FicWad

Like A Knife Part 9

That night, after Patrick left, I retreated to the comfort and isolation of my bedroom. I searched my cluttered desk for my small, black and faded journal. Upon finding it, I rested myself on my bed and pulled out my pen. I opened the small lock and flipped to a fresh, clean page.

Dear Journal,

I want him more than ever. Him as in Ryan, ever as in the history of my life. I want him to be here for me, to kiss me, to console me, to love me. Why can’t life be easy? Maybe it’s just picking on me. Keltie seems to have it pretty easy.

I can’t stand remaining friends with him when I love him more than life itself. I’d take a bullet for that boy; I know I would, because I’d rather kill myself than live without him. I really wish he could understand that.

Really, I’m at a loss of what else to say.

Besides help me.

Lost,
Cammy.

I shut the book and locked it so familiarly, then placed it in my bedside drawer to be safe. I truly wished that life could have spared me, let me have something I wanted, just this once. But I knew things would never be that way, as life would never get simple. It would never give me the glimpse of happiness I longed for deep down in my heart.

The sun finally decided to take a breather for the night, and I decided I would follow in its footsteps. I treaded over my carpet in my ankle socks to my closet, and searched for some decent clothes for bed. I grabbed a pair of plaid sweatpants and a large tee shirt saying, ‘I’m Not Irish, but Kiss Me Anyway’. Sure, it was for Saint Patrick’s day, but I didn’t care. I threw them on my bed and walked downstairs to my bathroom.

Noodle pounced on my moving feet, his child like innocence more adorable than ever. I smiled at him, and continued on until I found my bathroom door and stepped in. I locked the door, grabbed a large, white towel from the cabinet in the corner and turned the water on.

I gladly stripped down and let myself relax a little in the calming hot water. I soaped my hair and rinsed, and soon got out. Wrapping the towel around myself, I slowly opened the door and began to walk out. I stepped through my hallway into the kitchen, through the living room and up the stairs. I opened the door to find someone sitting on my bed, playing with Noodle.

I jumped about three feet into the air at the shock of someone in my own house with no warning. He lifted his face and revealed his huge, brown orbs.

I should have known once I saw the tight jeans.

“Brendon?!” I screeched, still a bit frightened.

“Hey, Cammy,” He answered calmly.

“You know, there’s this thing called knocking before you enter someone’s house. It can be really helpful,” I explained to him, clutching the towel tighter to my body.

“I know what knocking is,” He replied innocently, nodding his head.

“You know I could call the cops on you if I wanted to, right?” I told him, grinning.

“But you wouldn’t do that to me,” He answered bluntly, smiling back.

“You’re right, I wouldn’t. But I would kick you out of my room so I can get dressed,” I agreed, pointing my finger at the open door. “Now go.”

Brendon hesitated, but soon managed to rise from my bed and leave the room. This time, I locked the door just to be safe.

I threw my clothes on, and pulled some socks over my bare feet. I unlocked the door and let my friend back in, and went to my mirror to begin brushing my hair.

“What brings you here at nine o’clock at night?” I asked him, running the brush through my mahogany hair, looking at him through the mirror.

“What brings you here?” He replied, rather immaturely.

“This is my house. Now answer me,” I demanded, giggling.

“Well…Nothing really. I just got lonely at my place,” Brendon answered me, rubbing the back of his head in an embarrassed manner. “I knew I could count on you. Could I stay here tonight?”

I looked at his sad expression and melted. I hated when he put that upon me.

“Fine, you can stay. Just don’t set anything on fire. Promise?” I asked playfully.

“Promise,” He said sweetly, standing up. “But I am going to eat a lot of your food,” He added quickly, walking out of my room and down the stairs.

“Brendon?!” I shouted down the stairs, casting my voice into the kitchen. “There are Capri Suns in the cabinet!” I knew his favorite.

“Thanks, Cams!” He shouted back, clearly overjoyed.

I finally finished brushing my thick hair and joined Brendon in my living room. He was already sitting on the couch, juice in one hand, cookie in the other, watching TV. I laughed and went to make myself a bowl of ice cream in the nearby room.

I grabbed a striped bowl from the cabinets over head and swiftly put the chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream in. Then I grabbed a spoon and took a seat next to Brendon, and it became clear he was watching old Looney Toons reruns. The ever so classic Bugs Bunny was chewing on his carrot that he always had in his hand, and recited the famous quote everybody knew.

“Ehh, what’s up, doc?” I watched him say. Brendon laughed.

“What’s so funny?” I asked him, eating a spoonful of my ice cream.

“It’s just that his carrot never ends. It’s like, he has to eat it all sometime,” He chuckled, taking a bite of his (Or my) cookie that he had found in my kitchen.

“Only you, Brenny,” I laughed with him.

“Cammy?” He asked, looking over at me.

“Yeah?” I replied, curiosity getting the better side of me.

He leaned over and pecked me on the cheek, making my cheeks flush bright red. I looked at him with confused eyes, wondering what it was for.

“Um…?” I asked quietly.

“Your shirt says to kiss you,” He pointed out.

I sighed. For a moment, I thought it was real.