Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > I'll Be Here. Ready To Take That Bullet.
Hey there readers! I barely got any views on that last chapter! I can't complain about the reviews though I guess. =P I'll try to post the next chapter tomorrow sometime! If not tomorrow then the next day. =) So please enjoy this next chapter! Oh, also, for the next chapter I'm asking for at least TWO reviews this time! Not ONE but TWO! Next chapter=two reviews! Thanks babies, enjoyyy!
-Finch
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FRANK'S POV:
I probably sat there the whole time before the show. It snapped me out of it when people were randomly running by, telling me I was on in certain amounts of time. Each time I heard someone's voice it was telling me I was one in less and less time. It was really stressing me out. I didn't see who it was that sat down next to me, whoever it was should go away.
"Frank we're on in a couple of m-"
"Shut. Up." Did I just say that? Oh well, it was for the best.
Who was I talking to anyways? I turned to find Mikey. Awh, damn.
"Fine. We're on soon." She said, getting up.
He started to walk away, his hands in his pockets and his back a bit hunched.
"Hey. Sorry Mikes... I'm just a little tense." I attempted to tell him.
"Yeah. It's cool I guess." He kept walking.
Ugh. Why am I such an ass? I don't mean to, I really don't. It just kind of happens I guess. You know like when you say you wont do something because you know how wrong it is, but you end up doing it anyways? And afterwards you wish you could have stopped but at the moment you didn't even make the effort? I do that too often. I'm really just messing things up with everyone. Maybe it wasn't such a big deal to Mikey, maybe he's just a little mad and confused, but I didn't want to loose him too. My feet pick me up and drift me to my guitar, I really should gather myself before going on stage.
I stood backstage with the band, getting ready to go out on stage. We were playing in Portland, Oregon at the Crystal Ballroom. The stage was kind of small, but we admired little cities like this one, we did choose the towns afterall. Everyone was making rucus, waiting for us to come out. As soon as Gerard made his was to the micorphone stand the crowd went wild. The rest of us made our way to our spots. We waited at Gerard opened with some amazing sentance that set the night on fire. I knew it was going to be hard tonight. We were playing I Don't Love You tonight. The fans are going to love it, but I don't know about myself. Did Gerard pick that on purpose? Fuck, he knows me so well. He knows just how to make me feel like shit.
Don't cry.
Don't cry.
Don't cry.
I can't cry on stage tonight. Maybe it wouldn't show through the sweat, but, for the sake of my dignity, I wouldn't cry. It didn't matter if no one else saw the tears, I needed to keep them to myself.
----Nearing The End Of The Show----
We did pretty well tonight. As I expected there were fans raving over Gerard's bruised face, he played it off and made some radical story about it. He was so amazing, he sure did know how to put on a good show. I was hoping that Gerard would stay away from me tonight, I couldn't handle him right now. But... then again I guess I really do wish he would. I longed for his touch, his mouth, his presence, just a little bit.
Finally we were coming to the end of the song. I had no idea whether I was hitting the right notes or not, I was just hoping that I was. The reason I hadn't been able to focus was because the next song was our last song, I Don't Love You. My fingers dreaded hitting the first note of that song. I didn't want to play it, I really didn't.
As soon as the guitar started getting heavy I swear I was crying. The tears flowed slowly down my cheeks, thanks god no one could see. I figured it would be best if I stepped back, some kids in the front might see close enough to tell I was crying. That's when I saw that Gerard was walking over to me, he was my heart beat incredibly fast. His voice was so beautiful, my guitar playing would never be equal to that. Tonight I'm playing for you Gerard. I'm going to play so hard that my fingers bleed from running across the strings. My spine tingled thinking about it. He kept getting closer and closer, whispering into the mic. almost,
"When you go
Would you have the GUTS to say
I don't love you
Like I did
Yester-"
I had to bite my lip and turn around. I couldn't watch Gee anymore. Before I had even taken a step I felt the stage directly behind me pulse. MY head flicked sideways a bit to see Gerard on his knees. He was screaming the song into the microphone. The fans raved over Gee, trying to reach and grab him. Even I had to admit that he was so sexy on the ground, sweating, screaming, singing. It hurt me so bad. I stopped playing. Ray looked at me as he had noticed right away, I just stared at him with tears in my eyes. Ray just kind of scoffed at me, shaking his head, damn, he was mad at me still. My hand reached up to whipe my eyes, a few fangirls saw but thankfully not too many. After gathering myself a bit I continued playing. We finished the song. I didn't glance at Gerard once. What would he have done if I hadn't turned away from him?
