FicWad

Ello my lovelies! Wow, I handwrote this, that's new XD Anyway, I loved the reviews I got and all of the names rock! Here's the new info:

Emily, 13 -- Cadence, 19
Maria, 14 -- Jessie, 20
Lisa, 14 -- Szophia, 18 (pronounced like Zophia, I know a girl with that name lol it just works perfectly)
Amanda, 13 -- Autumn, 16 (I kept her young)
Sean, 15 -- Sean, 17 (lol, age change ha)

I know the name Cadence wasn't suggestd, there's a story to it. I was in chorus and we learned that 'cadence' means the end. Hidden meaning? Maybe, maybe not. We'll see. But I like it.

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Love sucks. Love really really sucks. I had given in to pleasure and now I'm stuck. That's all I was now, physical pleasure. He had never said an intelligent word to me in the bunk, in the shower, nothing. And I was so eager to swallow his cum... I should have been disgusted with myself. But that look on his face! Those sounds that escape his lips! The expert way he worked his mouth, tongue, and body made me shiver just at the thought! I replayed the memory of Frank screaming my name over and over again. I was bad news for Frank. I should stay away from him..... Sleeping together naked doesn't help the situation. But technically, we've never had sex. And that blowjob.... that was all me. Fuck, I hadn't expected him to join me in the shower. I hadn't even known he was going to be my roommate! How thick are the walls in this hotel?? I buried my head in my hands. We're going to get caught. I'm going to ruin his life. I should have kicked him out of the bunk. I shouldn't have told him I loved him. I shouldn't have kissed him in the morning. I especially shouldn't have kissed him in the morning!

But there's no turning back now.

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I don't love her, I can't love her. Every time I see her I can tell she is messed up. There's something about her that's confused, something in her eyes that pains me everytime I look at her. There's something that makes me want to help. Something that makes me want to be the one to make her happy. I'm not exactly sure how to do that though. Everything we've done so far... I'm not sure if that's what I'm supposed to be doing. Fuck, get me out of this hotel!

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I woke up and looked at Frank, feeling the warmth from him. Then i got disgusted. I don't know where that feeling came from. I shoved away from him, consequently falling off the bed and tears rolled down my face. "Fuck." I muttered and stood up, wiping my eyes. I saw Frank sitting up in bed now and he was looking for a way to get pajamas. I scrambled around to find my back and quickly pulled on whatever was on top. I made a face once I was horribly dressed and pulled my bag into the bathroom, so that I could get on a proper outfit without an audience. I ended up pulling on some baggy pants and a crew neck shirt band shirt, I'm not sure what band though. I really didn't care right now.

"Fucking whore." I heard as I walked out of the bathroom. He gave me a kiss on the lips and a glare filled with venom before he locked himself in the tiled room. I could feel the tears brewing. I grabbed everything and left my keycard, I didn't want to return to this goddamn room. I stormed to the breakfast area of the hotel before finally looking at a clock, it was early. I saw a ball of puff and walked over to Ray, he always was an early riser.

"Hey!" I said, chipper as hell.
"Sleep good?" he asked. I nodded and started piling shit onto my plate.
"Hungry?" he said in disbelief.
"Uh huh." I said and started shovelling it down my throat so that I wouldn't have to talk. "When are we leaving?" I said after drinking quite a bit of coffee.
"Uh, everyone is getting ready to come down. Is Frank up?"
"Yes." I said in a monotone voice. He looked at me, "You seem kinda... mad..." he said, reluctant to bring up the conversation.
"Nope, not at all, just wanna see some friends." I told him in a hurry. I stood up as I saw Frank slowly making his way down, "I'm gonna go call someone." I said. No luck.

"CADENCE!" I heard Frank calling, a fucking smile plastered on his face. "I found something in the room but I'm not sure if it's yours. Can you come check?" Not wanting to seem strange, I had to agree and followed him to the room. I stood with my arms crossed as he unlocked the door and stormed in, but he had grabbed my wrists and started kissing me.

"I HATE YOU!" I yelled. He kissed me again. "WE CAN'T-" he kissed me again. "ALWAYS GET CARRIED AWAY!" I slapped him across the face he kissed me again. I gave a low moan into his mouth as he deepened the kiss. "FUCKING WHY!" I begged to no one as he kissed me. "GODDAMNIT!" I yelled and groped back. He pushed me against the wall. We always get too carried away.

A few minutes later we were breathing hard. I had slipped down the wall and he sat next to me, leaning his head back and hitting it every now and then. "Always get too fucking carried away." I told him. I had warned him. I wanted to yell at him, I wanted to scream and tell him it was his fault.

"It's your fault." I whispered. I had been thinking out loud.
"How?" he asked.
"Shower."
"Bunk." he said in retort.
"That should have been a one time thing. No one invited you into that shower."
"But you liked it."
"But that doesn't mean we should have."
I heard him sigh. "I know." he whispered. He gave me those big puppy dog eyes and my heart melted, but I had to maintain my face. I shook my head, "Why do you have to be so damn cute." I muttered. He laughed at me.
"We're leaving soon, the other guys are eating."
"Good." I muttered and leaned over to kiss him again. He carressed my face and we pulled away.
"Never again." he said and leaned in for another kiss, which I gladly met.
"Fuck you." I said as we kissed again.

I swallowed and stood up so that we couldn't kiss again. "There never was anything, was there?" I asked looking around the room.
"Actually..." he said and lifted up a pair of underwear that I hadn't seen, dangling it off his finger. He raised his eyebrow at me and I cursed under my breath, snatching the panties from his grip. I grumbled all the way downstairs but we became all smiles when the other guys came into view.

"Come on, chow down!" I encouraged the boys. They didn't ask and picked up their pace. By noon, we were at the venue chilling out in the bus.

"So, who's coming?" Gerard asked. He had heard quite a lot about my friends on the phone.
"Um... Autumn and Szophia, Jessie tried to make it but law school kind of has her tied down right now. Probably some other people that like you guys too but I don't know." They all nodded, knowing that with my friends I'll find a way into the pit even though they strongly objected ot it.
"Who else is here?" I asked.
"Taking Back Sunday," Mikey answered, then went back to whatever he was doing.
"Of course." I was bored again. "I'm gonna go find Fred." I said and left the bus.

I wasn't really, although I might pass him anyway. I looked back to make sure the bus was out of view and pulled out a cigarette and a lighter that I had snuck out of one of the boy's bags. Frank's, specifically. Let him suffer.
I took a long drag, getting used to the taste with minimal coughing. It was soothing. I was getting pissed at nothing. Ah, sweet nicotene. I let out a contented sigh.

"You little fucker, where'd you get that!" I jumped at Adam's voice.
"Took it. I'm legal." I told him. He grabbed it out of my hand and snubbed it out.
"HEY!" I protested.
"Don't turn to anything but yourself. Don't you do that shit." his nostrils were flaring a bit, he was mad. I didn't know if I wanted to cry and hug him or come up with some smart as reply. I just looked down, wishing i had taken more than one cigarette.
He sighed, "Why?"
"Wanted to, no big deal."
"Yes big deal!" I let it drop, not really in the mood to argue.
"Do you know a quiet place where a girl can rest for a few hours?" I asked. He made a face but showed me to a private changing room that I could use until the gates opened and the band had to get ready.

I set my phone on vibrate so that I wasn't interrupted and soon I fell asleep on the couch.