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Her words seemed to vibrate in my brain as the elevator made its way slowly up. I leaned against it and closed my eyes. Fuck! Fuck everything! Ryan thinks I'm a slut, and Brendon wants me because I am. Josh is a whore himself, he doesn't know what he wants. Gah! I'm threw with this. I'm threw with guys. I'm gunna become lesbian. Ya, that's it. I'll be a lesbian and everything will be fine. We could be like sisters during the day and lovers at night.

The doors clinged open and there stood Brendon. He's so handsome. Ya, the lesbian thing would never work if I knew Brendon was alive.

His eyes widened in semi-shock to see me there in the elevator. I felt like running out, but my plan had been to go to the roof. He hesitated before walking in and letting the doors close, his eyes never leaving me.

" Aren't you gunna choose a floor?" I asked. He nodded his head as if in a daze and guess what he chose. The roof. Whoopie.

The ride up was silent. The hotel was at least seven, eight floors, and we were barely on the fifth. By the time it opened I felt as if I was going to burst since I had held my breath for so long. Brendon had stared at me the whole time, I swear, it was like he was burning a hole in my brain.

He left the elevator first once we reached the roof. It was already early noon and luckily it wasn't scorching hot, but warm. I followed him out of it. There was an awkward moment where I stood near him and he turned around. He looked horribly sad.

" Hayley..I just wanted to say I'm sorry, for earlier. Today has been really crazy.."

" You have no idea." I whispered looking at my shoes. He continued.

" I just, you're the first girl I've felt this way about in a while. I don't know what it is, but you're just so...great. Everytime we're in the same room, you're the only girl I want to stare at, the only girl that just takes my breath away, the only girl-" I glanced up into his eyes and he stopped dead. Slowly, a blush crept onto his cheeks as we continued to stare at each other, my own growing hot as well.

" Something's wrong Hayley..I wish you'd tell me." he said as I moved past him, my back to him. I could feel his eyes still on me, where else would they be.

" Brendon..." he touched my arm and turned me around to face him. We were at least five feet from each other, I was still in my comfort zone. I sighed and everything that had happened today and over the past six months hit me. An enourmous sob escaped my body and I fell into his arms crying. My whole body quaked as he held me, shushing me, but the tears kept flowing.

I had never cried in front of somebody like this. So hard, so full of bottled up emotion. No one ever saw me as weak, I was Hayley Williams. I was the girl who kept strong even in the worst of situations. I wasn't the one crying, I was the one holding the person who cried. I didn't want to feel this way, I didn't want to feel this safe and this comfortable in his arms. Not even Josh had seen me do this before.

After a couple of minutes, I could feel myself settleing down. My head was buried in Brendon's chest and when I pulled away I saw tear stains all over him.

" I'm sorry.." I said hiccuping afterwards. He shook his head and placed some hair behind my ear.

" Don't worry about it." We looked into each others eyes again and I just poured my heart out.

I told him how everything started six months ago. How I had stayed late at the studio to finish this verse that I couldn't get right, and when I did, no one was there to share the glory with me. I had gone out to find Josh at the apartment we were renting together. When I got there, I caught him and Felicia going at it on our couch. I left that night and spent it with Zac and Jeremy. They didn't understand why I was so upset until I said Josh had cheated, but I could never tell Jeremy who it was with.

Josh had confessed and told me he was sorry, that it would never happen again. But it did. I knew what was going on and when I confronted him, telling him it was either me or Felicia, he chose her. Two whole months I went in a complete zombie state until he came to me with flowers and a huge teddy bear. He even wrote a song telling me he was sorry, and that he knew Felicia was never the one. I forgave him and Felicia promising to never tell Jeremy.

" I always knew in the back of my mind that there was still something going on. That lusty little glint that they held in each others eyes reserved for only each other..." Brendon nodded his head.

I continued with how I had planned on getting him back, and the only person I could think of was Ryan. How unattainable he was, and how he was wanted by so many. If I could only get him to fall for me, then everything would come into place. Josh would be hurt, and that's what I wanted. Brendon had looked at me at this point as if I was crazy.

" I know it sounds horrible. I shouldn't have ever done it, but I didn't know how else to get back at him...I just.." I trailed off and continued with my story.