----After The Show----
After we played the show we made our way back to the bus. Everyone had been avoiding me, excpet Mikey, but I was still feeling distant from him. I figured it would be best if I just avoided everyone tonight. Maybe I should just avoid everyone forever. Now that I've had some time to think, what kind of band mate hits their vocalist and stays in the band? I should just leave right now. They can find a new guitarist "Easy-peasy pumpkin peasy. Pumpkin pie mother fucker." Oh Gerard. Anyways, it just sounded right for the guitarist to leave after such an incident. It would leak out eventually that it was me anyways.
Then it was settled. Tonight I would leave and find my own way out of this goddamn town. They would never be able to find me.
We're sitting in the bus, everyone's watching TV but I'm just sitting at the table, staring out the heavily tinted window. We're supposed to be playing another show tomorrow, so we're just staying parked here. Huh... I should stop saying we. They. Yeah, it's not We, it's They now. I'm already gone. I wander into the bunkroom, hoping to find a pen and paper. Luckily I find a sticky note and a dull pencil. I write down a note as neatly and as clearly as I can and stick it on my pillow. Hopefully the guys look there.
I make my way out into the main room of the bus. Well, it's not really a room. It's kind of a cramped hallways like place with a couch and a shelf with a TV. I barely make en effort to wave before I step out of the door, they must think I'm just taking a smoke outside. But I'm leaving. I'm leaving forever. Happy now Gerard? Bob? Ray? Mikey? I'm gone, it's better for you guys, it's better for the band I guess. My eyes blur as I walk out of the gravel lot and into the heart of downtown, making my way anywhere. I'm hoping the hood pulled over my head hides my face, I wouldn't want anyone to recognize me. It's pretty late at night so it's not like anyone can see me anyways. I can hear the calm city nightlife around me, every once in a while someone would yell or scream and there was a constant buzz of cars going by. The tears that are now streaming down my face, making it almost impossible to see. I pass some comedy club and I can hear the laughing. It sounds like they're laughing at me. I start running now. I need to get to a store or something, I don't have anymore cigarettes. As I run across the street, all I can see are street lights. Wait, that's not a street light. VROOM! BAM! CRACK! Everything's black. When will they find out I'm gone?
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Woo! So this one wasn't filler-ish. =D something actually happened. Anyways please review! Remember, TWO REVIEWS. Yes, this whole chapter is in Frank's POV, but oh well. The next chapter will barely be in Frank's POV, if it is at all. =) So yeah! Thanks for reading you guys!
-Finch
-Finch
------------------
FRANK'S POV:
I probably sat there the whole time before the show. It snapped me out of it when people were randomly running by, telling me I was on in certain amounts of time. Each time I heard someone's voice it was telling me I was one in less and less time. It was really stressing me out. I didn't see who it was that sat down next to me, whoever it was should go away.
"Frank we're on in a couple of m-"
"Shut. Up." Did I just say that? Oh well, it was for the best.
Who was I talking to anyways? I turned to find Mikey. Awh, damn.
"Fine. We're on soon." She said, getting up.
He started to walk away, his hands in his pockets and his back a bit hunched.
"Hey. Sorry Mikes... I'm just a little tense." I attempted to tell him.
"Yeah. It's cool I guess." He kept walking.
Ugh. Why am I such an ass? I don't mean to, I really don't. It just kind of happens I guess. You know like when you say you wont do something because you know how wrong it is, but you end up doing it anyways? And afterwards you wish you could have stopped but at the moment you didn't even make the effort? I do that too often. I'm really just messing things up with everyone. Maybe it wasn't such a big deal to Mikey, maybe he's just a little mad and confused, but I didn't want to loose him too. My feet pick me up and drift me to my guitar, I really should gather myself before going on stage.
I stood backstage with the band, getting ready to go out on stage. We were playing in Portland, Oregon at the Crystal Ballroom. The stage was kind of small, but we admired little cities like this one, we did choose the towns afterall. Everyone was making rucus, waiting for us to come out. As soon as Gerard made his was to the micorphone stand the crowd went wild. The rest of us made our way to our spots. We waited at Gerard opened with some amazing sentance that set the night on fire. I knew it was going to be hard tonight. We were playing I Don't Love You tonight. The fans are going to love it, but I don't know about myself. Did Gerard pick that on purpose? Fuck, he knows me so well. He knows just how to make me feel like shit.
Don't cry.
Don't cry.
Don't cry.
I can't cry on stage tonight. Maybe it wouldn't show through the sweat, but, for the sake of my dignity, I wouldn't cry. It didn't matter if no one else saw the tears, I needed to keep them to myself.
