Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > How To Save A Life
Hey! I'm super sorry for not updating superfast, like i used to!! I'm really busy with basketbal! Thanks so much for stickin' with me and being patient! I love you all so much! And sorry if this is a sucky chapter! Don't worry, it gets way better from here! Oh, and if you think we are aproaching the end of this story, you are dead wrong. There shall maybe even be a sequel!! (But no promises)
Avenue looked at the man before her, on his knees, a begging and distant look in his eyes. She wanted to say yes… Oh God, she wanted to say yes! But her mouth felt dry and she couldn’t speak…
Say yes! Gerard screamed in his head. He looked so deep into her emerald eyes, trying to find her thoughts, trying to get a hint of her feelings. Baby, he begged with his eyes, say yes. Just say yes.
“I…” Avenue began. She could barely hear herself, maybe because she whispering, or maybe it was because the blood was roaring in her ears and her heart was beating 100 miles an hour. She stared at him, surveyed his need, his want, his suffering. “Gerard…?”
“What is it, angel? Say whatever you need, please!” He said, staring up at her with fear in his hazel eyes, causing them to be darker than usual.
“Nothing else in this world would make me happier but to be your wife!” She exclaimed, a smile breaking out on her face, causing tears to fall from her face. Gerard mimicked her feelings.
“God, I love you!” he said, swooping her into his arms, and pressing her hardly against the bed. He began to kiss her neck, placing his hands through her soft curly hair.
“Gerard,” she giggled, squeezing his thigh. “Baby, you are supposed to place the ring on my finger BEFORE we have sex!”
He pulled back and flashed her his famous smile, the one that always melted her heart. She looked up at him, and saw him glowing. Had he ever looked that before? She couldn’t recall a time.
“What is it, Avey?” Gerard asked, hovering above her gorgeous body, his eyes scanning her stomach her breasts then finally her gentle eyes.
“Why are you marrying me?” she asked softly.
Gerard’s face twisted in shock. “What do you mean, why am I marrying you? Because I love you, why the fuck else! Damn it, Avey! Isn’t that ever good enough for you?” he asked, his voice rising with anger. “Or can it never be enough?” He pulled away from her body, leaving his terribly unsatisfied and longing to be next to hers. He rose from the bed and walked across the room, pulling out a pack of Marlboro reds from his dresser. He removed one from the pack and stuck it into his mouth. He searched for a lighter, but there wasn’t one on the bedside table, like he had hoped. He began rummaging around, looking for one. “Fuck!” he yelled when his search turned up a failure.
“Gerard,” Avenue said, from her position of helplessness on his cotton sheets. “That’s not what I meant! I just didn’t want you to feel like you were obligated to do this! Like, you don’t owe me, for anything, anything at all! You don’t have to stay here with me, if that’s not what you want!”
“What if it is what I want?” he asked, turning in her direction. The lamp cast an orange light on his face, giving him an almost haunting look. “What if I want you, Avenue? What if that is what I want?”
“I don’t know, Gerard! Okay, is that okay? All I want you to be is happy! You look miserable all the time, upset because you can’t help me anymore than you already have! I don’t want to be a burden!”
“Avenue,” he said sternly. He looked down on the tan carpet. A lighter! He reached down and picked it up, lighting his cigarette.
“Love is a burden, that is carried by two.
Love is what I carry for you.
In my heart, in my soul,
You’re what lies,
At the end of this road.”
“Did you write that?” she asked softly.
“For you,” he replied blankly, not facing her anymore. He couldn’t stand to see her.
“Gerard, don’t be angry.”
“How can I not be?” he asked, his eyes facing the small basement window.
“Baby, come back to my arms,” she pleaded, opening her arms for an embrace.
“No, Avey,” he said. “Not tonight. Maybe never again.”
“Gee…” she cried out to him.
“There is a reason I suppose, that ring is not on your finger as we speak. Fate has a way of unfolding, even though it’s not what we want. Good night, Avenue,” Gerard said, taking a puff of his cigarette and turning to go up the steps.
“Gerard, please, don’t go!” She cried. She rolled off the bed and began to use all of her strength to crawl toward him.
“Avenue,” he said, turning back toward her and taking her in his arms again. “Avenue, I’m going to lay you down and you stay there. Okay? Just fucking s stay there.” He returned her to her spot on his bed., laying her down gently. He lingered there a moment, his face forlorn and sad.
“I will be back in a few minuets. I just need to go outside for a moment.”
“Okay,” Avenue said, watching him pull away. “I still want to talk about this.”
“As do I,” Gerard said, walking back to the stairs. “But I need to think about what to say.”
“Okay,” she whispered to herself as Gerard disappeared up the stairs. She waited to hear the door close, and when it did, she winced. She felt the door upstairs not only close, but also the door close in her heart, She felt almost like she couldn’t breathe. She didn’t even bother to wipe the tears building on her cheeks.
