Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Stop & Stare

Chapter 22

by flawedrainbow 2 reviews

read & review! drama

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama,Humor,Romance - Published: 2008-04-23 - Updated: 2008-04-23 - 4309 words - Complete

"Sugarcane in the easy mornin', weathervanes my one and lonely." Ryan sung angelically.
I smiled slightly as I woke up.
Ryan's arms were still around me, and I continued to listen to him sing.
I leaned back into him a little and he stopped singing.
"No, keep going." I sleepily urged, keeping my eyes shut.
Ryan chuckled and kissed my head, "Hello to you too." He said.
"You're a good singer Ry." I said as I opened my eyes and turned over to face him.
He smiled, "Why thankyou." He said.
"Dork." I smiled.
Ryan fake gasped, "That wasn't very nice!" he said jokingly.
"It wasn't meant to be." I replied with a smile.
"You've hurt my feelings." He pouted.
"Awwe, I'm sorry hun. What can I do to make it up to you?" I asked, playing along with whatever he was doing.
He smiled, "I think a kiss will make me feel better." He told me.
"Oh really?" I raised my eyebrows, and kissed him... on the cheek.
He pouted.
"Hey, in my defence, you never told me where." I smiled at him.
He grinned back before leaning in and kissing me tenderly on the lips.
When we parted he licked his lip slightly and smiled, "Better."
I giggled and started to get up but Ryan pulled me back down.
"Nooo, stay here with me. It’s too early anyways!" Ryan said, pulling me closer to him.
"What's the time?" I asked curiously.
"Its only 6am." He replied.
"Damn you and your amazing singing." I muttered.
He chuckled.
He held me close and within 10 minutes, he was sound asleep.
I carefully climbed out of the bed, and pulled on one of his hoodies.
It was large and kept me warm.
After pulling on a pair of shoes, I walked across to the room I was in last night, stepped out of the window and sat on the roof again.
It was freezing, so I wrapped my arms around my knees to keep myself warmer.
I sat there until the sun rose before heading back inside.
I quietly climbed back through the window and walked downstairs to my room.
I walked into my bathroom, turned the shower on before stripping off and getting in.
I washed my hair and myself before I got out and wrapped a big fluffy purple towel around myself.
I walked over to the mirror, grabbed the hairdryer and dried my hair.
It didn't take me very long, so once I was done, I walked out of the bathroom and into my room.
I hurriedly walked into my wardrobe, and got changed into my long track pants and a black fitted shirt.
I pulled my hair into a side pony, and put my glasses on before walking back into my bedroom.
"You look good in purple." Someone stated.
My head quickly darted up and I saw Ryan smiling at me.
My cheeks grew red, "h-how long have you been there for?" I asked.
"Long enough." He smiled.
"Perve." I retorted jokingly.
He stood up and walked over to me, "is today 'hurt Ryan's feelings day?'" he pouted.
"No, you're just weird." I smiled, before skipping out of the room and into the kitchen.
Once in the kitchen, I put on a pot of coffee and started to make myself some toast.
"I smell coffee!" someone exclaimed behind me.
I turned around and saw a half-asleep Jon walking into the kitchen.
"Morning hun, yeah I just put a pot on." I told him.
"Thankyou!" he exclaims, making his way over to the coffee pot and pouring some into a mug.
I laughed a bit, "No problem. Hungry? I'm making toast." I said.
"Yeah, thanks." He smiled.
"Coffee!" somebody shouted excitedly.
Only 1 person I know can ever sound that excited over something small... Brendon.
He quickly ran into the kitchen, and poured himself a mug.
Ryan came walking in a second later and followed Brendon's lead.
"Does everyone want toast?" I asked.
"Yes please." Ryan answered.
"Ooh me too!" Brendon said excitedly, probably a rush from the caffeine or something.
I chuckled, "Alright, gimme a couple of minutes." I said, and proceeded to make the toast.
Once the toast was made, I called in the troops and they put whatever they wanted on it.
I spread peanut butter on mine thickly, before sitting on the stool and eating my toast.
As I looked over at Brendon's toast, I was curious.
"Bren, what's on your toast?" I asked.
"Strawberry jam, whipped cream, marshmallows and chocolate sauce!" he said happily.
"Eew." I said, happily taking a bite from my peanut butter toast.
"You're just jealous." He scoffed, picking up his toast and walking into the living room.
I chuckled, as did Ryan who sat next to me.
We sat in comfortable silence whilst eating.
After I had finished, I heard my phone ringing from my room.
I quickly jumped off of the stool and ran into my bedroom.
I raced over to my bed, grabbed my phone and answered it, "Hello?" I asked slightly breathless into the receiver.
"Where the hell are you?!" somebody yelled.
"Who is this?" I asked confusedly.
"It’s your goddam brother! Now where the hell are you?! Dad said you ran away!" he exclaimed angrily.
"I didn't run away Jack, I left." I told him.
"Why? Why would you just up and leave?" he asked me.
"Are you kidding? Did I not tell you when we were on tour what happened back home?" I asked, my anger building up inside of me.
"I confronted mom & dad and they said that you've been hurting yourself lately." He replied.
I was shocked, "E-excuse me?" I asked in disbelief.
"You heard me! They told me you've been hurting yourself! I can't believe you'd make that kinda crap up! And to think I believed you!" he shouted through the phone.
Tears fell silently down my cheeks.
"Where are you? I'm gonna come and get you, and you're going to apologize to mom & dad and explain why you would say those things." He told me.
"No." I replied, holding back sobs.
"Stevie, tell me where the fuck you are! Mom & dad are worried out of their freaking minds!" he shouted angrily.
"I'm not going back. You can't make me Jack." I told him, before hanging up and letting more tears fall.
I lied down on my bed, and faced the window before sobbing my heart out.
"Stevie?" somebody asked from the door.
"Ry!" they called out, and came into my room.
The bed shifted under the new weight.
"Stevie? Hun, what happened?" Brendon asked concernedly as he rubbed my back in a comforting way.
"Jack... Doesn't... Believe... Me!" I said throughout my sobs.
"What do you mean sweetie?" he asked softly.
I turned around and faced him before wiping my tear stained cheeks, "He thinks I made everything up. Mum and dad told him that I hurt myself, that they have nothing to do with it." I said before wiping some more stray tears.
He pulled me closely and hugged me tightly.
"Stevie? What happened babe?" Ryan asked and walked into the room.
Brendon let go of me and got up and Ryan took his place.
He quickly took me into his arms and rocked me back and forth to calm me down.
"Jack doesn't believe me Ry. Mum & dad told him I hurt myself." I told him, tears subsiding.
"They what?! Oh honey." He cooed, hugging me closely.
Just having Ryan hold me calmed me down, "Thanks Ry." I said quietly, knowing I was about to fall asleep.
"For what babe?" he asked.
"Being you." I replied, and I was out.