----Nearing The End Of The Show----
We did pretty well tonight. As I expected there were fans raving over Gerard's bruised face, he played it off and made some radical story about it. He was so amazing, he sure did know how to put on a good show. I was hoping that Gerard would stay away from me tonight, I couldn't handle him right now. But... then again I guess I really do wish he would. I longed for his touch, his mouth, his presence, just a little bit.
Finally we were coming to the end of the song. I had no idea whether I was hitting the right notes or not, I was just hoping that I was. The reason I hadn't been able to focus was because the next song was our last song, I Don't Love You. My fingers dreaded hitting the first note of that song. I didn't want to play it, I really didn't.
As soon as the guitar started getting heavy I swear I was crying. The tears flowed slowly down my cheeks, thanks god no one could see. I figured it would be best if I stepped back, some kids in the front might see close enough to tell I was crying. That's when I saw that Gerard was walking over to me, he was my heart beat incredibly fast. His voice was so beautiful, my guitar playing would never be equal to that. Tonight I'm playing for you Gerard. I'm going to play so hard that my fingers bleed from running across the strings. My spine tingled thinking about it. He kept getting closer and closer, whispering into the mic. almost,
"When you go
Would you have the GUTS to say
I don't love you
Like I did
Yester-"
I had to bite my lip and turn around. I couldn't watch Gee anymore. Before I had even taken a step I felt the stage directly behind me pulse. MY head flicked sideways a bit to see Gerard on his knees. He was screaming the song into the microphone. The fans raved over Gee, trying to reach and grab him. Even I had to admit that he was so sexy on the ground, sweating, screaming, singing. It hurt me so bad. I stopped playing. Ray looked at me as he had noticed right away, I just stared at him with tears in my eyes. Ray just kind of scoffed at me, shaking his head, damn, he was mad at me still. My hand reached up to whipe my eyes, a few fangirls saw but thankfully not too many. After gathering myself a bit I continued playing. We finished the song. I didn't glance at Gerard once. What would he have done if I hadn't turned away from him?
----After The Show----
After we played the show we made our way back to the bus. Everyone had been avoiding me, excpet Mikey, but I was still feeling distant from him. I figured it would be best if I just avoided everyone tonight. Maybe I should just avoid everyone forever. Now that I've had some time to think, what kind of band mate hits their vocalist and stays in the band? I should just leave right now. They can find a new guitarist "Easy-peasy pumpkin peasy. Pumpkin pie mother fucker." Oh Gerard. Anyways, it just sounded right for the guitarist to leave after such an incident. It would leak out eventually that it was me anyways.
Then it was settled. Tonight I would leave and find my own way out of this goddamn town. They would never be able to find me.
We're sitting in the bus, everyone's watching TV but I'm just sitting at the table, staring out the heavily tinted window. We're supposed to be playing another show tomorrow, so we're just staying parked here. Huh... I should stop saying we. They. Yeah, it's not We, it's They now. I'm already gone. I wander into the bunkroom, hoping to find a pen and paper. Luckily I find a sticky note and a dull pencil. I write down a note as neatly and as clearly as I can and stick it on my pillow. Hopefully the guys look there.
I make my way out into the main room of the bus. Well, it's not really a room. It's kind of a cramped hallways like place with a couch and a shelf with a TV. I barely make en effort to wave before I step out of the door, they must think I'm just taking a smoke outside. But I'm leaving. I'm leaving forever. Happy now Gerard? Bob? Ray? Mikey? I'm gone, it's better for you guys, it's better for the band I guess. My eyes blur as I walk out of the gravel lot and into the heart of downtown, making my way anywhere. I'm hoping the hood pulled over my head hides my face, I wouldn't want anyone to recognize me. It's pretty late at night so it's not like anyone can see me anyways. I can hear the calm city nightlife around me, every once in a while someone would yell or scream and there was a constant buzz of cars going by. The tears that are now streaming down my face, making it almost impossible to see. I pass some comedy club and I can hear the laughing. It sounds like they're laughing at me. I start running now. I need to get to a store or something, I don't have anymore cigarettes. As I run across the street, all I can see are street lights. Wait, that's not a street light. VROOM! BAM! CRACK! Everything's black. When will they find out I'm gone?
________
Woo! So this one wasn't filler-ish. =D something actually happened. Anyways please review! Remember, TWO REVIEWS. Yes, this whole chapter is in Frank's POV, but oh well. The next chapter will barely be in Frank's POV, if it is at all. =) So yeah! Thanks for reading you guys!
-Finch
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