“You’re a fuck-up,” she scolded herself. “That’s all you ever will be.”
“You’re a fuck-up,” Gerard whispered to himself as he put on his jacket before stepping out his front door. “That’s all you ever will be.”
Avenue looked at the man before her, on his knees, a begging and distant look in his eyes. She wanted to say yes… Oh God, she wanted to say yes! But her mouth felt dry and she couldn’t speak…
Say yes! Gerard screamed in his head. He looked so deep into her emerald eyes, trying to find her thoughts, trying to get a hint of her feelings. Baby, he begged with his eyes, say yes. Just say yes.
“I…” Avenue began. She could barely hear herself, maybe because she whispering, or maybe it was because the blood was roaring in her ears and her heart was beating 100 miles an hour. She stared at him, surveyed his need, his want, his suffering. “Gerard…?”
“What is it, angel? Say whatever you need, please!” He said, staring up at her with fear in his hazel eyes, causing them to be darker than usual.
“Nothing else in this world would make me happier but to be your wife!” She exclaimed, a smile breaking out on her face, causing tears to fall from her face. Gerard mimicked her feelings.
“God, I love you!” he said, swooping her into his arms, and pressing her hardly against the bed. He began to kiss her neck, placing his hands through her soft curly hair.
“Gerard,” she giggled, squeezing his thigh. “Baby, you are supposed to place the ring on my finger BEFORE we have sex!”
He pulled back and flashed her his famous smile, the one that always melted her heart. She looked up at him, and saw him glowing. Had he ever looked that before? She couldn’t recall a time.
“What is it, Avey?” Gerard asked, hovering above her gorgeous body, his eyes scanning her stomach her breasts then finally her gentle eyes.
“Why are you marrying me?” she asked softly.
Gerard’s face twisted in shock. “What do you mean, why am I marrying you? Because I love you, why the fuck else! Damn it, Avey! Isn’t that ever good enough for you?” he asked, his voice rising with anger. “Or can it never be enough?” He pulled away from her body, leaving his terribly unsatisfied and longing to be next to hers. He rose from the bed and walked across the room, pulling out a pack of Marlboro reds from his dresser. He removed one from the pack and stuck it into his mouth. He searched for a lighter, but there wasn’t one on the bedside table, like he had hoped. He began rummaging around, looking for one. “Fuck!” he yelled when his search turned up a failure.
“Gerard,” Avenue said, from her position of helplessness on his cotton sheets. “That’s not what I meant! I just didn’t want you to feel like you were obligated to do this! Like, you don’t owe me, for anything, anything at all! You don’t have to stay here with me, if that’s not what you want!”
“What if it is what I want?” he asked, turning in her direction. The lamp cast an orange light on his face, giving him an almost haunting look. “What if I want you, Avenue? What if that is what I want?”
“I don’t know, Gerard! Okay, is that okay? All I want you to be is happy! You look miserable all the time, upset because you can’t help me anymore than you already have! I don’t want to be a burden!”
“Avenue,” he said sternly. He looked down on the tan carpet. A lighter! He reached down and picked it up, lighting his cigarette.
“Love is a burden, that is carried by two.
Love is what I carry for you.
In my heart, in my soul,
You’re what lies,
At the end of this road.”
“Did you write that?” she asked softly.
“For you,” he replied blankly, not facing her anymore. He couldn’t stand to see her.
“Gerard, don’t be angry.”
“How can I not be?” he asked, his eyes facing the small basement window.
“Baby, come back to my arms,” she pleaded, opening her arms for an embrace.
“No, Avey,” he said. “Not tonight. Maybe never again.”
“Gee…” she cried out to him.
“There is a reason I suppose, that ring is not on your finger as we speak. Fate has a way of unfolding, even though it’s not what we want. Good night, Avenue,” Gerard said, taking a puff of his cigarette and turning to go up the steps.
“Gerard, please, don’t go!” She cried. She rolled off the bed and began to use all of her strength to crawl toward him.
“Avenue,” he said, turning back toward her and taking her in his arms again. “Avenue, I’m going to lay you down and you stay there. Okay? Just fucking s stay there.” He returned her to her spot on his bed., laying her down gently. He lingered there a moment, his face forlorn and sad.
“I will be back in a few minuets. I just need to go outside for a moment.”
“Okay,” Avenue said, watching him pull away. “I still want to talk about this.”
“As do I,” Gerard said, walking back to the stairs. “But I need to think about what to say.”
“Okay,” she whispered to herself as Gerard disappeared up the stairs. She waited to hear the door close, and when it did, she winced. She felt the door upstairs not only close, but also the door close in her heart, She felt almost like she couldn’t breathe. She didn’t even bother to wipe the tears building on her cheeks.
“You’re a fuck-up,” she scolded herself. “That’s all you ever will be.”
“You’re a fuck-up,” Gerard whispered to himself as he put on his jacket before stepping out his front door. “That’s all you ever will be.”
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