[Ryan's POV]
"Being you." She replied, before her breathing became slower and her eyes closed.
She was asleep.
I kissed her on the head gently before carefully getting up, and leaving her room.
I walked into the living room and sat next to Brendon.
"Is she ok man?" he asked concernedly.
"I-I don't know. Jack's a fucking douchebag!" I said angrily.
"Calm down Ry, this won't help will it?" Brendon asked rhetorically.
I sighed, "You're right. Sorry. But how do I help?" I asked.
"Maybe you should call Will, he knows Jack pretty well." Brendon suggested.
"Yeah." I nodded, and fished my phone out of my pocket.
I dialled the number, and got up off the couch.
"Hello?" William asked from the other end of the line.
"Hey Will." I replied.
"Hey Ry, what's up?" he asked happily.
"I need some help actually." I told him.
"Why? What's wrong?" he asked worriedly.
I filled him in with what happened and he fell silent.
"You're kidding?! He said that to her? I fucking saw it! His beloved daddy hit me!" he exclaimed.
"I know!" I replied, "what can I do Will?"
"I dunno man. Look, me and Chislett will talk to him." He told me.
"Ok. Thanks Will." I replied gratefully.
"No probs man, I gotta get going. Call me if you need to." He said.
"Thanks again mate catchya!" I said before hanging up.
I walked over to Stevie's room and peered in, she was still sleeping so I left her be and walked back over to Bren.
"How'd it go?" he asked.
"Will and Michael are gonna go and talk to Jack." I explained.
Brendon nodded.
A second later the distinct sound of 'Hollaback Boy' was coming from Stevie's room.
I quickly (but quietly) walked over to Stevie's room and opened the door to see her wake up and answer the phone.
"Hey Gabe." She said weakly.
[End of Ryan's POV]

