FicWad

I got up relatively easy, all traces of last night were erased with the help of Frank's magic pills, I even burst in song in the shower, avoiding looking down and seeing the scars, why should I hurt myself more then necessarily, another day or two they'll be a mere mark.
Fresh out of the shower, clean and high I barged into the main suite where my folks were wrapping up their room service breakfast, "Good morning!"

"Someone's in a good mood," mom kissed me and I didn't even wince like I usually would.

"Yeah," I grabbed a plate and loaded everything they had on the table, I was so fucking hungry all of the sudden.

"Oh my," mom gulped the remaining of her coffee while looking over at her watch, dangling on her delicate wrist, "I'm already late"

"What?," I swallowed down the huge pancake I stuffed in my mouth a minute ago, "Why? Late where?"

"To the lecture," she got up, wiping her lips carefully with a napkin not to smear her red lipstick.

"Why?," I dumped the fork loudly, "You always leave"

"Honey this is a business trip for me," she stroked my hair apologetically, exchanging looks with dad, "You know that"

"Then why the fuck did you drag us out here?," I exclaimed, jerking away from here, "We don't
see you here, we don''t see you home, we just never fucking see you"

"Baby", she started, looking for help from dad, "You know this is not true"

"Yes it is," I nibbled on another pancake to occupy my mouth.

"We had dinner together just the other night," she sighed heavily.

"Yes! With the Ways! Always with the fucking Ways!," I yelled out, "Do you even remember you're not a Way!"

"Baby," she glanced down at the watch and then looked up at my father, he gave her a little nod, "Let's go shopping tonight, just the two of us, what do you say?"

"You can't fucking buy me," I grumbled resentfully at my plate.

"But I can buy you that new CD you wanted," she winked, tucking the loose hair behind my ear.

"Whatever," I shrugged indifferently.

"Then it's settled," she giggled but then when she was half way up, she slowly sat
back, "Let's make it tomorrow, tonight I can't"

"Figures," I shook my head, smirking, "Just fucking go"

"Viola," dad leaned to touch me.

"She wanted to fucking go, let her," I hissed.

He gave her a reassuring nod and she left quietly after sighing loudly. The moments she left I began sobbing into my hands, I don't even know why, it's not like I particularly wanted her around or missed her but it just felt like she choose him over me and it burned deep in my stomach.

"Oh baby," dad got on his knees in front of me and took my hands between his, "What's really going on?"

"Nothing," I wiped my eyes on my sleeve and attempted to smile, "Everything's fine"

"Come on Viola, what is it? Someone's bothering you at school? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I bit my lip looking in his eyes, "I just wanted to hang with mom"

"You never said anything like that before," he stroked my hand with his thumb, "You gotta understand baby, she loves her job, don't make her choose"

"Why cause you're afraid she'll pick it over us," I blurted without thinking.

Dad looked my face over for a minute before replying, "No, but making her pick one over the other won't make her happy, do you understand?"

I nodded, his words going over my head, echoing.

"So you're ready for some fun?," he stood up, pulling me with him.

I grinned widely and fake, sniffling a little.

We walked into the lobby with dad's arm around my shoulder, after popping another pill and washing my face, her desertion didn't look that horrible, so she has a job so what, she can rot there for all I care as long as I have dad with me.
But the sight of the three people at the reception desk threw me off balance and made me cringe, Mrs Way and her two sons were standing together huddled over some brochure that looked much like the one you can get from the hotel about the hot spots in New York, "We're not going with them, are we?"

Dad scratched his head a little, looking down at the floor, "Mm kinda"

I huffed, scrunching my face at them. They didn't yet spot us, they were too busy working their little Way brains off figuring how to hold the map or the brochure or whatever the fuck it
was, "But if you want we can go just the two of us"

"You know what", I threw my hands in the air, theatrically, "I don't fucking care anymore"

"God Viola," dad sighed, "Is there any point to ask you to watch you language, you sound like a fucking sailor"

I couldn't help but smile and let him wrap his arm around me again, leading me to the dreadful family.

We were greeted as usual by Mrs. Way and Mikey gave me his usual nod, as far as Geeard was concerned I didn't even bother to look at him.
We set out for site seeing around the city, it's not like we visit the empire state building every fucking year or been to the times square 59389 times a month or rode the ferry.
Of course everytime we were in the city we would go to these places and have my dad fake a German accent and ask unsuspecting New Yorkers how to get to the green witch, which left Mikey and Mrs. Way in tears from laughing when he demanded to be shown to the green witch Matilda, and then they wonder why people don't like the New Jersey crowd, cause we act like monkeys in public places that's why!
I forced a little smile to put him at ease since he was trying extra hard to make me happy and tell his best jokes and generally act like an idiot, but after gazillion times I didn't find it funny anymore, I just wanted to be left alone. Neither did Geetard look like he enjoyed the show. We each backed into our own corners and pretended we don't know the crazy German man.
Geetard tried to make contact a few times over the day, once when I accused Mikey of being selfish for eating all the brown M&M's, he told Mikey to give me the rest of the pack but we both told him to mind his own business and carried on bickering about the M&M's, and then there was that time I almost got mobbed by Japanese tourists who wanted to take a picture next to the statue of liberty and a local person, so Geetard tried to explain I say coffee differently but they didn't get the joke...To make a long story short, somewhere in Japan 14 people got a picture of them with a frightened male teenager and the statue of liberty.
And he caught my gaze for a few minutes because I occupied myself with picking my nails.
Eventually I convinced them to go into the nearest mall, figuring dad can't humiliate me there...At least not with the green witch thing.
I needed to get away from them, at least for a while, I felt trapped, it was almost overwhelming, so I slowed down and walked a little behind, then once they were considerably ahead, I bent and pretended to tie my shoe, watching them walk away oblivious to my disappearance. They looked kinda like a family, the parents and the two sons, chatting and laughing, the kinda scene they put in slow motion in the movies along with a happy song, my gut clenched but I had trouble identifying the emotion that sent the signal to the muscles. Was it envy? Maybe hate? I don't know but one thing I knew for certain is that I didn't belong there, at least I felt like I don't, I was the homeless kid that's watching from the sidelines and wishes to have what they have...But in the same time it was funny cause I knew they weren't perfect...first cause each of the adult was in a sinking relationship, and each of them buried a dream or two...Well I know my dad did, he buried a lot of his dreams for us, I wonder how much it'll sting if he ever finds out it was all for nothing, but it wouldn't be from me, I would never crush him, I don't know if it's better to live in a lie but then again I wish I could go back and live in a lie instead of being crushed by my hatred...And Mrs. Way did she buried some of her dreams? probably...I doubt she always dreamed of this grey house wife life she's leading..
But who doesn't bury a dream or two in their life time? We all do, I wanted to be a ballerina before I broke my fucking foot jumping from the second floor.
And Geetard? God knows he isn't perfect...Or normal...
What about Mikey? He's a geek, a nice one and a fun one but a geek all the same.
I straighten and smiled to myself.

I wandered around the gigantic mall for hours, enjoying my solitude, window shopping and watching people, it's funny how people aren't aware when someone's watching them, noticing them, how preoccupied they are with themselves, with their problems and issues, kinda like I was, maybe someone watched me too without me ever noticing and then suddenly a hand clasped my shoulder...