FicWad

Once I get myself into control; only by attempting to force Gerard out of my mind, I make the five minute drive back to the hospital, where an exhausted Frank is asleep in Thalia’s room.
I go inside, taking quiet steps. I set the coffee and candy down on the table next to Frankie, then I turn to see my best friend, awake, looking at me,
“Rain?” She asks, dazed.
“Thalia! You’re awake!” I run to her, pulling her into my arms gently.
“Hi Rain!” She says in a soft voice.
“Do you feel ok?” I ask her.
She nods. “And I’m better now that you’re here.” I smile.
She looks around the room, smiling brightly when she sees Frankie in the chair, curled up like a little kid.
“He’s barely left you at all. I don’t think he got any sleep last night.” I laugh.
Thalia looks up at me. “You don’t look too great either Rain. Is something wrong?”
Oh shit. No. Why did she have to say that?
“No. I’m fine.” I say, attempting to sound smooth.
Thalia furrows her eyebrows. “No, I don’t think you are. You look tired, and…” she doesn’t finish the sentence. Instead she looks me over, and her eyes go to my wrists. Before I can stop her, she takes a pale hand and grabs my right wrist, gasping hugely.
“Rain! What did you do?” She looks frantic.
“Nothing, nothing. It was an accident.”
“An accident where you cut yourself so deeply you needed stitches?” Her voice is unnaturally high.
“Thalia, calm down! I’m fine, I promise.” I look her in the eye. She stares back, then sighs, dropping my wrist and shaking her head back and forth.
“I’m glad you had the sense to get stitches.” She says bitterly.
“Thalia, don’t be angry. Please.” I plead.
“Fine. But you will tell me about it.” She glares up at me.
“Sure.” I say, looking away and off into the corner.
There’s an oquard (yeah, I know that’s not how it’s spelled, but that’s how it should be spelled.) silence, especially for me and Thalia.
“So, what’s it like, in New York City all the time?” She asks in an attempt to break it.
“It’s cool. I found an amazing comic store.”
“Really?” She says excited, interested now.
But I’ve struck myself again, my mind going back to him. With as much force as I can muster, I try again to get his face out of my head.
“Mmhm. And I found a new comic you have to read.”
“What is it?” Thalia is scrutinizing me, especially my face and eyes, and I’m not sure why.
“Doom Patrol. It’s a Grant Morrison.”
“How’d you find it?”
My answer flies out of my mouth before I can stop it. “Someone recommended it to me.” I bite my lip, and I understand why Thalia was watching me so intently.
She smiles, knowing she’s caught me. “Who was it?” I bite my lip still, and she says, “Alright, admit it. I caught you. I found what’s bothering you. Now tell me about him.” She looks me right in the eye.
“Who said it was a boy?” I ask.
“You did. Now tell me.”
I sigh. Then I think about it, and I realize I want to talk about him. I need to talk about him. And if there’s anyone that I would tell, it’s Thalia.
“Fine. So, at school, I met this boy, Gerard.”
She snorts. “Sorry. His name.” My look silences her. “Go on.”
“Anyway, on the first day, he took me out for coffee-“
“Sorry. One more thing, then I’m done.” I raise an eyebrow. “Describe him please. I need to know what he looks like. Is he hot?”
I feel myself blushing when I nod. “He’s really pale, and he’s got black hair. It’s pretty long; comes down to his chin. He’s got the most beautiful eyes; almond shaped, and hazel. His nose is pointy, and it goes up a tiny bit.”
Thalia nods approvingly. “Sounds good. Sorry about that.”
“It’s fine.” I laugh. I’m happy to talk about him. “So, he took me out for coffee. He was sort of shy, but very sweet, gentleman. He’s an incredible artist, the best I’ve met since I’ve been there.”
“So what’s wrong?” Thalia asks. She’s not going to let it slide by.
I take a deep breath. “I don’t know. The second day, he came in really hung over.”
“That’s not a big deal. He probably went to a party.”
“I don’t know Thalia. He’s not really that kind of a guy.”
“What else?”
“Well, after he was hung over, I helped him out and took him back to his dorm, because he felt really bad. Then the next day, he called me and asked if I wanted to do something. He took me to a comic shop…” I trail off, temporarily lost in my memories. Thalia looks at me, patient, but expectant; waiting for me to continue.
“We did stuff every day after school for the next week or so…then I got the message from Frank.” I take a deep breath, blinking back a couple tears. “I was scared, and desperate. I was…cutting. Gerard walked in and my hand slipped, and I cut way too big and too deep. Gerard freaked out, and took me to the hospital. Then he took me back to my dorm. He stayed the night.”
“HE STAYED THE NIGHT? WAS IT COOL?” Thalia says loudly.
I raise an eyebrow. “Thals, he stayed the night. With all garments on.” I stress this.
She looks mildly disappointed.
“ I came here this morning, soon after I woke up-“
“You haven’t explained what else is bothering you. No offense but I don’t care about this part. Tell me what’s wrong. Why are you worried about him?”
I inhale for the seemingly hundreth time. “I’m worried, because two Xanax fell out of his pocket in my dorm. And because I saw him with his brother, here. He was begging his brother to let him get pills. And he said something about not drinking anymore. So I think that maybe…I don’t know.”
Thalia smiles. “He’s just a guy. It’ll be fine. So he takes anti depressants. He might have had a little bit of a drinking thing. So do half of the guys at our school. He’ll stop.”
I nod, forcing myself to believe her.