"Hey Gabe." I said weakly.
"Hey Princess. What's wrong?" he asked.
"Why would anything be wrong?" I asked back.
"Because whenever you've been crying, your voice is weaker and you sound sleepy. You always feel sleepy after you've cried." He explained.
"Whoa..." I said.
It’s amazing how much that man can store in his brain!
"Yeah, so are you gonna fess up?" he asked.
I sighed, "Can I sign 'Saporta' on all legal documentation because I hate my family!" I exclaimed.
"It'd be sweet if you could, but I think it’s against the law. And what's this about hating your family? I understand your parents but what about Jack?" he asked.
"He doesn't believe me." I mumbled.
"What do you mean hun?" he asked, I could hear he was getting mad.
I sighed, "He confronted Mum and dad and they told him I was hurting myself. They said they did nothing, and he believed them." I said, tears stinging my eyes.
"What?! That little fucker! I'll kick his fucking ass!" he exclaimed angrily.
"N-no Gabe! Just d-don't." I stuttered.
"Why Stevie?" he asked.
"You'll get in trouble." I mumbled.
Yes, I did act like a child sometimes, this is just how I act in certain situations.
"Stevie, sweetie. It's gonna be ok." He said comfortingly.
"I don't think it will Gabe. I mean, he doesn't believe me... I hate being like this! Why can't I have a normal family?!" I rhetorically asked.
"I dunno sweetie. I know it sucks but you've got to hang in there ok? You have Ryan now, he'll take care of you. You know he will." He told me.
I sighed, "You're right, I'm sorry." I replied.
"Don't be sorry Princess. It's gonna be ok." He assured me.
"Ok, thanks Gabe. Love you."
"I love you too, call me if you need me. Bye Princess." He said.
"Bye." I replied before hanging up.
There was a knock at my door, "Stevie?" Ryan called, and opened the door.
"Hey." I said to him with a slight smile.
"Hey." He replied, coming over and sitting next to me on the bed.
I laid my head on his shoulder and he snaked his arm around my waist.
"Do you wanna do anything today?" he asked.
"We could go for a walk." I suggested.
"Sounds like a plan gorgeous." He smiled and kissed the top of my head.
I giggled, "Well let’s get going, you can show me around." I said, before getting up and venturing over to my wardrobe.
I pulled on my purple kicks (which you can probably tell by now that I absolutely adore!) and remained in Ryan's oversized hoodie.
When I walked out, Ryan raised his eyebrows, "is that my hoodie?" he asked.
"Maybe." I smiled.
"Well it looks good on you. Shall we depart the premises of this establishment?" he asked, cocking out his elbow for me.
"We shall." I replied, before shoving my phone in my pocket and linking arms with him.
"Where are you two lovebirds off to?" Brendon asked as we walked past him.
"We, my good sir, are going on an expedition. Who knows what lurks outside these walls." I said mysteriously.
"Okay then. Good luck with that Indiana." He said, before sitting on the couch and reading his book.
Me and Ryan both laughed before we opened the door and set off on our walk.

