FicWad

“Ice cream, milady?” Brendon asked with a very fake British accent, but not before he pushed the ice cream cone (with mint ice cream atop the waffle cone) onto the tip of her nose. Alice, who was completely unaware of such a dessert being pushed at her, received a green splotch with brown dots to her nose.

Alice blinked before she cried out, “Urie, you got ice cream on my nose!” The onlookers/witnesses during this crime scene included Brendon’s band. Jon was totally oblivious to the flirtatious banter between the new couple, Spencer looked confused, and Ryan looked sort of thoughtful about the whole deal.

Spencer whispered to Ryan, “Wait, are they together?” Ryan looked at his best friend with incredulity. Then, rolled his eyes. With only an ounce of sarcasm in his voice, Ryan drawled dully, “No…you think?”

Again, Spencer cocked his head to the side before he stroked his chin. Ryan asked, “Well? Do you?” To which Spencer replied with, “I need more celery and peanut butter.”

“Trust Spencer to be just as oblivious as Jon!” Ryan cried as he threw his hands up into the air. Finally, the couple turned around from their quite promiscuous positions on the couch as Alice yelped, “Brendon get OFF of me!…What’s that about celery and peanut butter now?”

Alice followed a happy-go-lucky Spencer into the kitchen whilst Brendon sat down next to Ryan near the table. Ryan looked at Brendon disgustedly before he asked, “Why don’t you do those kinds of stuff elsewhere?…Like um…oh! Your /bedroom/!”

Brendon merely shook his head at his band mate. Suddenly, he burped. Ryan slammed his head onto the table and let out a large groan. Jon, who mistook Ryan’s bang on the table for a knock on the door, then swiveled around in the computer chair to face Ryan and Brendon before he shouted, “WHO’S AT THE DOOR? IF IT’S THOSE MURDEROUS FANGIRLS AGAIN I’M GOING TO LIE AND TELL THEM THAT—“

Alice sauntered back into the living room with her celery sticks and peanut butter. A forlorn-looking Spencer followed her from behind. (Brendon later asked Spencer what was wrong, and Spencer spilled that Alice reached the peanut butter and celery before he did. Brendon commented that that was a silly thing to get depressed about. Spencer just went into a nervous breakdown, so Brendon left while Ryan consoled him.) “Jon, it’s fine,” Alice said in between chewing while she continued on to say, “It’s just my friend.”

Brendon sighed, “Ali, it was Ryan. He hit his head on the table.”

“No, but the doorbell actually rang/.” Alice informed her boyfriend sweetly before she patted his head. Brendon made a face that looked like a two-year-old’s. She made her way to the front door, as a confused Brendon looked at Ryan and mouthed, /She never told me she was inviting a friend! to which Ryan just shrugged and hit his head on the table again.

Jon screamed, “Don’t open the door!” Alice then gave him a weird look, shook her head, and opened the door. There was a rather lean, pretty girl standing there. Brendon was glad: if it were a guy, he was pretty sure he would punch the guy up to smithereens just because he was standing in front of Alice (jealous, much?). Unless the guy was around Zack’s height and weight. Then maybe he’d consider giving Alice up to him…/Ha, kidding./ Brendon told himself jokingly. (Or was he really joking? He got intimidated quite easily…)

Before Alice could hug the girl who was standing in front of her, a head popped out from behind Alice. Alice then had to say, with a sigh, “Hey Diana, this is Jon…behind me…sorry…” Then she pulled Jon out from behind her. Jon looked shy but rather excited to meet someone new.

Brendon shouted from the living room, “Why is she here?!”

Diana glared past Jon (she had just started to shake hands with him) and managed to scream, “Because I love my Alice!”

“Alice, why do you have so many wives?” Brendon complained loudly.

Alice rolled her eyes, and let Diana in before she yelled, “Excuse me, but I’m not the ex-Mormon here!”

“Uhh, honey, you’ve got it all wrong. You can’t really practice polygamy unless you’re a guy Mormon.”

“That was exactly my point, Brendon. Good job.” Alice said sweetly, her voice honey-thick. Brendon cocked his head to the side, but didn’t utter a word. Diana laughed, and commented, “Your boyfriend is a very confused man, Ali.”

“Yeah, no shit,” Alice mumbled to herself. Brendon perked up as he saw Jon come out from the kitchen (who even knew he jetted off to the kitchen?) with a few beers in hand. “Anyone want some?” The man with flip flops asked happily. Alice had to note to herself to bring guests more often. Jon seemed to enjoy guests. Particularly Alice’s friends…

It was Diana’s turn to perk up and say, “Oh, yes! What kind?”

“Heineken.”

“Oh, god, yum. Gimme, gimme.” Diana grinned. After Jon tossed one to her (carefully), Diana made a small impression, “My precious…” And rubbed her beer bottle, although the condensation made her hand get very damp.

Spencer piped up, “Damn, that’s a good impression. Do that again!”

After watching more rounds of Diana acting out scenes from different movies, Ryan whined, “You guys, I’m really hungry.”

Brendon looked at Ryan furtively. Ryan looked back at Brendon. Brendon started to ask, “What, now--?”

But Ryan cut him off and demanded, “Hey, I said I wanted a cheeseburger. And now.”