Once I found out about the FBR party to kick off our tour, I knew that was my chance to get Ryan. We talked all night before we decided to get a hotel room together. I had told only Felicia, Zac and Jeremy about the plan. Zac thought I was insane as well as Jeremy. Felicia didn't want me to do it, she knew I would hurt Josh and that was the last thing she wanted.

I then skipped to recent events. How I felt horrible that Ryan thought of me as a slut and a bitch. How I was afraid that Brendon thought that same thing.

" I'd never think that about you. Well...I did, but not anymore. you're a wonderful girl and-" I shushed him. Someone was coming up the elevator. I grabbed Brendons hand and led him around a corner. We both peeked to see who it was.

The two newly weds from last night came out with champagne and two glasses. They giggled and smiled into each others eyes before finding a spot to sit at while they uncorked the bottle and poured themselves their drinks. They whispered into each others ears and kissed every couple of seconds.

I glanced at Brendon teary eyed before looking back at them.

" I wonder what that's like...you know? To just be so in..love.." my voice trailed away as their little pecks became full on make-out sessions. I tore my eyes away and looked out at the view. Brendon grabbed my arm gently making me turn towards him.

" You don't have to wonder anymore.." His face was slowly getting closer, I closed my eyes and our lips pressed together. The moment was so perfect, it was exactly what I needed after this horrible and hectic day.

When we finally pulled apart he brought me into the warmest and most comfortable hug I'd ever had. After a moment he grabbed my shoulders and put me at arms length.

" Let's go to a Wal-Mart." he said as if it was the most logical thing to do at the moment. I snorted, then pushed Brendon further against the wall incase the couple saw us.

" Why?" I asked still giggling. He shrugged.

" I dunno, we could goof around, and maybe meet some decent fans. How about it?" I smiled up at him. He was the greatest guy at the moment to me right now.

" Sure."

At the store we spent most of our time critizing the fact that they hardly had any Paramore cd's and how there were only three Panic! one's left. We played the games they had set up, even the karaoke machine which was loud enough for people at the other end of the store to hear. That was what gave us away the most. Girls and boys crowded us asking for autographs and pictures. I loved it, the whole time Brendon smiled at me. It was as if he knew that this was what I had needed.

After we finally left the store we got back to the hotel, I began to remember how things had ended up that morning.

" Umm...is it safe to say that I'm still your roomy?" I asked. We were standing right outside the door. He smiled widely and leaned in, catching me completely off guard as his tongue started to eagerly explore my mouth. I had just wrapped my arms around his neck to bring him closer when a slow clapping began. Brendon and I jumped apart wiping our lips.

There stood Ryan in the middle of the hallway.

" Congradulations. I'm very happy for you two." he sounded less than happy. " Just so you know Brendon, she's a bitch with the coldest heart and could careless at how many people she hurts. Plus, she's a whore." Brendon started to run towards Ryan, but I grabbed his arm. He stopped instantly and threw death glares at Ryan.

" Don't you ever talk about her like that again." he said so venomously that Ryan seemed to recoil. Wow. Brendon really was great.

Ryan rolled his eyes and continued down the hallway towards the elevator. Brendon seemed really angry. He slid the card through the slot to open the door roughly enough for it to almost tear. Once inside he shuffled over to the bathroom locking the door behind him. I wandered over to my bed and fell on it.

I must have been tired for I dozed off. Thirty minutes later I woke up to find Brendon sitting on his bed staring at me. I sat up straight, caught slightly off guard at being stared at while I slept.

" Brendon.." I said slowly.

" No..no, shh. Go back to sleep. You look so beautiful when you sleep." he got up and sat next to me on my bed. He pushed some hair behind my ear, his hands shaking. He sniffed loudly and leaned in to kiss me. I accepted it until his hand started to travel up my shirt.

" Uh..Brendon. I'm really tired. It's been a long day." he nodded his head swiftly jumped up and sat down on his bed.

I turned on my side, now facing him. I couldn't fall asleep. Instead I watched him fidget and twitch through out the night, his hand going up to rub his nose every couple of minutes.




ooh. things seem to be
spicing up between
Brendon and Hayley...:)
and cheers to my new reviewer
winnie_55
thank u for reading my fanfiction! :D