We both walked through the front door 2 hours later laughing.
Its amazing how much Ryan can make me laugh.
When we got inside, Brendon and Jon were talking worriedly.
My face fell, "What's wrong guys?" I asked.
"Spencer's sick, and we don't know what to do." Brendon told me.
"Ok, is he in his room?" I asked.
They both nodded.
I walked away but came back quickly, "Where's his room?" I asked shyly.
Ryan laughed, "Next to mine." He told me, and I raced up the stairs and over to Spencer's room.
I knocked on his door, "Spence? Sweetie it’s me." I said.
I heard someone retching and opened the door.
I walked over to his bathroom and there he was, hunched over the toilet emptying his guts.
I quickly blocked out the smell, and knelt next to him, rubbing his back.
Once he was done, I handed him some toilet paper and a glass of water.
"Thanks." He said weakly.
"No problem hun. But as of right now, I am Nurse Stevie, and I say have a shower and crawl into bed. I'll take care of you." I smiled.
He nodded, and I left his bathroom so he could shower in peace.
I made his bed, and rolled the cover back before running into my room and the living room and grabbing any extra pillows that I could.
"Stevie? What are you doing?" Ryan asked with a laugh.
"I'm trying to make Spence's bed more comfortable. Do you know if Spencer has an iPod?" I asked.
"Yeah, it’s on his nightstand." He answered.
I kissed him on the cheek, "Thanks babe." I said, before going up to Spencer's room and arranging all the pillows.
I quickly raced down to my room and pulled out my iPod dock, and brought it up to Spencer's room.
As I plugged it in, Spencer emerged from the bathroom dressed in his PJ's.
"Climb into bed mister, I grabbed some extra pillows for you." I smiled.
"Thanks Stevie." He smiled back and climbed into bed.
"Do you want to listen to your iPod?" I asked him.
He nodded, "ok then." I said placing his iPod on shuffle to hear 'Bohemian Rhapsody' by Queen came on.
"Alright Spence, what's wrong?" I asked, sitting on the edge of his bed.
"I dunno, my stomach feels like shit and I've got a monster of a headache." He told me.
"Ok then hun, I'll grab you some Panadol and some water kay?" I said, and made my way into the kitchen.
"What's the prognosis doc?" Ryan asked.
"He's got a headache and a sick stomach. I'll give him some Panadol and he should drink some water. He might be dehydrated... But I dunno. It could just be a bug." I explained.
Ryan nodded.
"So uhh, where's the Panadol?" I asked.
"Oh," he walked over to a cupboard and pulled out a small container, "here you go. There's some bottled water in the fridge." He told me.
"Thanks." I said, taking the container, grabbing some bottles of water and a plastic bucket.
I quickly walked back up to Spencer's room and handed him a couple of tablets plus the bottled water.
"I brought a bucket, just in case you can't make it to the bathroom quick enough. Here's a spare bottle of water too." I said, placing the bucket on the bed and the water on the nightstand.
"Thanks, you don't have to do this you know." He said.
I shrugged, "I don't care. This is what friends do. Now do you wanna borrow my laptop and watch a movie or are you gonna try and sleep?" I asked.
"I think I'll try and sleep." He replied.
"Ok then hun, call if you need me. And you can still use my laptop if you want to." I told him, giving him a smile before walking out and closing the door.
I went into the kitchen and began to make chicken noodle soup.
When I was younger, and before my parents hated me, Mum would always make me chicken noodle soup when I had a stomach ache.
It took me a half hour to make the soup.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Ryan asked from behind me.
"I'm making Spence some soup. It helped me when I was sick." I explained.
"Awwe, Nurse Stevie to the rescue." He smiled.
I turned around, "Don't you forget it." I smiled and pecked his lips.
He laughed a bit, and I turned back to the soup.
"Do you have any crackers?" I asked him.
"Umm..." He moved over to the pantry and pulled out a packet of saltines, "yes."
"Thanks." I said, and took the crackers from him.
I pulled down a deep bowel and filled it with soup.
"Here." Ryan said, handing me a tray.
"Thanks hun." I smiled, and set the bowel on it along with the crackers and a spoon.
I carefully walked up the stairs and up to Spencer's room.
I forgot it was shut, but Ryan had followed me.
"Allow me." He smiled before opening the door for me.
"Thanks... Again." I replied, walking into the room and placing the tray carefully on the bed.
Spencer opened his eyes slowly, "Hey. You made me soup!" he said happily.
"With crackers." I added.
"Awwe. Only my Mum would ever do this kinda thing for me. I feel loved!" he said happily.
"I'm guessing you're feeling a bit better." I said.
He nodded, "Yeah, my stomach still feels a bit... iffy, but my headaches not as bad now." He told me.
"Good, do you need anything? I can grab my laptop for you if you want." I offered.
"Only if it’s no trouble, if it is tell me to shut the fuck up." He said.
"Hun, its fine. I offered. I'll be right back." I said, and walked downstairs to my room.
I unplugged my laptop, and brought it back up to Spencer's room, but he was no longer in bed.
Instead, the bathroom door was open and the sound of retching once again could be heard.
I quickly put my laptop on the bed, and raced into the bathroom and rubbed Spencer's back.
Once he was done, I handed him his water which he gurgled before spitting back out.
I helped him up, and led him back over to his bed, pulling the doona back over him.