Brendon frowned. “A cheeseburger? That’s not classy.”

“Who said it had to be classy? I get my pick.”

“What? But this is…!”

“You’re making this so obvious, Urie.”

“Will someone tell me what the hell is going on? Or will I have to find out from your very confusing conversation at the moment? Or will strangling you two to get the answers have to suffice?” Alice asked harshly. Everyone was now listening in on the conversation.
“No, Ali, Ry and I made a bet and I lost it earlier on today so Ryan gets his fucking pick of where he wants to eat.” Brendon seethed between teeth. Ryan just grinned. Brendon stomped off to get his coat and ‘things’.

Before they dashed out the door, Diana asked Alice, “Your boyfriend not only gets his coat when it is approximately 80 degrees Farenheit outside, but needs to grab his ‘things’? To get a cheeseburger?”

*

“I can’t believe the guys insisted upon taking two separate cars!” Alice exclaimed heatedly to Diana as they stopped at a red light. Diana only shrugged half-heartedly. Alice ran a hand through her hair. On the radio, Avril Lavigne warbled, ‘Keep Holding On’, her song that came out…four years ago. Alice still didn’t quite know why it was playing on the radio. And then ‘Thriller’ by Michael Jackson came on next, and Alice felt sickened by all the poor children that have been raped by now by the evil beast. She switched radio channels.

Alice was concentrating on the road when Diana burst out, “How long have you known Brendon?”

Alice blinked. “Uh…” She thought aloud before turning the corner. They were nearly there in…about ten minutes. Another traffic light. God dammit… She continued on to muse aloud, “I don’t know. I think I’ve known him about five years now…I dated him for around a year then didn’t talk to him for four years, and here I am. Dating him again.” Alice chuckled.

When Diana responded saying, “Right. So…basically if you add that up, you guys have been dating for two years…”

“…And what are you trying to point out, Diana dear?” Alice asked playfully.

“Well, nothing, except that…don’t you think it’s time he popped the ques—“

“Look, we’re here!” Alice cut in suddenly, as they swerved into the last parking spot. The boys, who were in the car behind them, honked teasingly before parking into the handicapped spot next to Alice’s car.

When they all walked into the restaurant, Alice scolded the boys for faking the wheelchair sticker on their license plate. Jon laughed, Ryan ignored, and Spencer laughed harder at Alice. Brendon ventured to the bathroom. (But not before winking at Alice and asking if she wanted to ‘join him’, to which Alice responded with a slap on Brendon’s forearm.)

Finally, the six of them managed to occupy a fairly large table at the back of the restaurant. Luckily, though, not too many people were around, which meant they didn’t need to be so incognito as they usually were.

Right before the waitress waltzed on over to take their orders, Brendon started a game.

“Hey, Ali.”

“What now, Brendon?” Alice teased, and elbowed him in the side. Brendon rolled his eyes, and asked, “What d’you say that we play a game?”

Jon’s eyes widened. He raised his hand, and exclaimed, “Oh, oh! A game? Like…like…tic-tac-toe?”

Alice couldn’t see for the life of her what four grown men can benefit from arguing as to which game they should play. (Snakes and Ladders? Tic-tac-toe? Charades? Hangman?)

Eventually, they all decided on the latter: Hangman. The waitress saw Jon raise his hand and therefore swooped in on them to take orders. When everyone was done ordering, Diana and Ryan settled into a comfy conversation about books and their usefulness to society and Spencer drifted off to the bathroom to wash his hands. Jon sided with Brendon to guess the word Alice had picked.

“R?” Brendon asked, scratching his head. Alice shook her head, and drew a head. Brendon smacked his forehead with the palm of his head before he uttered, ‘Dammit!’

Ten minutes into the game, and the only letter the pair of them managed to get was the letter ‘S’. Eight spaces were left, and Alice had already drawn out everything necessary to the human body: legs, head, arms, torso, fingers, toes, x’s for the eyes, nose, lips, eyebrows, ears, and hair. She had just started on the fifth nose hair when—

“Oh my god!” Spencer exclaimed so loudly that Jon nearly fell out of his chair. Everyone asked Spencer what the hell was wrong with him, until he pointed out, “I can’t believe you guys haven’t guessed any vowels yet! If you guess vowels first, you can get rid of a lot of letters…”

So Brendon and Jon took turns saying ‘a’ ‘e’ ‘i’ ‘o’ and ‘u’.

And, as a result, the word (Spongebob) appeared before their very eyes in the next two minutes.

Ryan kept looking at Brendon, even after they received their food and shoveled it down their throats. Brendon made attempts to ‘shush’ Ryan whenever he started the sentence, “So, Brendon, don’t you think it’s time that…”

No-one really noticed the fact that Ryan and Brendon seemed very edgy throughout the rest of lunch, and, to be truthful, no-one really cared.

Jon and Spencer knew, but they wanted to keep it on the down low for Brendon’s sake.

But was it for Alice’s sake too...?


A/N: Wow, I'm really sorry you guys...I felt like I went into hibernation or something! Apparently Junior Year at high school isn't as glamorous as it look(s)(ed)? Yeah...so I hope to post more often now that six weeks has passed since school's started, and I SHOULD be getting into the swing of things. I've missed you all! :D