FicWad

“Are you going to hang up on me again?” Gerard asked. He had stayed behind in the van instead of going into the venue like the rest of the band. He knew he and Monica needed to talk.
Monica closed the back door then reached down to pat Frank on the head. “No, I’m sorry about that.”
“It was my fault.” He lit a cigarette trying to calm himself down. All day his mind had been on Monica and what was going on back home. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you.”
Monica walked into the living room and sat down on the sofa. “It’s okay, really.” She felt mentally drained after pouring her heart out to Christa. Leaning back, she kicked off her shoes then pulled her feet up under her. “Why aren’t you getting ready for the concert?”
“Cause I needed to talk to you. Monica, I know you don’t agree with my decision about the full custody but I really think it would be best for Elle. She should be with us.” He looked out the van window watching the raindrops puddle on the ground. “Don’t you want Elle with us?”
She closed her eyes, “We’ve been over this before. Of course I want Elle with us. I love her, Gee. But I know how much she loves her mother and I know in my heart that Liv loves her. I just can’t help but think that Liv is just really having a rough time being a single mom. I think she’s overwhelmed.” She let her mind remember her own past. “When I first became a single mom I was terrified. Suddenly every decision was mine and only mine to make.”
“But your situation wasn’t anything like Liv’s.” He was surprised she would even compare the two. “You were free from years of abuse.”
It saddened her that he didn’t understand, “Yeah I was. Kyle was gone and I was free but don’t you see? I still had two daughters to take care of. There was no one else to make decisions. Everything fell to me. I was scared. Deciding to move to Jersey scared the shit out of me.”
He struggled to understand, “Thank God, you made that decision.” He said softly.
Monica smiled, “Yeah and thank God I met your mom. I don’t know what would have happened to the three of us if I hadn’t.”
Gerard watched the rain and Monica sat staring at the framed photo of her and Gee across the room. Each was lost in thought. Finally Monica broke the silence.
“Gee before when your mom had mentioned getting full custody of Elle you said you didn’t want to take her from her mother.”
“That was before she decided to leave Elle and run off to California.” He said quickly.
“Gee” Monica stopped him. “Maybe she just needs to get away for a while. Maybe she just needs some time to herself. I love Elle with all my heart but I don’t want to take her permanently from her mother. That would be heartless.” She whispered.
Gerard took another drag off his cigarette and leaned back in his seat. “Let’s just see what happens.” He said finally. “We’ll wait and see how long Liv is gone before we make a decision.”
“Thank you.” Monica smiled. “I really think that’s the best thing to do.”

An hour later Monica had just finished folding a load of laundry when Liv and Elle arrived at the front door. She immediately noticed that Elle was carrying a small bag and Liv had sat two larger bags down on the porch. Monica opened the door and helped to move the bags inside the house.
“Elle, are you excited you are gonna stay with us for a while?” Monica asked happily hoping that Elle would have the same emotion.
“Mes appy.” She smiled.
“Well good. Why don’t you take your little bag upstairs? Kelly is hoping that you are gonna stay in her room.”
Elle nodded. “Mes wants to.”
“Okay then. Take that upstairs,” She pointed to the bad Elle held, “and then could you take Frank into the kitchen and get him a doggie treat?” At their feet Frank began to frantically wag his tail. He understood the words ‘doggie treat’ quite well.”
“Otay, Mommyca.”
Both women watched her hop up the steps with Frank on her heels.
Liv bent down and unzipped one of the bags. She withdrew a small wooden box. Standing back up she held it out to Monica. “I’d like you to keep this safe for Elle. It has some things I want her to have when she’s older.”
Monica took the box from her. “It’s locked.” She said in a surprised tone.
Liv took a small key out of her pocket. “Here. I put the lock on it because I don’t want her getting into it now.”
Frowning Monica looked at the box then back to Liv. “Can’t you just give it to her when she’s older?’
“I’m not sure how long I’ll be gone.” She saw Monica’s shocked look then continued. “Look truth of the matter is we were about to be evicted anyway so I just moved our stuff out. Some of it I left with a friend but I didn’t want to chance this getting lost.”
“Oh’ Monica said softly. “Look, Liv. When you come back I’ll help you and Elle find a new place.”
Liv stared at her. She wanted so desperately to hate his woman but it was impossible. “Thanks” she muttered.
Elle came running in from the kitchen. “Mes oozed the back ways.” She explained to her mom.
Liv kneeled down in front of her, “I was wondering how my baby could go up those stairs.” She nodded to the staircase “Then come from the kitchen.” She made it sound like she had been amazed by the feat.
“Mommy eveing?” Elle’s smile suddenly disappeared.
Liv’s smiled faded too. “Mommy’s gotta go, Baby. You be good and do what Monica tells you, okay? Make Mommy proud of her little girl.”
“Don’t want Mommy to doe.” Elle’s faces suddenly clouded over.
Liv drew her into her arms, “Baby, we talked about this. Mommy has to go away for a while. You’re gonna have all kinds of fun staying here.”
Elle nodded, “But mes don’t want mommy to doe.” Tears threatened her eyes.
Monica saw the tears in Liv’s eyes too. “Your mommy will be back.” She said putting her hand on Elle’s shoulder. “But you and me and Kara and Kelly are gonna have lots of fun. I’ll even let you make dinner tonight.”
Elle looked at her slightly distracted. “Mes make dinner?”
“Yep, you can make dinner.” She smiled. She hoped this would keep Elle’s mind off her mother leaving, at least for a bit.
“Now give mommy a kiss.” Liv said softly.
Elle threw her arms around her mothers neck and squeezed her as tightly as she could
“I love you, Baby.” Liv whispered in Elle’s ear. “Mommy loves you more than anything in this world.”
“Mes luvs Mommy.” Elle said kissing Liv’s cheek.
Monica could see that this parting was tearing Liv apart. She was about to say something to Liv when she suddenly stood and turned for the door. Elle started to follow her so Monica moved to her side and took her hand. Together they followed Liv out onto the porch. “Call and let us know how you’re doing” Monica said locking eyes with Liv.
Liv nodded. She knew she needed to get away before she broke down in tears in front of Elle. “One more kiss,” she leaned down and kissed Elle’s cheek. She stood up and spoke to Monica. “Thank you for this.”
“Liv, you come back whenever you’re ready, okay? Don’t worry about Elle, she’ll be just fine.” She swung Elle arm in time with her own, “Won’t you Bug?”
Elle giggled, “Mes good.”
Liv took one last look at Elle then quickly turned to go down the steps. Elle heard Frank whining at the door because he’d been left inside. Monica opened the door for her and she stumbled back inside.
‘Liv” Monica called out She ran down the steps to Liv who was standing at the end of the walkway. “Are you sure you’re all right? I have some money of my own..”
Liv shook her head, “No, I don’t need it.” She tried to control her voice, “But thank you.” Once more her voice quivered, “Thank you for everything.” Monica was shocked when Liv threw her arms around her and gave her a quick hug. She could feel Liv’s body shaking.
“Liv, don’t go. You know you don’t want to leave Elle. I’ll help you, I promise.” She hated to see this happening. As much as she wished Liv wasn’t a part of Gerard’s life she knew this wasn’t right.
Liv stepped back and wiped her eyes. “I have to do this Monica. I can’t stay. Take care of my baby.” She took a step back, “Take care of Gee.” With that she turned and swiftly walked down the sidewalk.