing, but I think we're better off as friends." He hung his head and nodded. Then he looked up and smiled.
" I thought maybe that night might've meant something to you, but I guess it was just a booty call right?" I quirked a brow.
" What do you mean?" I asked. His jaw clenched and the smile dropped.
" I was talking to Felicia before I asked you to be my date for the wedding. She told me how you used me to get back at Josh for what he did to you six months ago, but I didn't want to believe it. It seemed so real then, like you meant it. Like you wanted to be there-"
" I did-"
" - like you actually felt something. But now I see who you really are..maybe you should leave.." he was right. Completely and totally right. I did use him, and it felt horrible. But he must feel worse than I do, no matter how hard it is to believe that.
I slowly walked out of the room, swaying slightly. I glanced back at Ryan, he was staring out the window, his face set and his eyes watery. I didn't mean to do this.
____________________________
Once in Brendons' and my room I found him awake and watching tv. He smiled at me and turned his attention back to the screen. I plopped myself down on the couch next to him and threw my head back.
" When do we get out of here?" I asked.
" Not soon enough." he said, his tone bitter. I turned to him.
" What's wrong with you?" he turned off the tv, placed a leg under him and turned to look at me.
" So...who'd you sleep with last night? Ryan? Josh? Heck, Spencer? You know he has a fucking girlfriend Hayley-"
" Brendon, what the hell are you talking about?"
" I may have been drunk last night, but I knew what was going on, you left with Ryan last night..Did you enjoy it? Huh?! Did he make you moan? Scream?" his eyes were bulging sligtly and his neck was turning red. I shook my head at him, slightly scared.
" You think I'm some sort of slut don't you?" he threw his hands up in the air.
" If the tiara fits!" I gaped at him. He couldn't think this. He wasn't supposed to think this.
" You don't know what you're saying Brendon-"
" I know exactly what I'm saying! You slept with Ryan when you were still with Josh?! What the hell is wrong with you? I thought you were a decent girl, and I thought you might have actually like Ryan? Why do you think I never told you I liked you?"
" What?!" I gasped. He rolled his eyes and got up.
" Whatever, it doesn't matter anymore. You're a whore and that's all you'll ever be." my eyes were starting to water. I didn't have to take this shit from him. I stood up and slapped him hard, my eyes watery.
" Fuck you Brendon! I didn't sleep with Ryan last night! I didn't sleep with anyone. You don't understand this! You don't understand anything! You're so fucking narrow minded that you only believe what you tell yourself to believe, you don't even have faith in others. I don't need this." I stomped over to my purse beside my bed. I glanced at Brendon his eyes glassy, his adams apple bobbing.
" I'll get my stuff later." I started to leave, when he took three long strides, grabbed my arm and crashed his lips on me. He had me pinned against the wall, and though the kiss was everything that I needed at that moment, it was from Brendon, and I couldn't handle this. Not now. I pushed him off me with enourmous force I didn't even know I contained. I threw him a disgusted look and ran down the hallway to the elevator.
I rapped on the door for thirty seconds straight before he opened the door. His hair was messy and his shirt looked like he had just put it on.
" Hayley? What are you doing here?"
" I-I need to sleep somewhere Josh."
yay! two mew reviewers
i_heart_cliches:thanx for enjoying the story
Fabnosity:you never know what'll happen, what with my crazy little mind.
and i'm sorry prissynblack for putting bden in this kind of perspective, but it does add some spice to the story.
and yes, ryan probably should burn those ugly scarves numer45user, but they look darn cute on him any way.
thank u! :)
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