Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Stuttering
"Happy Birthday Jewseph!"
0 reviewsJoe walked around this box some more and just admired it. He couldn't stop laughing. All he wondered was who in the hell got whatever was in this box for him. Suddenly everyone Joe had called was a...
0Unrated
Stuttering 85
We left the house and got into the car. A bit later we pulled up to Joe's.
The moment Joe got the box ½ opened his eyes got huge and he started to laugh. He then picked up his phone and called Pete.
"Peter!" Joe said laughing.
"What's up?" Pete asked.
"Dude. What did you send me for my birthday?"
"I don't...I didn't send you anything."
"Come on bro! Don't lie."
"I'm not lying."
"Dude. There's this huge box sitting in my living room."
"What?"
"Really."
"Well that wasn't me."
"Hmmm." Joe sighed absolutly confused about this big box.
Joe walked around this box some more and just admired it. He couldn't stop laughing. All he wondered was who in the hell got whatever was in this box for him. Suddenly everyone Joe had called was at his place, except for Pete.
"I just wanted to see box." Patrick stated.
"I mean I should be at my house, but Patrick's all like oooh Cali you must come with me. And I'm all like I don't wanna. And he goes Joe's got those matzah's you like...I want the matzah's Joe."
Joe went into the kitchen to get the matzah's and handed them off to me. I sat in my little corner with this box of matzah's and sighed lovingly. It just came to the point where I just ate all the time.
I felt sorrie for Patrick because I've been a d-bag when it came to food. But I swear he didn't understand what was going on with my body.
"How does it go? Yes. 'Well I'm gonna keep on loving you cuz its the only thing I wanna do I don't wanna sleep / I just wanna keep on loving you...' " I sung into the box, "what?"
"Nothing." Joe said laughing.
"What is it?" Andy questioned.
"I don't know. It doesn't want to open."
I then got up because it seemed like it was taking too many boys to open that box. The moment I got up, I looked for a weak spot and cracked my back.
"Say My Name!" I said punching the box with all my might, then walking away with a smile,
"Game, bitches."
The box then collasped on its own accord and I walked back to my box of Kosher cinnamon-sugar matzah's. They were fantastic for being 3 months old if I do say so myself.
Joe rose his eyebrow at me and smiled. There was another box over it and he pulled it off. I started to laugh with the other guys as styrofoam and plastic dividers and packaging eggs came out the box too. When Joe finally got to his gift his blue eyes got huge.
He brought his hand to run it through his curls but he was still shaved clean.
"OH. MY. GOD!" Joe squealed.
I then looked around the corner and my mouth dropped. This must have been what Ginny was talking about sometime last week. Joe was so geeked and then looked at me.
"Calista...?" Joe sighed with this look.
"Happy Birthday Jewseph!" I said laughing.
"You just know me-"
Patrick and Andy then clammoured around the true to life R2-D2 that 'I' had gotten Joe. Gin was gonna be geeked that he got it but not so much if he tossed it out. So I did all I could do to salvage the gift.
Joe turned the R2-D2 around and around. He knew there was something wrong with this. He had mentioned an awesome R2-D2 unit to one other person, and it wasn't me. There was a piece of paper by a red button that said: 'Move Me To A Blank Wall & Hit Play.'
This I didn't know about. When Joe hit play it was a video Genovieve made for him and I knew nothing about.
"Well babe, its maybe somewhere near September and we've been together for 7 or 8 or 9 months....and I'm thinking maybe we should go big-"
"We don't have to watch this..." I said moving towards the R2 unit.
"NO!" Joe yelled, "I wanna see the rest."
"Fine." I said rolling my eyes.
It was at this point that Patrick decided it was time to leave. This was before Joe decided he wanted to kick all of us out. Andy left a few minutes after and we went to dinner without Joe.
Joe watched the video over and over then he finally stopped it. He then grabbed the nearest phallic object to him and swung at the R2 unit.
