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Stuttering 118
We were sitting at Weiss Memorial Hospital in the ER all looking spent.
"I can't believe this." I sighed.
"You?" Joe asked,
"I asked her to go get my phone. I pouted. Im going to be someone's dad and im still pouting to my wife? That's sad."
"It is." I chimed in.
"We're not married Joey." Gin mumbled softly.
"But we will be when-"
"When I convert and such?"
"Well..."
"Hold your breath."
"Now you've got her mad at me!" Joe sighed.
"Me? You don't wanna marry her because she won't convert. She's got more love for you than ever Joseph. I don't see what's wrong with you Fuckheads. By the way fuckhead = boys. Not your cock. Its a new noun, write that down." I concluded as Gin rolled her eyes.
"Even that hurted. And im bleeding all over Joe." Gin sighed.
It was a while before the emergency doctor saw Gin. She had fallen asleep face first in Joe's lap, something about her head not hurting like this. This made me laugh and I took a picture to commemorate this PERFECT Valentine's Day. Joe's pants looked like a crime scene and I sighed.
"Im sorrie Joe." I mumbled,
"he does have a habit and exsponged record of hitting pregnant ladies."
"He does." Joe laughed softly,
"she'll be fine right?"
"Yea, its probably nothing."
"Good...im sorrie about tonight."
"Nah, it was gonna happen. By the way...next time warn me if you're gonna give him a good push in the right direction ok?"
"It wasn't me."
"It was. I know it was. Be greatful im not hurting you. Im thanking you...ok?"
"Yea."
About 20 minutes later we were looking at X-Rays of Gin's cranium and her nose was broken. I shook my head and she leaned her head on Joe's chest. He held her softly and ran his fingers through the ends of her hair. I rolled my eyes and we listened to the doctor.
"Because you're so far along in your pregnancy we'd figure you'll snore a little and then you can get it fixed when you have the baby." Dr. Stahl stated.
"Umm, how long am I gonna sound like this? And with the baby under here I can't breathe well." Gin added.
"Yea, we're gonna send you home with oxygen and when you sleep..."
"Don't finish that sentence. Im an old person. And this headache?"
"We can't give you anything that'll knock it out, only low dose asprine." Dr. Stahl added,
"so you ran into your friend who talks with his hands?"
"Why is that so hard to believe? Because of him? He just looks like this. But he's Jewish. His mother would kill him. We can't do anything now, really?" Gin suddenly stated.
"No..."
Gin was breathing through her mouth for the next 25 minutes as we continued to talk to the doctor and was getting on her own nerves. Because now there was an annoying high pitched whistle. I tried my hardest not to laugh but couldn't hold it back. Gin closed her mouth and I laughed harder. This wasn't funny but this shit is hilarious.
"I can't live like this Dr. Stahl." Gin added.
"I could pop it kinda back in place but its gonna hurt more and you nose will start to bleed again."
"What do you say Joe?" Gin asked him.
"Can I do it?" Joe questioned.
"Masochist." Gin and I said together.
"Oh well. I tried."
Without even thinking about it Joe held her head, Dr. Stahl grabbed her nose and popped it. As the blood seeped some more I could see that my friend could breathe a little bit better. That's all she needed, just a little short term adjustment.
"That hurt like fuck yo." Gin said as she wiped away a few tears, "I still look and sound funny."
"You've always looked funny." I stated laughing my ass off,
"please don't ever walk by Patrick again."
"I'll try."
The next person to walk into the room was Joe's dad. I put my head in my hand and laughed. He gave me and Joe this look and I was confused. What's with that not cool look? I didn't break her nose, Patrick did.
"Genevieve you must like the hospital." Robert said going through his phone then putting it back into its holster,
"what happened?"
"Calista and Patrick were yelling at each other and you know Patrick, when frustration kicks in, he's all arms. And then Joe pouted at me and the next thing I know my nose is just bleeding."
"Joseph."
"Father."
Dr. Stahl looked at the all of us and shook his head.
"I guess things are ok then?" Dr. Stahl asked.
"I mean im still dripping blood and I can't sleep on my stomach. My nose hurts like hell and now I have this fucking make shift cast bull on my nose. Im not impressed. Lets go."
Gin walked out the doctor's office without being released, a bit ticked off. Joe followed en suite and he put his arms around her.
"Where you going beautiful?" Joe asked.
"Im walking home."
"Yes. You're gonna walk home. 5½ miles. I'll walk with you."
I pulled up 7 minutes later and they were sitting on a bench. I turned my head and sighed Joe just looked utterly pale.
"What's up you 2?" I asked yelling out the truck.
"I think my water just broke." Gin stated.
"Its too early." I responded.
"We know that. How about your sweet ass help me back to the hospital?" Gin asked.
"Lets go." I said opening the door.
"See here's the problem...im having debilitating cramps and I can't move. So all I need is a few minutes to collect myself and we'll be off."
"Ok."
We sat there for 9 minutes until Gin could move from the bench to my truck. I took a glance at Joe and he looked more pale than before. I didn't know if it was because he knew he was about to be someone's dad or if the scare of having early babies was creeping upon him. When I finally got him into the car we were off to the hospital.
It had to be about 4 hours when we got back to Gin & Joe's laughing.
"God I feel like such a douche." Gin stated.
I was too busy LAUGHING to pay attention to her.
"You know. The next time you have to pee I suggest you find a bathroom." I added doubling over in pain from laughing so hard,
"im gonna go home and see if Patrick kidnapped my kids."
Joe curled up next to Gin and she went under the blanket annoyed.
I left, locked up and went to my house.
When I walked into my house roses were still everywhere and I was suddenly remembered what happened here. I picked up the broom and started to sweep the floor. I was so glad that I just put down hardwood flooring and that this wouldn't stain a carpet.
But getting closer to the floor I noticed that now I officially have to clean up blood too. Patrick was sleeping on the couch with Sofia on his belly and Roman in the car seat next to him. The TV was on music videos and they were having a Fall Out Boy set. I was going to move Roman when Patrick sung out 'I don't caaaaaaaaaaaaaaare!!!' and I looked at my kid with his eyes glued to the TV watching his daddy jam.
"You should be sleeping handsome." I said softly as i picked him up and he nuzzled into my neck,
"I know, I know but its bed time."
I looked at the hall clock and it said 715a. I can't believe this is the end of this long ass night.
When I woke up around 226p that afternoon I popped out of my bed confused. I didn't know where the babies were and the house was too quiet. I hated sleeping this long even after a crazy night. It's just that I never wanted to be away from the babies. When I went to go pee I had the baby monitor in my hand along with my cell phone incase of breaking news.
It was Patrick's mom, Pat, who texted me saying that she got the twins dressed and took them for day. She also said she she'd bring them back later around 7p in the afternoon.
I walked around the house and paced the floor. I feel as if a put a groove into the hardwood.
I then found a box of Crayola color pencils and started to draw something else and out of no where I suddenly felt inspired. I then walked over to my fax machine and faxed Gin.
When I picked up my phone she sounded like she just woke up.
"Y que es eso mamasita?" Gin asked pulling the paper down.
"Our coutour line." I said with a smile.
"Coutour? Really? What's it called?"
"Cal & Gin."
"That's fucking sweet."
"Im really excited about this."
"Very good. Now. May I go back to sleep?"
"No! Get up and come see me."
"But Joe's cuddled up under me."
"So. Move your ass."
"Oh. I gotta go Joe."