I grabbed a flannel, ran it under some cold water and wiped his face.
"Better?" I asked.
He nodded.
"Ok, well here's my laptop. What movie do you want to watch? Or you can just muck around on the internet for a while." I said.
"I think I'm gonna try and sleep again, but I'll probably muck around with it later." He replied.
"Ok sweetie, I'll leave you to it." I smiled, before walking back out of the room and yawning.
"Stevie! How is he?" Brendon asked as he walked out of his room.
"He's ok. He's gonna try and sleep now so try and be quiet." I told him.
He nodded, and we both walked downstairs.
"How's my little nurse going?" Ryan asked and placed his hands on my hips.
"I'm ok." I replied, and he kissed me gently on the lips.
"Cease and desist!" Jon cried.
"Shhh! Spence's trying to sleep." I told him and stepped away from Ryan.
"Oops." He said, and sat down next to Bren who had just started up some game on the play station.
"I'm gonna go and hang out in my room for a while." I told Ryan.
"Ok babe, I'll probably come in there soon. Knowing these guys, I'll be bored soon." He smiled.
"Ok." I kissed his lips quickly before darting off to my room.
Once I was in, I quickly shut my door, grabbed my journal from the draw plus a pen, and began writing.
My latest entry was filled with details of Jack's phone call, my mini breakdown and Brendon, Ryan and Gabe's helpful words.
Once I had finished writing, I put my journal back into its draw and sat on my bed staring out the window.
Not even 2 minutes later, there was a knock at my door and Ryan walked in.
"Hey. Bored already?" I joked.
He smiled, and came over to sit behind me on my bed, "No, just missed you." He told me.
"Nawwe, I missed you too! Even though I saw you, what, 10 minutes ago?" I giggled.
"Yeah, but... Grr." He pouted.
"Grr?" I looked back at him confused.
"Yes, Grr." He said once again.
I shrugged, and leaned back into him, still looking out of the window.
Ryan wrapped his arms around my waist.
"I could stay like this all day." Ryan said into my ear.
"That you could, but I can't feel my legs very much anymore and I should check on Spence." I said.
Ryan laughed and got up.
"Help me?" I asked with puppy dog eyes.
He laughed a bit more, but helped me up none the less.
"Imma go check on my patient now." I said, turning towards the door but was pulled back.
"I think I'm coming down with something. I might need a nurse soon." He smirked.
I smiled, "Hmm... I can't have you sick! I'll come back and check on you once I've taken care of Spence." I told him before pecking his lips and walking upstairs to Spencer's room.
I opened his door and saw that he was still sleeping.
I walked over to the tray of food.
The soup was all gone, and some of the crackers had been eaten.
I packed up the mess quietly before heading back downstairs and cleaning up.
Once I had cleaned up, I saw that Jon and Brendon were still playing on the play station so I went over to my room to see if Ryan was still there.
He wasn't there, so I walked upstairs to his room and found him snuggled up in bed.
He must've heard me come in because he sat up and looked at me.
"I told you I think I'm coming down with something." He smiled.
"Well if you're sick, you should be lying down then hey?" I said.
He smiled before lying back down.
I walked over and sat on the edge of the bed before putting my hand against his forehead to check his temperature.
"Hmm, you're not hot-"
"Hey! I'll have you know many people think I'm hot." He defended.
"I know sweetie, I meant your temperature." I finished.
"I knew that." Ryan said quickly.
I laughed.
"So, what seems to be the problem?" I asked, playing along with his game.
"Well, I think I'm suffering withdrawals." He told me confidently.
"Withdrawals hmm? Withdrawals of what?" I asked.
He pulled me close to him, "You." He told me before crashing his lips onto mine.
Ryan skilfully slipped out from under the covers and was hovering over me whilst we were kissing.
Ryan grazed his tongue over my lip, so I parted my lips slightly allowing him entrance.
After a while we broke apart to regain our breath.
"Well... I feel better now." Ryan grinned like a maniac.
"I'm glad." I replied.
He smiled again before kissing me tenderly and sitting on my legs facing me.
"Hey! Now I can't move." I whined.
He smirked, remaining on my legs, and leaning into kiss me.
It reminded me of my dad, the way he pinned me down.
Ryan kissed me, and I freaked out.
"Stop! Please!" I cried, wriggling out from underneath him and running out of the room.
I quickly ran down the stairs, and into my own room, ignoring Ryan calling me back.
I closed my door quickly before locking it and falling to the floor crying.
I rested my face in my hands and continued to sob, trying to forget about my dad and everything he did to me.
I eventually got up and crawled into bed, pulling the doonas all around me and prayed for sleep.

[Ryan's POV]
Still sitting on her legs, I smiled and leant down and kissed her.
She broke away from the kiss and cried, "Stop! Please!" before wriggling out and bolting out of my room.
I ran after her, "Stevie!" I called, but she didn't respond and ran into her room.
I ran down the stairs to try and talk to her, but I heard her door lock.
My heart sank, what happened?
"Ry, what happened? Is Stevie ok?!" he asked worriedly.
"I dunno Bren. One minute we're kissing and having fun, and then she screamed and ran away." I told him.
"What? Why?" he asked himself.
"Bren, I think something else happened in that house."
[End of Ryan's POV]

[a/n oooh drama! read & review! xx]
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