"Only. God. KNOWS. How. Much. I. Fucking. HATE!. You! YOU. Bitch! How. Dare. You. Hurt. Me. Like. This?! I've. Done. Nothing. But. Love. YOU. To. The. Best. Of. MY. Ability! And. All. You. Do. Is. Hurt. ME!" Joe finished as with each word he hit the R2 Unit with the object, with all his might.
The tears rolled from his eyes as he dropped the long piece of styrofoam, defeted. All the R2 Unit did when Joe was finished was beep and whistle happily along. It rolled across the room into the kitchen and went around and round in circles.
Joe sighed exhausted as the R2 Unit shut its self down in the kitchen.
*
"I just hope its not in pieces when I pick him up for his birthday party tomorrow." Patrick sighed.
"I don't think he's that stupid. Do you know how much that thing cost?" I said laughing.
"How much?" They asked.
"I don't know which is why I said 'do you know?'."
Andy got up and drove the hour home.
The next call I got was from Gin. She was having a moment.
"I'll drop you off at home and I'm gonna go see what crisis she's having today." I said laughing as I gave him a kiss on the cheek.
"How long will you be gone?" Patrick asked.
"Not long."
~
I parked and walked up the few flights to Gin's. The door was open and I pushed it in. All the lights were off except for one. I walked into the other room and she was sitting on the floor with her legs crossed. Gin was playing a very famaliar guitar and I sat next to her.
"Genovieve..." I trailed off.
"Did he like it?" Ginny asked.
"He loved it." I lied.
As a matter of fact, I never saw what happened after we left. I had to lie to her because this bitch looked in really bad shape. I rubbed my belly gently and she touched her hand were Thing 1 was.
Gin was playing what she knew from Guns and Roses' 'November Rain'. She got half way through Slash's solo and stopped.
"Do you know that I had this thing for Slash? I mean like...really had a thing for him." Gin stated.
"What?"
"You know that feeling you get like right before sex, durning sex or the fact that you may get sex?"
"Huh?"
"All thoes years, I've realived that Slash got me horny. I was 9½ years old getting horny. Fuck."
I started to laugh but Gin was serious as all get out. I leaned over and gave her a hug. I guess maybe she's just a bit tired.
"You are going to Joe's party tomorrow right? Right? Right? Right!" I demanded.
"I love you Calista." Gin pouted.
"I love you too Genovieve." I stated, "where'd you score the guitar?"
"Stole it." Gin mumbled.
"From?"
"Joe."
"This is the one he's been looking for since-"
"Yea."
"And you've had it the whole time?"
"Sure."
"You're gonna be ok right?"
"Yes."
"I can go home?"
"Yea."
"What's with the monosyllabic answers?"
Gin shrugged her shoulders and I rolled my eyes.
"I think I'm gonna go home." I said softly.
"Ok."
When I got home I went to take a shower. I was hoping there'd be a chance of sex, but there wasn't. Patrick was almost asleep when I got out. The fact that we laid there and he just held me was better than sex anyway.
Patrick rubbed my stomach and the babies moved along with him. This was his life and I was just living it. The faithful husband, the doting father, the fucking kick ass musican/producer that EVERYONE wants a piece of. I just don't want things to ever change between us.
~
The next day I walked into Joe's and Pete was doing his eyeliner. I couldn't stop laughing because I then expected him to come out the ground, a là '...Arms Race' he had the top hat and everything. Joe had on leather pants and this black shirt and I looked around for Gin.
Gin walked in right behind me but Joe didn't see her. She saw R2-D2 in the corner and gave a sigh of relef. I then gave a ½ smirk.
"I told you." I stated.
"Yea. I could use a drink." Gin stated.
Gin went to the frige and opened a bottle of Heineken. Patrick then walked by and took it out of her hand.
"I forgot." Gin stated grabbing a water, "I'm leaving. This all feels weird."
"I'll go too."
Gin and I left and Joe only caught the backside of her.
"Is she gonna be there?" Joe asked.
"Do you not want her there?" Patrick questioned.
"I don't know...I guess if Baby Killer wants to be there." Joe trailed off
@@@@
That's it for tonight kids! Its Cali's bed time she has to get up and stuff monkeys into boxes....
