Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The girl all the bad guys want
I straightened up my black tie and looked in the mirror, ready to see that hideous face staring right back at me. God, I was so ugly with my small, pert nose and deathly pale skin. Every time I looked in the mirror I felt a pang of hatred towards myself. Flattening down my long black hair, I swung my jacket on and got a glass out of the cupboard. If I was going to get through my own mothers funeral, I needed some liquor to help me survive. I grabbed the familiar see through bottle and poured it into the glass until the container was half full. I took a big fat sip and winced slightly, the alcohol incinerating my throat. I coughed incoherently, putting a hand over my tiny lips to muffle the sound some more. I heard little footsteps and drank the alcohol quickly before putting the glass in the sink.
“Are you ready?” I asked him, going over to him and straightening his jacket off, he pulled away from me uncomfortably. “The funeral cars outside.” I frowned. “Grandma’s waiting for us so we better get a move on.”
We spent the next few minutes pulling ourselves together in the mirror, making ourselves look acceptably. I looked over at Mikey, he didn’t look well at all. His face was unusually pale, he usually had a tan because we were half Italian and he was even thinner than he used to be.
“You alright?” I asked out of concern. He nodded his head and exited out of the door. I followed him reluctantly, not wanting to face the outside world.
I cringed when the sun hit my eyes. It felt like golden flames were burning to the back of my skull. I turned away.
“Are you ok?” asked a fragile voice. I turned around to see my grandma, Elena Lee Rush, standing there with her arm around Mikey. “Come here.” she indicated with her hand. She hugged both of us tight, She gave great hugs. The kind of hugs that made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. The kind of hugs filled with love and not empty promises. The kind of hugs my mother used to give.
“Right. I think we better go.” she said, straightening her skirt and wiping a stray tear from her eye with a snow white handkerchief. Mikey got into the car first and slid over, then her and then me. The entire journey was awkwardly silent. I felt like a freaking alien having everyone stop and give us sombre looks as we passed them, even some of the neighbourhoods nastiest drug dealers gave a glance of sorrow toward our car. My stomach felt all funny. I’d give anything for this to be a normal day, with me just going to school, getting the shit kicked out of me, coming home, drawing and going to sleep. I envied the kids I saw that were on their way to school, backpacks on their backs and packed lunches in their hands. Most of them had no idea what pain was, they were just kids who hated their lives cause nothing exciting ever happened.
We arrived at the church and I helped my Grandma out of the car. She kissed me on the cheek and we entered the building, the processional music was playing. I wrapped my arm in my Gran’s and my other arm in Mikeys and we walked through the aisle, knowing that everyone was staring at us. I looked up and down the pew’s at peoples faces, some I’d never seen before, some a long time ago and some were more recent. I spotted Crystal sitting near the back, dressed as usual in full black. As I walked further and further up the aisle the faces became more and more familiar. I spotted my mums friend Caroline sitting on the third row. My heart skipped a beat as I looked to her left and saw not only Bob, sitting there, his face full of worry but also Alexis, her face full of some emotion-which one though-I could not see.
We got to the front and sat on the edge of the first row. For the first time in my life I listened to what everyone was saying. It meant a lot to me that all these people cared about my mum enough not only to come to her funeral but also to read something out about her.
Before I knew it was my turn to go up to the front and read something out to the audience. My heart jumped right into my mouth and left a fowl taste on my tongue as I went up to the stand, twisted the microphone and read my mums favourite poem; Daffodils by William Wordsworth.
I grabbed a sandwich from the buffet table-I wasn’t really hungry, I just didn’t want to worry my Grandma. I chewed on the soft white bread and sank my teeth through, into the pink ham. I chewed unnecessarily quick, the speed becoming strangely comforting. I felt a small tap on my shoulder and turned round to see Crystal.
“Hey Gee.” she started. “I just wanted to say, again, how sorry I am for your loss. “she said mechanically.
“Thanks. Did your mum tell you to say that?” I asked, rudely pointing to the small, blonde haired woman she had come with.
“Oh. Actually that’s not my mum, that’s my foster carer. My mums dead.” she said, mournfully.
I nearly choked on my sandwich. “Really?”
“Who’s this?” I heard a bold, sexual voice to the right of me and I twisted my head to see Alexis standing there, as unbelievably beautiful as always in a grey pinstripe jacket, matching pencil skirt and a white blouse with ruffles on it and neck tie as well as killer sharp heels.
“H-hey.” I stuttered, at sudden loss of what to say. “H-how are you?”
“I’m fine Gee.” she said, with a sad look in her eyes. “You must be awful.” she consoled, putting her arm suggestively on my shoulder. “Like I said, who is this?” She asked, yet again, staring at Crystal curiously. “This is Crystal. Mikeys friend.” I said, quickly brushing her off.
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“Are you ready?” I asked him, going over to him and straightening his jacket off, he pulled away from me uncomfortably. “The funeral cars outside.” I frowned. “Grandma’s waiting for us so we better get a move on.”
We spent the next few minutes pulling ourselves together in the mirror, making ourselves look acceptably. I looked over at Mikey, he didn’t look well at all. His face was unusually pale, he usually had a tan because we were half Italian and he was even thinner than he used to be.
“You alright?” I asked out of concern. He nodded his head and exited out of the door. I followed him reluctantly, not wanting to face the outside world.
I cringed when the sun hit my eyes. It felt like golden flames were burning to the back of my skull. I turned away.
“Are you ok?” asked a fragile voice. I turned around to see my grandma, Elena Lee Rush, standing there with her arm around Mikey. “Come here.” she indicated with her hand. She hugged both of us tight, She gave great hugs. The kind of hugs that made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. The kind of hugs filled with love and not empty promises. The kind of hugs my mother used to give.
“Right. I think we better go.” she said, straightening her skirt and wiping a stray tear from her eye with a snow white handkerchief. Mikey got into the car first and slid over, then her and then me. The entire journey was awkwardly silent. I felt like a freaking alien having everyone stop and give us sombre looks as we passed them, even some of the neighbourhoods nastiest drug dealers gave a glance of sorrow toward our car. My stomach felt all funny. I’d give anything for this to be a normal day, with me just going to school, getting the shit kicked out of me, coming home, drawing and going to sleep. I envied the kids I saw that were on their way to school, backpacks on their backs and packed lunches in their hands. Most of them had no idea what pain was, they were just kids who hated their lives cause nothing exciting ever happened.
We arrived at the church and I helped my Grandma out of the car. She kissed me on the cheek and we entered the building, the processional music was playing. I wrapped my arm in my Gran’s and my other arm in Mikeys and we walked through the aisle, knowing that everyone was staring at us. I looked up and down the pew’s at peoples faces, some I’d never seen before, some a long time ago and some were more recent. I spotted Crystal sitting near the back, dressed as usual in full black. As I walked further and further up the aisle the faces became more and more familiar. I spotted my mums friend Caroline sitting on the third row. My heart skipped a beat as I looked to her left and saw not only Bob, sitting there, his face full of worry but also Alexis, her face full of some emotion-which one though-I could not see.
We got to the front and sat on the edge of the first row. For the first time in my life I listened to what everyone was saying. It meant a lot to me that all these people cared about my mum enough not only to come to her funeral but also to read something out about her.
Before I knew it was my turn to go up to the front and read something out to the audience. My heart jumped right into my mouth and left a fowl taste on my tongue as I went up to the stand, twisted the microphone and read my mums favourite poem; Daffodils by William Wordsworth.
I grabbed a sandwich from the buffet table-I wasn’t really hungry, I just didn’t want to worry my Grandma. I chewed on the soft white bread and sank my teeth through, into the pink ham. I chewed unnecessarily quick, the speed becoming strangely comforting. I felt a small tap on my shoulder and turned round to see Crystal.
“Hey Gee.” she started. “I just wanted to say, again, how sorry I am for your loss. “she said mechanically.
“Thanks. Did your mum tell you to say that?” I asked, rudely pointing to the small, blonde haired woman she had come with.
“Oh. Actually that’s not my mum, that’s my foster carer. My mums dead.” she said, mournfully.
I nearly choked on my sandwich. “Really?”
“Who’s this?” I heard a bold, sexual voice to the right of me and I twisted my head to see Alexis standing there, as unbelievably beautiful as always in a grey pinstripe jacket, matching pencil skirt and a white blouse with ruffles on it and neck tie as well as killer sharp heels.
“H-hey.” I stuttered, at sudden loss of what to say. “H-how are you?”
“I’m fine Gee.” she said, with a sad look in her eyes. “You must be awful.” she consoled, putting her arm suggestively on my shoulder. “Like I said, who is this?” She asked, yet again, staring at Crystal curiously. “This is Crystal. Mikeys friend.” I said, quickly brushing her off.
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