Yes you heard me leave reviews!
Besos,
Cali.
We left the house and got into the car. A bit later we pulled up to Joe's.
The moment Joe got the box ½ opened his eyes got huge and he started to laugh. He then picked up his phone and called Pete.
"Peter!" Joe said laughing.
"What's up?" Pete asked.
"Dude. What did you send me for my birthday?"
"I don't...I didn't send you anything."
"Come on bro! Don't lie."
"I'm not lying."
"Dude. There's this huge box sitting in my living room."
"What?"
"Really."
"Well that wasn't me."
"Hmmm." Joe sighed absolutly confused about this big box.
Joe walked around this box some more and just admired it. He couldn't stop laughing. All he wondered was who in the hell got whatever was in this box for him. Suddenly everyone Joe had called was at his place, except for Pete.
"I just wanted to see box." Patrick stated.
"I mean I should be at my house, but Patrick's all like oooh Cali you must come with me. And I'm all like I don't wanna. And he goes Joe's got those matzah's you like...I want the matzah's Joe."
Joe went into the kitchen to get the matzah's and handed them off to me. I sat in my little corner with this box of matzah's and sighed lovingly. It just came to the point where I just ate all the time.
I felt sorrie for Patrick because I've been a d-bag when it came to food. But I swear he didn't understand what was going on with my body.
"How does it go? Yes. 'Well I'm gonna keep on loving you cuz its the only thing I wanna do I don't wanna sleep / I just wanna keep on loving you...' " I sung into the box, "what?"
"Nothing." Joe said laughing.
"What is it?" Andy questioned.
"I don't know. It doesn't want to open."
I then got up because it seemed like it was taking too many boys to open that box. The moment I got up, I looked for a weak spot and cracked my back.
"Say My Name!" I said punching the box with all my might, then walking away with a smile,
"Game, bitches."
The box then collasped on its own accord and I walked back to my box of Kosher cinnamon-sugar matzah's. They were fantastic for being 3 months old if I do say so myself.
Joe rose his eyebrow at me and smiled. There was another box over it and he pulled it off. I started to laugh with the other guys as styrofoam and plastic dividers and packaging eggs came out the box too. When Joe finally got to his gift his blue eyes got huge.
He brought his hand to run it through his curls but he was still shaved clean.
"OH. MY. GOD!" Joe squealed.
I then looked around the corner and my mouth dropped. This must have been what Ginny was talking about sometime last week. Joe was so geeked and then looked at me.
"Calista...?" Joe sighed with this look.
"Happy Birthday Jewseph!" I said laughing.
"You just know me-"
Patrick and Andy then clammoured around the true to life R2-D2 that 'I' had gotten Joe. Gin was gonna be geeked that he got it but not so much if he tossed it out. So I did all I could do to salvage the gift.
Joe turned the R2-D2 around and around. He knew there was something wrong with this. He had mentioned an awesome R2-D2 unit to one other person, and it wasn't me. There was a piece of paper by a red button that said: 'Move Me To A Blank Wall & Hit Play.'
This I didn't know about. When Joe hit play it was a video Genovieve made for him and I knew nothing about.
"Well babe, its maybe somewhere near September and we've been together for 7 or 8 or 9 months....and I'm thinking maybe we should go big-"
"We don't have to watch this..." I said moving towards the R2 unit.
"NO!" Joe yelled, "I wanna see the rest."
"Fine." I said rolling my eyes.
It was at this point that Patrick decided it was time to leave. This was before Joe decided he wanted to kick all of us out. Andy left a few minutes after and we went to dinner without Joe.
Joe watched the video over and over then he finally stopped it. He then grabbed the nearest phallic object to him and swung at the R2 unit.
"Only. God. KNOWS. How. Much. I. Fucking. HATE!. You! YOU. Bitch! How. Dare. You. Hurt. Me. Like. This?! I've. Done. Nothing. But. Love. YOU. To. The. Best. Of. MY. Ability! And. All. You. Do. Is. Hurt. ME!" Joe finished as with each word he hit the R2 Unit with the object, with all his might.
The tears rolled from his eyes as he dropped the long piece of styrofoam, defeted. All the R2 Unit did when Joe was finished was beep and whistle happily along. It rolled across the room into the kitchen and went around and round in circles.
Joe sighed exhausted as the R2 Unit shut its self down in the kitchen.
*
"I just hope its not in pieces when I pick him up for his birthday party tomorrow." Patrick sighed.
"I don't think he's that stupid. Do you know how much that thing cost?" I said laughing.
"How much?" They asked.
"I don't know which is why I said 'do you know?'."
Andy got up and drove the hour home.
The next call I got was from Gin. She was having a moment.
"I'll drop you off at home and I'm gonna go see what crisis she's having today." I said laughing as I gave him a kiss on the cheek.
"How long will you be gone?" Patrick asked.
"Not long."
~
I parked and walked up the few flights to Gin's. The door was open and I pushed it in. All the lights were off except for one. I walked into the other room and she was sitting on the floor with her legs crossed. Gin was playing a very famaliar guitar and I sat next to her.
"Genovieve..." I trailed off.
"Did he like it?" Ginny asked.
"He loved it." I lied.
As a matter of fact, I never saw what happened after we left. I had to lie to her because this bitch looked in really bad shape. I rubbed my belly gently and she touched her hand were Thing 1 was.
Gin was playing what she knew from Guns and Roses' 'November Rain'. She got half way through Slash's solo and stopped.
"Do you know that I had this thing for Slash? I mean like...really had a thing for him." Gin stated.
"What?"
"You know that feeling you get like right before sex, durning sex or the fact that you may get sex?"
"Huh?"
"All thoes years, I've realived that Slash got me horny. I was 9½ years old getting horny. Fuck."
I started to laugh but Gin was serious as all get out. I leaned over and gave her a hug. I guess maybe she's just a bit tired.
"You are going to Joe's party tomorrow right? Right? Right? Right!" I demanded.
"I love you Calista." Gin pouted.
"I love you too Genovieve." I stated, "where'd you score the guitar?"
"Stole it." Gin mumbled.
"From?"
"Joe."
"This is the one he's been looking for since-"
"Yea."
"And you've had it the whole time?"
"Sure."
"You're gonna be ok right?"
"Yes."
"I can go home?"
"Yea."
"What's with the monosyllabic answers?"
Gin shrugged her shoulders and I rolled my eyes.
"I think I'm gonna go home." I said softly.
"Ok."
When I got home I went to take a shower. I was hoping there'd be a chance of sex, but there wasn't. Patrick was almost asleep when I got out. The fact that we laid there and he just held me was better than sex anyway.
Patrick rubbed my stomach and the babies moved along with him. This was his life and I was just living it. The faithful husband, the doting father, the fucking kick ass musican/producer that EVERYONE wants a piece of. I just don't want things to ever change between us.
~
The next day I walked into Joe's and Pete was doing his eyeliner. I couldn't stop laughing because I then expected him to come out the ground, a là '...Arms Race' he had the top hat and everything. Joe had on leather pants and this black shirt and I looked around for Gin.
Gin walked in right behind me but Joe didn't see her. She saw R2-D2 in the corner and gave a sigh of relef. I then gave a ½ smirk.
"I told you." I stated.
"Yea. I could use a drink." Gin stated.
Gin went to the frige and opened a bottle of Heineken. Patrick then walked by and took it out of her hand.
"I forgot." Gin stated grabbing a water, "I'm leaving. This all feels weird."
"I'll go too."
Gin and I left and Joe only caught the backside of her.
"Is she gonna be there?" Joe asked.
"Do you not want her there?" Patrick questioned.
"I don't know...I guess if Baby Killer wants to be there." Joe trailed off
@@@@
That's it for tonight kids! Its Cali's bed time she has to get up and stuff monkeys into boxes....
Yes you heard me leave reviews!
Besos,
Cali.
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